Work Text:
it was a peaceful day aboard my ship the SS (as in kiss fan not nazi dw) moist soggy bread (so tasty). the waters were calm, the fish were straight up flyin! nothing could go wrong!
suddenly (rather quickly) i (me) spot (to see) a (non possessive verb/noun) ship (water [hydrogen dioxide] based vessel) on the horizon (the edge of the world) flying the Quaker Oats cereal flag. i could feel my heart clench, it was the ship of Cap'n crunch. we had a deep history (wink wink nudge nudge m/m type stuff [shoulder deep fisting]). we were once enemys and then lover and then now are enemies once more after he refused to use a condom even though he was HIV positive. (i don't like aids [ sorry not sorry {not homophobic}]). his vessel was getting far to close for me to ignore the call of his booty (rump). he had a rather dry skin complexion that got better with milk.
i called out to his vessel "Ye be prepared for boarding! i vill take your ship m/m style! totally ao3!" (and i prepared my ass [anus/anal cavity] and penis [genital] for gay sex)
"no please! don't take me over reader! we should not cross paths again! i can't take your deep style of penetration and your ability to take large object up your scrumptious rump!" this was a lie from the capn he secretly really wanted the reader to take over his vessle and get all ao3 on him. (m/m [gay]).
you knew deep down he secretely wanted you to board his vessel. as his plea for safety kept goin your anal sphincter tightened and leak fluid (cereal milk [you are an omega]). you put down the plank to board his ship and prepare your sword and rope for him.
"please oh please! spare me! i can not take your 3.26 inch penile up my sphincter!" said the capn to you.
you threaten him with you sword and motion towards a nearby barrel "go on you slutty pig capn! you know what happens now!" he knew exactly what that meant. it was time for him to take it up the rump.
"please reader its my first time (clear lie you had had his first second third fourth fifth sixth and seventh time)!". you knew that you had to force him over the barrel and tie him up for both of your pleasure to be at maximum.
as the boat swayed you tie up capn crunch and bend him over the barrel of cereal on his boat and prepare to enter his anal cavity aids be damned! you needed him it had been months since you last had the capn.
"prepare ye booty for mein cock!" you say to the capn' as you thrust in your 3.26 inch peener in his tight cereal hole/bowl. you moan as your peener goes in (obviously the capn is known for his pleasurable and amazing anal cavity.)
"ah- oh my- your so under average reader! i can't believe how great this feels but it hurts a bit if you go too fast!" said the capn clearly begging for you to be rough with him.
"too bad capn! im gonna be real rough!" you say as you slap his butt cheeks while going even deeper and faster, you could tell he erm liked it?
the capn's pleasurable anus made you inch closer and closer
"ooooooooooooo im gonna arrive in your anal cavity soon capn!" you said
"no please i can't take your dribble of 1 spoonful worth of cum!" said the capn begging for you.
you came in his little cereal hole with you wiener..........
which now that you think of is kind of gay... so you immediately flip the capn over and start riding his significantly larger and wet schlong!
"oh my! you are riding me with your butt!" said the capn feeling great pleasure as you ride his 4.55367 inch penis.
"yeah take that you cereal mascot!" you say to him demeaning him in an attempt to make him cum quick.
the capn starts tensing his thighs and moaning louder alongside his rapidly increasing breathes
"OH MY GOODNESS! prepare reader! im about to ejaculate out of my wiener! into your poop schute!" the capn said
you continued riding him just as hard making sure he would arrive very quickly
"give me your cap'n cum!" you say to him
he ejaculates in your anus. kinda gay but a bit less simpy.