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Gary missed his family. Of course he did! Seven days in a crate, and several more without a word between them.
It was risky, Gary knew. He shouldn’t have even been in Zootopia in the first place. But he had to try. He had to save his family from the isle most reptiles had fled to during the purge.
The weather was too unpredictable, the neighbors were not friendly. Most were reverting to their primitive, savage ways- if they hadn’t already.
That much stress on a person’s shoulders could do detrimental things to one’s mind. And if the fear was fed by others that had already lost control? Well… That was just more incentive to give Gary the final push to do what was right.
His family had begged him not to go. They had pleaded with him, telling him that they were fine- that they didn’t need more than the hole in the ground they occupied, or the dry, desert sun and sand they so craved.
Gary had to witness miserably as he and his family had been flooded out again and again by heavy rainfall. Every winter, Gary, his mom, dad and two siblings knotted themselves together so tightly they could hardly tell between themselves which scales belonged to who. Even then, they could just about survive the snow that still somehow found its way in around the “door” his father had attempted to block the entrance to their burrow.
It was a just a big honking rock.
The final straw was when they lost the newest clutch of eggs.
Gary had been so excited for his new siblings! His mom had warned him to be gentle, snapping at them all to keep their tails to themselves if they came too close. Gary did as he was told, and as such, he was the first besides his father to be able to approach the clutch- nestled beneath his mother’s protective coils. The heat of the sun beating down on the earth above was perfect for warming the home below, creating the perfect temperature.
Gary loved to visit them often, telling them silly stories and simply watching them grow and squirm about inside their squishy eggs with his heat vision.
Then tragedy struck…
Gary’s mom didn’t want to leave them.
It was a downpour. This one worse than any they’d ever had before. The burrow flooded completely- not even a pocket of air to be found. They couldn’t move the eggs in time, so Gary’s mom dutifully curled herself around them to futilely try and block out the freezing water. If not for his dad going in to pull her out, Gary knew his mom would have drowned as well as the delicate eggs she’d tried so hard to protect.
Gary’s mom barely ate anything for weeks afterward.
His dad was hardly any better. If it hadn’t been for Gary, the viper wasn’t sure where they would all be now.
Gary couldn’t lose anyone else. That was why he’d sent that letter to the Lynxley’s. What else could he have done?
Gary always knew himself to be different from his siblings. His sister had a cobra boyfriend that his parents were busy trying to keep their eye on, while his brother had taken a liking to the sweetest milk snake Gary had ever met.
He couldn’t deny it anymore. He just wasn’t interested in his own kind.
And then he met Pawbert.
Maybe it was the goofy way the lynx jabbered on, talking a mile a minute just to keep up with Gary’s own excitement. Or perhaps it was the way Pawbert’s fur brushed delightfully against Gary’s scales- so soft and warm like he could cuddle in and live there forever.
Or- and the very thought still makes Gary blush, even after everything- maybe it was the size of those paws as they wrapped themselves completely around the widest part of Gary’s slender body. The way they gently grasped Gary as he was bodily lifted by those thick, strong arms. Pawbert’s paw pads- though rough and scratchy- were strangely alluring, and Gary had often found himself pushing into Pawbert’s space just to feel them scrape across his scales when the lynx would push him back to arm’s length.
At the same time, Gary felt sick at the idea that he’d ever even thought Pawbert had felt the same toward him. Was there something he’d missed? Some hint or nudge that he’d ignored for favor of his own desires? It wasn’t fair…
And now the memories of those sensual paws were tainted with the cold knife of snow digging under his skin. It had happened so fast. One second, Judy and Pawbert were having a hug that made Gary proud (and equally as jealous), then the next, Pawbert had betrayed them all.
Still, Gary’s blush thickens, the snake covering his face beneath his favorite comforter in equal shame and desire.
Those paws had wrapped around Gary’s throat and squeezed. Gary had found himself completely helpless- trapped and held in a way that forced the snake to stare up at the one that had always captured Gary’s attention.
And Gary had liked it. He was incredibly lucky he had been so cold at the time, or else Pawbert would have absolutely seen just how much his rough touch ensnared the snake in itself.
Gary just wanted Pawbert to stop. He was never going to bite him! He just needed to wrap him up tightly enough so that he couldn’t move.
Then Pawbert grabbed him and all Gary’s thoughts unfortunately went out the window. Pawbert- though holding him by the throat at a safe distance- still pulled the rest of Gary closer. His touch was still as gentle and secure as it had always been, and Gary curses himself for falling for that trap.
Pawbert had been saying something, but Gary couldn’t hear it through the rush of arousal and childish hope that had made his head spin.
It didn’t matter in the end. A few seconds was all it took, and all the warmth and one-sided love Gary had gathered in those final moments were ripped away as he was maliciously dumped into a pile of snow to freeze to death.
Even then, Gary couldn’t find it in himself to hate the cat. He just felt lonely and disappointed- an aching hole opening up in the snake’s heart that had been so thoroughly sliced open by Pawbert’s flippant dismissal.
Oh, Gary had tried to find another a few times to try and take his mind off Pawbert, but no one had ever been enough. Other snakes, an otter, a handful of different big cats, and even a bobcat or two later, and… nothing.
Most wanted Gary for the novelty of it. Others only wanted him for their own twisted pleasure. Some wanted him as an ornament. A few genuinely would have been great! If it weren’t for the fact that Gary had to change everything he was to fit what they thought he should be.
Pawbert didn’t care. Pawbert had allowed Gary to be who he was without judgement- possibly because the lynx knew exactly what that felt like.
If only Pawbert knew just how much Gary was willing to give if the cat had just-!
No. Stop dwelling on it. You’ll only hurt yourself more. Gary’s inner voice chides.
“Gary? Are you alright, sweetie?” Gary flinches at his mother’s voice. When had she come into his room?!
“I’m fine, mom.” Gary answers. His voice cracks halfway through, which probably meant he wasn’t fine, but maybe he just had to ignore it harder.
The hole in Gary’s heart rips into a gaping maw.
“Sweetheart, you haven’t left your room in two days… We’re worried about you, baby.” His mom coos, her loving touch stroking along Gary’s back through the blanket to soothe him. All it did was remind him of the warmth of someone else- someone fluffy and warm and beautiful, just the way he was-.
Gary pulls away from his mother’s touch, choking back the sob clawing at his throat.
“I’m fine. I’ll come out later.” Gary appeases, doing his best to keep his words even so as not to worry her more.
Gary hears his mom sigh through the cover.
“Ok, sweetheart… If you need anything, you come get me. Yes, ma’am?” His mom offers.
“Yes, ma’am…” Gary parrots, curling himself into a tighter ball to try and preserve that distant warmth that was rapidly fading into the recesses of his mind. He nearly breaks when all he’s left with is an icy lump inside that stabbed at his chest like an icicle.
“Ok, baby… I love you.” The woman hums, her voice having moved further away. The door creaks as it’s slowly opened. She waits there for a moment, and Gary fights through the agony of his own despair to respond to her.
“I love you, too…” Gary scrapes out.
He’s not quick enough. The door had already squeaked shut minutes ago.