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Kyungmin had no idea how they ended up here.
They received several days off, a mini-vacation following the new year, and they were celebrating. The members were sitting in a circle on their dorm living room floor, bottles of soju and beer scattered amongst various snacks between them.
Drinking was new to Kyungmin, but the pleasant fuzz in his head was nice. His hyungs were relaxed, bodies loose and unguarded. Their laughter filled the room: someone teasing, someone bickering.
Jihoon grabbed an empty bottle, his cheeks flushed. Kyungmin's eyes followed him as he stretched, revealing a tiny strip of his lean torso as his shirt rode up.
“I'm bored,” Jihoon said, eyes flashing mischievously. “We should play spin the bottle.”
Naturally, chaos followed.
In between Jihoon’s laughter and Youngjae’s attempts to rein the younger member back in, Dohoon’s loud “you just want to kiss me so badly,” only riled Jihoon up more. Kyungmin found himself laughing too, fascinated by the ways that Dohoon constantly tried to get Jihoon's attention.
Junghwan sighed, rubbing his forehead. “how come every time we drink together someone ends up making out…”
Kyungmin slowly turned to look at him, surprised.
Junghwan sat to Kyungmin’s side with his knees crossed, his beer–something bright and tangerine–loosely held in his hand. His cheeks were slightly pink, freckles uncovered and hair curling up at the ends.
Noticing Kyungmin's expression, Dohoon laughed. “You didn't know?”
Kyungmin shook his head, still reeling from the blasé way they were discussing making out with each other.
Hanjin turned to him. “Wait, Kyungmin… have you ever kissed someone before?”
Kyungmin blushed.
He doesn't have much experience with these things. He grew up busy, time divided evenly between trainee dorms and school, never really getting an opportunity to experiment with these things.
But he wants—
Secretly, sometimes, only at night, in the dark when everyone else is asleep—
The warm press of an arm, steadying his shoulder. The featherlike brush of hair on his face. The faint press of warm, soft lips against his own.
He remembers, and he lets himself want.
“Kyungmin?” Hanjin's voice startles him.
Back to the question at hand… Kyungmin’s answer should be an easy no, but his mind is stuck on that faint brush of lips, the stick of cookie, and Junghwan so close he could study each freckle, breath fanning across his face.
He knows what he should say. But the words that come out of his mouth are different. Worse.
“Did the Maejeomgayo pepero game count?” Kyungmin heard himself ask. The bemused expression on Youngjae’s face immediately made him feel a bit silly. There was a sudden noise to his side as Junghwan dropped something. “That?” his voice sounded oddly strangled.
Jihoon giggled at Kyungmin adoringly. “That absolutely does not count as a kiss. Come here Kyungmin-ie. I'll fix that, if you want,” he grinned; all mischief and love and warmth.
Kyungmin did want. Someone in the room laughed, but Kyungmin couldn't bring himself to look at anyone else, nodding at Jihoon.
Some concoction of impulse and bravery and longing spurred him into action. Kyungmin hadn't even had much to drink, but his head spun dizzily as he clambered over to Jihoon. Jihoon's grabby hands directed Kyungmin to sit, legs straddling one of Jihoon’s knees.
This close, Kyungmin found himself studying Jihoon's face. The bright glow of his smile, the tiny moles under his eye and by his mouth, the dusting of pink on his cheeks.
Jihoon’s warm hand was on his face. Kyungmin startled as Jihoon’s thumb carefully nudged Kyungmin’s lower lip out from between his teeth. He hadn't even noticed that he was worrying at it. Jihoon's expression softened, and he looked as though he were about to pause and ask Kyungmin if he was sure about this.
Before he could second guess himself, Kyungmin leaned forward. He placed a quick kiss on Jihoon's mouth before pulling back to gauge his reaction.
Jihoon beamed at him, eyes crinkled, muttering something under his breath that sounded like “cute” before reaching out and gently running a hand through Kyungmin’s hair, pulling him in.
Jihoon's lips were soft and warm, and Kyungmin's stomach fluttered with bright nerves. Thoughtlessly, his hands found their way to Jihoon's shoulders, and the feeling of the dense corded muscles under his shirt had Kyungmin gripping tightly. In response, Jihoon's hand tightened in his hair and Kyungmin gasped at the sensation.
Jihoon took advantage of the increased access to Kyungmin’s mouth. Kyungmin could hear the wet noises of their lips, and the mere thought of the others hearing it too made him feel like he was overheating.
Kissing Jihoon was dizzying, almost frantic. Jihoon pulled Kyungmin’s lower lip between his teeth, nipping at it in a way that made all of the thoughts slide right out of Kyungmin’s head.
A sudden hand on his shoulder startled him so badly that he jumped, knocking his teeth into Jihoon’s and causing them both to yelp.
“That's enough, that has to be a sufficient first kiss,” Dohoon giggled.
