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"Grace have mate, question?" Rocky asked. He rapped his knuckles against the xenonite glass as he asked the question. I found that habit of his quite endearing by now.
"No. I mean, I did, but she thought I had my head in the clouds, and I didn’t really want to live in the real world." I turned to Rocky with a smile that didn't reach my eyes, "She's right." I nodded along with my words. "Anyway, now she’s with Mark." I raised my hands in defeat, letting out a soft sigh.
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When it comes to my love life, I'm certainly not the protagonist of a cheesy romance novel written by a female novelist. I'm merely a background character who provides useful clues and helps the main character achieve his goal of finding true love. I was never meant to be the center of attention. However, there are times when I do get a brief moment in the spotlight.
Somehow, my conversation with Rocky reminds me of those moments.
Here I am, light-years away from other humans, and hearing that my alien friend is getting more action than I am. It's actually kind of funny.
I felt a memory tug at me from the depths of my mind, and my heart led me to a door of memories. I was in Stratt's Vat, sitting near the bar...
I sat there, watching Ilyukhina drag a reluctant Yáo to her karaoke session. They were singing "Wind of Change" by the band Scorpions, a good choice, I thought. I could see Yáo wanting to leave, but he kept on singing. He seemed to be having a great time. Everyone was drinking, laughing, playing, flirting, hooking up... oh, look, DuBois and Shapiro were being bold, having the courage to show their affection in public. Of course, everyone already knew they were together now, after their little confession to me during the Astrophage science lesson, their little quips thrown at each other, and the way they looked into each other's eyes.
It was like that movie quote,
“The eyes, Chico, never lie.”
And that's true.
They stared at me for a moment, bashful smiles on their faces. I raised my bottle and looked away. Everyone was in the room, except for a few officers and others who weren't party-goers. I only noticed one very important person missing: Stratt.
I'd assumed she wasn't the type to party or celebrate, and this party was actually being held to boost morale and celebrate the imminent launch of the Hail Mary crew into space, and well, the general success of our research on Astrophage. We all needed some entertainment from the dull routine we’ve gotten accustomed to.
I got up from my seat and grabbed my cardigan, then asked the officer standing by the door if he had seen Stratt. He told me where she had gone, and I went above the deck to meet her.
I found Stratt leaning against the iron railing of the ship's side, her hair gently blowing in the wind, like a mysterious character in an action movie considering her next move.
Mysterious, that's the word I'd use to describe her.
Even after months of being by her side, I've never really understood who she is or what she's like. Would it be wrong to say I'm starting to like her?
I wonder if she even considers me a friend.
We chatted a bit before I returned to the party.
Now hunched over the bar and reading the paper in my hand, I remembered the fact I'd just learned that Stratt used to sing in a youth choir before being distracted by the sweet voice coming from the karaoke microphone.
I turned my head to look. Stratt was standing there, holding a microphone. She was singing. She was singing!
Her voice was soft, almost haunting, and utterly beautiful. Our eyes met, and I smiled warmly at her. Stratt was showing a side of herself no one had ever seen before.
The warmth she'd kept hidden beneath her cold, calculating exterior was now on display. Everyone seemed shocked and speechless, not expecting the familiar Eva Stratt to reveal such a side. It was truly refreshing and unreal.
She left the room after singing as quickly as she had come. I couldn't help but feel my heart beat faster, and my face flushed as she glanced at me one last time before disappearing beyond the doorway.
Hmm, I think I'm starting to like her.
After a while, the party began to die down. I chugged the last of my drink and tossed away the bottle. I walked out of the room and hung around a storage room, watching everyone leave. I waved goodbye to Ilyukhina, who was giggling with the other crew members.
She always has a glint in her eye whenever she's about to play a prank on someone. I'm not sure who her next victim will be, but I hope it's not me.
I saw Stratt talking to Yáo and waved at them. Yáo then walked with Stratt over to where I was standing while they were talking. I wanted to take the opportunity to compliment her singing, but unfortunately, the next few seconds turned into a blur of me trying to keep my balance and trying to catch Stratt in my arms.
We were pushed into the storage room where I was standing, and the door was locked, so we couldn't get out.
"Hahaha! Come on, Grace! Tell her how you feel!!" I heard Ilyukhina laughing out loud behind the door.
I fell onto my back. My arms wrapped around Stratt. It was the first time I'd ever been this close to her. My heart started pounding. I'd softened the blow for her, but now I was in pain because I was taking the hit for both of us. Ouch.
"Guys, come on!!" I shouted. I helped Stratt to her feet. She looked stunned, her eyes wide and her lips pressed together.
"Thank you, Dr. Grace," she said as I helped her stand.
She smoothed out her pants and fixed her sweater, then stood by the door. "Ilyukhina, this isn't funny. Please let us out right now."
I could hear various kinds of giggles coming from the other side, then a loud thud.
"You too, boss! You two seem to need a little push to get together, and I'm what they call, uh... a little cupid!" she said.
Oh my gosh, they're setting us up.
I think she might have been drunk, because she felt confident enough to lock us both inside, and to tick Stratt off. This wasn't a one-man job, er, well, a one-woman job. She must have had comrades in this.
"Commander Yáo? I know you're there," Stratt called. "If you're not conspiring with Ilyukhina, you will let us out."
There was no answer, except for the sound of footsteps echoing down the hall.
Finally, Yáo spoke. "I'm afraid I can't answer that." Wow, he was in on the joke, too? This was quite an accomplishment.
I stood up and adjusted my glasses, then neatly put back the papers that had fallen out of my pocket when we fell on the floor.
"Looks like they won't let us out until one of us does something," I added.
