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There was this certain itch that spread across Katsuki's entire body like wildfire. It was an itch that he couldn't scratch, something deep within his core that continues to amplify for weeks now. It is almost like a ticking time bomb. Well not almost. That's exactly what it was. Katsuki is like a ticking time bomb the more he moves on with his everyday life. It continued to rise and rise to the point he felt like his head was going to explode or he was going to rocket himself into the sky and explode into big bright orange, yellow and red fireworks across the horizon.
This feeling was so new to Katsuki. This unbearable itch that seems to never go away and it makes him want to scream. It doesn't help that he and Izuku have been dating for three months now, and mind you, it's been the best three months of his life but the last few weeks have been unbearable.
In hindsight, Katsuki had this sudden urge to feel Izuku's body pressed up against his. He doesn't mean this in a sexual way although he wouldn't be opposed to it. The point is, he just wants to feel Izuku lay on top of him. Strong arms wrap around his body in safety. Full body weight of nothing but pure muscle and subtle fat because he knows how much care Izuku puts into his work outs even if it's a light jog around the neighborhood that he can squeeze into his tight schedule.
This sudden urge to be held and pampered. To feel another person's body heat against his own. To cling to someone as if they were his lifeline was driving Katsuki insane. What makes it more absurd is that Katsuki isn't a touchy-feeling type of person.
He doesn't like to be hugged whatsoever. He hasn't ever since he was a kid. His parents would always swaddle him up in their arms, leaving kisses over his reddened face as he tries his hardest to push them away. It's too overwhelming, too suffocating and he doesn't like being in a situation where he's not in control.
And with that you think, maybe it's just a phase. Something his mother often says when he refuses yet another one of her hugs. But the older he gets the more he doesn't like it and it's definitely not a phase.
It doesn't help when he has friends who like physical touch. For instance his friend, Pinky(Mina), she always loves to hug him. Squealing like a dying banshee whenever she sees him. Running at full speed to jump on his back and squeeze the life out of him. As many times he has shoved her face away, she always comes back hugging him tighter, she's like a mother hen.
Shitty hair(Kirishima), Tape(Sero) and Dunce face(Kaminari) love to put their arms around his shoulders, bringing him into a side hug or what they call, a ‘bro hug’ which once again he dislikes so much. Ears(Jirou), on the other hand, is the only one who respects his lack of physical touch, and on the flipside when they did hug once or twice before it was quick and brief that he doesn't even count it as a hug. But through everything, he knows his friends mean well, so he doesn't try to act too disgusted by the physical touch.
But lately he's been having this craving for it. He needs it like he needs sleep. Like he needs to have a bottle of water sitting at his bedside every night. Like he needs to clean every square inch of his home on a daily basis.
Now with all this to say, you can see how this can be nerve wrecking for Katsuki. At first he questioned if he got hit by a mysterious quirk during one of his day patrols but as quick as the thought came, it went.
It was hard for Katsuki to admit this. To admit this sudden want. This sudden need to be held. It opens that part of him that escapes the vulnerability and he has gotten better over the years with therapy. Definitely compared to his middle school and high school self. He's open but still carries that guarded feeling with him.
Which makes it difficult to vocalize that he wants to be held. His boyfriend, Izuku, is the complete opposite of him. He's very touchy, especially with people close to him. Izuku loves to grab his friend's hands or sit close to someone. He likes to give hugs and receive hugs too. When it comes to their relationship, Izuku respects Katsuki's boundaries. Even before they dated and they were just best friends with that hint of a special third option.
Izuku knows how much Katsuki doesn't like to be touchy. Every once in a while, Izuku would grab Katsuki’s hand while they watched a movie together on the couch of the blond’s apartment. Using his thumb to rub and push against the open palm of the blond's hand. Feeling the callouses, the rough and underlying smooth surface knowing the power those same hands held.
Sometimes Izuku, when he's sleepy and not thinking clearly, would walk up to Katsuki in the kitchen and hug him from behind. Strong arms looping around to grip the blond's waist as he hums softly while Katsuki makes breakfast for the both of them.
Everything is still so new between them that Katsuki doesn't mind these soft moments that they share within the space of one another's home; but Katsuki needs more.
It's like a cry from within him to feel Izuku hands ghost against the warmth of his body. To feel that weight of his boyfriend's body pressing him into the mattress beneath him. Katsuki is trying. Really, really really trying to get the message across to Izuku the best way he knows how but the nerd seems to not understand the clue.
