Archive of Our Own

Cecilia Curtis was the only child in her family named by her mother. 

Cece for short; She was also the youngest, which she admitted with consternation. She felt much more mature than her brother Ponyboy, who was brash and even Soda at times who was more restless. Darry and her were probably the closest as far as temperament.

Cece was ten when their parents died, and before she had generally been sweet and quick to smile; always a favorite of Darrel Sr., who would call for his little girl to hold her tight and tickle her mercilessly. After the accident, she became more pensive and withdrawn. She was now turning twelve and the change seemed to be permanent to her brothers, who were concerned but did not know what exactly to do. Girls were generally an enigma to them.

Ponyboy was in his own little head, while Soda and Darry would talk about her at length once the younger ones were in bed.

“Well, for one, I’m gonna have to give her the room. She's gettin’ too old to be sleeping with her brother.” Darry said, tapping the table absentmindedly.

Soda nodded and rubbed a tired hand over his face.

“Mom and Pop always said they would add on another room and now look at us. Crammed in here like sardines.” Then a thought occurred to him. “Where are you gonna sleep? With me and Pony?”

“Maybe I can find me one of them pull-out couches.” Sighed Darry.

The decision did not go over well with Cecilia. 

“No.” 

“What do ya mean, no?” Darry’s eyebrows came down like thunderclouds. He did not like being told no, especially since his mind was already made up. 

“I mean, no.” Her small arms crossed adamantly.

“Now listen here, Cece. You need your own room. You’re almost a woman.”

“You work too hard to be sleeping on the couch, Darry! I don't need my own room. Soda and Pony share!” The two boys in question watched the interaction warily from said couch, not knowing how to help. Their oldest brother looked flustered.

“It ain’t the same! You’ll understand when you are older.”

Cece still would not let up. 

“It's the biggest room! If it's about me being a girl, I can sleep on the floor or maybe I could…”

“The decision is made, Cece. I've told ya and now I’m tellin’ ya. Keep it up and I’ll whoop you.”

Pony and Soda stiffened at the threat. They had both been on the receiving end of one of Darry’s smackdowns, but their little sister hadn’t. She at most got warning swats from their parents, but nothing from Darry who was probably too soft with her. The oldest had not really needed to be firm with her until this new rebellious side of her started rearing it’s head.

To her own credit, Cece did not even flinch. Her eyes merely narrowed in what could be blatantly interpreted as defiance. 

Both middle brothers scrambled. Pony started jabbering away while grabbing her arm and leading her into the hallway to his and Sodapop’s room. Soda was on Darry duty to distract him, which was not hard once the boys started filing in. Two-Bit and Steve almost took off the screen door wrestling while Dally swaggered in after them. 

“Hey, Superman!” Two-Bit called from the floor where he was being pinned. “Got any breakfast?”

“Keith, if you break that door you’re gonna pay for it from your pockets and your hide.”

“Well Jesus, Darry. What’s got your ass this morning?” Steve questioned. Yanking him off of Two-Bit, Darry cuffed his head.

“You two. And if you want breakfast, you gotta help Soda. I have to go to work.”

“On the weekend?” Dally prompted from the couch. He already had the remote in one hand and a beer in the other. 

“One of the guys got hurt, and weekends are overtime. Keep these delinquents in line, will ya?” Darry pulled his work shirt over his wife-beater.

“You got it, boss.” Dally drawled, doing a half-ass salute. Rolling his eyes, Darry called into the house.

“Cecilia, that attitude better be gone by the time I get back.” Soda winced from the kitchen. “Bye, boys.”

Various versions of “Bye, Darry!” and “Bye, Superman!” were called after him as he left the house.

Cece had heard the call from inside the bedroom and glowered. She was perched on the bed as Ponyboy paced in front of her. Finally, he stopped and turned. 

“You got a death wish or somethin’?” 

“Well, no, but it’s not fair! Why do I get treated differently?” Cece demanded.

“Cause you’re a girl.” Ponyboy returned, waving his hands as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. 

“But Darry works so hard. He deserves to have his own room. Why can’t I sleep on the couch? Why do I get to be so special?” 

