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English
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Part 9 of l’amour de ma vie
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Published:
2026-04-19
Updated:
2026-06-01
Words:
87,117
Chapters:
9/?
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128
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387
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6,067

so baby come light me up

Summary:

It started with smoke, and a voice that made the panic go quiet. A firefighter who carries her out of the flames — and goes back in for her kitten. She just wanted to rebuild. Find somewhere new. Keep her kitten and herself safe. She didn’t expect him. She didn’t expect any of this. But the best things don’t always ask for permission. And falling in love, as it turns out, is no exception.

— firefighter!sylus au

Notes:

I honestly don't know how to start this. so last week this came to me randomly while talking to my friends in the lads discord server I'm in. I've always wanted to write a firefighter au and the more I was brainstorming with my friends and thinking about it the more excited I got about this story. I've been brainstorming before even finishing chapter 18 - the extra birthday part for the sugar daddy/ceo!sylus au and I genuinely couldn't wait so I just started writing this fic haha. as of now this fic is not finished, but it will be! I decided to post the first chapter of the story already and share the others as I write. I've already written 2 chapters in 2 days. and as of right now I'm still writing chapter 3 (this one makes me very giddy). I genuinely cannot wait for you guys to read this 🥹 this story means so much to me and god.... sylus as a firefighter??? GOD DAMN!!! I am salivating. either way I never know how to write fic in a short format so enjoy another lengthy fic from me again! thank you and I hope y'all love it as much as I love writing it! 💘 title inspired by the song ‘into you’ by ariana grande. 🌙💖

this goes without saying, but if you don’t like it don’t read it <3

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: ‧₊˚ ☾. ⋅1 ⋆˙⟡♡

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

 

San Francisco in the late evening had a particular kind of quiet that you’d never quite managed to find anywhere else.

Not silence — the city was never truly silent — but a settling. The way the fog rolled in from the bay and softened the edges of everything: the streetlights blurring gold, the distant clang of a cable car, the muffled laughter spilling out of a restaurant as its last table of the night lingered over wine. The hills that had punished your calves every single morning for three years now felt, somehow, gentler at this hour. Like the city was breathing out.

You loved it. You loved it in the way you loved all quiet, unhurried things — deeply and without apology.

Your feet were protesting by the time you turned onto your street, the particular ache of someone who had been standing since four in the morning settling into your shoes with cheerful vengeance. There was flour somewhere in your hair that you’d given up trying to locate around hour eleven, and your apron — abandoned on its hook at Miel — had probably taken most of the day’s evidence with it, but your forearms still wore a fine dusting of it at the creases of your elbows, and there was a smear of raspberry coulis on the inside of your wrist that you’d missed in the wash-up.

You didn’t particularly mind.

Fourteen hours. A batch of croissants that had finally, finally cooperated after two failed attempts at laminating the dough. A birthday cake for a little girl named Sophie that had taken the better part of the afternoon and that you were quietly, fiercely proud of. A broken display stand, a near-miss with a tray of financiers, and Leah — your most senior employee and your closest best friend — singing along, off-key and without shame, to whatever was playing through the bakery speaker while she restocked the cases.

A good day, in other words. Tiring in the bone-deep way that only good days could be.

You climbed the front steps of your building, dug your keys from your bag, and let yourself in.

Mrs. Beaumont’s cats found you before you’d fully cleared the door.

“Hi, babies,” you said, dropping to a crouch in the entryway with the automatic ease of someone who had done this every evening for two weeks now. Mochi wound himself around your ankles, motor already running; Biscuit regarded you from across the room with the specific aristocratic skepticism he reserved for anyone who wasn’t his actual owner. And then, picking her way carefully across the floor in her soft, rolling wobble — each step considered, each small paw placed with a deliberateness that you found endlessly endearing — came Stella.

There she is,” you said softly.

She blinked up at you with her mismatched eyes, one pale blue and one gold, and you reached down and let her sniff your fingers before scooping her up, very gently, the way you always did. She was white as fresh cream and had a personality that could only be described as aggressively curious. She was so small. Even for five months old, she was so small, her legs a little shorter than they should have been, her whole compact body fitting neatly against your palm. The vet had explained the dwarfism with calm, clinical kindness, and Mrs. Beaumont had received the news with the equanimity of a woman who had seen everything and loved her cats regardless — but you, the first time Stella had wobbled across the floor toward you instead of away, had felt something shift very quietly in your chest and had not fully shifted it back.