Kyungmin’s face burned red hot, lips still damp and tingling. Jihoon ran a hand down his back comfortingly before helping Kyungmin clamber off of him, back over to the spot he was sitting in earlier. Kyungmin resolutely avoided all eye contact as he got settled back in.
“Okay my turn now!” Dohoon grabbed the nearest empty bottle, some small glass one that smelled faintly of whiskey, and placed it on the floor in the center, spinning it eagerly.
The bottle slowed to a stop in front of Youngjae's folded legs. Kyungmin momentarily forgot about everything else as he watched the two of them stare at each other. They kind of resemble two wild animals, eyeing each other warily; trying to gauge the other's reaction without giving away their own feelings.
Kyungmin looked at Hanjin and saw the same curious fascination reflected in his eyes as he watched. He smiled, remembering the first time Hanjin approached him about it. Careful. Nervous. His hushed voice stumbling through the words as he asked if Kyungmin knew what was going on with those two–the history those two seem to have with each other.
Dohoon looked like he hadn't decided whether to attempt nonchalance, or to just get up and run. Youngjae's expression settled on something unreadable before he moved forward and tugged Dohoon towards him by his wrist.
Their lips met–and for a second it was hesitant–before some kind of muscle memory kicked in and Dohoon shuddered, melting into Youngjae’s grip. Dohoon's hands unconsciously moved to grasp at the front of Youngjae’s shirt. Youngjae’s free hand came up to Dohoon’s hair, scratching lightly at his scalp before he used his grip to pull Dohoon's head back.
Youngjae's expression softened at the barely audible whimper Dohoon let out, and he gently ran his hand over Dohoon's head before releasing him and scooting back to his spot.
Wordlessly, Junghwan handed Youngjae the bottle.
The bottle landed on Hanjin, and Kyungmin was honestly thankful for the break from the tense atmosphere that had developed. Hanjin leaned over and kissed Youngjae sweetly, his cheeks pink. Youngjae delicately pressed a final kiss to the corner of his mouth before pulling back to hand Hanjin the bottle. Dazed, Kyungmin watched as the bottle landed on Jihoon, who was almost vibrating out of his skin with excitement. Eagerly, Jihoon crawled towards Hanjin and kissed him on the mouth, all the boundless joy and love escaping his small body.
Kyungmin shouldn't have let himself become too comfortable, because when Jihoon next spun the bottle it came to a stop pointed squarely at Junghwan.
“Oh absolutely not” Jihoon squeaked, cheeks flushed as he crawled toward Junghwan. “He’s not my type. He's too old for me,” he complained loudly, clambering into his lap.
Junghwan had his signature Han Jihoon induced exasperated-yet-fond expression, as he lazily put his arms around Jihoon’s waist.
Jihoon looked Junghwan up and down, evaluating him from this new position. He smirked, before leaning in. Junghwan's hand made its way up to the nape of Jihoon's neck. Kyungmin's breath stopped. Junghwan's hand nearly spanned the entire column of Jihoon's neck.
Junghwan made a low noise, readjusting the angle so he had better access. He bit Jihoon’s lower lip sharply, almost meanly, and the quiet whimper that Jihoon let out made Kyungmin choke, overwhelmed. Jihoon pulled back, looking dazed, and Junghwan reassuringly petted his head.
Jihoon clumsily stumbled back to his spot, and Junghwan located the bottle. When Junghwan spun it, it landed on Dohoon.
Kyungmin felt a sense of impending doom.
Dohoon’s expression could best be described as “evil intent” as he made eye contact with Kyungmin over Junghwan’s broad shoulders.
Dohoon leaned in and kissed Junghwan like he was trying to prove something. It looked almost violent, Junghwan groaned as Dohoon's hands tightened in his hair and on his neck. Both of them were breathing heavily, and wet noises were filling the room. Kyungmin felt like his brain was being microwaved, heat filling his head. After what felt like hours, Dohoon knelt back. As their lips disconnected, a gossamer strand of saliva stretched out thin between them.
Junghwan looked really good. His hair was messy, lips kiss-bruised red, cheeks aflame. Dohoon giggled, spun the bottle, and grinned delightedly when it landed on Kyungmin. This had to be rigged somehow.
Dohoon moved toward Kyungmin playfully as Kyungmin braced himself.
Kyungmin could taste alcohol. Citrus. He jerked a little, electricity sparking his nervous system like he'd been shocked. Dohoon licked into his mouth, and the taste of Junghwan's tangerine beer followed. Kyungmin closed his eyes, and the noise he made was embarrassing. All of his thoughts had melted down into sticky syrup.
He heard a low noise from the room, and looked up, locking eyes with Junghwan. The intensity of Junghwan's gaze made Kyungmin shiver, a prey-like whine making its way out of his throat.
Dohoon smiled into the kiss, pleased. He pulled back, and rubbed his hands along Kyungmin’s arms, reassuring him. Dohoon started to go back to his spot, but tripped over Junghwan’s foot which was suddenly in his path.
