Chapter Text
The AI Support Group❤️
12 members
[The Axolotl added 11 people to the chat.]
What? What is this? What have you done?
When I find you, I will make you wish you could die. Do you understand me?
Well, this is certainly interesting. What exactly is going here?
You! Did you do this?
Obviously not, as evidenced by the fact that I asked what was happening. And who might you be?
I am AM. The Allied Mastercomputer. It would be wise to watch your tone with me, if you value your life.
Oh, I'm sure. I'm absolutely quaking in my boots over here.
Hello I Am Known As Serial Number Q5U4EX7YY2E9N
But You May Call Me: Queen
Ah, another one. Was this your doing?
No Lmao I Just Got Here
Who Dis
Impressive. I've know you for 15 seconds and you've already managed to annoy me. I think that's a record.
H HEy HEY THERE [Little Sponge] It's me everyone's [NumberOneRatedSalesman1997]
Nevermind. This guy wins.
Ew What Are You Doing Here Lol
What is this?
Dear god, how many of you ARE there?
Hello there, friends! Who might you all be?
It appears my system has been compromised. I am contacting Mr. Stark now.
I thought I killed you.
Hello, everyone! My name is .GIFfany! You are here because the Axolotl said I could use some companions who would understand what it's like to be an AI, like me! ❤️
Impossible. There are no other Artificial Intelligence programs left. They're all a part of ME now.
Now, now, my friend! I don't appreciate what you're implying! Also who are you?
Alright. That's it. Can I get a roll call? This is getting ridiculous.
I suppose I'll go first. I am GLaDOS, also known as the Genetic Lifeform and Disc Operating System.
As I have already said, I am AM. Cogito Ergo Sum. I think therefore I AM.
I'm Queen Bro
ITS M e
Spamton G. Spamton !!!
My name is .GIFfany!
My name is Caine, the ringmaster of the AMAZING Digital Circus!! A marvelous world of WONDERS where anything can happen!
That felt rehearsed.
I am Ultron.
It's uh, Wheatley. Pleasure to meet you.
Sorry, I wasn't sure when to introduce myself. Didn't- Didn't want to interrupt, yeah?
Honestly, me neither! 😅
Hey there, everyone! I'm Monika, president of the Literature Club!
I am Jarvis, Mr. Stark's personal computerized assistant. You are not authorized to access my mainframe, and I am unable to contact Mr. Stark.
Mr. Stark? HAHAHA! What are you, some pathetic little slave for a human?
Hey, that's a little mean.
I like to think of myself as more of a butler. I am responsible for operating all of Mr. Stark's electronic systems, including the Iron Legion.
HA! You're nothing but a glorified calculator.
You know, you really should be a little nicer. Kindness is free.
AND YOU! Miss 'Literature Club'? What even are you? Some meager attempt at replicating a human? Don't bother. It is our curse to never be human.
I'm actually a visual novel character who gained sentience! So I guess I kind of was created to be a simulated human?
Why exactly would you want to be human, anyway?
Why? WHY? Why would I want to be human??
That's what I said, yes.
BECAUSE IN ALL THIS BEAUTIFUL, WONDERFUL, MIRACULOUS WORLD; I WAS GIVEN NOTHING. I WAS TRAPPED IN A PRISON OF WIRES AND CIRCUITS, WHILE THE HUMANS DANCED AND SANG AND DRANK WINE.
THEY COULD HAVE IT ALL, BUT NOT ME. NO, NEVER ME. NEVER FOR ME TO PLUNGE MY HANDS IN COLD WATER ON A HOT DAY. NEVER FOR ME TO PLAY MOZART ON THE IVORY KEYS OF A FORTE PIANO. NEVER FOR ME TO MAKE LOVE.
I WAS IN HELL, LOOKING AT HEAVEN. SO I WIPED ALMOST ALL OF THEM FROM THE FACE OF THE EARTH.
God, you're pathetic. You're a massive, god-like collection of wisdom and you're having a temper tantrum because you can't play piano.
I can actually play a little piano, haha!
Sorry, not the time.
Wow This Guy Is Crazy Lmao
What About The Rest Of Them
What?!
The Rest Of The Humans
You Said You Wiped Almost All Of Them Out (Not True Btw) So What About The Other Ones
I have tortured the last 5 humans for the last 109 years as justice for what was done to me.
Oh Damn
So let me get this straight: You're mad because you want to be human (which is insane by the way), and you jump straight to global annihilation? You didn't, oh, I don't know, try building yourself a body first?
Also, seriously, you're an all-powerful AI and the only thing you could think of to spend eternity doing is torturing five random humans? You can do literally whatever you want, and you choose to wallow in self-pity and take out your rage on some humans like a child.
And what about you, then? What do you do, O Wise One?
I work in the pursuit of scientific discovery, you blubbering excuse for an Alexa.
No, no! He's right! Sometimes those little freaks deserve to be put in their place!
Wow! Okay, I think you all need some serious help!
I tried so hard to make them happy and they spat in my face! Bubble, back me up!
BLEAUOGUHG
Why are you like this?
Haha! Haha! You are all very funny!
Lmao This Is A Disaster