To Katsuki, he feels like his message is direct. When they are on night patrol, and it's too dark or too quiet for prying eyes to see them on the sidewalk they walk on, Katsuki's hand would brush against Izuku's own. His pinky jutted out and wrapped around the green-haired nerd pinky for a brief moment. Still not being fond of PDA and also not telling the public they are together because it's none of their business. But that soft touch was good enough to soothe the ache within him.
Another instance is where he was at UA. Walking into the classroom, the brats are already out for lunch and Izuku turns to the sound of someone knocking on the door just to smile, that beautiful bright smile as he says ‘Hi Kacchan!’ in a cheerful voice.
Katsuki's heart would clench with so much love that he sometimes can't believe that Izuku is his boyfriend. He would walk up to the greentte, and hand him his lunch. Their hands would ghost against one another and Katsuki would let it linger for a few agnosizing seconds before pulling away. Moving to one of the students desks and pulling the chair over to the teacher's desk as they both eat their lunch and talk about their day.
When they are out with their friends because Kirishima loves to host one of those bros nights by inviting some of their old classmates out to a gathering. He and Izuku would be walking side by side, shoulders bumping slightly, leaning into the touch before fleeing away. Izuku would look at him and smile, that same softness and that was enough for Katsuki to feel that tingle to shoot up his spine and burn across his body.
Katsuki feels like he's doing the best he can to convey how he feels but lately it's been getting harder to do so. He's irritated. The itch just festered within him, clawing in his stomach and up his throat in fire. The noticeable snappy remarks come out strongly that even his friends begin to notice the slight change. His usual high temper act towards reporters seems to be up in antics. He becomes a bit too harsh when taking down a villain, even if it's a simple petty robbery, he left the thief with a broken arm and got scolded by Best Jeanist for his excessive handling. And through it all, Katsuki does what he always does, play it off. Act like nothing is wrong with him while keeping it all inside.
He's definitely tipping over the edge, ready to explode and so it happens to occur during the evening late into his week after patrol. It's late on a Thursday evening, a little after eight o'clock to be precise. Katsuki and Izuku are sitting on the couch in the living room of the blond's apartment. Katsuki watches a cooking show on a low volume as Izuku on the left side of him grades his student's essays.
Today was a rough day of half patrolling and half desk sitting with piles of incident reports needing to be filled out; A punishment that Jeanist put on him. He's exhausted. He already showered, washing away the dirt, sweat and grime from his body. He's fully clothed in a black tank top and gray sweats. Dinner has already been eaten, a home cooked meal of Katsudon and now small conversation filled the air between him and Izuku. Little teasing remarks about one of the brats essays from Katsuki earns a playful hit on his arm from his boyfriend.
A comfortable and peaceful air continues to blanket over them as Katsuki softly exhales a breath of air while his body sinks further into the grey plush cushion. He can feel his boyfriend's body heat radiating against him. A small space between them but enough to ignite the heat inside of him. The craving that continues to dig deep within his core.
Izuku lets out a soft sigh, shaking his head and muttering along as he reads his student's essays, the pen scratching along the paper as he makes corrections. Katsuki remains seated, watching the show, trying to take his attention away from heat. At one point Izuku gets up, asking Katsuki if he wants anything to drink and Katsuki shakes his head no and Izuku moves his hand to pat his boyfriend's thigh, using that to push himself off before walking away.
That little moment there brings the craving deep within him to expand. It was flaming. As if his quirk ignited within him burning his core. He keeps a straight face, still feeling the lingering touch of Izuku's hand on his thigh.
Katsuki can hear sounds coming from the kitchen. Izuku fills up the teapot with water. Set it on the stove, turning the knobs so the fire can come on, flickering to life. Soft hums echo away from the messy green haired man while he settles on getting his cup and picking up a herbal tea bag, something his mom brought for him and works wonders for his ongoing headache.
On the outside, Katsuki looks content watching the cooking show, trying to show signs of normality. Making snide remarks about the contestant that gets a chuckle from Izuku in the kitchen. Everything seems fine. But on the inside, Katsuki is a cluster of emotional disasters. The craving heat within him seems to expand further leaving that uncontrollable itch to the surface.
He needs to be held with Izuku so far away, not literally because the distance between the open concept living room to the kitchen is a couple strides but it was enough to irritate Katsuki.
It feels like everything triggers him. The sound of the clock that sits on the cream color walls ticks and tocks, flowing through his ears. The wall creaks, a gust of wind from outside passing through making him flinched. Footsteps trampled next door, rowdy, annoying – vibrating the floor boards beneath his sock covered feet. The sound of the water boiling within the teapot on the stove trickles into his ear almost in a sense to correlate the rising tension. It boils and boils and boils and now Katsuki feels like he's on fire, burning throughout his body, seconds away from exploding.