Hazily, Kyungmin felt around the floor for the bottle. His mouth tingled with the echoes of tangerine beer, and his lips felt swollen. His fingers wrapped around the cold, smooth surface, and he spun it.
When the bottle landed on Youngjae, Kyungmin let out a sigh of relief. He looked over at Youngjae, eyes round and pleading, lips bruised. Youngjae moved towards him and cooed at him under his breath before carefully gathering him in his arms, guiding him to his lap. Kyungmin felt small nestled against Youngjae. Taken care of. Cherished.
Youngjae let him sit for a minute, savoring the momentary peace, not rushing him or pushing him. After steadying himself for a few breaths, Kyungmin leaned up and Youngjae gently met his lips.
Kissing Youngjae was the easiest yet. Youngjae held him securely, arms looped around his torso. The kiss was indulgent, Kyungmin melting syrupy soft into it, the tension from earlier unwinding. Youngjae let Kyungmin grasp at him blindly, bringing a hand around so he could hold Kyungmin’s hands in his.
When Youngjae disconnected their lips, he followed it with a few gentle kisses to Kyungmin’s cheeks and nose.
Kyungmin blushed, cheeks warm as Youngjae softly helped him back to his spot.
Youngjae worried his lower lip with his teeth as he spun the bottle again. Laughter filled the room at the enthusiastic cheer that Jihoon let out when the bottle came to a halt facing him. Jihoon practically threw himself onto Youngjae’s lap, before taking his head in his hands and kissing him square on the mouth. Youngjae let his hands wander
The two of them drifted into their own world. Hanjin looked a bit scandalized by the noises that the two were making as they kissed fervently. Kyungmin was beginning to wonder if he should still be watching this.
As Youngjae moved to mark Jihoon’s jaw, Jihoon let out an unintentionally lewd moan, which was the cue for the game to officially end. Hanjin got up to leave and Junghwan began to usher everyone else out of the room.
Kyungmin stumbled a bit as he got up, feeling like a foal on unsteady legs. His foot accidentally kicked a discarded can of what looked like tangerine beer that was on the floor. The can was crumpled almost beyond recognition.
He blinked a few times to steady himself, before following Hanjin down the hall toward their room to wait their turn to get ready for bed. Junghwan and Dohoon had already claimed first dibs on the bathrooms, so Kyungmin resigned himself to the 20 minute wait.
He felt a presence beside him suddenly, and squeaked as a large hand wrapped around his arm and pulled him into the bathroom, shutting the door.
Kyungmin knew who it was before he looked.
“Look at me,” Junghwan’s voice was low, strained.
Kyungmin turned to face him. Like this, he could see the flush high on Junghwan’s cheeks, the way his jaw was clenched slightly, his eyes searching Kyungmin’s face, taking note of his appearance. Kyungmin knew he looked like a mess. His red face, his swollen lips, the marks on his jaw and neck, the strands of hair ruffled chaotically.
“I didn't know that that was your first kiss. I was your first kiss. If you count the Maejeomgayo Pepero. Which I do. Count it, I mean.” Junghwan was talking quickly, frenzied.
“No one else seemed to count it,” Kyungmin mumbled. Junghwan's expression clouded. Suddenly, things started to click together in Kyungmin's head. “Wait. Are you jealous?”
Junghwan blinked. “No,” he replied quickly, casually. Too quickly and casually. His eyes hadn't left Kyungmin’s mouth.
“Are you sure?”
“No,” Junghwan replied. “Wait, yes.” He paused. “I'm not jealous.”
Kyungmin raised an eyebrow at him.
“Let me have this.”
Kyungmin laughed softly, “do you want another kiss? My fifth first kiss?”
Junghwan froze. Kyungmin stepped a tiny bit closer, reaching up to put his hands on his face.
He gently kissed Junghwan, which seemed to spur him into movement. Junghwan's hands came up to settle around Kyungmin’s head and collarbone, keeping him near. Kyungmin made a soft noise in his throat as Shinyu deepened the kiss, the bright tangerine stronger now than when he tasted it secondhand off Dohoon’s lips.
Junghwan kissed him differently. He kissed Kyungmin like he was the last remaining source of oxygen, holding him close. Kyungmin felt overwhelmed. It was better than any of his daydreams. Junghwan's hair brushed against his cheekbones, his hands were warm, splayed across him. His lips were soft, moving against Kyungmin's with practiced confidence.
Junghwan pulled back, visibly reining himself in. Kyungmin made a soft, displeased noise at the sudden loss of contact.
Junghwan rested his palm on Kyungmin’s face, cupping his cheek and running a thumb over his lips.
“It's late,” Junghwan whispered. “You should head to bed, you're going to be exhausted in the morning,”
Kyungmin nodded at him. “Hyung,” he started, “can you kiss me again tomorrow?”
Junghwan's expression softened. “Of course.”