Her brother huffed at her insistence. 

“I guess Darry thinks that you need privacy now that you are older. That’s why you can’t sleep on the couch; and Soda and I already share so he's the odd one out.”

Cece seemed to take the time to process this.

“So we can’t share the bed anymore and I need privacy so I can't sleep on the couch, because I'm a girl and I’m almost twelve?” 

Ponyboy nodded as if this made perfect sense. 

“Okay. Whatever.”

“Are you gonna leave it alone now? Cause I don’t think you should push it anymore. He was plenty mad and you may be brave enough to be willing to risk a whooping, but I’m not brave enough to see it so...” The boy rubbed his neck. That seemed to take some wind out of Cece’s sails.

“You don’t seem to care any other time when he’s mad. You and the guys get it all the time.” 

“Yeah, but that’s different.” 

Cece rolled her eyes at that. Everything was different, apparently as far as she was concerned. 

Pony left before breakfast to go to the movies with Johnny; and Cece was stuck with the rest of the rowdy gang.

“Hey, Short-stack. What’d ya do to make Darry mad?” Two-Bit ruffled her hair, but she ignored him, brushing the hand off as she set the table. Sodapop explained the situation to the boys and all of them seemed to agree with her eldest brother’s reasoning as they dug into chocolate cake and scrambled eggs. 

The rest of the day, she was silent, reading and doing her chores. Dally found her on the porch swing and plopped down next to her hard enough to make the springs squeak. Pulling out a cigarette, he lit it and paused before speaking. 

“I know you want to help Muscles. He’s a good brother. He’s just tryna do what he thinks is right.”

“Well, I don't think it's right… or fair.”

“Life isn't fair, sugar.” He replied, breathing out a big puff of smoke. Cece rounded on him with a stormy look.

“You think I don’t know that?” Dally looked at her solemnly before blowing the smoke in her face, making her cough and break eye contact.

“You’re cruising for it, little Curtis and I won't be able to stop Darry when you catch it.”

Cece brushed imaginary crumbs off of her overalls for something to do. She wasn’t stupid enough to not have a healthy wariness of Dally. 

“I can handle myself. And haven’t you heard? I’m not little anymore.” 

Dally grinned and patted her head. She groaned at the action.

“You’ll always be little to me, little Curtis. No matter how grumpy you get.” 

That provoked a small smile from her and Dally felt proud to see it, although he would never say so. He, just like the others, worried about Cece. “C’mon. Lets go steal the TV from Two-Bit and drink all of his Cokes.” 

And they did just that until Darry got home. They had a full house with all the boys and Sodapop was telling them about a customer always putting peanuts in his Cokes. He thought it was disgusting; but Two-Bit crowed that he had tried it and it was delicious, making obnoxious slurping noises.

“No one is going to believe you. People could serve you garbage and you would still eat it.” Cece jibed, leaning away from the loud boy. Everyone laughed and Two-Bit made a fake scoffing noise. 

“You little brat. C’mere and fight me.” Two-Bit quickly grabbed her foot and dragged her off the couch. Cece squealed as he pounced to tickle her. Darry walked in on the scene and smiled tiredly. Finally having enough, Cece laughed as she punched Two-Bit hard in the arm. The boy immediately stopped even though it probably did not hurt very much.

“Superman, your sister punched me.”

“Good. You probably deserved it.” Darry huffed as he set his lunchbox on the table, going into the kitchen for some leftover dinner. Cece took the opportunity to send Two-Bit a shit-eating grin and stick out her tongue. “Cece, go take your bath first. You both have school in the morning and I have to do your hair.” 

“Aww, do I have to wash my hair?” Cece had soft, brown hair like her brothers but hers was longer and easily caught in tangles. It took forever to wash it so she avoided it at all costs. Darry leaned out in the doorway to give her an unimpressed look. This was a fight they had for several months now. Simply snapping his fingers, he pointed down the hallway. In Darry talk that translated into Now, before I come get you.

