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Gai is still awake when it starts to rain. Thunder has been threatening on the horizon through-out the day, gathering intensity as he went about his exercises and chores with too much Determination and not nearly enough Focus; losing count, losing items, losing hold of something inside himself that had before been so fixed.
Now, laid out on the bed, he lets his mind swirl, angry as the wind outside.
Rain slides thickly down the window pane near his head, light splashes making their way in through the screen to wet the arm he’d flung out and simply left there. His lungs fill with ozone and petrichor, staring transfixed at the radiant flashes of light dancing in a bruise-purple sky.
His body is no longer wracking with sobs, but the tears won’t stop falling, splintering the light from the lamp outside into a kaleidoscope of colors, and he simply lets them be.
He makes vague attempts to push his mind into a calm void, but the constant aching thoughts keep crawling back in to twist and rot. Would they survive the Third War? Could Konoha ever seem bright and alive even to Maito Gai, after so much devastation?
Would the gaping hole of losing his father ever heal, or would the thought of Maito Dai burning away to ash in self-sacrifice forever haunt him?
He’s proud -bursting to the seams proud- that his father, the perpetual-genin, achieved such mighty status in the eyes of his peers. But it isn’t enough. Gai would a thousand times have rather lived with the low-level shame of watching his father beg for D-rank missions than go the rest of his life without him by his side; encouraging him, teaching him, and giving off endless Youth and Energy.
The sobs are back and Gai lets them ride his body. Here, in the dark, he can give in to the fear and loneliness churning his gut. In the light he would continue to make speeches about Victory and Believing in the Future, give his teammates everything that made Maito so Mighty. But in this dark, with the rain so deep, he can let the poison break to the surface and be washed away.
He doesn’t know what makes him glance away from the foreboding sky to the foot of his bed; not yet recognizing it as an instinctual sense that would be one of many reasons he’d eventually achieve jounin status. The fog of tears and scant amount of light don’t misshapen the silhouette of a figure standing against the wall and Gai’s body tightens, hand reaching for a weapon in his headboard…
“Gai.”
All his instincts are telling him that voice isn’t a threat, but confusion makes his hand clutch the kunai tightly at the sight of the ANBU mask. The person is wearing full armor, not in an attack stance, but leaning gently against the wall, arms casually at his sides.
The afterimage of lightning flickers through the room, lighting the mask enough to give shape to its relief and Gai feels recognition finally hit his brain.
“Kakashi?” He gently lays the kunai on the window sill, not wanting to make sudden movements if Kakashi is just coming back from a mission, having seen his rival almost literally have to claw his way out of this dangerous caricature of himself.
Gai scrubs a hand across his eyes, hot flushes of embarrassment tightening his skin. He hates that Kakashi found him in such a deplorable state of grief. “What are you doing here? Am I needed?” Battle adrenaline immediately saturates his system and he fully sits up, grabbing at the sheets to throw them off.
“No, nothing like that.” Gai relaxes, leaning slightly forward to better survey Kakashi’s body in the darkness. There’s no blood or other obvious signs of a skirmish, but there’s something tense in his friend’s posture, as cool as he’s trying to act. “I heard about Dai-san.”
Roiling pain explodes hot in Gai’s belly, his jaw clenching against the tears that have been riding on the crest of his despair all day. He tries to breathe, tries to calm the maelstrom of emotions that he never seems to fully be the master of.
Unlike Kakashi.
He feels weak and pathetic and suddenly wishing his friend was anywhere but here, something he’s never experienced in the many years of chasing after the other boy. He lays back down and turns onto his side, staring out of the window once more, hoping that his lack of answer will be enough of a clue for the other to leave.
“We’re both alone now.” Gai’s eyes widen, sympathy cooling the burning pain and he glances down at his friend still shrouded in the dark. They are both orphans now. “But that doesn’t mean we have to be alone.” Gai’s eyebrows knit together in confusion; Kakashi’s enigmatic statements often take him a while to parse through and reach a conclusion, if he ever comes to an understanding at all.
Before Gai can do more than shift up onto his elbows, intending to stand and give his friend some kind of physical assurance, Kakashi has removed his porcelain mask, dropping it carelessly to the floor, his hitai-ate taken with it and the red of the sharingan shows faintly through the flickering dark.
Gai pauses completely- the scant few times he’s seen that glow have been in battle. Seeing it here, like this, is slightly terrifying.
