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It started with a hair tie.
A purple hair tie, to be exact, one of the knit ones that’s supposed to be more comfortable.
Abby wouldn’t know, because it wasn’t hers.
She found the offending hair tie while digging through Frank’s Civic one evening, desperately searching for the Paw Patrol figurine Penny hadn’t played with in weeks but now HAD to have.
Abby had reached her manicured hand between the center console and passenger seat, pulling up several goldfish, a pacifier from God knows how long ago…and a purple knit hair tie.
Abby settled onto her knees, passing the hair tie between her fingers. Her breath was caught in her throat as she made a mental list of who she knew had been in the car. Her, Frank, Penny, Tanner, of course. Frank’s parents over Christmas, but his mom had a pixie cut. Abby’s mom had been more of a fixture over the past year, but she would never set foot in Frank’s cluttered, old Honda. She preferred her Mercedes or Abby’s Lexus SUV.
That was it. End of list.
Abby took a measured breath and made a very intentional decision to forget about the purple hair tie. After months of tears, blame, arguments, therapy, ultimatums and slammed doors, Frank and Abby had reached a fragile ceasefire in their marriage. Abby wasn’t going to break it when she was sure there was a perfectly innocent explanation.
She did however, leave the hair tie on his seat.
By all accounts it was a successful family outing on Frank’s Saturday off. The kids made it through time at the playground without tears or blood, their Target run was relatively uneventful with only minimal whining for new toys, and Abby and Frank had managed to remain cordial the entire time. No snappy remarks, no digs whispered under breath, not even a rolled eye. Abby was in a pretty good mood.
Maybe that’s why at the end of it all, when the family had piled back into the SUV and Frank suggested stopping for Boba, Abby said “sure that sounds great!”
Abby had only had boba like, once or twice. As far as she knew Frank had never tried it, so it was a little surprising. After all, this was the guy who considered California Rolls exotic when they started dating. But, whatever, the kids would think it was cool.
Frank seemed to know exactly where he was going, and soon maneuvered into a tight space in front of an unassuming building called Tiger Sugar. Once inside, he held Penny in his arms with Tanner stuck to his side as he explained the different drinks, what boba was, the flavors they could add.
Abby should have been marveling at the moment between her husband and kids, admiring how patient and intentional he had become. Instead, she was wondering when the hell he became a boba expert.
“Dr. Langdon?”
A voice shook Abby out of her wondering as she turned to see a young woman with thick glasses, pigtails and a colorful crocheted bag approaching Frank excitedly.
“Becca! What are you doing here? Is Mel with you?”
Abby swung her head back to Frank as she searched the recesses of her memory for the names Becca and Mel.
“She’s trying to find a place to park, I got impatient so she dropped me off.”
The barista called out drinks for Frank, the kids and Abby. Frank effortlessly balanced all four without breaking eye contact with this mysterious Becca, as he asked her about a guy named Adam and what she picked for King Sisters movie night. Abby felt shaken. He obviously knew this woman that she had never met or heard of…and he was making no effort to introduce her, either.
“Speak of the devil!” Frank exclaimed, his blue eyes lit up like a kid’s on Christmas. He was looking past Becca at the door, where another young woman in glasses had walked in. This one had her hair pulled into a high ponytail, baggy fit jeans and converse. Abby’s mom would say she was “nothing to write home about”, but Franks expression would disagree.
“Frank! What are you doing here?”
This woman, who must be Mel, hopped up to Becca, fitting her hand around her elbow and warmly smiling at her husband.
Oh, there it was. That smile. That was definitely something to write home about.
Frank suddenly remembered that he was at the Boba shop with his family.
“Oh! We were out running errands and I thought the kids would get a kick out of boba…Mel, Becca these are my kids, Tanner and Penny, and this is…Abby. Abby, this is Dr. Mel King, we work together at the hospital, and this is her sister, Becca.”
Mel stuck her hand out earnestly and grinned at Abby. “It is so nice to finally meet you, Abby!” She knelt down to get eye level with the kids. “Tanner, Penny, your dad talks about you all the time! I feel like I know you already!”
“It’s nice to meet you Mel, Becca.” Abby replied politely. Mel seemed genuine and harmless. Her sister had stepped off to the side and eyed Abby suspiciously.
Mel though…she was the human embodiment of a ray of sunshine. She did nothing to make Abby feel possessive of her husband, there were no longing gazes or hands lingering where they shouldn’t. Abby listened as Mel talked about their plans to watch Elf tonight and even chuckled when she said she would rather perform a manual fecal disimpaction than watch it again. Mel was just another doctor that her husband worked with that was coincidentally at the same boba shop.