She sighed and emerged from the bathroom freshly clean and with her hairbrush. She decided to take pity on herself and give Sodapop the brush instead of Darry. Darry was as gentle at brushing as he could be, but he was still too heavy handed. Smiling softly at being the chosen one, Soda urged her to fetch her hair ties.

“That way I can braid it and it will last a couple of days.”

Starting from the bottom, Sodapop began to work the tangles out and Cece managed to only wince a couple of times. Darry sent Ponyboy to get ready and the whole scene felt very calm and domestic. It had been almost a year and a half since their parents had died and it felt like they were finally getting some semblance of normalcy back. 

“Ow.” Cece complained as Soda started sectioning the pieces. “I wish my hair wasn’t so long.” 

“It’s too pretty to cut, honey.” Sodapop soothed. 

“Who cares if it’s pretty? It's not very practical and it gets in the way.” She grumbled, although she could admit that now that it was brushed, it felt nice to have someone touch her hair.

“You’ll care about being pretty when you're older and then you’ll look at pictures of your short hair and cry that we let you cut it.” Her brother assured. If anyone was an expert on girls, it would be Sodapop. He finished the braids with a flourish and a quick kiss on the head. “All done, say goodnight to everyone and get on to bed.”

“Goodnight.” Most of the boys said without even looking away from the TV. Some weird black and white horror movie about a blob was on and they were glued to the screen. Darry held out his arms for a hug and Cece went willingly into them. He pulled her into his lap for a moment.

“I love you, squirt.” Sighing, she laid her head on his broad chest. 

“I love you too. Even though you’re hard headed.” His chest shook with laughter, causing her head to bounce.

“That must be where you get it from.” She hummed non-committedly.

The room felt empty when she entered it, even though Darry’s stuff was still all technically in there. Laying down in the big bed made her feel lonely and a bit scared. She had never slept by herself before. She had shared a bed with Darry or her parents for as long as she remembered. There must have been a crib at some point but it was gone with the memories of it; and now it was just her. The thought brought tears to her eyes and they unwillingly escaped. Burying her face in the pillow, Cece was comforted by Darry’s smell still lingering in the fabric. 

She had to weigh her options and after crying for a bit, she began to formulate a plan. There may be casualties, but anything was better than this feeling of being alone again.

So, Darry slept on the couch for the next three days. Cece could tell that he did not get much sleep those nights and his back was hurting, but he never once complained. Ponyboy was oblivious as usual, but Soda had noticed too. Cece caught his eye over the table, but he shook his head as if to say ‘dont say anything. This is a problem for the adults.’. That didn’t satisfy her. Everyday after school she would scan her neighbor’s yard and trash piles and Mrs. Tremble two blocks down gave her money for babysitting her kids for a date night. 

Cece did everything she could to avoid going to bed. She hated sleeping in that room and would wake up still exhausted. Both her and Darry, being sleep deprived, were at each other’s throats.

Finally, she flat out refused to go to her bed.

“Time for bed, Cece.” Soda had called from the porch. The boys pulled a card table out there and were smoking and playing poker. Technically, she guessed, she obeyed. At the prompt, she simply walked over the couch and pulled the blanket on top of her. Darry was sitting in the chair and glanced over at her.

“Soda said it’s time for bed. Getting going, squirt.”

“I am in bed.” She turned to face the couch and hopefully avoid his ire. No such luck.

“Your bed.” Her brother’s voice raised a fraction, enough to make the boys outside notice.

“We can take turns. It’s my night to sleep on the couch.”

“If your little butt is not off that couch by the time I count to three, it will be in danger.” Darry promised. Cece could almost picture him with his thick index finger pointed at her, but she did not turn around to see it.

“One.” The only movement came from outside as the boys pretended like they weren’t listening. Although it was a bit foolish thinking, Cece hoped that their presence would make Darry think twice before smacking her. It had never helped anyone else.

“Two.” She tried not to visibly tense. Sodapop fought his way through the onlookers to the door and positioned himself inside.

“Darry.” 

“Not now, little buddy.”

“But Dar…” The eldest brother ignored him.

