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Takemichi stared out of the window, the panoramic view of Tokyo's neon lit streets giving him different things to focus on. A sign, a restaurant, a salary man passed out on the sidewalk. Well, it was hard to make out, he was on the tenth floor after all. Then again, what else could they all be? Even if they all seemed so small from here, they were still distinct in shape.
"Mitchy..." a voice called out to him. It was neither cold nor warm. Or maybe it was... Takemichi doesn't remember.
His eyes drift lazily to the figure on top of him. White hair, eye bags, eyes as deep as an endless void. The closeness they shared was a deep comfort for him. Gentle, warm and kind in every movement and touch.
"Mikey-kun" he replied shortly which seemed to make a frown twist upon those chapped lips. He didn't say anything, didn't comment at all, not even a single reprimand. Instead, he leaned down and gave a gentle kiss on his lips. And that was enough. It always would be for him. For both of them.
Manjiro stared at the ceiling, a light layer of sweat covering his skin. He gave a small sigh, was he content or was he unsatisfied? It was always hard to tell. Did he even know what either felt like anymore? He's not sure.
He turned his head to the side, his chest feeling lighter as his eyes landed on a dark haired male. He reached out his hand to brush away a few strands of hair that had fallen onto the sleeping male's face. "My Mitchy" he mumbled before cupping his cheek, his thumb gently rubbing against his cheek.
This stirred the other awake, his eyes slowly opening. Dull blue stared back at him. Manjiro felt his chest tighten once again.
He ignored it.
"Did you sleep well?" He asked instead with a small quirk of his lips.
Takemitchy stared at him for a long while before giving a small hum. "I guess" he said as he closed his eyes again. "I already forgot what my dream was about." He added as an after thought, a small yawn escaping his lips.
Manjiro wasn't exactly pleased by those words, though he figured this was better than the nightmares that plagued his Mitchy's dreams.
"Want to sleep more? Or do you want breakfast?" Manjiro decided to change the topic, it was better than the rabbit hole they would've gone down if he's asked about it.
Takemitchy had a pondering look on his face. "Breakfast sounds good" eventually left his mouth and the two got out of bed. Manjiro brought the other to the bath first to let him relax while he prepared a simple breakfast. He wasn't good at cooking, that was more E̶m̶m̶a̶'̶s̶ Kakucho's forte. Honestly, Takemitchy was better than Manjiro when it came to cooking, but he could at least handle frying a few eggs and some bacon as well as toast a couple of slices of bread.
After he finished frying, he plated the food before heading back into the bathroom where Takemitchy was still sitting the the tub, his eyes staring at nothing in particular. He... ended up like this a long time ago. Manjiro's not sure what else he could've done than taken him in... it was his fault after all... it was all his fault.
He didn't want Takemitchy to die. He wouldn't let him. "I'm here, Mitchy" he announced before picking him up from the bath.
"That was quick" the male said as Manjiro set him down on a stool, eyes focused on him now.
Manjiro went to grab a robe from a hook "Well, frying a few eggs doesn't take that long" he replied, helping put the bath robe onto Takemitchy.
The other just hummed as Manjiro picked him up again.
They had a silent breakfast, enjoying the quiet morning together.
Takemichi jolted awake when he heard the sound of a default ringtone, no doubt Mikey's. He lifted his head, lazily looking around for the object before his head was brought back down by a hand. "you can continue sleeping" Mikey said as he got up and walked over to where his phone had been charging.
Takemichi kept laying, but his eyes didn't close. They were set on him. On Mikey.
The white haired male seemed irritated as he picked up the phone. Sanzu had called him again, no doubt in his mind that it was to ask Mikey to go and do his duty as the leader of Bonten. It was always the same song and dance in the mornings when Mikey didn't want to leave Takemichi alone. Somehow he always knew when the other's mental health plummeted. It was almost uncanny.
"I'm not coming to work today. You're my right hand, you can take over every now and the-" Mikey was cut off, evidently it was because of something important considering his widened eyes.
He was silent for a while longer before sighing. "Be there in five."
he hung up the phone and walked over to Takemichi. "I'll call Kakucho up to keep you company. It won't be long." he said quietly as he leaned down to place a kiss on his cheek. "Something came up so I'll be gone for a bit." he stood up and smoothed down his shirt.
Takemichi didn't speak. He barely did, but by now it was a given. "Remember, you can call me whenever. Sleep well, Mitchy" Mikey added before walking out of the room.
He stared at the closed door for a long while before turning his gaze to the window. When did he become like this? He wasn't... him anymore. He's not sure if he ever would be.
It took less than five minutes for Kakucho to arrive. He had this worried look on his face, he always could see right through Takemichi's act.
"Did you take your meds, Michi?" he asked, though he seemed to already know the answer since he was already going over to the night stand where they were kept.
The scarred male stared at the full light blue pill box, a slight frown on his face. He gave a small sigh before opening the compartment for Friday and shaking them out of it. "I'll get your glass of water" he said as he dropped the pills into Takemichi's hand. The blue eyed male stared at the small white pills. They weren't hard to take, he wasn't one to struggle with swallowing them. He just... never remembered. His mind always felt like it was covered in honey, slowing his train of though until he no longer could keep up with reality.