You fed all three of them, tidied the water bowls, ate some left overs from last night and made yourself a cup of tea that you drank standing at the kitchen window watching the fog thicken over the rooftops.

Then you showered, changed into your softest pajamas, and sat on the sofa for approximately seven minutes before your body voted unanimously for unconsciousness.

The candle on the side table was still burning when you fell asleep.

It was vanilla-scented — a gift from your mother, sent in a box with a note that said for ambience, sweetheart, your apartment looks too sterile in photos. It needs to be cozier — and it threw a warm, amber light across the room that was genuinely lovely and that you’d fully intended to blow out after your tea.

You forgot.

And Stella, as it turned out, had been watching the flame with great interest for some time.

‧₊˚ ☾. ⋆˙⟡♡

You woke to the smoke alarm.

For a long, disoriented moment you simply lay there, blinking at the ceiling, your brain cycling slowly through the fog of deep sleep trying to locate the source of the sound. Fire alarm, it supplied eventually, with the unhurried authority of a thought that had not yet grasped the full weight of its own message. Fire alarm means—

The smell hit you.

You were off the sofa before you were fully conscious, your feet hitting the floor and your body moving on pure animal instinct while your mind scrambled to catch up. The living room was so wrong. The air was wrong, thick and grey at the edges, and the curtain was a tongue of orange that climbed the wall with terrifying enthusiasm, eating upward like it was hungry, like it had been waiting.

Your stomach dropped straight through the floor.

“Mochi,” you said, and then louder, sharper, your voice finding itself fast: “Mochi. Biscuit. Come here —”

The older cats were easier. Mochi, the fat tabby, came when called out of sheer automatic habit; Biscuit had already retreated to the bathroom at the far end of the hallway, which had the good sense to be away from the smoke. You scooped them both — one tucked under each arm, Mochi yowling his protest directly into your ear — and got them out into the corridor, setting them down near the stairwell where a neighbor already hovering in their doorway immediately stepped in.

“Is there anyone else—”

“Stella.” You were already turning back. “Small, white kitten, she can’t move fast, I have to—”

“You cannot go back in there—”

But your body was already making the decision.

You went back in.

The smoke hit you immediately — thicker than it had been thirty seconds ago, lower, meaner, the kind that got into your throat and stayed there. You dropped to a crouch and pulled your shirt up over your nose and it helped, barely, the cotton filtering almost nothing.

“Stella,” you called. Your voice came out wrong already, rougher than it should have been. “Stella, baby, where are you—”

Nothing. No small white shape. No wobbling little figure picking her way toward you.

You pressed further in, past the doorframe, staying low, your free hand trailing the wall. The heat from the living room was enormous now — a physical pressure against your face and arms, your skin prickling with it. Through the smoke you could see the glow of the fire painting the walls amber and orange, consuming the curtain completely, beginning to crawl across the ceiling.

“Stella.” Louder. Desperate. Your voice cracked on the second syllable and didn’t recover. “Please, please come out, please—”

The smoke found your lungs then. Really found them.

The cough started low and became immediately violent — your whole body seizing around it, your eyes flooding, the wall the only thing keeping you upright as your knees went uncertain beneath you. You couldn’t get a clean breath. Every inhale brought more of it, thick and chemical and hot, and your vision was starting to swim at the edges in a way that frightened you more than the fire did because you recognized it, distantly, as your body beginning to lose the argument.

“Stella—” The word dissolved into coughing again. You pressed your forehead against the wall, tried to breathe slow, tried to think. She was here. She had to be here. She was small and scared and she couldn’t run fast and you were not leaving without her, you were not

Your legs buckled.

You caught yourself on the doorframe with both hands, barely, your arms shaking with the effort of it. The smoke alarm was still screaming overhead. The glow from the living room was getting brighter. You were crouched in a burning hallway and you couldn’t stand up properly and you still couldn’t find her and the panic was enormous now, shapeless and roaring, drowning out everything else—

The hallway door burst open.

Boots on the floor. Radio crackling. And then a figure in full gear was moving through the smoke toward you with a speed that made no concession whatsoever to the conditions — not slowing, not hesitating, crossing the distance between you in seconds and dropping to his knees right beside you.

