Chapter Text
It has been two years since the first season of the Ridonculous Race ended, two years since officers MacArthur and Sanders took the million dollar prize. Two years since it seemed like the Total Drama franchise came to an end.
That is, until the cameras started rolling on a busy subway station. Hordes of people walk across a ridged floor as their chatter gets louder and louder. The crowd lessens as the silhouette of a familiar host, Don appears with a smile on his face.
“Welcome to New York City, home of iconic landmarks like the Statue of Liberty, The Empire State Building, and The Brooklyn Bridge. It’s also home to where the pigeon roams freely.”
A pigeon lands on Don’s head, it coos comfortably as she prepares to make his hair into a nest before Don quickly shoos her away. A ring shines on his finger.
“I’m standing at Grand Central Station, where 18 teams, some old and some new, are ready to embark on yet another race around the world. I’m your host, Don. And we’re back with…The Ridonculous Race!”
Babababababa Ridonculous Race intro….oooooooo teams running….ooooooooo new locations….oooooooo team cards at the end….RIDONCULOUS RACE
“That’s right, 9 of your favorite teams are coming back as well as 9 newbies who willingly decided to join, too! And as much as I’d like to believe it’s because of how much fun they’ll have, it may have more to do with the fact that this season's prize is not one, but two million dollars!”
Don walks across the station, where a small table with a cloth on it stands. He looks at it with a smile before uncovering the fabric to reveal a briefcase full of money. It seems to shimmer as the cameras zoom in closer. Don covers the table back up, dusting his hands as he looks to the viewers once again.
“I know, ain’t she a beauty? And it may go home to one of our lucky teams competing here today.”
A ding comes from the Grand Central Station intercom as a train makes a hasty stop. People seem to flood the area once more as a duo emerges from the subway bobbing their heads to an imaginary guitar solo.
”And here comes our first returnee team now, ready to jam on once again and get out of their parents’ basement, it’s the Rockers!”
——————————————————————————————————————
Interview: The Rockers
Rock sits to the right of Spud once more, the backdrop behind them being the same continental map as the previous season. Their outfits are the same as before as well.
The blonde guitarist smiles at the camera, “It’s like, totally awesome to be back on the race! This time, I actually know that our chances towards making it to the finale are way higher. Just ask Spud!”
Spud, who seemed to be in his own world entirely, pauses for a moment before reacting to what his friend said, “We’re in the finale dude? Awesome!”
Rock looks at Spud, slightly concerned but then just shrugs and smiles, just happy to be back in the competition with his best friend.
——————————————————————————————————————
The humble host greets the first returning team with a kind wave, “Nice to have you back, Rockers! Please feel free to wait at the Ridonculous-Race patented pedestrian platform.” Don gestures to the lovely carpeted area.
“Sweet!” ♫ Rock sings, pleasantly surprised. Both rockers continue to bob their heads to invisible music as they follow the host’s directions and walk off-screen. Soon after, another team from the same train hops off. Lighting flashes behind them, mystical music playing from out of nowhere, scaring Don a little. Turns out some performer on the side decided to give the team a magical entrance. They seem pleased.
“Our second team here today because every other team we tried to ask left me a voicemail… The Larpers!” Don announces, not before one of the returnees extends a hand kindly.
“I’d never leave a call unanswered! What kind of wizard would I be if I did so?” Leonard confidently spoke, as Tammy nodded along. “Unprofessional!”
——————————————————————————————————————
Interview: The Larpers
Leonard’s robe is now a teal-green tint as opposed to a pure leaf-green one. Tammy sports her similar get-up as before as well, only this time her smile expresses much more excitement.
“Tammy and I are so happy to be invited back to the race!” Leonard proclaimed, clapping his hands together as he looked to his best companion.
Tammy, still smiling, “I honestly couldn't believe it at first. But after winning our fourth campaign in a row, it seems like things are finally starting to go our way.”
Leonard nods, “Agreed! So long as it’s not a desert that crosses our path..” The two seem to look awkwardly to their sides, cringing at the memory.
——————————————————————————————————————
As soon as The Larpers exit, sudden triumphant music plays from within the train scaring Don straight to the bone. Two dazzlingly dressed adults jump across a crowd of people. They seem to have permanent smiles stuck to their faces as they wave to nobody. The corner performer looks to his side with fear.
Don, much calmer now, “And coming in third, like always, it’s the Ice Dancers!”
For a moment, it looks like they’re going to react and scream at him, however all that comes from them is a little eye twitch from Josee and two very bright, perfected smiles.
——————————————————————————————————————
Interview: The Ice Dancers
Jacques and Josee have added glitter to their faces as well as previously-worn outfits. They practically shimmer on camera, even when Josee is trying to keep it together.
“Last season, we got snubbed at the last second to miss out on the gold.”
Jacques, shuddering, “And even the silver…”
At such a mention, Josee tries desperately not to grit her teeth, “It was all those Cadets’ faults! So now we’re vowing to take them out of the game early and prove ourselves to the world and our adoring fans!” She extends her arms, almost glittering.
Jacques does the same soon after, “Don’s silly little remarks will not get to us and neither will our competitors!”
The two smirk confidently at the camera, clearly nothing’s changed since last season.
——————————————————————————————————————
After the Ice Dancers hog up their screen time by waving to the cameras, Don (not so kindly) motions for them to step aside. A few loud cheers can be heard as the Surfers jump out the train next, handing out a respective fist bump to Don, high fives to the other teams and even some random passersby, the Ice Dancers blank them when they approach. Don gives a big smile to the camera, “Last season’s runners up and voted the fan favorites, the Surf-”
“Dude!! Wait for real?! People voted for us?!” Geoff interrupts, putting both his hands to his head in such a shock.
Brody does not seem as pleased, he slumps over slightly, “Aw man, I’m so not ready to be the president..”
The blonde surfer pats his bro’s shoulder reassuringly, shaking his head, “No bro, people voted for us to be the fan-favorites!! Basically the most popular people here.”
