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Your gender dysphoria came back as soon as you stepped foot back in Mondstadt. From being called the t slur by one of the knights (Varka took care of that one rather quickly) to people calling you feminine titles and misgendering you. The second the Nod Krai expedition team stepped back into Mondstadt, one of the knights that stayed behind welcomed you home, using the wrong title. Varka corrected him, yet it fell on deaf ears. You were still grateful for him sticking up for you.
It had been a week and a half since you first came back and you hated every second of it, yet you tried to act tough. Varka still noticed the shift in your demeanor. From watching you zone out after being misgendered, to catching you crying after one day of particularly mean comments, he knew what was going on, and he hated it.
He remembered how you were literally glowing with happiness in Nod Krai. The knights there had dubbed you the “manliest man to have come to Nod Krai” and would call you “Sir man” because they claimed it was faster than saying “Right hand man to the Grand Master”, which they weren’t wrong, and you really did appreciate all the extra care.
Word of this even reached Mondstadt, and Kaeya started writing you letters addressing you as “sir man knight sir” which you thought was very silly. Varka loved seeing you this happy. It was an entire different side than what he was used to seeing in Mondstadt, like a switch was pulled when you left, and now that you were back, that switch got pulled again.
It was hard for him to stick up for you since you’d told him on many different occasions that you didn’t want to ‘abuse your power as the right hand man by getting others in trouble over seemingly nothing’, yet it wasn’t nothing and he just wanted to have a conversation with them about their actions, no real trouble unless they kept doing it. You still refused since it wouldn’t be ‘manly’ for you to tell.
Your job as his right hand man was to keep all the other knights up to speed on recent information, and commands. Varka had also given you authority to punish the other knights just to see if you’d use it to defend yourself. Of course you didn’t, you were too afraid of what may happen to do that.
With all that being said, today was a really bad day. Since being back from Nod Krai all the action had calmed down a lot. You were in the knights of Favonius headquarters waiting for Varka in the library like he’d asked you to. While sitting at one of the tables trying to read a book about… yeah you weren’t actually reading, you just didn’t want to sit there awkwardly doing nothing so you were pretending to read something… anyway! While waiting for Varka you felt a presence standing over you. It was scrawny, you didn’t even have to look up to know who it was. Fucking Wilhelm. .
You tried to look busy but that didn’t stop him. “Lazy bitch. Of course your in here instead of out doing knight stuff like a real m-” you stopped listening for your own sake. He kept going though and every so often a word or phrase would stick out and it felt like a stab every time.
It went on for a while. He was ruthless and persistent. This was like a once in a lifetime opportunity for him. You were alone and no one would believe he was in the library because he was too stupid to actually read anything, so he was gonna get away with it. Or so he thought.
You were on the verge of tears. You didn’t want to be but you couldn’t help it. Your lip trembled, your eyes watered, and your breathing was uneven. He noticed this and just as he was about to mock you for crying a loud voice behind him started first.
“Wilhelm!”. You both jumped. You didn’t look up in shame of crying, yet you felt the man above you turn around, and you heard him trying to stutter an explanation. You didn’t need to look, you already knew who it was.
Before he could get anything out the other voice spoke again. “Since you seem rather talkative, why don’t you do the favor of gathering all the knights to the front of the Favonius headquarters. Send Jean in here while you’re at it. Now.” His voice was thunderous and commanding like you’ve never heard him before. You felt a tear slip out. The other man didn’t say anything, from the clanking of his armour it sounded like he nodded and rushed out.
You still wouldn’t look up. You couldn’t move at all, not wanting him to see you cry. Not wanting to seem weak in front of the man you admired most. Another tear fell. Then another. Then you couldn’t hold it in anymore. You started bawling, apologizing to the man in between sobs, your breathing uneven. He waited a couple moments for you to calm before speaking.
“You have no reason to be sorry, if anything I should be apologizing for allowing it to get this bad. I’m sorry Y/N”. He said as he pulled a chair out next to you, sitting on it. “It's actually the reason I wanted to meet you here. I was going to ask your permission first, yet I think I’ll have to step in whether you like it or not.” the man said, trying to sound gentle.
It took you a moment to process what he said. Once you did you looked up at him with tears running down your face “wait, what?”.
The man sighed before walking over to a box of tissues and sitting back down with them, wiping the tears off your face before speaking again. “We’ll talk once Jean gets here. How are you holding up? I know its been hard coming back. I’m sorry we had to leave Nod Krai”. He was trying to sound genuine because he was. He really was sorry you had to leave somewhere where you were so very happy. He was sorry his own knights were being disrespectful to you. He was sorry he hadn’t done anything about it sooner. He was sorry. Truly.
