Chapter Text
When I first met Lyla she was like an angel sent down from heaven just for me, I truly believed that. She found me when I was alone and shaking and reached out a hand to me, backlit by a glowing light that gently dusted her skin, I could see the wings that sprouted from her back when no one else could, everyone else passed me by other than her, she was mine and she saved me.
It was raining that day, my heart was cold, the wind blew water onto the train platform, I curled up against a pillar with my hands blocking my face, breaths coming out ragged and uneven, I closed my eyes, the waves of panic threatening to drown me. It was not uncommon to be consumed, incoherence escaping in whispers between my gasps, no amount of air felt enough, nothing felt enough, my chest was tight, I was crying before I knew it. My thoughts pooled and spooled out of my brain, spinning into strings that looped around my neck, fear gripped me and refused to let go.
All around me were the thudding and clacking of footsteps, passing by and moving past me, it wasn't their problem that I was crouched on the floor, they had places to go and people to meet and simply didn't have the time to spare on someone they didn't know, my ears were water-clogged with these crushing sounds that trampled all over me and nausea surged up, a rising tide, but there was nothing to throw up, I dry heaved into my hands.
Somewhere in this turbulent sea a small but clear ripple was formed, a finger tapped my shoulder and I opened my eyes to shoes that stopped in front of me, red mary janes with delicate ribbons and wooden platform heels, I looked up and was met with a girl with blonde hair and golden eyes, a ray of sunlight that cut through the ocean and pulled me out. “Are you okay?” She reached out a gloved hand towards me, white with lace trim, and I took a full breath for the first time, it felt like I was born again, my tears stopped flowing, my head breaking through the water surface.
“Yeah. Thank you.” I managed to get the words out as I took her hand and got up, “I should… um… my train… ” Wiping my tear-stricken face with my sleeves, I turned and forced myself into the crowd until I was out of her sight. But I still looked at her, watching as she stood there staring at the space that I had occupied until the train came, watching as she boarded the train, watching as it left. Dazed and dizzy, I reached the gantry and tapped out, outside, the rain was letting up.
Slowly, I broke into a run, stumbling up the stairs out of the station and into the drizzle that was left, my shoes fell into puddles and my wet socks grew cold but I was no longer shivering, I laughed even when cars horned at me because all I could see was the girl with hair so bright it shone, how her headdress sat on top of her curled hair like a halo, how she looked so sweet in her lolita dress tiered with red and white frills decorated with strawberry print, how she held her parasol with elegant gloved hands, I pulled up all of the details that I could remember because I had finally found it, my perfect savior.
I knew that I had to see her again, even if it was just from afar I had to find her, I started to camp at the train station from opening to closing, sitting in the corner until I was questioned and chased out but I still slunk back in every time, kept awake and free from boredom at the thought of seeing that head of white-gold hair, imagining how her slender fingers would feel on my skin, such thoughts made me keep going back even as the days passed.
The next weekend came seven days later and so did she, exiting the gantry some time in the morning, only a few people away from where I was, happiness relief and excitement tasted so sweet on my tongue as I stared at her walking in front of me, I took in her body with feral eyes, baby blue dress atop a poofy petticoat, long white stockings covered her pale skin, she was wearing blue heels today and there was a slight bounce in her step, I wondered where she was going and shook out my numb legs as I got up.
I followed behind her as she walked, taking whatever shortcuts I knew to avoid her from catching on, even along those empty alleyways where I couldn't see her I knew that she was still in my reach, fate brought us together and I braided our threads in my dreams, I'm never going to let her go.
She stopped in front of a storefront displaying gorgeous lolita dresses and pushed open the door, the bell jingled in welcome as she went in. I stood a little ways off, the reflection of my black clothes out of place but even still I had to see her, thinking about what clothes she would be looking at and what accessories would catch her attention was enough to make that bell jingle too. My makeup was done and my hair was straightened, even if my clothes stuck out in the store she would see me at my prettiest.
And suddenly she was right in front of me, face inches away from mine, big golden eyes and equally golden lashes, there was a smile on her lips, playful and happy and like she couldn't hold it in any longer, I couldn't think or see anything else, I thought I would fall apart. She opened her mouth “Boo.”