“Three.” Silence hung in the air, which was eerie because their house was never quiet. Cece heard quick footsteps; and she barely had time to brace herself before the blanket was pulled off. Darry grabbed her arm surprisingly gentle before lifting her off the ground and bringing his other hand down to crack three times over the seat of her hand-me-down boy’s pajamas. 

It was like the shot heard round the world. Darry set her down on her feet in front of him and Sodapop gathered her to his side. The swats shocked her more than hurt. Her second eldest brother was distraught enough for her. 

“Honey, are you ok?” Soda acted as if he were checking for wounds and he probably would have if they did not have company. “Darry! She’s just a baby!” 

Darry pointed emphatically at Cece. 

“She is not a baby; and if she is, she’s the mouthiest one I’ve ever seen.” He turned to look at her sternly. “Are you ready to listen?” 

“She’s going, Dar.” Soda started pushing her in the direction of the hallway, but Cece planted her feet. It was too late to back down now, and those swats hadn’t hurt all the bad. She was standing for her principles. Mustering the courage, Cece looked her oldest, and most volatile, brother in the eye and spat out.

“No.”

Skidding of the chairs outside commenced almost immediately as Two-Bit and Steve were quick to make their rushed ‘goodbyes’ and ‘see ya tomorrow, boys’. Grabbing a doe-eyed Johnny on the way, Two-Bit promised to take him home to his place for the night. Dally just rubbed a hand over his face, while Pony was hunched over the table.

“Alright then.” Darry conceded, and the world spun for Cece once more as he grabbed her again to pull her to him. “Soda, go to your room and take Pone with you.”

Sodapop seemed at a loss of what to do. He crossed his arms and eased himself down on the couch. 

“No, no I’m okay. I'll stay.” Darry just looked at him for a moment before ignoring him to sit down again on the recliner. He maintained a firm grip on Cece and her mind was racing. Did Soda stay because he thought Darry would be too hard on her? Or did he stay for moral support? Either way she wished the three boys would clear out the way the others did. 

Darry pulled her in between his legs and landed a hard swat on the side of her hip.

“You, missy, are gonna learn to stop telling me no and start mindin’ me.” 

Cece could not help but argue. 

“But Darry, I just said we could take turns that’s all.” 

“And I said no. That should be enough for you, but you always push it too far.” Crossing her arms, she gave a Darry-like scowl.

“You always boss me around. You never listen to me!” 

Darry would have loved nothing more than to yell back. His temper had only gotten worse with time and circumstances; but he learned the hard way with Ponyboy that he should not let it get the best of him. Taking a deep breath, he had to remind himself that he was the adult, he was in control, and this was his baby sister who was invoking his ire. 

“Because I am the boss, Cecilia. Until you turn eighteen and probably even after.” Cece made a face at that and started to speak, but Darry cut her off. “Now, I’m gonna spank you. Your attitude is getting out of control and it stops now.”

Despite her previous courage, those words made a nervous flutter in her stomach and she started to pull away from her brother, but Darry held on. The tiredness in his eyes grew more pronounced as she began to struggle. 

“I love you, and I coulda gone my whole life without doing this; but I can’t let you run wild. You’ve earned it.”

And with that he pulled her bodily over his left knee and pinned her legs with his massive ones. Letting out a mortified squeak, Cece closed her eyes and willed herself to be anywhere else. 

She had obviously seen her brothers get whooped multiple times, even Darry on the rare occasion when she was younger. The gang too had met Darry’s wrath a few times, but it was a different feeling altogether being the target of a spanking. 

Humiliation rolled over her like hot waves as Darry placed a giant, gentle hand on her back to keep her in place.

Then the other descended on her bottom with a clap. 

She had not thought too much in this potential vein of her plans. In fact, she had actively avoided it. Knowing something and actually experiencing it were two different things. Would she have changed her course, if she had known how much it would hurt? No. But did that make it any less painful? Not a bit. 

There was no thought spent on being stoic to save her brothers the heartache.

“Ow!” She tried to kick, but there was nowhere to go. “Darry!”

“I know, honey. I’m sorry.” Darry replied, simply as he laid down a couple more hard smacks. He had been holding back earlier with his warning. 

Cecilia drummed her feet against the floor in an effort to soothe the sting.

