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Foolish could always spot Juan from a mile away, usually accompanied by a stack of paperwork. If you’re trying to join the North, you meet with Juan, not Vegetta. The man handles more North business than the king himself, surprisingly. Juan yelled often. Sometimes at others during his “business/north meetings”, but mostly at Foolish for stupid stuff.
Like that one time, when Foolish had offered to be Tubbo’s lawyer.
A couple of the North members were hanging out in the general meeting room, discussing the upcoming court case, Alondrissa v. Tubbo. Foolish was discussing his plans for the trial with Tina, as they had both witnessed the chaos of the last case—albeit a custody case—which had a similar English/Spanish barrier. He was discussing the case when Juan came in, threw his papers onto a side table, and sat down in one of the office chairs across from Foolish.
Foolish’s heart had skipped a beat.
For the split second the shark totem and brunette made eye contact, it felt like it was just the two of them there, together.
Juan snapped out of it first, slightly flustered but composed.
What are you guys talking about? ¿Qué pasando?”
Foolish beamed, “I’m just talking with Tina about all of the strategies Jaiden used for a past court case, especially with the English-Spanish difficulties.”
“For the train problem?”
“Yeah—like Alondrissa versus Tubbo,”
“Oh, I’m gonna be in that.” Juan announced.
“Wait-you’re gonna WHAT?”
“Huh?” Tina was clearly confused as well.
“I’m gonna be Alondrissa's lawyer,” Juan announces.
“Wait! What do you mean you’re gonna be a lawyer?!” Foolish responded. The shark totem looked especially nervous.
“Yeah,” Juan said smugly. “I’m gonna be a lawyer.”
“Um. Juan…”
Juan continued, “That’s right I’m gonna be a lawyer,” before seeing the nervous look on Foolish’s face and Tina’s smirk. Juan’s face shifted from proud to annoyed, looking straight at Foolish.
“WHAT.” he spat.
“You're the lawyer?” Tina said, snickering. She looked at Juan as if she didn’t believe him, or was it something else? He couldn’t tell.
Foolish ruffled his hair nervously. “You’re, um, you’re looking at Tubbo’s lawyer right now,”
Tina was clearly eating this up, holding back laughter as she looked between the two.
“Oh FUCK.” Juan looked pissed.
“¡ESTÚPIDO!” Juan yelled.
“WHY DO YOU HAVE TO FUCK MY LIFE”
“I AM NOT FUCKING YOUR LIFE” Foolish yelled back.
“YES YOU ARE! CHINGADE-“
Tina slams her hands on the table. “YOU TWO ALWAYS ARGUE LIKE A MARRIED COUPLE AND I’M SICK OF IT! SHUT UP!” Tina interjects.
Both men turn to look at her, surprised.
Tina then turns on therapist mode.
Channelling her inner KatieB, she looks towards both of them, “Juan, what did Foolish do?”
“HE-HE RUINED EVERYTHING. Dáme un momento,” Juan paused to take a breath. “I was SUPPOSED to be Alondrissa’s lawyer.”
“Ohh shit,” Foolish and Tina say simultaneously.
Both of them look at each other, basically telepathically communicating.
“I’m sure it’ll be fine. I mean, we’re… friends outside of it. It’s basically just like work.”
Foolish wished he hadn’t paused before saying friends, but the blush on his face gives a clear explanation.
“Yeah, we’re friends, and yet we argue all the time here. Why not argue with a purpose this time in the court?”
Tina looks at Foolish, taking in his expression, before turning to look at Juan.
The gears in her brain turned as she returned to her favela roots. Before her sat a flustered shark totem on one end, avoiding eye contact with the brunette on the other end, who was equally as flushed. They both were trying hard to make it look like they were deep in thought, pondering the best possible solution. She knew, though, that Foolish was freaking out about the “friends” thing, probably recalling his memories with Juan and overanalyzing every interaction, for the hope that they were more than “friends”.
Now, Tina couldn’t say the same for Juan, as they weren’t that close. Juan was more like a coworker; she knew the inner workings of his mind less than she knew Foolish’s. Foolish and Tina were basically an unstoppable duo, and Foolish would tell her everything. The two would hang out in Tina’s room and just yap about anything and everything.
From what Foolish would tell her, and how Juan was looking right now, and from how she had seen the two interact, Tina could put together a rough idea. Juan was probably doing something similar, probably kicking himself or overthinking his choice to reaffirm the “friends label”.
Tina had SO. MUCH. to tell Alondrissa.
Now, if Tina were more like Katie, she might’ve told them to just kiss each other, but those two idiots had to get their heads out of the ground and confront their feelings.
“Well that’s settled! Bye guys have fun!!” She dashed out, leaving the two alone.
Foolish attempted to call out for her to wait, but he was so caught off guard that he just squeaked.
Juan laughed. “I’m surprised such a big scary guy like you can sound just like a little mouse,”
Foolish whips his head around to Juan, looking at him with an expression of mock offense. “Me, scary?! I’m just a little guy!”
Juan scoffs, “You’re nine feet tall, eso imposible—”
“Hey! It’s entirely possible. I’m immortal!” Foolish argues.
“Yeah yeah whatever, anyways,” Juan pauses. “you’re big and scary, I mean not to me but-“
“You just said I was impossibly ta-“
“NO ME INTERRUMPAS. ESPERA.”
“You’re scary to any newcomers, you’re like, like, this big shark-totem, but then really you’re just like a strawberry cake, like Vegetta said,” Juan said, teasingly. “How am I supposed to argue against you if all I see standing across from me in court is a strawberry cake?”
The ragebait didn’t work, and Foolish flushed red.
Foolish willed himself back and attempted a witty response. “If I lose in court, I’m suing you. who’s el estúpido NOW!”
Juan couldn’t stop himself from giggling at Foolish’s spanglish.
“Tu español es pésimo, pero de una forma adorable.” Juan mumbled.
“What did you say?” Foolish looked at him, quizzically, but Juan swore he saw a hint of knowingness in his eyes.
“Nothing important.”