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breaking dishes up in here

Summary:

They trusted Pike with one thing. One. And he couldn’t even fucking do it.

Notes:

so, i’m supposed to be working on my long fic… in theory. in practice, i got this idea, sat down and wrote it. born out of a small drabble i posted on tumblr, it’s now a thing.

to preface: yes, i’m a hayden pike hater, born, raised and proud. if you’re a fan of the “good friend hayden pike” trope, then it’s very likely not for you. especially if you’re a fanmail outing apologist. no hard feelings, just couldn’t be me.

anyway, pike haters unite and enjoy.

title is from breakin' dishes by rihanna.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

It was, admittedly, quite a strange situation. Ilya didn't plan on it, and he knew Shane certainly didn’t either. They — Shane, really — invited Pike over to their house in Ottawa. For dinner. Ilya could roll his eyes right now just thinking about it. Something, something, bonding before the wedding, something… He agreed, for Shane, of course. Didn’t mean he had to be chipper about it.

And then, by some miracle, when Pike was halfway on the road, they got a call. One of the Irina Foundation donors requested a meeting, urgently, and both of them had to be there. For whatever reason. Ilya couldn’t say he understood. They didn’t want Yuna there, either, so that was… Strange, by all counts. Still, Ilya was relieved. Dinner with Pike was delayed by at least a few hours, and he didn’t even have to do anything.

While Ilya was packing them some road snacks, Shane called Pike to explain the situation. Ilya couldn’t hear everything, but he did catch Shane telling him the code to the front door. When Shane came back into the kitchen, Ilya gave him a skeptical look.

“What?” Shane’s forehead wrinkled. “It’d be rude to make him wait outside.”

“So it is better to leave Pike alone in our house for three hours. And tell him the code.”

Shane sighed as he walked up to Ilya. He pecked his lips softly, and Ilya melted. He could never resist a kiss this soft.

“It’s just Hayden, Ilya. He won’t tell anyone. And we can change it later anyway.”

Shane’s eyes were huge and pretty, so naturally, Ilya agreed.

Now they were driving back from somewhere, after their meeting about something. The whole thing was weirdly blurry. He couldn’t quite remember what they were talking about, or even who the donors were. They kind of just… were. Ilya hoped Shane had been taking notes.

Just as they turned the corner toward their street, they were met with a sight — Pike rushing along the sidewalk, looking disheveled and distressed. When he saw their car, he started frantically waving and gesturing for them to pull over. Ilya and Shane exchanged looks, and Shane parked the car.

They barely managed to get out when Pike came to an abrupt stop in front of them. He folded in half and wheezed, looking like he was about to collapse right there. Ilya thought briefly that he wouldn’t mind that.

“Hayden, what—”

Shane’s voice stumbled when Pike straightened up, still breathing heavily. Ilya raised his eyebrows. Pike was somehow red like an overripe tomato and pale like a ghost at the same time. It would be funny if the whole situation wasn’t so bizarre.

“Guys, I’m— Fuck.”

Pike’s eyes darted briskly between Shane and Ilya, settling on Shane in the end.

“I’m sorry, okay? Before I say anything, you have to know, I didn’t—”

“Hayden, what happened?” Shane cut him off. Ilya noticed the tension in his voice and took his hand, lacing their fingers together. He wasn’t too excited about Pike’s strange behavior either, but knowing Shane’s tendency to panic, he imagined he felt much worse.

“I… Fuck.” Pike scratched the back of his neck, then took a deep breath. “I did everything you said, Shane, I swear. I got there, parked, put the code in, but…”

He trailed off, swallowing hard. Ilya’s jaw clenched. He didn’t like where this was going. At all. His thumb rubbed circles into the back of Shane’s hand, to ground his fiancé as much as himself.

“But what?” Shane asked impatiently.

“I was on my phone, alright?” Pike snapped. Ilya almost snapped back. “Jackie sent me a funny video. Two kangaroos fighting. It was really fucking funny, Shane, they were—”

“Pike,” Ilya muttered through gritted teeth. “We do not give a shit about kangaroos. What the fuck happened?”

Pike shot him a look. Ilya raised an eyebrow. Shane shifted on his feet and cleared his throat. That seemed to bring Pike back to it.

“I went to the living room, sat on the couch and kinda just… I don’t know, fell asleep?” He was scratching his arm now. “I was on Instagram, and then I woke up with my phone on my face.”

“Very interesting,” Ilya said flatly. “And this is why you run here like you are chased by wolves? To say you fell asleep?”

Pike shook his head. Shane let out a breath that sounded like pure exasperation.

“Just get to it,” Shane urged.

“Fuck, okay.”

Pike swallowed again. His eyes started that weird jittery thing between Ilya and Shane.

“I… I forgot to lock the door, okay? I just closed it. But I didn’t lock it. Like I said, I was on my phone, so I didn’t… You know.”

Ilya’s heart dropped right into his stomach. He could faintly feel Shane stiffening beside him, and he was sure he had the same exact thoughts running through his head.

Didn’t lock the door. The security system didn’t activate. No lock. No security. No alarm. No nothing.

“And I, uh… When I woke up, it was…”

Ilya would punch Pike if he continued stalling. He knew he would. His hand was twitching in Shane’s, but Shane didn’t even stop it — his own was clammy and sweaty in Ilya’s.