Brody’s eyes slowly start to enlarge as the information becomes clear, “Ooooh!! Phew!!”
——————————————————————————————————————
Interview: The Surfers
The ever so famous Geoff, accompanied by his swamp green sombrero, has now grown his blonde hair to the tip of his back. He wears a similar tropical pink shirt, only this time, there are some light pink and blue flowers on them. Brody looks mostly the same as well, only having Geoff’s previously adorned gold-necklace on his own neck now.
Geoff smiles brightly, “Me and Brodes are like, super stoked to be back for another season!”
Brody nods, “Yeah man! It was kinda a bummer we couldn’t win the mil but we had such an awesome time that we had to come back!” He anticipates in his seat, staring at his chill companion.
“Totally dude! Can’t wait to travel around the world again with my best bro!” Geoff points at Brody, causing his eyes to twinkle.
“I was literally just about to say that dude!”
“Dude… We’re so awesome.”
Geoff and Brody fist bump, saying ‘Boom!’ simultaneously.
——————————————————————————————————————
Don clears his throat, furrowing his eyebrows at the surfers, “Yes, yes. Exciting stuff. Don’t interrupt me next time, please.”
“You got it dude, my bad.” Geoff responds as he and Brody join the other teams.
No one appears to be coming out of the train, it’s eerily silent. That is until a loud CRASH can be heard off camera as everyone panics. Police sirens accompany the commotion as one cadet emerges from a broken window and another walks in cautiously.
“MacArther!!” The cautious, yet authoritative voice of Officer Sanders appears into frame. She’s utterly in disbelief of the mess while MacArther thinks nothing of it, shrugging, “What? That window was violating multiple health codes.”
Don, unfazed at yet another mishap, “Last season's winners… Here come the Cadets!” A notification comes from the mini microphone in his ear. “Hey… Am I going to have to pay for that? Really?”
——————————————————————————————————————
Interview: The Cadets
The Cadets seem to look and behave much more freely than the time they were originally competing. Their uniforms look spiffier, and Sander’s arm has completely healed. And of course, MacArthur wears an eye-blindingly shiny badge.
She leans back on the interview wall, “Yeeup. Winning the million last season was pretty darn good.”
Sanders rolls her eyes, but overall smiles at her partner, “Plus getting to rub our prize money in the Ice Dancers’ faces was a nice added bonus.”
MacArthur cackles, “HA! You got that right, can’t wait to rub it in their faces again! They’ll blow a gasket if they see us win more millions back to back. That’s why we’re back again!”
Sanders frowns. “We were also really bored, turns out putting parking tickets on cars really isn’t that fun.”
——————————————————————————————————————
“Nice seeing you again, Cadets! How’s the arm treating you, Sanders?” Don asks the cadet.
Sanders smiles happily and flexes her muscles. “Much better than it was 2 years ago, thanks! Hopefully it can stay that way.” Sanders squints her eyes at MacArthur.
“Hey, I promise to be on my best behavior this season!” MacArther puts one of her hands to her chest, as if to take an oath. People off-screen are complaining about the broken glass-window within Grand Central Station. Sanders continues to glare. “Starting, now.”
Don, quickly trying to move on, “Well, that’s great to hear! Why don’t you two join the other teams before the next train arrives?”
The Cadets awkwardly shuffle off-screen. They make eye contact with the Ice Dancers, which soon turns into a glare battle filled with threatening (and not so network friendly) hand motions. The next train conveniently makes another stop. A small portion of people step off the train, with one of them being Junior, a now 15-year old teen listening to music on his headphones. He looks around the area for someone before taking them off.
“Uh…Mom?”
“Here! I’m here!”
A woman quickly steps into the frame, with short blonde hair and kind eyes, it’s evident that even without Junior calling for her, many could determine that she was 100% his mom. She’s on the chubby side, and a floral tattoo can be spotted just barely visible beneath the puffy sleeves of her mesh shirt. Her jeans are adorned with patches and hand-sewn designs. Overall she looks a complete contrast to Dwayne Sr.
“Sorry, got caught up in the rush to get off!”
Don extends a hand towards the duo, “Introducing Mom and Son! With Phoebe now taking over the role of Ridonculous parent this time.”
——————————————————————————————————————
Interview: Mom and Son
Contrary to Dwayne Sr, the mother, Phoebe, sits to the left of Junior. Allowing for her son to have some personal space.
Phoebe, chuckling, “Hi everyone! I’m Phoebe, I’m 39. Uhhh- I’m a graphic designer and-“
“Mom, you don’t need to introduce yourself like that.” Junior cuts in.
Jumping at the sudden interruption, “Oh! Right! Well, it’s just everyone already knows you and I thought introducing yourself is what you did on these kinds of shows!”
Phoebe’s fingers fiddle with her necklace, feeling slightly cautious. Junior notices.
“I’m sure people will be excited to get to know you.” He softens his tone.
A smile crosses Phoebe’s face. “You really think so?”
“Yeah, you’re cool. At least, I think you’re cool.” Immediately as Junior said those words, Phoebe leaned over and hugged Junior tight, “Aw sweetie!”
She gives Junior a kiss on the forehead, he squirms but doesn’t pull away, an embarrassed blush on his cheeks.
“Mom!”
——————————————————————————————————————
Phoebe, glancing over at the competition, “Why don’t you go say hi to your friends, I need to pop to the ladies room real quick…that was a long train journey.” Before Junior can answer, Phoebe zips off, he shrugs and walks over to join the other teams.
Geoff walks over to the familiar teen, offering a fist bump, “Yo yo Junior, how you been my guy?”
Junior smiles, taking the offer, “Going alright, feels pretty strange to be back here though..”
Soon enough, Brody joins in too, giving him a low five, “Feel you there, and speaking of being back, what’s up with the Dwayneman? How come he couldn’t make it along?”
Junior looks awkward for a moment, fidgeting with his ear piercing, he then brightens up like he had a light-bulb moment. “He, uh, got a promotion at his job! So he’s super busy now with work, but I’m glad my mom could come along this time!”