“Jesus Christ.” Gritting her teeth, she swore quietly, feeling out of her depth at the moment. Apparently it was heard over the next round of swats, although she could not fathom how when her ears were ringing.

“Cecilia Curtis.” Darry tagged her thigh in admonishment. “I don’t ever wanna hear you say that again or I will wash out your mouth. It's not his fault you ended up here.”

There was a barely contained snort from the porch and Cece assumed it was Dally. Only he would find their exchange funny. Ponyboy was probably crying and despite her best efforts she might be joining him soon. Her too-big pajama pants were pulled down briskly. 

“Lay still! You are fightin’ like a rat. You’re almost as bad as Two-Bit.” Darry said exasperatedly. Being compared to Two-Bit embarrassed her a little, she always thought he was so dramatic trying to throw himself off Darry’s lap or yelling so loud that the whole house could hear. She resolved to be nicer to the older boy. 

Her last resort was to throw her hand back to fend off the next round of swats, but her hand was eclipsed in Darry’s big paw and held at the small of her back. A sob built in her throat as the fire reached a boiling point on her poor defenseless bottom. Darry chose this time to lecture.

“Are you ready to listen, young lady?” If Cece wasn't so distraught, she would have rolled her eyes. She thought the question was rhetorical until a sharper,punctuated smack landed to catch her attention. 

“Yes!..Yes, Darry.”

“What got you here?”

“Ah! Ow.” Cecilia wished Darry would stop talking. Surely, he was never this chatty with anyone else. “I had an attitude.” The oldest brother gave her a short reprieve to catch her breath, for which she was semi-grateful.

“Does that happen often?” The last lingering part of Cece’s rebellion sprung up at the question and she refused to respond. Darry immediately clocked it and resumed the assault on her bottom. The small break seemed to have made the situation worse. Cece let out a dejected wail. 

Outside, Dally swore under his breath and pushed back his chair sharply. 

“I can’t do this anymore.” And with that Dally shoved his hands in his pockets and sauntered in the direction of Buck’s. Ponyboy was bear-hugging his knees with his head down.

“Yes!” Cece finally broke out. Tears started to cloud her vision and her throat ached. 

Darry felt like shit making his little sister cry, but he knew it was necessary. She was too stubborn and he needed to make an impression. Looking down on the small underwear-clad bottom in front of him, he took stock. There was some red peeking out, but the color did not look concerning. Theoretically, he knew he was not smacking too hard and tried to angle his hand to mostly sting. Darry definitely knew he would have swatted the boys harder at this age, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. 

Glancing quickly up at Sodapop, who he had avoided until now, he saw his younger brother glare at him with a fiery look in his eyes; which was in no way undermined by the tears that were falling down his cheeks. Darry sighed and focused his attention back to Cece. 

“You have been pushin’ me at every turn and I have given you plenty of warnings. I’m not tryin’ to be a bully, Cece. Everything I do is for you and your best interest. You know that?” 

“Y…Yes.” Cece answered and she meant it. Of course, Darry wasn’t trying to be a tyrant. He was doing what he thought he should. Which was dumb… but she would not say that out loud.

“Are you done with the attitude? Are you going to sleep in your own bed and not put up a fuss about it?”

“Yes, Darry.” She was crying softly, now exhausted.

“Alright, we're almost done. We need to make sure. Cause I don’t want to have you over my lap again, do ya hear?” Cece should have known that wasn't the end of it. Darry always did finishing swats by however old they were. Before she could protest, he lifted his left knee up a bit to target her sit-spots. Planting her hands on the carpeted floor, Cece cried louder.

“I’m sorry! I'm sorry! I won’t do it again.” The swats were effective but quick and she soon found herself yanked right-side up. Her head spun as Darry realized that he pulled her up too fast and apologized. Briskly pulling her pajama pants back up, he held her head in his big hands; and began to pull her to him, when she was snatched up by Soda. 

Sodapop lifted her in his arms like he used to when she was very little and laid her head on his shoulder. Cece’s head was still wonky as she cried into his shirt. Her bottom stung like hell. 