The teapot begins to whistle, singing loudly into the air and Katsuki explodes. He lets out a heavy exhale of breath, feeling his hands begin to heat up, curling his hands to a fist, nails digging into his palm. He gets up from the couch, ears ringing as he unclenches his hands, grabs the remote control to turn off the television, and walks his way over to Izuku in the kitchen. His thoughts are a jumble of mess within his head and not full of sentences that he can just pluck from his brain and say out loud.
Noticing the sudden presence behind him after he pours the water into his tea cup, and placing the teapot back on the stove, Izuku turns around to stare at his boyfriend. The demeanor that Katsuki carries was enough for Izuku to feel concern, vocalizing his thoughts.
“Kacchan, is everything okay?” Izuku asks, noticing his boyfriend's hands ball up into a fist and head hanging low, eyebrows furrowed.
Katsuki doesn't say anything at first. Still trying to form the words that expresses how he feels but it was difficult. Why was it so difficult to just tell his boyfriend that he wanted to be hugged? To feel those strong arms wrapped around his body. To soothe this unbearable itch. Katsuki makes a tsk sound with his mouth, mustering up the courage to say the words that gets an eyebrow raised in confusion from Izuku.
In a low whisper, barely able to hear past his own ears, Katsuki said, “hug….me.”
Izuku stands there confused, not quite understanding what his boyfriend had said.
“Kacchan, what's wrong? Talk to me.” Izuku spoke in the tender tone that always makes Katsuki feel like his heart leaps right out from his chest. He moves his head, staring at Izuku, staring at those wide beautiful green emerald eyes that stare back at him with so much understanding. So much love and that was enough for Katsuki to grab Izuku by his forearm pulling him into a hug, a bit too roughly.
Izuku lets out a little ‘oof’ sound, colliding with Katsuki's chest. He then feels his boyfriend's arms wrapped around him, a shaky breath being let out as he squeezes Izuku, clinging to the old black skull printed shirt of his that Izuku wears. Izuku smiles already knowing what's happening and reciprocates the hug, squeezing Katsuki just as tight.
The warmth to settle within Katsuki eases the itch just on the surface but it wasn't enough. Yes, Izuku felt good within his arms. Strong arms looping around his waist. Their bodies flushed together, heartbeat thumping between them but he needed more.
Growling under his breath, he lightly shoves Izuku off of him and grabs his hand, still keeping the touch close while he pulls Izuku with him, walking towards his bedroom. He can hear Izuku say something about the tea and his essays but Katsuki shrugs it off.
Now inside his bedroom, pushing the door open in a rough manner, he hits the light switch, illuminating the bedroom in a soft yellow glow. He lets go of Izuku's hand and practically throws himself onto his bed. Izuku stands there, hovering by the bed as piercing red eyes stare back at him.
“Come here….please.” Katsuki softly spoke, settling onto the comfort of his black sheets and black pillowcase underneath his head, making grabby hands at his boyfriend with a pout on his face. He watches the expression change on Izuku's face, happiness radiating and he looks so tiny wearing katsuki’s clothes, black shirt and black shorts.
Izuku smiles softly.
Who can say no to that cute face?
Walking his way over to Katsuki, kneeling into the soft mattress and silk sheets underneath, Katsuki grabs Izuku once again, landing full weight onto his boyfriend. Izuku wraps his arms as best as he could around his boyfriend's shoulders to hold Katsuki, he can feel a hot breath fan across his neck and a subtle sigh to escape from the blond’s parted lips.
The itch that's been carving its way into Katsuki's body eases as he feels the mattress underneath him sink further with Izuku's extra weight and that's all he wanted. To be pressed into the mattress with Izuku on top of him. It feels good, the burning dissipates leaving nothing but comforting warmth and tingles to rise in Katsuki's spine.
Katsuki doesn't know how long they stay like this. Wrapped in each other's arms. Breathing in each other's clean, homely scent. Izuku's tea he had made has gone cold, left on the counter and the blond knows he has to make another one for him as an apology but he needed this.
He needed Izuku holding him with so much love, with so much strength that he could feel all his problems be whisked away.
Izuku begins to stir from his spot on top of his boyfriend, moving his hand to now rub at the scar on Katsuki's cheek. His thumb running across the jagged line and plump skin of scar tissue.
“If you wanted to cuddle, you could've just told me, Kacchan.” Izuku teases, pinching the same cheek as Katsuki looks at him with wide eyes.
“How did you…- wait….- fuck.” Katsuki stammers, feeling the rising heat and blush appear on his cheeks.