Geoff, nodding understandably, “Having a job is hard work, Bridge is running a surf school over in Australia and she says it’s tough, but she’s happy to teach the little and big dudes how to ride the waves!”
“Woah really? That sounds awe-“ Suddenly, Junior feels someone cruelly bump his shoulder. He turns his head to attempt to look daggers at the perpetrator. Instead, he rolls his eyes at the familiar brunette and blonde duo.
“Move it or lose it, dork.” Taylor scoffed, the sound of her heels in a desperate hurry to leave. Meanwhile, Kelly rushed afterward, eyeing the small teen. “So sorry Junior!”
As Phoebe returns to join Junior, she notices Kelly and seems to brighten up at the fact there’s another parent here.
Don slips back into the frame. “No parental switch up this time, it’s Mother and Daughter!”
—————————————————————————————————————
Interview: Mother and Daughter
The high-class family has lost little to no money since their early elimination. Taylor now wears fancy, yet more expendable boots in case she’d wear them out too quickly. Kelly now has some sunglasses tucked neatly atop her hair.
Taylor starts, filing her nails, “Yeah so like, after being told I actually wasn’t good at anything I did, I tried going back to school to try and like, actually learn things. Buut, all I did was win some dumb student of the month award instead of winning prom queen! Sooo yeah, now I’m basically stuck here with my mom again or whatever.”
Kelly giggles, “Taylor sure has grown to be a smart cookie! I wanted her to compete with her dad this year but you know him. Always busy, busy, busy! Haha.” Her eye twitches.
“Really? Because I thought Dad said-“
“Hey Taylor, why don’t we go shopping?” Kelly asks with gritted teeth.
“I thought you said that was a bad habit we needed to break but hey, I’m not complaining.” Taylor shrugs, a smug smile appearing.
—————————————————————————————————————-
Phoebe practically shakes Junior with excitement. “Oh, Junior! Is this one of the friends that you made last season?”
Junior glares at Taylor, “More like an enemy…”
“Sorry?” Before Phoebe could question why, Don moves right along.
“And looks like more enemies are on their way now!”
People stand in awe, their eyes glimmering when two loves wearing sporty attire step out of the train. They look at the camera and smile, waving at it to reveal the shiny new rings on their fingers.
“Lovers turned enemies back to lovers, here come the Daters/Haters/Fiancer’s! Man, that is a long title.” The host scratches the back of his neck.
—————————————————————————————————————-
Interview: The Daters/Haters/Fiancer’s
The college-sweethearts have not changed much during their previous ventures, both physically and mentally. Though, the two now sport a shiny new golden ring on their fingers. It shines within the camera’s lens.
Stephanie smirks at her fiance. “What? Had to stick to what we’re known for!”
Ryan rolls his eyes before composing himself. “After Stephanie and I got back together during the first season, we got engaged and went on a ton more romantic reality TV-shows!”
“And while we haven’t managed to win any of them, they were all just practice for the race, we’re back, even more in love than ever and we will win this time!” Stephanie places a fist on her palm.
Ryan smiles wide. “I love when you get all competitive!”
Stephanie, gasping, “And I love that you love that!”
Romantic music plays in the background, the two kiss passionately.
—————————————————————————————————————-
Don begins to count all the teams that have arrived, he scratches his head, slightly confused.
“That’s odd, I swore we had 9 returning- GAH!”
He whips his head around and stares at the final team, the ever silent and terrifying Goths. They blink slowly, as if they hadn’t been standing behind Don until he noticed them.
Don clutches his chest slightly, “And…our final returning team. The Goths! Please stop doing that.”
—————————————————————————————————————-
Interview: The Goths
Neither the same gothically dressed Crimson or Ennui say anything, both are just staring at the camera and slow blinking.
—————————————————————————————————————-
Don, fixing his hair, “Yes, don’t say a word and move right along to join the others!”
The Goths unhurriedly walk towards the waiting area, standing motionless. They sigh and stare at nothing. Everyone else shudders, while MacArthur raises an eyebrow.
“Wait, are these all the teams competing this year? Haha! This’ll be a piece of cake!”
Josee cuts in with a louder voice, “HA! A piece of gold cake for US, maybe!”
The two former finalists exchange a tense look.
“Easy you two, these are only half of the teams.” Don settles the two enemies.
Josee and MacArthur both dart their heads away from each other, “WHAT?!”
Another train pulls up to the station, Don smiles, the other teams look with intrigue and confusion.
“Now we couldn’t make this race that easy, that would be dumb and bad for ratings! Which is why I’m happy to be able to introduce NINE brand new teams that will be joining us this season! Starting with…”
A team steps out of the train, the subway suddenly feels much more earth-like than before. Everybody turns to stare blankly except Junior and Leonard, recognizing the pair easily.
“Look at these losers Roddy, we’ve got this in the bag!” A ginger man with a slimy voice crawls out of the vehicle, rubbing his hands together.
‘Roddy’, nervously laughs beside him, “Ha…do we wanna be talking bad while right in front of them, Scott?”
Don happily welcomes them, “Scott and Rodney, the Country Boys!”
—————————————————————————————————————-
Interview: The Country Boys
Despite looking like cousins, their personal attire could not have been more different. All Scott could care to wear is a tank-top and ripped jeans, with minor injuries all over his body being visible. Rodney looked much more dapper with his new brown overalls and jeans, complementing his new vanilla shirt.
Scott crosses his arms, “Rodney and I are cousins, we tried out for our own seasons on another reality show, Total Drama. But that skeezeball host Chris just made our lives miserable.” He points off-camera, as if Chris was there himself.
Rodney claps his hands together, “So me and Scotty decided we should team up instead! It’ll be fun to hang out and get to travel the world!”
Snickering, Scott rubs his hands together. “And get to sabotage other teams.”
Rodney laughs. “Haha, yeah! Wait what?”
—————————————————————————————————————-
Phoebe looks at Rodney, squinting her eyes a little before she turns to look at Leonard playing a game with Tammy. She looks back and forth at the two before gasping quietly and shaking her son with quiet enthusiasm again.