“Hey.” His voice came through the visor, low and immediate, and there was a quality to it that cut right through the roaring in your head — the kind of calm that simply existed, that didn’t negotiate with chaos, that arrived and took up all the space the panic had been using. His gloved hand came to your shoulder. “Hey. Look at me.”

You tried. Your eyes were streaming and your lungs were burning and your legs were still refusing to cooperate but you tried.

“The kitten—” It came out as barely a rasp. “She’s still in there, she can’t move fast, she has dwarfism, she hides low—”

“What does she look like.”

Not a question. A lifeline.

“White,” you managed, between coughs. “All white. One blue eye, one gold. Please, she’s so little, she doesn’t — she doesn’t understand—” Another cough tore through you, your whole body shaking with it, and this time your grip on the doorframe slipped completely.

He caught you before you hit the floor.

One arm beneath your knees, one at your back, and you were up — lifted clean and fully off the ground in one motion, tucked against his chest before you’d fully registered what was happening. You made a sound of protest that came out as more coughing, your hands gripping the front of his gear weakly, and he adjusted his hold without comment, his grip absolutely certain, the kind of secure that didn’t ask you how you felt about it.

“Wait—” you started, between shuddering breaths.

“I’ll get her,” he said. Flat. Unarguable. The most unshakeable four words you had ever heard. “But you’re coming out first.”

He was already moving. Long, even strides back down the hall, angling your face away from the worst of the smoke, shielding you with the bulk of his body. His hand came briefly to the back of your head, pressing your face into his shoulder, away from the air you couldn’t breathe — and the gesture was so deliberate, so careful, that something in your chest cracked quietly open alongside the panic.

The stairwell door. The stairs, fast. Another figure in gear passing you on the way up, voices coordinating above you, the building’s alarm still screaming.

And then the night air, cold and clean, flooding into your lungs like water into a dry riverbed.

You coughed through it, great gasping coughs, your whole body shuddering with relief and with the aftermath of the smoke. He carried you clear of the entrance before he set you down, slowly, carefully, on the front steps — one hand staying at your arm until he was sure your legs would hold. They held. Barely.

You looked up at him. The visor reflected the red and white of the trucks at the curb. His grip at your arm loosened, but didn’t disappear.

“Stay here,” he said.

Your throat was raw. You managed one word.

“Please.”

Just that. He understood it completely.

He held your gaze through the visor for a beat longer than necessary.

Then he turned, and walked back into the burning building without a moment’s hesitation.

‧₊˚ ☾. ⋆˙⟡♡

The next four minutes were the longest of your life.

You sat on the cold stone step in your pajamas — soft cotton shorts and a worn oversized tee that said MIEL across the chest in faded pink letters — with your arms wrapped around your knees and your eyes fixed on the door he’d disappeared through. The street outside was lit up red and white, two fire trucks angled at the curb, more figures in gear moving with that same particular controlled urgency. A paramedic appeared at your elbow and tried to get you to move further back, and you did, a little, just enough to technically comply, but you kept your eyes on the door.

Someone put a blanket around your shoulders. You didn’t feel it.

She’s so little, you thought, and the thought had a specific texture to it, a tightness behind your sternum that had nothing to do with the smoke you’d inhaled and everything to do with the image of Stella wobbling between pieces of furniture, her small uncertain gait, the way she always tilted her head at you when you called her name like she was giving the question serious consideration before committing to an answer.

Please, you thought at the door. Please.

And then he came out.

He came out the way he’d gone in — unhurried, deliberate — and cradled against his chest, small and white and very much alive, was Stella.

The sound you made was embarrassing. You were dimly aware of that even as you made it — a soft, undignified noise somewhere between a gasp and a sob — and then you were crossing the distance between you and him, the blanket falling off your shoulders, your arms already reaching.

“Oh,” you breathed. “Oh, thank you — thank you—”

Stella, characteristically, seemed unbothered. She was blinking at you with her mismatched eyes, her tiny white nose twitching, apparently of the opinion that being carried through a burning building by a large man in fireproof gear was simply another thing on the agenda of this evening.

“She was under the bathroom sink,” he said. “Second shelf.”

“Of course she was.” You laughed, wet and wobbly, pressing your face briefly against the top of Stella’s small head. “Of course. That’s her spot.”

And then — because it was over, because she was safe, because the adrenaline was finally metabolizing into something softer and more complicated — your eyes filled.