Stratt turned to look at me. Her face was relaxed now, but she was still shocked by the whole thing. We were now locked in a room together, and we were only supposed to be let out if we… I don't know, verbally confessed our love?
She took a deep breath and sighed, crossing her arms over her chest.
"I don't know what they want from me, and I hope you're not part of whatever is going on, Dr. Grace?"
She ended her sentence with a sharp tone, and I swallowed hard.
"Heck no! This has got to be the worst way to confess feelings to! Besides, I got more important paperwork that needs to be settled, and we have a world to save." I replied, waving my hands to declare my innocence of the whole ordeal.
Stratt nodded. "Good answer, Dr. Grace."
We were standing in a cramped storage room. It was small, but not too small. The fact that I landed on my back as a 6-foot-something guy meant we had plenty of room to stretch.
I took off my hat and started fanning myself with the brim, as it was starting to get too hot in the room.
"Dang, they're really committed to the bit, huh? It's getting hot in here." I said.
Stratt leaned her back against the door, her arms still crossed and her eyes fixed on the floor. A murmur of agreement escaped her lips.
"So, uh, I really like your singing, by the way. You have a beautiful voice. The song is perfect, too." I scratched the back of my head, my eyes meeting Stratt's once again, and I felt my heartbeat quicken.
"Thank you. I did tell you that I used to sing in the choir."
"Where did you learn about that song?"
"I heard it from some scientists. I thought I'd try singing it for the party."
We tried to continue the conversation, but things were getting a bit awkward between us.
Might as well address the elephant in the room.
"Umm, they've started talking about us, you know. You and me, the boss, and the second-in-command," I began.
I felt like I was sweating bullets by bringing up the topic, and Stratt can be quite intimidating at times. I hope I'm not jeopardizing my position as the leading Astrophage scientist by discussing this, because it's not going to be fun--
"Yes, I've heard. I'm not here to entertain them and the gossip circulating among us, so it doesn't bother me at all. They can speculate all they want, but I won't let it get in the way of our work," he said.
At least she knows.
“Oh, hahaha, I think that’s pretty funny, but also not. You know? They’re spreading rumors that we’re secretly dating and that we’ve been sleeping together, isn’t that ridiculous?” I chuckled.
I saw the expression on Stratt's face. There was an emotion I couldn't read in her expression. I felt nervous and averted my gaze to the wall.
"Well, it's up to them," Stratt said. "After all, they can only spread rumors without witnessing what's really going on," she continued.
“Eh—” I was stunned. Stratt raised her index finger to her lips, silencing me. She slowly closed the distance between us until she was standing directly in front of me. Her right hand was combing through my hair, and her left hand found its way to the back of my neck. I was so taken aback by the situation that I didn’t realize her lips were so close to mine.
“Permission to kiss you, Dr. Grace.” A whisper escaped her mouth, so quiet that only I could hear.
I nodded slowly and closed my eyes. I felt her lips meet mine. They were warm, domineering, and I could taste the sweetness of her lip balm. I hadn't even noticed she was wearing lip balm. Stratt wasn't the type to wear makeup.
My hands seemed to have a mind of their own, and I wrapped my arms around her to kiss her deeper. I held my breath to stifle a moan from escaping my mouth, but the kiss felt so good.
It was the most intimate touch that I always missed after my last breakup, the human touch I was craving for so long, and I was getting it from someone I liked. Maybe I'm exaggerating, but after the stress of trying to solve the Astrophage problem, this was just what we needed to ease our minds.
I felt Stratt slowly pull away and separate from me. I stood there, stunned, as I had just kissed Eva Stratt, the head of the Petrova Taskforce, currently the most powerful woman on the world. I run my lips with my fingers. Her warmth still lingered on me. My eyes met hers. There was a soft look in them, a look I'd hardly ever seen before. I smiled, the same smile you get when the person you like turns out to have liked you back. I felt like I was floating.
Stratt smiled at me, then her expression changed to its usual one: a serious, cold expression.
She knocked on the door and said, “I have to go to the bathroom. Please open the door.” The door slowly opened. That was easy.
I saw Ilyukhina, Yáo, and several crew members standing near the opening. They stepped aside as Stratt walked out. She stopped in her steps, turned her head to face them, and said, “I can’t believe you guys had the nerve to lock me in like that, never again.”
I walked towards the door. Everyone was waiting eagerly to hear what was happening inside the small room.
“So, how was it, Grace? Did you guys make out?” Ilyukhina asked. Everyone giggled at her words.
I sighed and took off my glasses. “Nothing happened in there. Stratt stood there silently by the door, and I became silent after her face fell. It made me feel bad.” I shrugged and stepped out of the small, damp-smelling closet and headed for my room.
I could faintly hear the remarks that Ilyukhina's plan had failed miserably, but they would never know that it had actually worked, and there were no witnesses to Stratt and me kissing passionately. I smiled to myself, feeling that maybe, just maybe, everything would be okay.
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“Grace? Grace?”
I fluttered my eyes a few times before slowly opening them. I was still sitting on the lab floor, a pen tucked behind my ear, my body leaning against a soft surface. I stretched, turning to look at Rocky, who was tapping on the xenonite glass to get my attention.
“Grace is exhausted. Rocky watched Grace fall asleep,” he said.
“Oh, I’m sorry, buddy. I think I need to take a break.” I walked towards the dormitory with Rocky nimbly following me through the tunnel.
“Okay, I’ll watch Grace sleep while I work,” Rocky continued.
“Mhm, whatever you want, buddy.”
I wonder, was that really a memory, or a desire that turned into a dream of a memory?