Chapter Text
“Boq!” Nessa called, searching the storm for the newly tin man. Something cast a shadow over her, and she looked up to see a house, falling directly toward her. She screamed, and everything went black.
When she woke up, she was back in her room. Was the past day a dream? It had felt 100% real, but she was uninjured, so a dream was the only plausible explanation. She was so distracted by her own thoughts as she got into her chair and left her room that she hadn’t noticed the room looked like it did before her father died.
One of her servants passed by and she caught her attention. “Do you know where Boq is?” Nessa asked, hoping she would say he was in one of the various rooms in the manor, or that she can’t be expected to keep track of the location of everyone who resided here at all times. Anything that proved the previous day hadn’t really happened, because if it had, certainly rumor would have spread by now.
“Who’s Boq?”
“Boq Woodsman? The awkwardly adorable servant that works with you?” Well, he had been less awkward lately, and more.. Sad? Resigned?
“I’m sorry Miss Nessarose, but I don’t know who you’re talking about.” And with that the servant walked away. Miss Nessarose? No one had called her that for a long while now, to most people she was Madame Governor. She hurried towards the main area of the mansion, only barely stopping in time before hitting someone. Her father? No. It couldn’t be, could it?
“Careful darling,” her father’s unmistakable voice said. “What has you in such a rush?”
“Well, I-” she didn’t know what to think, much less say. Since inheriting the role of governor she had gotten fairly good at negotiations and declarations. But all of that training and practice went out the window the second she saw her father.
“Ohh, I get it. You’re excited to start school.”
“Yes. School.”
“I know Shiz is relatively far away, but I’ll make sure they take special care to look out for you. First days are hard, but if anyone can do it, it’s you.” First day at Shiz?
“Mmhmm. Excuse me, Father, I need to use the restroom,” she told him, and zoomed down the hall.
She closed the door and pivoted to face the mirror. Her hair was longer than it had been yesterday, her face younger, with far less lines and exhaustion.
She splashed cold water on her face and pinched herself, both feeling quite real. She time traveled? She wracked her brain for a minute, trying to figure out how she had done such a thing. There was a tornado, maybe it had been a sort of time warped tornado? Or maybe this was Elphaba’s doing, and Nessa had somehow been pulled back with her? The chime of a clock put an end to her brainstorming session. She finished getting ready, with the knowledge that she was back to her first day at Shiz.
“Are you ready to go?” Her father asked when she got to the living area. She nodded.
The Governor- it was nice for that title to be about someone else- sat across from Elphaba and Nessa in their carriage.
Nessa looked over at her sister. Like Nessa, she looked younger and less worn down. She hadn’t yet gotten her hands on that horrendible book that ruined everything. Her reputation, the monkeys, Father, Boq… Maybe she could stop her sister from becoming The Wicked Witch. Maybe that’s why she was here, in this time. Perhaps if she were to stop Elphaba from her descent, it could fix everything! Father wouldn’t die of shame, Nessa wouldn’t have to be Governor so soon, Boq wouldn’t be some sort of freaky metal thing- Boq. Recently it was evident he didn’t want to be around her, but this was before. Like she had wished just yesterday, she would be back at Shiz, where she had a whole group of friends! Who liked hanging out with her. Who weren’t too important for her in the emerald city, or an enemy of the state, or physically there but emotionally drifting further and further out of reach…
She had to be careful. There were some things that had to stay the same, like Elphaba being placed with Glinda, because otherwise there would be no group. Nessa sighed when she realized she would have to leave most of the first day the same- as much as she wants to stop Elphaba from embarrassing her in front of the school, for example, Elphaba most likely wouldn’t even be able to stay at the school if she fixed it. Unless…
“Father?” she asked.
“Yes darling?”
“I was thinking, and… I think I would be more comfortable being so far away from home if Elphaba were to stay and look after me.” She sent a slight smile to Elphaba, who was trying and failing to hide her surprise. Their father had a similar expression as he started speaking.
“You want her to stay around and be seen with you?”
“You wouldn’t have to look after any children, and I would have a familiar face. I hate to be alone.” This had always been true, but was now more true than ever. She had been abandoned before and she would do whatever she could to prevent it from happening a second time.
“You’re a lovely girl, I’m sure you’ll make many friends.”
“None that know me so well. Please?” He thought it through for a second, but crumbled easily.
“Of course. Anything for my Rose.”
“Thank you.”
When they got to Shiz, Frexspar got out first, to talk to the school about a last minute enrollment, and instructed Elphaba to help Nessa out of the carriage and into her chair, although all Nessa really needed was for Elphaba to bring her chair close enough for her to transfer herself.
“Are you sure that you want me to stay here with you? I know you wanted this to be a fresh start, and I’m not sure people here will like me any better than back in Munchkinland.”
“I need you,” she said, a little bit of the resentment she had towards Elphaba for leaving her slipping into her tone. And she did. Without Elphaba, she wouldn’t be able to get those days back, the ones she had wanted to be more than a distant memory so badly. The Ozdust, the picnics, the study sessions, so much of it was dependent on their little group, the five of them who, at one point, seemed to be inseparable. Elphaba was herself, obviously. She became friends with Glinda, who brought along Fiyero and had convinced Boq to ask Nessa to the Ozdust.
