Work Text:
Santos had believed from the very beginning that reporting a relationship to HR was one of the most absurd things humanity had ever invented.
Even more absurd than resident work-hour limits that absolutely nobody followed anyway.
"This is insane," she muttered as she walked down the hallway beside Garcia. "We are literally going to sign a document that says: yes, we regularly have sex after work hours, please put it into the system."
"Garcia didn’t even look at her. She walked with quick, confident strides, typing something quickly on her phone..
"It’s hospital policy."
"Hospital policy can kiss my ass."
"Santos."
"What? I’m speaking professionally."
Garcia sighed heavily, but Santos caught the hint of amusement in the corner of her mouth. Just a tiny movement. Barely visible.
Eventually they reached the HR office. A plaque hung on the door:
Human Resources
Employee Support and Conflict Resolution
Santos stopped in front of it and read the sign with genuine disgust.
"Sounds like a place where dreams go to die."
"Sounds like a place where you’ll receive another official warning if we don’t report this."
Santos regularly received patient complaints about her bedside manner. Never about her competence, though.
"We don’t have to do this!"
"You kissed me on the stairs yesterday and Dana saw it!"
"Well it's not my fault, she's fucking everywhere! Besides she would never come to the HR with this."
Garcia gave her a pointed look.
"What about next time when someone sees it and actually has a problem with us?"
"They can’t fire me. I’m adorable. You literally said so yesterday."
Garcia let out a quiet snort and opened the door.
Two women sat behind the desk.
One older, around sixty, with short gray hair and glasses slipping down the end of her nose.
The other younger, maybe in her thirties, with red hair and blue eyes.
Both looked up.
And neither looked even remotely surprised.
Santos noticed it immediately.
Apparently Garcia did too, because her step slowed just slightly.
"Dr. Garcia. Dr. Santos," the older woman said calmly. She stood from the desk, walked to a large shelving unit stacked with piles of forms, grabbed one, that says on the top 'HR-204 Form: Interpersonal Relationship Disclosure' and sat back down. "So it is true after all."
Garcia frowned.
"...Excuse me?"
The younger woman smiled broadly.
"Oh, the entire hospital has been gossiping for months." She handed them the correct form before either of them had even explained why they were there.
Santos burst out laughing like someone who had just received the greatest entertainment of the week.
Garcia looked like someone had informed her of a nuclear disaster.
"What?"
"Even the head of dermatology came by recently," the older woman continued with obvious amusement. "She asked if it was true that the famous Yolanda Garcia was sleeping with an ER resident."
Santos nearly choked on her own saliva.
"Dermatology seriously has too much free time."
The younger woman giggled.
Garcia stood perfectly still. Her jaw clenched tight like a surgeon trying to regain control of a situation spiraling away from her.
"I thought… we were discreet," she whispered to Santos.
Trinity looked at her with genuine amusement.
"I told you, everyone knew."
Both women looked at Garcia with something bordering on sympathy and fascination.
"Dr. Garcia," the older woman said gently. "Dr. Santos has basically been living in the surgical gallery for months."
"She waited after night shifts until your surgeries were over," the younger one added.
"You brought her coffee down to the ER."
"Dr. Santos arrives at work in your car when you’re off-duty."
Santos turned her head, trying unsuccessfully to hide her smile.
Garcia looked like she wanted to die.
"How do you know all this if you sit behind a desk all day?" Garcia asked dryly.
"Oh please, Dr. Garcia. We have eyes everywhere."
"And apparently an excellent view of the parking lot." Santos burst out laughing and glanced toward the window beside the long desk where the two women were sitting.
Yeah.
From there, they had a perfect view of the hospital parking lot. "I love this day."
Garcia shot her a betrayed look.
"Not another word."
Garcia looked down at the form.
Standard disclosure of an interpersonal relationship between employees of the same hospital.
"Please fill in your information, positions, and sign the declaration," they were instructed.
Naturally, Garcia sat down immediately and began filling out the paperwork.
Santos dropped lazily into the chair beside her, the complete opposite of Garcia’s rigidly straight posture.
"I feel like I’m signing an act of surrender."
"It’s just a form."
"A form that basically says: yes, I’m a lovesick idiot who kisses Dr. Garcia regularly."
Garcia stopped writing for one second.
Only one second.
But Santos noticed.
The younger woman noticed too and smiled even wider.
Garcia resumed filling out the paperwork with even greater concentration.
"We hereby declare that we are in a romantic relationship..." Santos read theatrically. "God, this sounds like a police report."
"It’s a legal document."
"Can we write ‘hopelessly in love’ instead?"
"No."
"'Regularly flirting'?"
"Santos."
"Fine."
Trinity continued reading:
"The relationship does not negatively impact the quality of our work or the maintenance of professionalism toward patients and coworkers..."
Santos looked at her with amusement.
"That’s funny considering you threatened a patient last week that you’d reduce his morphine dosage because he stared at me too long."
"He was staring at your cleavage."
Which was true.
Santos had been running late that day and hadn’t had time to change into scrubs before Abbott called her to evaluate a trauma patient brought in by ambulance. The tight black shirt absolutely had not helped the situation.
"The guy was completely high."
"He still had functioning eyes."
Santos raised an eyebrow.
"You told him if he didn’t stop staring, you’d amputate his hands."
"I wouldn’t actually do it."
"He believed you."
"I can be convincing."
"And apparently very unprofessional." Santos pointed directly at Garcia while addressing the women behind the desk. "See? This is what love looks like among surgeons."
The younger woman snorted with laughter.
Garcia clenched her jaw and resumed writing with the dignity of a dying monarch.