“Junior!! Aren’t those the contestants from Pahkitew Island?”
Junior, nonchalantly, “Oh. Yeah I guess they are. Didn’t think they’d be here.”
Not the reaction Phoebe was expecting, she lets go of her son and just smiles at the new team. Internally, Junior blankly watches Rodney, his thoughts telling him to “stay cool.” Rodney walks past him, with Leonard recognizing the country boy and happily waving at him.
As Don goes to announce the next team, two loud squeals can be heard, the pitch so high that it temporarily mucks with his in-ear microphone. As everyone looks to see who broke the sound barrier, two fashionable girls step out of the train, their outfits looking nearly identical to one another. They’re carrying bags of what looks to be finely made clothing.
“Hey, hey, hey!! Guess who’s heeerreee!!” Sadie sings, waving the bags in the air as she poses.
Katie mimics her with a blinding smile, “Hi everyone! I’m Katie!!”
“And I’m Sadie!! You may know us from our recently-opened fashion store caalled…” Sadie pauses, her mouth quivering before both BFFFLS sing…
“Kadie Clothing!!”
Sadie squeals, “The name’s a work in progress. But anyways, we brought everyone some free samples from our clothing line!! Feel free to take as many as you want!!”
“Free clothes that actually don’t look ugh? I’m so in.” Taylor struts towards the fashionistas.
Don, rolling his eyes at the interruption, “Introducing the BFFFLs! Whatever that stands for!”
—————————————————————————————————————-
Interview: The BFFFLS
Katie and Sadie’s seats leave no room for any empty space between the two. Their hands interlock. Both have their iconic matching outfits, with some few adjustments as Katie has a mini purse and Sadie has a small pink backpack.
Katie begins the interview, “Sadie and I have been Best Female Friends for Life for like… over 15 years now!! Can you believe that?!”
Sadie nods with a smile, “Yeah, and aside from appearing in interviews, we’ve just graduated college and are starting our own fashion-line!! Katie spent all night sewing and making these outfits for today, you should have seen how tired she was. She managed to do it, though!! Isn’t that just so great?!”
Her best friend blushes, “Awwww Sadie!! Stoop… You’re so sweet!! Don’t discredit yourself though, you managed to ride the train without us getting lost, plus, you spoke in front of so many people just now. That takes so much confidence!”
Sadie holds her hands to her cheeks, “Awww!! Katie!!”
The two hug, squealing with happiness.
“I hope everyone likes our clothing!!” Katie smiles.
—————————————————————————————————————-
Most teams seem rather appreciative of the free clothing samples, the Ice Dancers however, pretend to be unimpressed by the supposed new fashionistas. Though, even they cannot deny that the quality of their fabric is pretty darn good.
Rock admires the clothing, “Woah!! This is like, killer quality man! Could I use this as a bandana?”
Katie’s eyes light up, “Oh my god yes! It would totally suit you. You’re already rocking that one on your head!”
Rock smiles brightly, before breaking out into air guitar. Katie and Sadie look at each other satisfyingly and dance to the nonexistent rhythm.
Geoff, previously spotting them from afar, now sprints over to them, “Katie! Sadie! Dudes it’s been forever!”
Katie and Sadie turn their heads, squeal and run over, hugging the surfer with bright smiles.
“Geoff! It’s soooo good seeing you again!” Sadie says.
“Yeah! This race just got like…even better!” Katie continues.
Eyeing the exchange, Scott nudges Rodney, “Heh, those two won’t last long. I can already tell.”
“Should we really be making assumptions about other teams we’re meeting for the first time?” Rodney caresses the area where Scott elbowed him.
Scott rolls his eyes, “What’s the harm? We’re just scoping out the competition, we wanna win after all! It’s not like some reality TV show veteran is gonna walk in and ruin the fun.”
Rodney doesn’t look convinced, but he trusts Scott so he’ll go along with it, for now.
Josee, mutters to Jacques, “If this is our competition, the gold may be far easier than we thought!”
The two begin to laugh evilly, much to the annoyance of anyone standing around them.
A commanding voice suddenly echos through the station, “God, this station is massive! How does anyone find their way around here without a map?”
A similar, yet more high-pitched voice follows soon after, “Good thing I found one online and printed it out in advance, it would be embarrassing to show up late.”
“No need to rub it in.” The first one groans.
Coming down the stairs, a map covers their faces. Their voices however, are recognizable to many.
Josee, gritting her teeth, “Is that Em-” Scott, eyes widening, “Is that Court-“
The map is put away, revealing two contestants that you would probably never want to team up together.
Don smirks, "Ready to bring some justice in this race... Here comes Courtney and Emma! The Lawyers!"
—————————————————————————————————————-
Interview: The Lawyers
The air is already so tense. The former veteran player sits with composure, while the other stares with authority. Courtney, still in her familiar outfit, has much more noticeable curly hair than previous seasons. Emma’s is much more straightened, with a cardigan that is being held together by one button.
Emma sharply speaks, “Courtney and I are rivals at our law school. We’re constantly competing to be better than the other.”
Courtney places a hand to her chest, “I’m currently winning with 16 higher graded assignments than Emma's 12.” She points at her teammate.
Emma frowns and rolls her eyes, “So when I heard that Don was hosting another season with 2 million dollars on the line, I realised this was my-“
“Our.” Courtney cuts in.
Rigidly, Emma continues, “-Our way of getting out of student debt and setting up my own firm.”
The veteran adjusts her hair, “Emma found out I had a lot of experience in reality TV and practically begged me to partner up with her.” Emma narrows her eyes.
“I did not beg.”
Courtney smirks. “She totally did.”
—————————————————————————————————————-
As the Lawyers join the roster, the two find themselves having very different conversations with certain contestants.
Josee is the first to start a confrontation with the Lawyer, pointing just mere inches from her face. “Just to make things clear, Lawyer Girl. We’re not going to go easy on you. In fact, I’ll make it my personal goal just to take you down this season.” Emma seems unconvinced.