In his hesitation, the buckles of Kakashi’s armor are undone, sliding off his body, along with his long gloves, but it isn’t until Kakashi starts taking his shirt off that Gai begins to panic, not understanding what’s happening.
“Kakashi, what are you doing?” He thinks his friend might have grinned, but his mask is still in place. The faint light isn’t enough to see clear expressions through the cloth.
“I’m seducing you.” It’s said so plainly, so baldly, that Gai can barely register the implications.
In his few moments of bewilderment Kakashi unclasps his pants and lets them fall to the floor as well. Gai’s heart speeds up so quickly he feels lightheaded with the rushing blood; Kakashi isn’t wearing underwear. His friend’s entire body is on display, only the mask leaving a blush of modesty between them.
Kakashi moves slowly towards the bed and Gai’s body trembles, too out of control with wonder to move. His breath heaves through his lungs, blood pumping down to engorge him, the curved outline obvious beneath the thin sheet.
“Why?” He tries desperately, voice thin and wondering. He watches Kakashi crawl onto the bed, on hands and knees like a stalking predator; which is appropriate given how trapped and pinned down with rushing want Gai feels.
“Because I don’t want us to be alone.” Kakashi breathes as he crawls closer, legs encasing Gai’s hips. “I want to be with you.” He finally states boldly, face coming to hover over Gai’s, so close he can finally see his friend’s other eye.
Gai jumps a little when one of Kakashi’s hands brushes his own, pulling it forward so he has to shift his weight to one shaking arm, pushing him closer to Kakashi. Their clasped hands lift to his naked friend’s face, his fingers inserted around the edge of the mask. Gai’s chest clenches at the implication as Kakashi’s hand falls away, bracing against his shoulder; the contact there sends shivers of taut electricity through his body.
Gai engages his stomach muscles in a half crunch in order to not move too quickly into Kakashi’s space and still reach the fingers of his other hand out to skim across the skin of a soft knee and up to an even softer thigh. He thrills at the shiver that moves the lithe muscles hovering above him, dazed as he sees the hardening of his dearest friend’s most intimate of parts. His courage builds exponentially, knowing that they’re both deeply effected by this. Gai finally tugs the mask down to pool along Kakashi’s delicate collar bones.
He stares, feeling faint with his friend’s unexpected beauty, with all of the implications piling up and reaching incredible conclusions.
His curiosity and adoration of Kakashi has set fire to his actions for years, but he had long come to the acceptance that he would never be given this. Kakashi has had so many layers wrapped tight around him for so long Gai wonders if he’s ever been this bare before, physically and emotionally.
The idea throbs through Gai’s system and he sits up fully, sliding a broad hand up Kakashi’s smooth, pale thigh to grip at his hip, shifting his lovely rival forward against him and they both groan, Gai more heartily, but Kakashi in a tone so honest that Gai can sense how much he truly wants this.
His fingers curl back around Kakashi’s neck to deftly untie the knot there, tugging away the last of Kakashi’s layers and with his enigmatic, secretive bastard of a friend so trusting and open in his arms he feels invincible and so humbled he starts to cry again.
Kakashi’s long fingers cup at his jaw, drawing him forward into a deep kiss and Gai’s ardor flames, sucking breath in through his nose and suddenly they’re clutching desperately at one another, shifting fully together till Kakashi’s stiff cock is half pressed to his stomach, half into the sheets pooled around Gai’s hips.
He wonders if they should be taking this slower, but they’re both young and in the throws of war. Have spent too many years dancing around the idea that perhaps their friendship is just a little deeper, a little more meaningful than any other.
Gai isn’t a virgin, and Kakashi’s adept hands running the length of his back tell him his friend likely isn’t either. But there’s something here that makes Gai feel as if this is the first body he’s ever held, the first mouth he’s ever tasted. Kakashi blindly tugs at the sheets caught between them while Gai pulls him further up the bed, rolling them until Kakashi is on his back and their legs tangle amidst the cloth.
Kakashi parts his legs, their thighs whispering together as Gai settles into the cradle of that inviting embrace.
In the years to come Gai will learn that Kakashi craves being marked: bruises upon old scars, scratches running the length of his arms, his back and his legs. That while he’s out on missions, he’ll dig his fingers into them and remember Gai’s desperation and love; feel less haunted, less hunted.
In turn Kakashi will discover Gai’s adoration of his voice, that he’ll listen rapturously to Kakashi’s pleas and his joy moaned into Gai’s ears, be brought to the brink of sanity if Kakashi decides to murmur fantasies and lustful promises over a period of days.