Abby and Frank wrangled their children and headed for the exit, bidding goodbye as the King sisters headed to the front counter. Abby shook her head, feeling silly at how shaken she felt minutes before.
She glanced behind her one last time before she followed her family to the car, and that’s when it caught her eye. So small, so innocent, nestled discreetly in Mel King’s dirty blonde ponytail.
A purple hair tie.
After a nuclear blow up about boba, Mel and the purple hair tie, Abby was left feeling like a complete asshole.
The hair tie was Mel’s, but Frank swore she had never been in his car to leave it there. During one of his early shifts back after being reinstated, Frank said he found himself triggered by Robby’s indifference towards him and an R2’s outright scorn. After ordering lorazepam for a college student with unexplained seizure activity, the craving for a pill was becoming stronger by the minute. Frank was trying to reach his sponsor when Mel found him in pacing in the stairwell. She used some of the same deescalation strategies she used with Becca to bring Frank to a place where he could reason, and she listened as he listed everything that had brought him to the stairwell that day.
Mel took the extra hair tie off her wrist and handed it to Frank. She told him to use it as a fidget or a negative reinforcement when he thought about relapsing.
Like Abby said, she was a giant asshole.
The great hair tie debacle evolved into an irate Frank accusing Abby of again not trusting him. Abby dared to remind him of the months of lies that supported her suspicions. It just circled and circled from there. Same argument, different day.
That had been weeks ago. Abby really did feel bad. She had tried to make it up in the ways she knew how. Making his favorite chicken parm for dinner. Not rolling her eyes when he put the Pirates game on. Refraining from snide comments when he came home later from work or left unexpectedly because something came up at the hospital. She was trying, really.
So when Frank spent Friday evening with his eyes glued to his phone instead of engaging with her, Abby decided to keep her mouth shut. She didn’t mention anything when Frank kept checking his messages during dinner at the local pizza parlor. She turned a blind eye when he he must have finally gotten what he was waiting for and a smile spread onto his face as he replied under the table. Abby didn’t question why he brought his phone everywhere and always placed it face down. She even pretended not to notice when kids were asleep and the couch cushions vibrated every 3-5 minutes during their therapy advised “date time” while watching a movie. Frank’s eyes were darting to the phone with every buzz, like it was pure torture to not respond to whatever sirens song was drawing him in. Abby couldn’t decide if he thought she was blind or stupid, the way he started hiding his phone under a blanket to respond.
However, after the past few weeks, she had resigned herself to silence. She wasn’t going to be the asshole again.
The movie ended and the pair began the emotionless ritual that had become replaced their once passionate and intense love life. Lights off, shirts on. Kissing, but nothing like the desperate, animalistic ones that had devoured her body before. Missionary, quiet, efficient.
When Frank finished and rolled off of her, he always placed a light kiss to her forehead. It was almost like his way of telling her, “I love you, but I’m not in love with you. I care about you, but I don’t care about this.”
Abby wished he would say it out loud, because then she could tell him she felt the same way.
They tolerated a couple minutes of pretending to cuddle in the aftermath of passionless sex and Abby let her mind wander to the early days of their relationship. When she had begged him to fuck her on every surface of their shitty apartment. When she didn’t feel complete unless he was inside her and licking her skin and telling her how good she felt. When they almost got caught in the UNC library study room because their desire overcame any and all sense of logic.
Abby was trying to pinpoint when those feelings had stopped when she felt Frank heave himself off their bed and into the bathroom to clean himself off.
His phone traveled with him.
Abby let herself ruminate on Frank and his phone until he returned, and then when she took her turn to shower and change into clean pajama shorts and and old tee shirt. By the time Abby opened the door to their bedroom, Frank was asleep and softly snoring. So soundly asleep that he didn’t notice Abby grab his phone from his nightstand and tiptoe backwards to lock herself in the bathroom again.
Fingers shaking, she typed Franks passcode in. At least he hadn’t changed that.
She scrolled through his messages. His mom, dad, brother, Abby, Dana, his sponsor…there was nothing incriminating there.
Recently deleted messages-Nothing other than spam.
Facebook messages, Instagram, email. Nothing. Nothing. Nothing.
Abby even searched for hidden apps. Nothing.
Her stomach still felt unsettled, but there was nothing there. She was about to place Franks phone back on his nightstand when it buzzed in her hand, making her jump in the dark.
