Chapter Text
A small beam of morning light landed on the floor a few feet away from my bed, dust motes dancing through it. I lay there watching the particles catch the light. When I was a child Gran would tell me the stray particles were fairy dust.
Gran’s voice carried up the stairs on a familiar tune. No, not her voice, her mind. There were many things Gran excelled at, but like me singing wasn’t one of them. However, whenever she had a song in her head her mind’s voice hit the notes beautifully.
I tugged my frayed shields back into place, noting as I did so that there was no one else around. There was only Gran and me.
The clanging of pans echoed through the hall, making me painfully aware of a pounding in my head. In my mind’s eye, I had a flash of Diane’s wide smile, of Dawn’s vacant gaze. The tell-tale sound of the gas stove clicking over pulled me back to the present. It was struggling to catch alight.
Dawn had blood smeared on her chest.
I rose in the half-dark room, gingerly picking my way through the bedroom and out to the landing, making sure to avoid the creaky floorboard as I slipped into the bathroom. I pulled my hair back with an elastic. For a moment, it was all I could do to just stare at my reflection, at the stretch of flesh encasing my throat.
It was smooth and tanned. Unmarred. I ran a finger down the line of my neck, as though it would reveal what had been there the night before. There wasn’t even a scar. My eyes fixed on the pulse fluttering there. For a moment I had the strange sensation that it was something apart from me. I could almost see the outline of a moth, convulsing under my skin.
The microwave beeped and the spell was broken.
I stripped off, the clothes I’d worn to bed making a damp heap on the tiles. I inspected my body for some evidence of the night before.
There was nothing.
No bite, no scar, not even a smear of blood.
My knees wobbled as a wave of nausea swept over me. I squeezed my eyes shut and took a few deep breaths, leaning on the vanity, willing my heart to steady. My head was throbbing.
Crazy Sookie.
All my life I’d heard those words. Adults who thought I couldn’t hear them. Children who knew I could. My own mother, her thoughts awash with guilt. Maybe they were right, maybe I’d finally cracked it. I recalled my shower the night before. I had scrubbed at every inch of myself. Still, you couldn’t scrub away a wound.
I buried my face in my hands. The throbbing in my head crescendoed, causing me to pull back with a gasp.
The pain was radiating from the crest of my head. I parted the hair with gentle fingers. A bruise smudged the borders of my hairline, almost obscured by my hair. I could see Dawn, Lafayette and I piled into the backseat of my car like sardines. Diane’s leer as she turned from the front. The approaching car, my stab at freedom. The window rising to meet me.
I pressed. Pain shot through me down to my toes.
I didn’t imagine it. Relief washed over me, followed closely by horror.
I didn’t imagine it.