Chapter Text
Have you ever stopped to think about how suddenly your life can change? One morning, I woke up as a run-of-the-mill accountant with the very normal hobby of charging headfirst into abandoned buildings. One impulsive putting-on-a-strange-headset later and poof, I became a scrungly cartoon jester stuck in a “digital circus,” going on adventures with a bunch of discount Looney Tunes extras while trying my hardest to keep the inevitable existential crisis at bay. Also, the giant talking teeth-and-eyeballs in a top hat christened my new self “Pomni,” a name that doesn’t mean anything in particular. I think?
It took a couple months, but I finally started getting used to living in the big top… and then everything got turned upside-down again. Putting the circus back together after the incident was a ton of work, but nothing a tight-knit group of best friends forever couldn’t handle… Sigh, the thing about being an abstract girl living in an abstract world is that you can do anything, go anywhere, and be anyone you want, if you think it’s possible. Total freedom, and total decision paralysis. If you stop trying to hold yourself together, you start to go crazy. And if you start to go crazy, bad things happen…
“Yawn, g’morning Pomni, something bothering you?” Ragatha rubbed her eyes and slid the blanket off of her. She scooched over to the side of the bed, sitting right next to me.
“I’m just… reminiscing, I guess.” My bedroom hasn’t changed that much – chandelier on the ceiling; big, comfy chair in the corner; vanity with spare jester hat. The space is a lot tidier than it used to be. All the clutter was driving the neat-freak beside me batty. “It’s crazy, isn’t it? It’s only been nine months, but those days already feel like a distant memory. You don’t have any trouble remembering what the old circus was like, right?”
“Uh-huh. Wake up, find out what fresh shenanigans awaited us, eat, sleep, repeat. I kept that routine for a whole decade, and somehow never lost my sanity. Must’ve been all that mental resilience I built up as a kid.”
“Caine’s adventures weren’t the worst thing ever. We had some good times.” A warm smile grew across my face. “Remember when Kinger and I got sent to literal hell? Or Gangle going buck-wild with the tommy gun? And during the softball game, you guys made…” The warmth dissipated.
Ragatha put her hand over mine. “Pomni, are you okay?” I stood up, walked over to the vanity, and picked up the plush hare sitting there. Once Kinger had taught me how to conjure too, I added a few things to my room’s decor. I couldn’t stand the thought of forgetting about… her. A pair of arms hugged me from behind. “You really miss him, don’t you?”
I rubbed the doll’s soft, purple fur, gazing into its big, round eyes. “Do you think he’d enjoy the circus, the way it is now? If he hadn’t… y’know…”
“Probably. Though, knowing him, he would’ve needed some time to adjust.”
“Frankly, we all did. The circus really is our world, and will be… forever.”
“Living forever isn’t so bad if you have someone nice to spend it with.” Ragatha leaned down and pecked my cheek. She squeezed me tighter, and my frown wavered into a reluctant grin.
“Thanks, Ragatha. What would I do without you, best friend?”
She rolled her eyes. “Sigh, goddammit Pomni…”