“I know, honey. It’s alright, I’ve got you.” He murmured into her hair and swayed back and forth. Ponyboy made his way through the screen door, and all three brothers looked at each other. Soda was glaring daggers at Darry, who looked utterly lost, his hands listless at his sides. Ponyboy had obviously been crying as well. It was like one of those old westerns where three sides were in a standoff, waiting for the others to go for their guns. A muffled voice broke the tension. 

“I want Darryyyy.” Cece had not whined for her brother since she was six. Eyebrows screwing up in confusion, Soda needed clarification.

“What, honey?” 

“I want Darry to hold me.”

“You want… Darry?” Both Soda and Ponyboy looked flummoxed. If they had thought for more than a minute, they would have admitted that they also desperately wanted Darry after a hard spanking; but they were still mad at him for getting onto her in the first place. 

“Uh..” Her crying made her breath hitch, “Huh. Please.” 

Darry shyly reached his big arms out for her and Soda relented. Soon, Cece was eclipsed by a solid presence that made her feel safe. Darry smoothed her hair down and shushed her as he rocked in the recliner. 

“I love you, Cece. It nearly killed me to do that.” 

She buried her head further in his chest before apologizing. 

“I’m sorry.”

“I know, baby. It’s alright.” Fresh tears fell from her eyes. She desperately wanted to admit to Darry why she was fighting so hard. I get so lonely. I miss you. But the words would not come out.  “Pony, give your sister a hug and tell her goodnight. Your brother and I need to talk.” 

Ponyboy walked to the chair and she turned into him. He smelled like cigarettes and leather. Not for the first time, she was reminded that her decisions did not just affect her. 

“I'm sorry, Ponyboy.” Cece said quietly. He chuffed out a laugh.

“Well Glory Cece, don’t say sorry to me. Just don’t do it again. I don't think I can take it.” 

“You holler way louder than I did.” Her scowl was less effective with her wet eyes. Pony finally smiled.

“That may be. But no one cares if I’m hollering.” Giving Soda and Darry a quiet ‘goodnight’, Pony finally skulked to his room. 

Darry pulled her close to him again and pulled up the blanket. It was awfully cozy, but the tension in the room was not. Her eyelids grew heavy anyways. Her oldest brother breaking the silence made her jump awake slightly, but he rubbed her arm to soothe her. 

“You got something to say to me, little buddy?”

“You were too hard on her, Dar.” Soda asserted firmly, and Cece distantly thought this was the maddest her middle brother had ever sounded. 

“Sodapop Curtis, you know that’s a lie. She honestly probably deserved more…” Soda must have made a face at that because Darry started to point his finger again. “Fine, you can do it. I'm sick of being the bad cop all the time, Soda. You think I asked for this? Next time, I get to be the hero who swoops in after without doing what needs to be done.”

Soda obviously had nothing to say to that so he crossed his arms and nearly pouted. 

“I'm not saying that I want that, Darry. I know you’re doin’ the best you can, but surely you could have grounded her instead.”  That made Darry laugh. 

“What would you have done if Pony had spit no in your face like that?”

“I would’ve skinned him, Dar, but it's different. She's a girl.” Darry finally had enough.

“Oh good God, Soda. She’s a Curtis and she’s fine. Come look.” 

Cece was already asleep when the blanket was moved and her pants and underwear were pulled down in a flash. She whined a bit in protest. Soda had gotten a good look and was a bit sheepish. 

“Look, little buddy. I know you care and you are a really big help, but sometimes you have to trust me or at least be on my side.”

“I’m always on your side!” Soda insisted. “I hardly ever say anything. It was just this one time, because she's my baby sister and it was hard to see her get in trouble.”

“I know, it was for me too but she doesn’t exactly help her case.” Darry smiled and Soda laughed. 

“No kiddin’, my heart nearly dropped in my ass when I saw that look on her face.”

The two brothers talked for a while to settle themselves down from the chaotic night. Darry held onto Cece until finally around midnight, he laid her down in her bed. She snuggled comfortably into the covers and mumbled a ‘love you’ that made his heart squeeze. 

“I love you too, squirt.”