There was an incoming text: Mel King
Abby felt her knees shake.
She just looked. There had been no conversations with Mel.
She swiped to read the text. It could still be innocent.
You’re sweet to say that. I’m going to bed too, sleep well! Talk to you tomorrow.
Abby dropped the phone like it was made of acid and stared at the man asleep in her bed.
She was running out of excuses for him and their marriage.
It’s amazing what we’re able to talk ourselves into and out of.
Abby was able to convince herself that again, the text from Mel was completely innocent, just like everything else, that Frank deleted their conversation to avoid another stupid argument over nothing, and their marriage was fine, just fine, thank you very much.
Ignorance is bliss, or at least passable contentment.
At a certain point, however, when confronted with visual evidence, not even the most delusional mind can deny what is reality.
That was what happened on a Wednesday morning in October. It was Abby’s idea of a perfect day. Not a cloud in sight, the leaves starting to turn, a crisp chill in the air but the sun still shining down. Her meeting with a client over coffee had ended early, and the coffee shop was located right across from a park with a nice walking trail. Abby sipped the remnants of her latte and looked out at the park, wondering if she had time to take a lap or two, when a familiar looking dog caught her eye.
“Bodhi?” she said to no one in particular, straining her eyes to see if the yellow goldendoodle was indeed hers. Or rather, Frank’s.
Sure enough, her husband was attached to the other end of the leash. She immediately recognized his gray UNC hoodie and faded Pirates ball cap. Wasn’t he supposed to be at work today? He told her he had picked up a shift for Cassie…
Abby reached for her phone to call him when suddenly it all made sense.
Mel.
His arm was wrapped around her. Just draped over her shoulder casually, like he had done it a hundred times before. She looked up at him with a grin Abby could see from the coffee shop. They stopped and waited for Bodhi to sniff a tree and looked at each other like they were the only ones in the park, the city, the universe.
Abby didn’t remember standing up or leaving the coffee shop or crossing street to the park. Somehow, she must have though, because she was following her husband and another woman from a safe distance, observing their every move and mannerism.
Franks arm stayed resting on Mel’s shoulder, occasionally finding the end of her braid to twirl in his fingers. Abby couldn’t hear their conversation but she could they were both listening intently to whatever the other was saying. Mel’s hands occasionally flew up in animated motions which made Frank throw his head back in a laugh. Abby could picture the corners of his eyes crinkling in delight-something she hadn’t seen herself in so long.
When a pair of rollerbladers came barreling toward the pair, knocking Mel over and sending Bodhi into a frenzy, Frank was immediately crouched at her side, cradling her head in his hands gently and inspecting her for the smallest scratch. When he was satisfied that Mel was unharmed, Frank cupped her hands in his and brought them to his lips before helping her up. Mel leaned into Frank like they were meant to fit together, brushed her legs off, and they continued on.
Abby felt tears prick the corners of her eyes. The man in front of her was a stranger. It had been so long since he had looked at her or held her with a fraction of the love he showed for Mel. Love that Abby could feel yards away from them. Love that was visible with no context.
The truth Abby had tried for so long to push down and explain away was too loud to ignore anymore.
It was never just a hair tie.
Three years had passed.
Abby and Frank’s divorce was much more amicable than the last two years of their marriage had been.
It turns out that when you accept the truth that both of you deserve happiness and love that you’re no longer receiving in your marriage, it’s a little easier to let go.
Abby was picking Tanner and Penny up from weekend at Frank and Mel’s house. It was a beautiful red brick Victorian in Squirrel Hill that just seemed to be perfectly Mel.
Abby tried to hate her in the beginning, but she soon realized you can’t hate Mel King. She was warm and genuine and never overstepped her boundaries. When Abby asked Frank for a divorce and he came clean about his feelings for Mel, Mel asked to meet Abby and clear the air. Somehow at the end of the meeting, Abby understood how her husband fell in love with the brilliant, awkward woman with the tragic life story and positive outlook on life. Abby fell in love with her too.
Frank peeled Tanner and Penny from Mel’s waist and they kissed their baby sister goodbye one last time before piling into Abby’s car. Tanner bubbled over with excitement about going fishing with Frank and finishing a Star Wars Lego set with Becca. Penny crawled into the passenger seat to show Abby the intricate braid Mel had woven into her hair.
Tiny little flower clips were nestled into Penny’s hair, smaller braids were twisted and roped together like a maze, tied together between Penny’s shoulder blades…
with a purple knit hair tie.