Just as you were about to respond, the library doors opened and in came Jean. You looked up at her but felt another tear slip out and looked back down before she could notice you crying. She stopped somewhere behind you, Varka told her to take a seat, so she did.
“Is everything alright? Why is he crying?” she asked with care. “I think its time we finally have that meeting with the rest of the knights. I sent Wilhelm to gather them on the steps of the headquarters.” He responded, still talking relatively quietly compared to how he usually speaks. Jean nods, “I see. Y/N, I’m sorry it took so lo-”, you cut her off “please don’t make this a big deal! I swear I can handle it myself. Please!”.
They both went quiet for a beat before Varka spoke up, “I’m sorry but its gone too far. We hate seeing you like this. You should feel safe and cared for in your own town. This isn’t right. It hasn’t been right for a while.” he tried to sound gentle yet firm.
After a moment of silence you finally nodded. “Fine, as long as I don’t have to be there… and Kaeya can miss it, I don’t wanna be alone.” they both eagerly agreed to your terms. “Whatever will make you comfortable. I’ll go get Kaeya.” Jean replied before standing up about to walk out. Varka stopped her. “Before you go,” he started, “I think it would be best if Wilhelm left the knights of Favonius”. Jean nodded before walking out to go get Kaeya.
Once she left there was a comfortable silence between you and Varka. You were still crying a bit but for the most part you’ve calmed down. “I promise you we have nothing but your best interest in mind. I think this meeting was a long time coming” he was trying to reassure you. “You know its not all the knights, right?” you replied. He nodded “I remember how happy you looked in Nod Krai.” “Youre not gonna punish anyone.. Are you?” you asked, worried. As much as you hated it, you were scared it would get worse if people actually got in trouble for it. He was quick to reassure you that, other than Wilhelm, this was more of a warning than an actual punishment. If it continues though, then you’ll talk.
After a couple minutes of comfortable conversation, and you calming down a lot more, Kaeya walked in, and came over. “My, I hope I’m not interrupting anything.” he said, in the same cocky way as he usually does. “Not at all! I was actually about to leave. The rest of the knights should be gathered by now. Be nice to him Kaeya!” Varka replied as he got up to leave.
Kaeya sat down beside you where Varka once was. “So what's happening with you? It looks as if you’ve been crying for hours. If I didn’t know any better I would be running after the Grand Master himself and demanding he make it up to you”. This earned a slight giggle out of you, which in turn made him smile.
You filled him in on everything that happened and what you Varka and Jean discussed. You almost start crying again, and he takes note of this, taking your hand in his and gently rubbing his thumb on your knuckles which does help to comfort you a bit. When you finally finish explaining a slight smile comes to his face, “I was pressuring Jean into doing something before you got back. I’m glad it's finally being taken care of. Albeit, later than I was hoping but at least it's getting done.” he said, softly. “I hope you know I’m proud of you.. Most of the knights are proud of you. It's not easy being you, but it doesn’t stop you from being amazing.” he adds.
You smile and hug him. “Thank you. For everything. From the letters in Nod Krai to just simply existing. I’m glad to have you in my life.” you replied. After a moment of hugging you both sit back down and make comfortable small talk, trying to distract yourself from the meeting happening outside.
After a while the doors to the library open, in came Albedo, Klee, and a new face which you assume is Durin. You looked for Albedo when you first came back to Mondstadt. He left a letter for you requesting to talk, yet he got busy with his new… brother? You actually weren’t sure if they were brothers but him and Klee aren’t quite siblings and refer to each other as brother and sister so you just assume all Hexenzirkel creations were connected one way or another.
You haven’t met Durin yet. When him and Albedo were in Nod Krai you were sent to inform the other groups of knights about the Rerir situation, then Columbina situation, then the evacuation, so on and so forth. It was nice to finally get a chance to meet him.
Klee ran down the library stairs, and you stood up. “Big brother Y/N!!!” she yelled as she jumped into your arms for a hug. You love Klee. Shes like a little sister to you. You hugged her for a moment as Albedo and Durin walked down the stairs. “I was looking for you” Albedo had the audacity to say. “So was I. Literally daily since we got back.” you retorted. “Ahh, my apologies. I ended up dealing with a few different assignments from my mother, and Alice. I meant I was looking for you today. Varka told me where you were after really laying it into the rest of the knights.” he responded. You cringed at the thought of Varka yelling at people on your behalf.