“Okay,” Elphaba agreed, giving Nessa’s hand a squeeze. The Thropp sisters walked toward where the opening ceremony was to take place, flitting through the crowd of people. Elphaba trailed behind Nessa, trying not to draw attention to herself. It didn’t quite work and everyone stepped away. Glinda made a comment about how she could fix Elphaba when she became a sorceress, and Elphaba shut her down.
Her thoughts blocked out most of the opening ceremony, and she knew the teachers and procedures at Shiz already anyway. She snapped back to attention when everyone stood up to applaud, completely obstructing her view of the stage. She looked over to her left, and there stood Boq with a bewildered expression, and then he shrugged at her. She shrugged back, and a smile broke out on her face. She hadn’t seen him in much of a good mood for months now, and he never interacted with her unless he had to. It had been so painful, slowly losing his companionship, because his was the only companionship she had left. Without it, she was just a lonely governor with a wicked sister and a disability. (Nessa had had to work extra hard to prove to the doubtors that competency as governor had nothing to do with one’s legs, even though that line of thinking didn’t really make any sense).
When the ceremony was over, she made her way over to him. “Great stuff going on up there while we were all standing,” she joked.
Boq laughed. “I’m Boq. From Munchkinland, but I suppose that’s obvious. I know it has a reputation of being sort of backwoodsy, but it’s really quite beautiful there.”
“The tulips are lovely, aren’t they? I’m from Munchkinland too.”
“Oh, that’s great! Well, it’s nice to meet you-” he cut himself off when he realized he didn’t know her name.
“Nessarose. But just call me Nessa.”
“I told you to call me Nessa, remember?”
“-Governor?”
“What?” She snapped, a bit too harshly, only her title processing when his voice shook her from her thoughts. She was afraid he somehow knew who she was after all this, all that had really happened.
He deflated a bit at her tone, not sure what he said wrong. “Sorry.”
Nessa took a second to calm down so she could be reasonable. “No, uh– what did you say? I must have spaced.”
“Oh, I asked if you’re the daughter of the governor? I think that your name sounds familiar.”
“Yes, he’s my father.”
Governor first, Nessa second.
“That doesn’t matter here, though. Here I’m just Nessa.”
The first time she was at Shiz, she was proud to be the daughter of the Governor. She had brought it up quite frequently, in fact. Now she wanted to be separate from the title for a while, wanted to be able to just be herself. Although if she were to be quite honest, she wasn’t sure exactly who she was anymore. When being forced to choose between taking away basic rights from Animals and everyone believing she was siding with her perfidious sister, it was impossible to make a good choice.
Nessa started to only really feel like herself around Boq, but he didn’t want to be around not-quite-her and she lost that too. She managed to keep him around, but it ended up causing him to forcefully remind her that he no longer saw the old Nessa either, and that’s when she felt like a different person completely, someone she didn’t recognize when she looked at the mirror or heard herself speak. She hated what she saw, what she heard, but every time she tried to make it better it came out poisoned by it and made what she saw and heard worse, worse, worse, like a nightmare she couldn’t escape.
She no longer thought of her family with pride when she heard the title, just the nightmare of her life.
“Just Nessa,” she repeated, not really for Boq to hear, but it was loud enough he did.
“Are you okay? You look kind of freaked,” Boq asked, concerned.
“Yes, I was just remembering a bad dream I had. I’m alright,” she reassured him with a smile that was half forced, half genuine.
“Dorm assignments are up,” Elphaba said from behind her.
Nessa moved slightly so she could see both her sister and Boq. “Elphaba, this is Boq. Boq, this is my sister Elphaba.”
“Nice to meet you,” Boq said, shaking Elphaba’s hand. “I’ll see you around.”
“Making friends already?” Elphaba asked lightly once Boq was out of earshot.
“Yeah, I think so.”
“I can’t say I’m surprised.”
“Oh, right, the second daughter,” the headmaster exclaimed as she walked over. “I’m sure we’ll find somewhere to hide- house you.”
“I’m going to go find my dorm,” Nessa stated. “Elphaba, maybe you could come with me to help me get settled in, and then we can come back, hopefully they’ll have found you a dorm, and we can do the same for you?” Elphaba nodded and they started to walk away.
“Don’t be silly, I’ll take you there myself,” the headmaster insisted.
“No, my sister- hey!” The woman ignored Nessa’s protests and started pushing her. She argued, trying to prevent what occurred the first time, but she didn’t listen. Like people always had before she was appointed governor, the headmaster was treating her like some sort of expensive doll that belonged to her father. Important, fragile, not a real person. And oh no, Elphaba was arguing on her behalf, which means-
She let out an involuntary yelp as she was propelled into the air. “Put me down!” -before Morrible sees you and gives you lessons, she finished in her head. Elphaba complied and Nessa looked around at all of the shocked faces. And then, to her dismay, Madame Morrible came out and took credit for the incident, stating she was demonstrating unpredictability at Shiz. Morrible asked Elphaba to meet with her privately, and Nessa sighed. She tried to change things, but the lessons are starting, and she’s on track to learn magic, get invited to the Emerald City, and steal the Grimmirie, giving her the ability to terrioze Oz and cause all of Nessa’s issues. What does she have to do to actually change things?
She slipped away before the headmistress could turn her attention back to her, and found her room.