You blinked hard. Refused to cry in front of a stranger. Succeeded only partially.

When you looked up, he was taking off his helmet.

You weren’t prepared for that.

He was incredibly handsome.

That was the thought that arrived first, and it arrived without apology. Unreasonably, almost unfairly handsome — all clean sharp angles and a jawline that had no business existing on a person who had just walked out of a burning building, the silver hair falling loose from the helmet slightly damp at the temples, catching the red and white light of the trucks in a way that made it look almost luminous. And his eyes — red, a deep extraordinary red, like a garnet held up to a flame — found Stella immediately. Found you, specifically, with a directness that made the breath you’d only just recovered feel suddenly scarce again.

And he was tall. Considerably, almost unreasonably tall. With the helmet off and the bulk of the gear still on his shoulders, he had the kind of frame that made the space around him rearrange itself slightly, the kind that you registered not just visually but physically — a shift in the air, a gravitational awareness.

You became suddenly very aware that you were standing in the street at — you checked the clock on someone’s phone nearby — eleven forty-seven at night, in cotton pajama shorts, holding a small wobbly kitten, with tear tracks on your cheeks.

“Hi,” you said, which was perhaps the least adequate thing you had ever said in your life.

Something moved at the corner of his mouth. Not quite a smile. Something that looked more like someone who was trying to restrain himself from smirking with amusement.

“Hi,” he said.

“I—” You adjusted Stella against your chest. She began to purr, apparently delighted with herself. “Thank you. I mean it. I — she’s — thank you.” You were running out of words. You were running out of everything. “I don’t even know your name.”

He looked at you for a moment the way he had in the hallway — that brief, assessing pause that somehow managed to feel less like evaluation and more like attention.

“Sylus,” he said.

You nodded. Filed it somewhere careful. Somewhere you’d find it again.

“Thank you, Sylus,” you said softly.

He held your gaze for a beat longer than was strictly necessary.

Then one of his colleagues appeared at his shoulder — shorter, purple-haired, with the particular energy of someone who had noticed something and was actively enjoying it — and said something into his ear that made Sylus’s jaw shift in a way that looked very much like suppressed irritation.

Rafayel,” Sylus said, with the tone of someone pronouncing a sentence.

“I’m just saying,” the colleague said, and his grin was absolutely incorrigible, “you were in there a while for a—”

“Go check the perimeter.”

Rafayel looked at you, looked at Sylus, and looked extremely pleased with himself. “Right. Perimeter. Absolutely. Very important.” He backed away with the energy of a man who had already won something. “Take your time.”

You looked back at Sylus.

Sylus looked back at you with the expression of someone who had made peace with his colleagues being exactly who they were and had simply incorporated that peace into his daily existence.

“You should have the paramedics check you over,” he said. “Smoke inhalation.”

“I’m alright.”

“That’s for them to confirm.” He said it without inflection, but it landed less like a command and more like — something else. Something that sat just adjacent to concern and didn’t quite announce itself.

You nodded. Held Stella a little closer.

He put his helmet back on — the deliberate, practiced motion of it, the way his hands moved with the ease of long repetition — and then he paused, and for one suspended second he looked at you again over his shoulder.

“Keep her away from candles,” he said.

You laughed — a real one, surprised out of you.

“I will,” you said. “I really, really will.”

He turned away. Back toward the building, back toward the colleagues and the crackling radios and the controlled, purposeful world he occupied with such extraordinary ease.

You stood in the street in your pajamas with your kitten and watched him go and thought, with the particular clarity of a mind that has just been thoroughly rattled and is now reassembling itself:

Oh.

Oh, that’s going to be a problem.

‧₊˚ ☾. ⋆˙⟡♡

Stella purred against your chest, unconcerned.

The city moved around you, indifferent, the way it always did.

You looked at the door he’d walked back through.

You thought about red eyes finding yours through smoke-thick air. About a voice that made the panic subside for a little bit. About the way he’d said I’ll get her like it was the simplest thing — like it was simply the thing that needed to be done and therefore he would do it.

You pressed your face against the top of Stella’s head again.

“Don’t tell anyone,” you told her quietly.

She blinked her little eyes at you.

Said nothing.

Kept your secret.

‧₊˚ ☾. ⋆˙⟡♡

Notes:

MANNNN I love this story sm <3 will probably share chapter 2 tomorrow 💖