“Wouldn’t expect anything less from a couple second place schemers. Oh wait, you didn’t even get second last season.” Her smile shines proudly.
“Drop dead.” The ice dancer growls.
“Didn’t know you guys were getting into witchcraft now, really desperate for that gold huh?” Emma tries to cover her laughter as she leaves.
As Jacques places a hand on Josee’s shoulder to help calm her down ever so slightly, the camera pans to Courtney awkwardly standing by until Geoff, Katie and Sadie stand around to talk to her.
Sadie waves her hand, "Heyyyy Courtney!! Just wanted to say I hold no resentment to the time you voted me off the Island, we're like, totally good now. Here! Have a free shirt!" She tosses a design to Courtney’s head.
Geoff laughs, “It’s totally awesome to see you again, Court! Haven’t seen you in like…forever!”
Courtney, a little confused as she holds the shirt, "Oh yeah, uh.. Thanks, Sadie! It's nice that you guys are here! It seems like all I ever had around me were enemies and- is that Scott."
At the mention of his name, the farm boy ducks his head, struggling to think of anything to say to her. Luckily, a convenient interruption occurs in the fact that this is a reality show and Don needs to still introduce more teams.
A young adult with a prominent beard and Afro steps to the rhythm of his headphones, beat-boxing stylishly along the way. Following him is a young woman, in awe of their talent and staring with starry eyes.
“Wow, Beardo!! I had no idea how great of a musician you were! It’s a good thing my great-great-great grandma was able to invent CD’s, before then people had to-”
Don, fearing disruption, “And, here comes everyone’s favorite First Boots, Soundboard Beardo and Chatterbox Staci!!”
Most everyone stares in confusion, “Who?” All while Scott facepalms.
“Oh dear God, not again…”
Leonard and Rodney quietly smile, “Hey, it’s Beardo-!”
“OH MY GOD I KNEW YOU WEREN’T DEAD!!” Everyone stares at Junior, including his mom who just gives a sheepish smile to the new contestants entering.
—————————————————————————————————————-
Interview: The First Boots
Beardo now wears comfortable headphones filled with stickers on his head at all times, as well as sporting a warm new sweater. Staci on the other hand has the same sweater on, however, it is slightly unzipped to reveal a preppy shirt.
“Bwomp.” Beardo pouts, staring at the ground.
Staci gently pats Beardo’s arm, “Hey, don’t worry buddy… I’m sure he didn’t mean any harm!!”
Beardo smiles shyly, with Staci directing the camera.
“To be honest, Beardo and I don’t really know each other that well aside from… well, being first boots in Total Drama. Which, gotta say, couldn’t you guys have given us a cooler name? Like… Maybe the Chatterboards!! Y’know, like chatter and soundboards? Which! Were invented by my great-great-great-great-great uncle Gary, before then, people had to memorize sounds!!”
Beardo, genuinely shocked, “Woah.”
—————————————————————————————————————-
“Wait! I-I didn’t mean it like tha-” Junior attempts to explain himself before Phoebe comes in to comfort him.
“It’s okay, hun. You can apologize later, okay?” She pats her son on the back as Staci guides a frowning, stressed Beardo towards the other teams. The chatterbox notices one familiar face and lights up.
“Hey, Scott!”
“Don’t talk to me.”
Oh okay. Guess we’re not doing happy reunions. But before things get incredibly awkward, a man live-vlogging with a woman emerges from the train and begins to approach the group. At the sight of the familiar braided purple hair, Courtney and Scott find themselves tense, tenser than usual at least, even Geoff, Katie and Sadie look a little intimidated.
“Hey hey all you racers! We’re live at Grand Central Station, where me and my lovely teammate Sierra are going to be kicking butt in this competition!” The vlogger energetically announces.
“Wow Topher, you’ve got such a natural way with the camera!” The woman, who is all the more known as Sierra, compliments her friend.
Don narrows his eyes, “A camera he shouldn’t even have access to.”
Topher huffs, putting the camera down. Sierra’s smile seems to widen even more somehow at the sight of Don. While Courtney, Scott, Katie, Sadie and Goeff look apprehensive at the sight of the girl that knows everything, the other Pahkitew Island contestants don’t quite know how to react to Topher returning. The other teams look even more confused as Topher seems to be bickering with Don over something while Sierra waits patiently.
Courtney, eyeing Sierra, “How the hell was she allowed onto this show?”
Emma crosses her arms as she stares at Topher, “He reminds me of Kitty… just way more annoying.”
Brody perks up, “Oh yeah! Like with the whole phone thing! How come she was allowed to use one?”
“It was a special phone given to her for the show, the only thing it could do was take photos.” Emma responds.
MacArthur chimes in, looking from afar, “That tall girl is freaking me out… if she tries anything I got my taser at the ready!” The officer is about to showcase said taser before Sanders cuts in.
“You CANNOT say that in a very public place.” Sanders looks at MacArthur disapprovingly.
Back to Topher and Don, who continue to be arguing over what seems to be his phone usage…
“Oh come on dad! We agreed to this-“
“DAD?!” Everyone else replies.
Don, dragging a hand down his face, “Topher and Sierra, the Superfans.”
——————————————————————————————————————
Interview: The Superfans
Sierra’s hair has now fully recovered, with her braid going to the middle half of her back as she has a sweater tied to her waist. Topher leans back in his chair, showcasing his long-sleeved turquoise shirt and light green pants that still go to his shoes.
“Yeah, Don’s my dad. I guess you could say I just come from a long lineage of super talented hosts. No biggie.” He shrugs.
“I’m surprised no one knew!! I mean, it’s basically common knowledge.” Sierra chuckles.
“What?”
Sierra immediately steps back, “I mean- Uh!! Common knowledge for anyone within your family that I had no access to at any point 2 years ago!” She smiles non-suspiciously.
“Okay.” Topher narrows his eyes.