He remembers physical touch well, it's what he both finds comfort in and what makes him want to-
Manjiro sighed internally. Yet another foolish D list criminal trying to harm what is his. Yet another body mangled and thrown in the sea. "Boss, what do we do with them?" Ran asked casually, throwing his bloodied gloves into a plastic bag held by a low ranked member.
His eyes directed to the fool's quivering wife and kids. "did they try anything?" he asked, even if the answer was obvious.
Ran laughed, "didn't even know he was a criminal."
Manjiro sighed, "How typical", he said as he walked over to them and kneeled.
He then lifted one finger. "if you scream, you die."
Then a second went up "If you tattle to the cops, you die."
He gave an emotionless smile "Understood?"
When he got a eager nods, he directed his attention to Ran. "Free them, and keep an eye on them. I don't appreciate liars" he then walked away. Takemitchy would be proud of him for this.
It was March, maybe... or was it April already?
It's unclear to him, really. But it was a long time ago by his standards.
He remembers the days leading up to it well, searching for Mikey desperately, trying to go back into the past to just... fix everything. He just wanted everyone he cared for to be happy... so why wasn't Mikey allowed to be too? Why did he have to suffer while everyone else lived their happily ever afters?
So he searched... and searched...and searched...
He got beat up multiple times. Thrown out of bars owned by Bonten, yelled at for even mentioning the organization's name.
One day, Kazutora had asked to meet up. He could help him meet Mikey, even if just once.
He took the opportunity, it was the only thing he could think of. He could try and reason with Mikey! Try and convince him that he's worthy of being happy too.
Takemichi doesn't remember much of that day nor the following ones.
He never got the chance to meet with Kazutora that day, instead, he was introduced to a hell he never could've imagined before.
...
When Mikey had found him, the expression he wore was something he'd last seen the day Emma was killed. Maybe he really had died. It felt like it at least.
Manjiro held Takemitchy's hand in his own while they watched a movie.
They were calloused and scarred, some nails missing completely, their matrixes ripped to shreds.
His thumb ran over them gently before bringing the hand up to his lips and placing a soft kiss. "You're beautiful" he muttered before staring straight into those dull eyes. "Beautiful..." Takemitchy repeated in a mumble. Manjiro didn't give him a chance to think too hard about it, afraid he'd deny the words, so he pulled Takemitchy into an embrace. "The most beautiful of all" he added, because even with all the scars his body was littered with, Manjiro could only find the other beautiful. Because this was Takemitchy, his hero... and the one he loved.
Takemichi had cooked dinner for them on a random Saturday in the winter. The gesture made Mikey cry and hug him tightly. "Mitchy" he had muttered into his neck with relief, tears soaking his neck.
Sometimes Mikey would act like that around him for the most trivial of things. He once cried when Takemichi had gone outside to buy him a gift.
It was odd, he'd always been the one more prone to crying. Even his nickname of crybaby hero affirmed the thought, yet these days, Mikey seemed to cry more than him.
....
He also looked healthier than before...
It made something warm bloom in Takemichi's chest when he saw the other no longer be skin and bones.
Manjiro had spent months bringing light back into Takemitchy's world. He built the shattered man back up piece by piece, taking time to make sure not to mess anything up. And it worked. Takemitchy went from a shell of his former self that flinched at touch, that threw up any meal he tried, that would avoid people other than him and the other executives like the plague to a guy who could go outside and shop, and to even cook dinner on his own!
The progress made Manjiro so glad, so damn glad that he couldn't help but cry. Even if he hated it, the sensation, the vulnerability, he'd always let them spill for the one he loved.
The years passed by and slowly, Takemitchy became better. And even if he never fully recovers, Manjiro would always be there for him. He'd always be there to protect the person dearest to his heart.
"Mikey-kun" Takemitchy called out, a smile actually on his lips and a shine in his eyes. "Look, it's Musashi shrine!" he exclaimed as he practically ran up the stairs, dragging Manjiro behind him.
And this was how it was meant to be. Mikey would make sure it would never change again.
The road to healing wasn't beautiful. It never would be, really. Even if one made good progress over the years, sometimes, even a small trigger could break it down, even if only temporarily.
"DON'T TOUCH ME!" Takemitchy yelled, poshing whatever he could between them before backing into a corner and sobbing. It broke Manjiro's heart to see him like this. It'd been a bit over a year since the last breakdown. Thankfully though, this wasn't as bad as back then. Takemitchy yelled, cried, screamed, evaded touch but... the worst was the constant scratching. This time, he left that out, just embracing himself tightly while trying to calm down.
Manjiro should've been more careful, he knew seeing him with anyone who seemed vulnerable in public was a sure recipe for disaster. This time was no different. Someone had tried to grab Takemitchy. Had tried taking him...
The guy was dead.
Takemitchy was brought back to HQ.
Takemitchy broke down.
He'd held it in until they made it back, until they were somewhere he felt safe enough to have an outburst like this.
Manjiro still wasn't privy to everything that happened that unfortunate day five years ago. He's not sure if he's ready to hear it either. But he sure as hell would never force Takemitchy to tell him about it, to relive it.
So he waited patiently.
And eventually, Takemitchy calmed back down and sought out comfort in his embrace.
And they continued to try, to slowly heal, because that's all they could do together.
That's the only reason they still lived.
And it was enough. It was enough for them.