Meanwhile, the brunette leaned slightly closer to Santos.
"So... who made the first move?" She whispered.
"Oh, definitely not her."
Garcia closed her eyes.
"So it was you after all?"
"I can hear you, you know." Garcia warned.
Santos grinned broadly.
"She told me to ‘stop looking at her like that and finally ask her out for a drink.’"
The younger woman made a sound of absolute delight.
Garcia slowly set down the pen.
"I’m beginning to understand where all these rumors come from."
Santos smiled innocently.
"I have no idea what you're talking about."
The older woman leaned toward Santos and whispered conspiratorially:
"Is she really like this all the time?"
Santos looked at Garcia.
Garcia gave her a warning look.
Santos pretended to think deeply.
"The devil’s not as scary as people say."
The younger woman covered her mouth, trying to suppress laughter.
Garcia looked one second away from committing homicide.
"I swear to God, Santos..."
"Okay, fine, she’s all soft and cuddly at home."
The older woman shook her head, amused.
"You two are impossible."
Garcia let out a deep sigh and returned to the form.
"Employee signature number one..."
She signed with a quick, elegant motion and handed the document to Trinity.
"Sign."
Santos looked at the paper like it was a death sentence.
"I still think this is absurd."
"It’s policy."
"The hospital should be more concerned that your new resident nearly cut through someone’s bile duct."
"I reported that too."
"Of course you did."
She signed.
The older woman took the form and reviewed it calmly.
"You know..." she suddenly said while reading the document. "In hospital culture, paperwork like this is basically the equivalent of marriage."
Santos froze.
Slowly, she turned her head toward Garcia.
Garcia suddenly looked extremely interested in her phone.
"Excuse me??"
"Yes, from now on your vacation requests can be coordinated together, and if you ask for it, your schedules can overlap."
"Garcia... did you just..."
"It’s just a form."
"She said ‘hospital marriage.’"
"Trinity, don’t dramatize."
The older woman shrugged.
"I’ve seen plenty of these declarations. Most ended in marriage or a shared mortgage."
Santos was now staring exclusively at Garcia.
"Yolanda."
"We are not getting a mortgage together. My apartment has been paid off for years and I’m not looking for another one."
The younger woman burst out laughing.
"Oh my God, you actually did it!" Trinity said in disbelief.
"I did not."
"I literally just signed papers!"
"It’s an HR form!"
"You administratively married me!"
"Congratulations to the happy couple!" the redhead cheered.
"Don’t encourage her!" Trinity said without taking her eyes off the surgeon.
The older woman was openly laughing now.
Garcia looked mortally embarrassed, which in itself was a historic event.
A few minutes later they finally managed to leave the office.
Before the door had fully closed behind them, the women still heard the older employee’s voice from inside the office.
"Oh, they are so in love. Absolutely my favorite hospital couple."
Santos immediately turned toward Garcia.
"Yolanda Garcia, you are an evil woman!"
"Excuse me?"
"You just trapped me in a hospital marriage!"
Garcia started walking quickly down the hallway.
"It was a disclosure compliant with institutional policy."
"That is legal nonsense."
"I prefer handling things officially."
Santos caught up with her.
"Why did this matter so much to you?"
Garcia stopped only when they reached the elevators.
She looked at her calmly, softly.
"Because I want everyone to know you’re with me."
Santos fell silent instantly.
Garcia sighed lightly.
"This hospital gossips about everything. People talk. They stare. They judge. And I have no intention of pretending I don’t care. So we ended the rumors. Now they can find someone else to gossip about."
"Yolanda..."
"I also don’t want anyone thinking they can cross a line with you just because you’re early in your career, or that you’re getting procedures because we’re together."
Santos looked at her carefully.
And suddenly everything became very clear.
This wasn’t about regulations.
Or HR.
Or even gossip.
This was Garcia’s way of saying: you are mine and I intend to protect you.
Without dramatic declarations.
Without romantic speeches.
"You know that’s exactly what people think, right?" Santos asked more quietly.
"You perform those procedures because you’re the best ER resident this department has had in years, Trinity. So yes. I preferred handling this officially. Let every doctor in this hospital know who you belong to. And let them think twice before saying something inappropriate."
Santos felt warmth spread slowly through her chest.
Dangerous and oh...wonderful.
She smiled slowly.
"So do I get a ring now?"
Garcia rolled her eyes.
"Of course that’s what you’d say."
"You are officially my hospital wife now. And you know what that means?"
Trinity suddenly stepped closer.
Garcia immediately sensed danger.
"No."
"But I haven’t even done anything yet."
"I know that look."
Santos smiled slowly.
"It’s sad that you’re so distrustful of your own girlfriend."
"Trinity."
But it was already too late.
Santos grabbed the front of her scrubs and tried to kiss her.
Garcia immediately pulled her head back.
"What are you doing?!"
Santos looked genuinely confused.
"I’m trying to kiss you?"
"In the middle of the hallway?!"
"Yes?"
Garcia automatically glanced around.
Two nurses at the station were openly watching the situation. One had completely stopped typing into the computer.
"Santos. You know I don’t do this here."
Trinity looked at her very seriously.
" We just signed that damn paper. Besides every wedding ends with a kiss, right?"
Garcia froze.
For one second she just stared at her in complete silence.
Then she snorted with laughter and shook her head in disbelief.
"You are evil," Garcia admitted.
Then she leaned forward and pressed a brief kiss to Trinity’s lips.
Soft. Warm.
Long enough for the nurses behind them to let out muffled sounds of delighted excitement.
When Garcia pulled away, Santos looked like someone who had just won at life.
A triumphant grin spread across her face.