——————————————————————————————————————
Scott seethes in place, “Are you kidding me?! We have the host's own son competing with us?!” He points sharply at Topher. Before the nepo baby could even say anything, Jacques agrees with the farm boy, “That has to be unfair!!”
Leonard confidently steps in. “This is just like when the Lord’s son joined us on our journey, only to steal the final kill from the great dragon and take all the glory!” He speaks with such power and anger.
Though, the other contestants mainly pause to look at the wizard. Tammy mutters something “people who have never played Dungeons & Dragons before” and the two sheepishly stare at the ground.
Don, holding his hands up defensively, “Now, now, I assure you there will be no bias here. Just because my son is competing, doesn’t mean I’m just going to hand the money to him for free.”
Topher nods, “Yeah! Besides, I’ve lived with that kind of money my whole life!”
He relaxes his hands behind his head, closing his eyes with a confident smile. The other teams mumble beneath their breaths, staring at the Superfans with furrowed brows. Sierra gently elbows Topher, smiling at everyone before silently shuffling the two of them away from the angry crowd.
As the tensions seem to already be rising within the teams, another pairing starts to walk out the train, one of the two seems to be taking photos of the impressive interior of the station, while the other seems to be quietly, and perhaps a little bit nervously, walking beside her.
“Man! It’s a good thing I’m good with maps, otherwise we’d be super lost! Emma can’t read subway maps for the life of her!” One of them says, the other laughs. “Well, then it’s also a good thing my sister isn’t here as well huh? She would probably get us both lost. On purpose.”
“Jeez that’s no fun at all! Oh! There’s Don and the others! Quick selfie!” The two pose for a picture, the more cheery one holding up a peace sign while the other is just smiling, even if she doesn’t look too confident about it.
Emma turns her head to the voices, one sounding suspiciously familiar and her eyes widen.
“Kitty?!”
Kitty whips her head towards her sister’s voice.
“Emma?!”
“I thought you said you weren’t competing?”
“And I thought you said that you weren’t competing!”
Kitty’s teammate awkwardly stands between the exchange, “Uhh-“
Courtney, raising a brow, “Is there a problem?”
Emma shakes her head, “No no, I’m just…surprised!”
Kitty smiles and pulls her teammate forward, she looks almost intimidated by the staring crowd but there’s a fire in her eyes. “This is Sammy, my teammate, and we’re-“
Don, sliding in to cut her off, “The Underdog Sisters!”
——————————————————————————————————————
Interview: The Underdog Sisters
Sammy rubs her hand to her arm, staring at the new set. Her comfortable buttoned up shirt along with her shorts make her stand out. Kitty wears a cardigan similar to Emma’s, only this time it’s bright red and fully open to reveal her shirt.
Kitty beams at the camera, “Sammy and I got into contact after I finished up season one of the race!”
Sammy jumps at the mention of her name, relaxing, “I really admired her confidence and how she didn’t let Emma walk all over her…so I messaged her and then we just really got to talking!”
Kitty nods, “I’ve watched through all the Total Drama seasons, so when I recognised who Sammy was, I was like ‘woah! This is a perfect team-up opportunity!’ And here we are!”
The nicer twin looks down, “I just hope I can make it further than I did in Pahkitew…”
Kitty raises an eyebrow before putting a hand to Sammy’s shoulder, “You totally will, plus I’ve also been dying to get more photos all around the world, so this is gonna be so much fun!”
Kitty takes another selfie with Sammy, both smiling.
——————————————————————————————————————
“‘Underdog Sisters’? You see yourself as an underdog in all of this?” Emma crosses her arms, Kitty lets go of Sammy. “It works for the dynamic Ems! You’re the cool, mature sister who’s off to be a lawyer and I’m the…less mature one! It’s like those teen slice of life movies we used to watch as kids!”
Emma rolls her eyes. “Oh for goodness sakes Kitty! You literally made it to the final four last season!”
“This isn’t about the final four! This is about how you’re the grumpy older sister and I’m the ever plucky and happy going younger sister!” Kitty pokes Emma’s face, sticking her tongue.
“I am NOT grumpy-”
While the two begin to squabble over…cheesy teen films? Sammy looks around to check the other competition, when she sees Rodney she sends a small wave his way, she seems to also be actively avoiding Topher’s presence.
Scott notices the exchange, “You know her?” His cousin jumps at Scott’s voice, quickly lowering his hand. “Hm? Yeah, kinda! She was the nice twin on Pahkitew.” Scott raises an eyebrow.
“Nice twin, huh. Good to know.”
Suddenly, a swarm of people storm the Grand Central Station in a hurry. Everyone has their cameras and phones out, chattering and flapping their arms around in excitement as a bright light emerges from the train door. The crowd is suddenly silent as two elegantly-dressed models walk out of the train, they take off their sunglasses and strike a pose, walking slowly towards Don and the other teams.
The fans erupt into a barrage of excited squeals and follow them once again, waving their arms and clicking their cameras. Some of them even faint.
“Anne Maria! Over here!” “Justin! Say hi to the camera!”
“Looking stunning as usual!!” “Can I have your autograph!?”
The crowd continues to follow them until Anne Maria and Justin make it to the waiting area, where everyone is then stopped by security. Don walks over just a few moments later. “Sorry, this area is for Ridonculous Race teams only! Feel free to check out the gift shop just next door though.”
As the crowd hurries toward the gift shop, Don turns back with a grin. “Here to make our show just a little bit prettier, welcome Anne Maria and Justin! The Beauties!”
Anne Maria and Justin’s hairs flow majestically and in slow motion, with the other teams staring in awe. The moment lasts for a while before Anne Maria takes out her hairspray, causing the spray to move towards the teams, to which they cough excessively.
——————————————————————————————————————
Interview: The Beauties
Both of them glimmer on screen. Justin wears a dark green shirt and silver collar that he keeps clean at all times. Anne Maria’s hair shines like never before, with a dark pink crop top along with diamond earrings that accompany her makeup.