“Are the other knights upset at me?” you asked, a bit scared of the answer. “Actually, its the contrary. Most of them looked relieved that youre finally getting some justice. Believe it or not but more people care about you than you think.”. You couldn’t help but smile at this.
There was a pause in the conversation in which Klee finally broke the hug and ran over to Durins side. “Big Brother Y/N, this is big brother Durin!! He says he hasn’t met you yet and wants to be friends! Klee thinks you two would be amazing friends, after all youre both friends with Big brother Albedo and Big brother Kaeya, and with Klee!” she said as she tugged on Durins arm, trying to pull him closer to you.
“..hello” Durin finally spoke. He sounded both awkward, and Albedo picked up on this too. “Klee, make sure youre giving him enough space.” “Oh its okay, I don’t mind actually.” the dragon said, “so youre y/n, I’ve heard a bit about you. Its nice to finally meet you. I’ve heard a ton of nice things about you! The other knights say youre the manliest knight we have!”, you blush slightly at this. Before you respond you hear a booming voice from the door respond for you, “Its true!”. You jump not expecting him. “Welcome back sir.”, Kaeya says for you. You have no idea when he got there. Maybe he came in behind the others and you just missed him?
“How’re you holding up?” Varka asks, looking at you with a hopeful glisten in his eyes. “Much better actually. Thank you Grand Master.”. He gives you a smile, “anything for my right hand man! Now if you need me, I’ll be at the angels share! Be sure to join me later” he adds before leaving. You turn back to the others, about to try to make conversation but you got beaten to it.
“I actually have a proposition for you”, Albedo says, gesturing for you to sit back down. You both take a seat and he gives Kaeya a look, which he picks up. “Hey Klee, Durin, how about we go play Genus Invocation TCG at the cats tail? I just got a few new cards, I think Fischl is there.” he says as he stands, pushing his chair in. Klee jumps at the opportunity and pulls Durin along with her as the three walk out, you turn your attention back to the Alchemist.
Albedo starts, “I recently got an assignment from my mother and I think you’d be the perfect person for it”. The mention of his mother sends chills down your spine. You’ve heard stories of Rhinedottir before, as well as her assignments and experiments. Other than Albedo, nothing good comes from her. “...What assignment” you ask, fear evident in your voice. “As you may know, she usually experiments with life, and the biological structure of it. She recently heard word of you from Ms. Alice and assigned me to see if it's possible to change the structure of DNA to biologically change the gender of an already living thing. Its kinda like how your hormones are being changed by your medication, but a bit more complicated.” he finished, hoping it made at least a slither of sense to you.
With that, your eyes lit up with joy. “REALLY!?”.
He laughs slightly at your reaction. “Yes, if you’d allow me, I’d like to experiment using your DNA”. “Of course! I’d be honored to, thank you!” you beam, as if he’d just given you the world and everything in it.
“I’d also like to introduce you to a friend of mine in Sumeru. He’s in the medical field and recently did a successful surgery of changing another person's sex. I told him about you and he said he’d be willing to see you if you’d like him to.”, he added. You began to tear up again, this time in joy rather than in sorrow. “Are you serious?” you ask, more in shock than in disbelief.
“Yes. Only if yo-” he begins, yet you cut him off in excitement. “Please. I’d love to! Feeling comfortable in my own body is literally all I’ve ever dreamed of, I’d give anything!!”, Albedo nodded and gave you a slight nod, “I’ll reach out to him and let him know you're interested. In the meantime, if you're free tomorrow I’d like to draw a bit of your blood to start my own experiment.”.
You two arrange for a time to meet up to begin the experiment.
You nearly forget about Varka asking to meet you at the Angels Share, you were so excited from talking to Albedo it completely slipped your mind. Luckily you remembered before you went home.
You walk into the Angels Share and see Varka talking to Diluc. You haven’t seen Diluc since before you left for Nod Krai so it was a bit of a shock seeing him again. He smiles warmly at you, which Varka sees and turns around to see who he was looking at. “Well, ‘bout time you finally join us!”. “Sorry, Albedo and I started talking about experiments and it completely slipped my mind.”, “don’t be sorry, you look happy. Its a good look for you, I honestly started missing Nod Krai because of the lack of it”.
“Thank you Varka. For everything.” you take a seat beside him.
“Anything for my right hand man.”