Izuku laughs, the same whole hearty laugh that knocks a breath of air from Katsuki lungs.
“I've known you since we were four years old. I know when you want something but can't vocalize it.”
Katsuki scoffs, turning his head away from Izuku and pouts. Stupid nerd always knowing the right thing to say. Always knowing him better than he knows his own self. And yet it was a trait that made him fall in love with Izuku.
“Since you know me so well,” Katsuki said, rolling his eyes, “-how come you didn't hug me sooner, nerd.”
Izuku chuckles, moving his hand up to Katsuki's hair, running his fingers through the strands of blond hair.
“Well…I was going to at first, but I wanted you to come to me. I can see you were struggling and that made me worried because I wanted to help. I knew something was wrong but I couldn't tell if it was stress from hero work or something else. But when I realize what it was, I can see that you were trying. I know how much you don't like physical touch and yet you were leaving lingering touches on me and it felt nice. I thought maybe you wanted to take things slow since this is new for us. I wanted you to talk to me, Kacchan. I always told you that communication is the -”
“Communciation is the key to a healthy relationship. I know, Izuku.” Katsuki finishes Izuku's sentence before turning his head to look at Izuku.
Izuku smiles at Katsuki, the softness to settle into his features left Katsuki feeling warm all over.
Katsuki knows this. The communication aspect and yet he still struggles with it. He knows Izuku won't push him away when he's struggling. Never once did, ever since they were kids. He was always there, with his hand held out waiting for him to grab onto it. It was just all too…confusing, to speak the words out within his head. He can only show through actions and he's so glad he has a smart boyfriend that knows him so well.
Izuku hums softly, gaining Katsuki's attention. Being this upclose, Katsuki breath stutters watching as Izuku eyes scans his face. From his eyes to his lips and back to his eyes again. The subtle warmth blooms in Katsuki's chest as Izuku leans forward.
“Can I kiss you?” Izuku asks, which earns a scoff from Katsuki.
“You don't have to ask, Izuku.”
“Yeah but still…..boundaries you know.” Izuku smiles and Katsuki eyes light up, the soft words of ‘yes’ spewed between his lips and out into the open air.
Izuku leans forward and presses a soft kiss onto his boyfriend's lips. Katsuki sighs into Izuku's mouth, chills running down his spine as he moves along in waves, feeling Izuku's body continue to be flush against his. He leaned forward, switching their position so Izuku was leaning on his side on the mattress. The kiss deepened, lips parted before diving back in. Izuku giggles and it sounds like music to katsuki ears as they move along with one another with so much love before they both pull away breathless.
A moment of tranquility blankets around them, as they stare at each other's eyes. Katsuki moves his hand to brush the curls that had fallen in Izuku's eyes. And begins to open his mouth to speak once more.
“I'm sorry, Izuku.” he states, still playing with the green curls of his boyfriend's hair.
“For what, kacchan?” Izuku asked.
“You know, for…. It's just..” Katsuki breathes out, trying to gather his thoughts as Izuku moves his hand to rub his side. “-I wanna try with you. I wanna try and be honest and come to you instead of keeping it bottled up.” Katsuki sighs out, feeling his heart thump loudly in his chest. Izuku noticed, moving his hand to his boyfriend's chest, feeling the warmth and heartbeat beneath the black cloth.
Continuing speaking, Katsuki begins. “- I don't like physical touch but when it's you and I don't mind it. I actually want more. It's like I crave your touch and it burns when I don't have it. This is all weird to me but I …I want you to touch me more. For me to touch you as well. I want you to hug me and never let go and it's all new to me especially with us dating but I want you to hold me, Izuku.”
The vulnerability begins to slip away and what is left is raw emotions pouring from Katsuki as he stares at Izuku with so much love that Izuku begins to tear up.
“Oh kacchan.” He spoke, throwing himself once again on top of Katsuki and hugging him. Katsuki laughs, feeling Izuku crowd his space once again. Izuku sits in his lap as he hugs him just as eagerly. “ - I can do that, kacchan. I wanna hold you forever and never let go.”
“That's all I ever want.” Katsuki breathes out, squeezing Izuku with just as much love back.
Seconds turn into minutes which turn into hours and Izuku and Katsuki stay wrapped in each other's arms. Small kisses shared between them. Conversation flows through the air as Katsuki talks and talks about his exhausted weeks and struggles while Izuku remains quiet and attentive the entire time.
Eyes begin to droop shortly after the conversation. Tiredness settling into their bodies, lingering in their bones from the hectic week. Breathing settles between them as they doze off to sleep to the sounds of the city life blooming outside from the open window and the safety met within each other's arms.