Justin checks his mirror, “You know, ever since Action, I was a little angry for not being invited to join the World Tour along with my other cast-mates. Now? I couldn’t be more relieved to know that there’s another world tour waiting for me to join! And with no Chris to potentially damage my beautiful face, it was a miracle my model career survived after action!”
Anne Maria jumps, “I know! And ever since my totally unfair elimination on Revenge, I got smarterer and prettier, too! Mostly prettier, obviously. Didja see the camera crew? They couldn’t get enough of me!” She flips her hair.
“Us.” Justin points his mirror
Anne Maria, already filing her nails: “Yeah, sure.”
——————————————————————————————————————
Most everyone continues to cough, before Taylor gasps, quickly shaking her head before dashing towards Anne Maria along with her mom.
“Anne Maria?! Wow, it’s like, such an honor to meet you! My Mom’s a huge fan.” Confused, Kelly chimes in. “Haha, well- actually Taylor, you’re a really big fan of them too y’know-”
Taylor, interrupting, “Like I said. She’s a big fan.”
Staci shuffles to frame, waving to Anne Maria with a shy smile. Maybe this reunion will go smoother? “Hey, Anne Maria! Wow, your hair looks just as shiny as it was in-”
The Jersey girl spurns, “I’m sorry, do I know ya?”
Staci stares blankly in place, as if a million glass vases just shattered across her. She frowns before turning back to her teammate. Beardo gently pats Staci’s shoulder. Scott laughs at the exchange, leaning against Rodney as he snickers.
Anne Maria continues to talk with Taylor and Kelly, with Justin staying in place and checking himself in the mirror. Katie and Sadie watch from afar, clutching their fashion bags tight as they stare at Justin and then share a look.
“Sadie. It’s Justin!! And he looks just as handsome and famous as we remember!!”
“I know! Do you think he still remembers us?” Just as Sadie finishes asking that, Justin walks over to them. He smiles, looking down at their bags and taking a glamorous hat, he examines it before raising an eyebrow.
“Mind if I have this?”
“YES- WE MEAN- I MEAN- YOU CAN TAKE IT !” The BFFLs say in unison.
Justin puts on the hat, his hair sparkles as he leaves to join Anne Maria. Katie and Sadie follow his motion in place, squealing to themselves for another job well done.
Covering her ears, Anne Maria looks around and starts to get impatient. “So, when’s the flight coming? We got first-class tickets, right?” Don chuckles at this statement, waving his finger. “Oh no, no, no, no! There are still two new teams to introduce!”
The teams look at each other, confused. They stare at the train, awaiting for the team to arrive. Staci wonders if it’s another teammate from Revenge, Junior crosses his fingers for another Pahkitew contestant, and Courtney taps her foot in impatient stress. The next train finally arrives, circus music plays from inside as everyone squints.
There’s silence for a few seconds before someone does entire flips and turns while exiting the train, their soft shoes squeaking in and out as they cartwheel across the floor. They end their act in a perfect pose, showcasing their candy-covered natural Afro hair and colorful zipped up clown costume, smiling at everyone. A small, scruffy woman wearing an elegant sombrero soon joins, clapping at the performance.
Don respectfully claps, “Piñata and Tina, The Vegas Act!”
Most of the team clap at Piñatas performance, while others such as Scott just stare, unimpressed.
“Lovely entrance, Piñata! No notes, no notes at all!” The smaller of the two boasts.
Piñata bows. “Why, thank you Tina!”
——————————————————————————————————————
Interview: The Vegas Act
The first new team looks ecstatic to be here, Piñata especially as she shakes in place just to the right of Tina.
“I've been practicing that act all night!! I sure hope I didn’t squeak anyone’s ear off!” They pinch their ear, giggling.
Tina snickers, “Jaja, don’t worry about that, Piñata. I thought it was pretty good. Besides, what a way to make an entrance as a newbie, hm?”
The clown hops in their seat, “I know!! That’s gotta be a good intro!! Top ten for sure. But- I thought you were going to do your little performance too.”
“I did. I was behind you.” Tina pouts.
Piñata cringes, “Ooooohh. Looks like this game will be height-stakes for you then, hehe!!” They chortle at the joke while Tina furrows her brow.
——————————————————————————————————————
Under his breath, Scott scratches his chin. “Newbies, huh. Tricky.. but can be helpful.”
“Is that a- clown?” Kelly shudders, pointing at the candy-haired clown. Piñata turns around happily. “Piñata Confetti at your service! The one and only clown who can juggle hula-hoops on fire and jump through them!”
“Haha… Fun!” Kelly hides behind her own daughter. Piñata frowns a little before shaking the interaction off with a shrug. They then immediately catch the eye of a relative within the crowd, dashing towards their direction as they give Beardo a big ol hug.
“Bearrdooo!! It’s so good to see you here!! Lookit you, already with a new friend in the making!” They practically lift the tall contestant up as Staci watches. “You two know each other?”
Piñata puts Beardo down and gives her a pat on the back. “Yup! Beardo is my silly ol’ cousin! He basically taught me what it looks like to bring an actual smile to peoples faces while performing!”
A glimmering smile forms on Beardo's face, making Piñata grin back. “See? There’s the smile I’m looking for!!” They showcase their cousin's smile to a now starry-eyed Staci. “Awww!!”
Meanwhile, Rock is in awe of The Vegas Act’s performance, shaking Spud’s shoulder. “Dude! They’re like…from Vegas! That’s where we wanna go!”
His teammate blinks slowly. “We wanna go to Vegas?” Rock nods expeditiously. “Yeah! We wanna perform like benenedananadedew on the stages there!” He gestures an air-guitar.
“Oh yeah!” Spud replies, “Like that one guy in the suit!” The rockers once again break out into an air guitar solo as a repulsed Tina watches. “Yeah. I’m sure that’s just riveting for an audience…”
Stephanie scoffs at the newbies entering, “A bunch of clowns joining the show now? We’re gonna CRUSH-” Her fiance places a gentle hand on her shoulder. "C'mon Steph, deep breaths baby!”