These are things they’ve yet to discover about each other and themselves; in this moment they’re quiet and desperate and gentle. Gai’s clothes are twisted from his body, opening to the sensation of Kakashi’s skin and boney frame pressing all long his. There’s lubricant from somewhere and Gai’s fingers are being covered, urged down to stroke himself, groaning heartily at the relief. His other hand has found its way to grip the blistering heat of Kakashi’s cock, the feeling lighting him up all along his hand, up his arm, settling deeply in his chest as Kakashi pushes his hips towards the grip.
If asked, Gai would admit to having wondered (many times) what it would be like to work his way into Kakashi’s body. It’s almost without thought that his hand slides from Kakashi’s cock and around thighs, fingers sliding further back and into the hot place between his cheeks. He’s confused to find the area so slick, and Kakashi sighs gently, wiggling his hips into those fingers.
“You can go ahead, I already prepped.” It’s such an arousing thought Gai can’t breathe for a moment.
“That- would have been something I’d liked to have seen.” Kakashi, the man who stripped unashamedly for him, blatantly seduced him- blushes at the idea of Gai watching him finger himself open.
“Maybe next time.” Gai wants to cry with the joy of there possibly being a next time, but uses the time instead to push Kakashi’s legs back and line himself up. He doesn’t make them wait any longer, they’ve waited so long already.
The slide into his dearest friend is the sweetest Gai has ever experienced. He wants to make proclamations, shout his love from the rain-slicked roofs, but can’t seem to get his ragged breath under control. All his passion pours down his face instead, mouthed away by Kakashi till both their faces are wet.
“Kashi!” He gasps, ozone-rich oxygen finally expanding his lungs; his hips instinctually pull him out and plunge back in one smooth motion and Gai is allowed the absolute joy of seeing Kakashi awash with pleasure, feel the groan reverberate in their chests.
Gai doesn’t stop, uses his hardened well-trained muscles to work his cock slowly, deeply into the beautiful man beneath him. Kakashi’s shaking arms wind around his shoulders, long legs locking tightly behind his back, as if he’s trying to pull Gai completely into his body; trying to become one entity so they’re never truly alone again. Gai aches with the same want.
Close shots of thunder shake the walls around them, static-electricity tingling their skin as they rock together, straining and struggling their slick bodies. Gai wants desperately for it to last, wants to live in this love, but can feel his cock yearning to spill his seed, marking Kakashi as his forever, his Man of Destiny.
He kisses Kakashi’s noisy mouth, swallowing up moans and incoherent words; when he pulls away there’s moisture left on his cheeks, tears pooled in Kakashi’s eyes. Gai’s eyes open wide, his hips tripping into a higher gear.
Kakashi smiles, gasps, “You’re my Man of Destiny too.” I love you.
Gai’s groin clenches deliciously tight, snapping his hips to Kakashi’s again and again. He cries out in a high desperate way he can’t control as his orgasm crests along with thick crashes of lighting, barely feels the warm splash shooting all over their bellies. The internal throbbing holds him tight and close as he rides through the powerful culmination of their love.
Hands slide to his neck, to his face and he’s pulled down to Kakashi’s mouth, only then realizing they’re both shaking, Kakashi trembling tightly beneath his body. Gai boxes his friend in with his thick arms, nuzzles against his cheek as they both wind down.
A cloth is pressed into his hand and he pulls back, quickly pushing it between Kakashi’s cheeks after he pulls out. He thinks maybe they should have used a condom, but is honest enough with himself that he doesn’t care. He gently lays himself next to Kakashi, gathering his lithe frame up into his arms. Gai’s back is to the window, and though he can still feel the storm, the rain cooling moisture onto his back, he doesn’t feel the endless misery any longer.
“Gai, promise me something.”
“Anything my love.” Kakashi sighs.
“I know you. You’re going to learn that technique.” The Gates. His father’s secret training. He hadn’t really thought about it, but realizes it is because he has already Decided.
“Yes. Do not ask me not to Kashi.” Gray hair rubs against his chin as Kakashi shakes his head.
“You should honor your father. Just promise me- the Gates are dangerous Gai, all of them. But the Eighth Gate…energy only goes one way through that Gate, there’s no coming back. Promise me you’ll only use it at the end. When the whole world is going to fall.”
Gai thinks of his father, alight in chakra and glorious to behold.
He thinks of Kakashi, eyes dripping tears like the rain outside.
“I promise.”