“Hayden.” Shane’s voice trembled just slightly, but enough for Ilya to catch it.

“It was trashed,” Pike finally said on an exhale. “Like, completely. Glass everywhere, chairs and tables upside down, your TV gone, your… everything. It was all gone, Shane.”

Ilya felt a lump in his throat so huge it was starting to choke him. He was numb for a few moments, just trying to take in the words that had just fallen out of Pike’s mouth.

Trashed. Glass. Gone. Glass. Trashed. Gone. Gone. Gone.

His stupor ended as soon as Shane’s hand slipped out of his. Shane was already ahead when Ilya’s legs followed, quickly catching up and overtaking him. Their house wasn’t far from where Pike met them — just down the street. It took them less than a couple of minutes to reach it. Ilya could hear Pike panting behind them, but it was the least of his concerns right now.

The gate was predictably unlocked. Ilya rushed up the tiled path, Shane right on his heels. He almost stumbled into Ilya’s back, catching himself against his shoulder when the house finally came into view.

Ilya felt the knot in his stomach tightening so hard he nearly threw up. It was a disaster even from the outside. Windows broken, bushes in front of them smushed, like they had been trampled on. The door was thrown wide open, and Ilya noted darkly that Pike didn’t even bother to close it when he was apparently in a hurry to get to them.

“Fuck,” Shane whispered next to him, and then he was running again. Ilya followed, though his legs suddenly felt weak.

Inside was worse. Pike was right in one thing — trashed. The walls were bare, stripped of all the art Ilya had accumulated over the years with Shane’s help — his designer’s, really. The TV table was turned over and cracked, no TV or console in sight. Their safe — fuck, their safe — was open and terrifyingly empty. Cash, fuck the cash — the album Ilya kept of the rare polaroids he and Shane took together when the weight of their secret pressed just a bit harder. All the memories they managed to collect since Ilya’s move to Ottawa. In someone else’s hands now. Gone.

“I’m so sorry, Shane.”

Up until this moment, Ilya had almost forgotten that Pike existed. It would be better if he did. He turned slowly, because his legs still felt like lead. Pike was standing there, among the destruction he had caused, with an expression of a kicked puppy. Ilya wanted to kick him for real.

He looked at Shane, who didn’t seem to pay any attention to Pike. He was staring ahead instead, his expression just as empty as that fucking safe.

“I don’t really check the door, you know.” Pike tried for a laugh, then quickly aborted it at Ilya’s sharp glare. “I never would have left it unlocked if I did. You know that, right? I fucked up, I really did.”

Shane didn’t move. He barely even breathed, Ilya noticed. Shit. He knew exactly what that meant. Shane was about to have a panic attack.

Ilya quickly walked over to him and placed a hand on the back of his neck. His hand trembled. As much as he tried to stop it and stay strong for Shane, it didn’t work. He felt sick, and Shane must’ve sensed it too, because his eyes had gone glassy and out of focus.

Ilya was going to murder Pike. He was going to— Fuck. His vision blurred. Pike was still talking, but his voice was muffled now, as if he was talking through a thick layer of cotton. He was going to kill him. He was—


Ilya jolted awake. For a moment, he was completely disoriented. His heart was beating fast, as if he had just finished an intense round of conditioning.

He looked around, and his pulse slowed slightly. Shane was next to him, still sleeping, his head tucked into the crook of Ilya’s arm. They were in Montreal, at Shane’s place, and they were safe.

Ilya’s breath stuttered as he leaned in and pressed a kiss to Shane’s forehead. Shane stirred, wrinkling his nose adorably. He nuzzled into Ilya’s neck, and Ilya smiled, letting him have his fill.

He looked down at their feet. Anya was snoring quietly, curled up into a cute little ball. Fuck, she wasn’t even in that stupid dream. Ilya was thankful for that, at least.

Shane’s lips were halfway up to Ilya’s when the doorbell rang. Ilya frowned. They weren’t expecting anyone, he was sure of it. Least of all at nine in the morning.

Shane shot him a quizzical look. “Did you order more dog toys?”

Ilya shook his head. “No.”

The doorbell rang again, waking Anya up. She jumped off the bed and started barking. Shane sighed and rolled off of Ilya.

“I’d better see who it is.”

Ilya let out a grunt, his hand skimming Shane’s back one last time. The last thing he wanted was letting Shane out of bed today, when he knew he’d have to drive back to Ottawa soon. He watched him pull on his pajama pants and a T-shirt, and then Shane disappeared down the stairs, Anya at his heels.

Fuck. He’d have to get up too now, wouldn’t he? Ilya rolled out of bed, stretching out his arms with a sigh. He stood up and grabbed a pair of sweatpants from the chair, pulling them on.

“Hi?” he heard Shane’s voice from downstairs. He sounded surprised. “What happened? Is everyone alright? Come in.”

Ilya walked out of the bedroom, pausing at the top of the stairs. His stomach twisted when he saw who was trailing behind Shane.

“Hayden?”

“Sorry to show up like this, but, um… Can we sit, maybe?”

Notes:

thanks for reading <3

so this was interesting. hope the point came through. i quite enjoyed writing this. felt kinda therapeutic, in a way.

feel free to share your thoughts, i'm always happy to hear it.

♡ you can find me on tumblr

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