Sighing, Stephanie calms down. “You’re right, we’re gonna have such a fun time! So long as we win.”
“Hm. I’ve seen better.” An elitist voice thunders the subway station, Tina darts her attention towards it. Her eyes simmer with rage at whoever dares judge such an act. The final subway train stops as the entrance seems to glimmer brighter than any sun.
They stride towards Don, with the clicks of their shining boots echoing across the walkway. One appears to be all dolled up in the literal sense, as if the color pink just invented itself right then and there with the primadonna's heart-shaped glasses and crop top that radiate a Barbieish lifestyle. Similarly, her companion also strikes a Ken-like posture. He accompanies her heart-shaped sunglasses with star-shaped ones. A slightly open-buttoned up Hawaiian shirt showcases his ascot pointing down to his expensive belt.
Everything about this new team radiated prime elegance and wonder. The two flip their flourishing hair and face the contestants.
“We've already done much better just by BEING here, Eugenie! Just look at us.” The primadonna states, idly playing with her hair. 'Eugenie' adjusts his collar, "Indeed. I'm glad the train didn't damage our outfits at all, especially yours. So crowded.."
“Oh, Eugene, I would never let that happen to you! Not after how much you spent on that shirt.” Every single team now seems to be preoccupied with the newbies that had arrived. Even Pinata, who had just finished a show-stopping act, couldn’t help but gaze towards them. Tina anxiously tugs on her collar.
Don lavishly extends a hand at the team, “Last but certainly not least, having won more medals and talent shows than you could count… It’s the Divas!”
“I’m sorry what.” Eugene’s pupils shrink as Echo looks unbothered.
——————————————————————————————————————
Interview: The Divas
“I-We never agreed to that name.” The rich man puts his hands to his hips, eyeing Echo, sitting eyes closed with a confident smile.
“Well, maybe you should have told me that before you had me write our team name down during sign ups.” She opens her eyes, pointing.
Eugene hums, “Fair point."
Echo smiles at him, “Aw come on! Eugene, I can't think of anyone I'd rather do this race with than a diva like you! I mean, I practically know more about you than your own dad! And that’s really saying something!” She chuckles.
Eugene smirks. “Hehe, I suppose if the name suits you, then it suits me, too. Just make sure to tell me the next time we have to write in our names for something. I already had my qualms about coming here."
Echo giggles, "No promises!~"
——————————————————————————————————————
Tina gets tired of tearing her collar apart. The tiny lady stomps towards Don in a huff. “Are you kidding?! They get a grand-overblown final entrance and descriptor while Piñata and I are cast aside to scraps?!”
Startled, Don uses his finger to push her back. “Hey, I don’t choose the order of teams, the train does. I just go with the flow of each duo.” Eugene soon walks past the two, “Probably meaning that your team’s flow was inadequate.”
This only makes Tina boil in place. “Like I’d take anything a jointed dress-up doll says to me seriously.” She narrows her eyes, muttering, “Inadequate I’ll show him inadequate…”
Piñata attempts to calm Tina down as we then follow Eugene making his way to the other teams. Most everyone seems to stare in awe at his swagger and outfit, with Jacques examining his physique especially. “Hey, Josee. Doesn’t that newbie look familiar to you?”
Josee takes only a few seconds to glance at the newbie before turning away. “Hmmm… No. Not really.” The other ice dancer continues to wonder, “I swear I know him from somewhere.” He squints his eyes, continuing to wonder while Josee stands perplexed.
As Jacques wonders about the familiarity of Eugene’s identity, others can’t help but turn their eyes towards Echo. Especially Scott, who seems particularly perplexed at the contestant’s appearance. “I’ve never seen so much pink before in my life.”
Rodney nods, “I know, and I’ve met Ella before! Guess pink’s just a pretty popular color, huh?” He grins as he looks down at a mesmerized Scott before shaking his head.
“More like pretty distracting, I’ll say. We need to focus. When’s the race starting?"
Don’s hands clap together, “Right now! I’m happy to be able to welcome back all nine returnee teams as well as meet the nine newbies here to compete in this race around the world. For each destination traveled, there will be a chill zone waiting for you, where each one of you will either get eliminated, or have a chance at winning two million dollars!”
All contestants start to cheer at the mention of the money. The Superfans and Surfers seem confident in their abilities to make it far in the race, while the First Boots and LARPers give each other apprehensive looks. The camera then follows Don as he strides towards the complicated illustrative map within the subway station, pointing at it, next to him stands the ever iconic Don-Box.
“To get our new teams familiar, this is a Don-Box, your guide around the world. Press this button on top-“ He clicks on the button, a travel tip slips out Don-Box’s mouth. “And you’ll receive your travel tips that will lead you through the Ridonculous Race!”
He picks up the first travel tip, reading it to the teams.
“You’ll all start here at the Grand Central Terminal in New York City. Each team must use the complex subway system to get to the Bronx Zoo, where the Don-Box containing the next travel ticket will be waiting for them.”
Rodney lights up at the mention of the location, clutching his chest slightly. Kitty as well, though she prepares her phone for the ride. Rock tightens his new bandana while Spud shifts his headphones on to focus.
“Are you ready, teams?”
The Goths continue to stand unamused by the competition once more. Just next to them are the ever so competitive Fiancer’s who are just itching to get started. Mother and Daughter look…actually determined? Junior checks on his mom, who looks absolutely ecstatic to be here.
“On your marks…”
The Cadets get into formation, eyeing the Ice Dancers’ plastic smiles. Emma and Kitty now bid farewell and meet with their respective companions. Courtney lightly claps her hands to her cheeks for some self-encouragement while Sammy stares anxiously at the map ahead. Justin continues to chat away to the BFFFLs, who giggle like they’re teenagers again, Anne Maria cracks her knuckles in determination.
“Get set…”
Tina glares daggers at Eugene, still annoyed by his comment earlier. Eugene doesn’t notice her as Pinata waves to Echo cheerfully. Scott eyes the competition ahead of him, paying no mind to Rodney’s excitement.
“RACE!”