Chapter Text
Ruby and her team and team JNPR plus other teams and parents had gotten a note.
“Where are we? I knew we shouldn't have listened to that note…” Weiss muttered.
“Hey guys, look, that's a big TV…” Ruby pointed.
“Ugh, where in Equestria are we!? And… my hands…” a purple human said.
I'm human, is this place connected to the human world?
Twilight thought.
“Twilight!” A Sunset themed girl hugged her.
“Is it me or am I seeing double of those people?” Yang pointed out.
“You're not the only one.” Blake replied.
“Well this might get confusing, okay so… I'll call human Twilight, Sci-Twi, Dashie, Jackie, Rare, Trix, Principle Celestia and V.P Luna, Mena(Pinkie Pie), Bulks, Flutters.” Sunset nicknamed the human counterparts.
“Also, maybe we should be on opposite sides if we're gonna be here a while.” Twilight said.
“¿Qué carajo? ¿¡Dónde estamos!? (The fuck? where are we!?)” A girl in a colorful dress asked.
“Isa… can you calm down, please?” A girl with green glasses asked.
“Sorry, Mira.” Isa's eyes softened.
—-------------------------
Now that everyone was settled, they didn't know what was going to be displayed.
Everyone either has a red aura, purple aura or a blue aura and it's overwhelming…
Alex thought.
Steph was talking to Chloe, an old school mate of hers.
“Hey, are you okay?” Max, who might be Chloe's girlfriend, she doesn't know, asked.
“I'm fine.” Alex answered.
Mane 6 & h!Mane six
“I'm so excited, are you guys!?” Mena asked.
“I am!” Pinkie exclaimed to her counterpart.
Remnant residents.
Hopefully I don't have a panic attack, I've been having a lot of those later…
Ruby thought.
The screen lit up.
Deadline.
“Being a teenager is hard enough, but hating yourself while being a teenager makes things harder. Follow Ruby Rose, a newly realized transgirl, as she embarks on the journey of discovering who she really is, all while keeping it from her dad. She'll take things a day at a time, but how long will her luck last? For all things will come to light in due time...there's always a deadline (in this case, a beach trip in June).”
“Keeping it from? Just like here huh?” Taiyang looked sad at the fact, his little girl couldn't tell him about her new self that was happier than the first.
“Hey Ruby, breathe with me, you can do that right?” Weiss grabbed ahold of her partner's hand.
Words were being thrown at her in her head.
Freak!
Tr*nny
D*ke!
You're supposed to stay the gender you were given.
Ruby buried her face in Weiss's chest.
I'm guessing she's also trans here, like me.
Sunset thought.
“Freak…” everyone almost missed it and wondered who said it.
“The fuck did you just say Cardin?” Blake got up to go deal with Cardin and his team.
Coco,her team,Yang and team JNPR went over.
“Ooh… I think one of them let out a girly scream.” Rumi pointed out.
“I heard it.” Mira was trying not to laugh.
Everyone sat down.
“I'm not gonna lie and say they didn't deserve that.” Isa smirked.
(Who would like to read first?)
The book appeared floating over a totem.
“I'll go.” Blake stood up and went to the front.
TW: dysphoria, body dysmorphia, counseling
“At least it gave us a warning.” Mira muttered.
Chapter 1: be true to yourself
Rose sat in a well-lit waiting room. The sixteen-year-old had asked their dad to get them a psychiatrist due to some strange thoughts and horrible feelings. Rose didn’t know what was going on quite yet, but had a feeling that Dr. Naumann would be able to help to figure it out. Dr. Naumann had helped their older sister, Yang, through grieving her mother as a young child and later with anger management issues as she became a teenager. It wouldn’t be a stretch to say Taiyang trusted her to help his child out.
Maybe a psychiatrist would have helped me with my… problems too?
Yang thought.
Rose exhaled softly, they always hated going to the doctor. The hard truth was that Rose had been uncomfortable in their own skin as long as she could remember. “You’re too short,” said the doctor, but Rose felt too tall. “Underweight,” another doctor says, Rose exercised and ate plenty. Puberty didn’t hit until later, so it didn’t matter as much. A groan came out as Rose tried to piece things together in their head. It never worked though, thanks to what was presumably horrible depression and anxiety.
Every team who adored Ruby were worried for the one in this au.
“Ugh...I hate this clean smell….” Rose coughed as the ammonia in the cleaning solutions singed their nose hairs. “So rank and it makes me feel like my lungs are burning. Like all of me is on fire or something…” The red-tipped dark brunette slightly smirked at their own joke, combing their thick hair with their hands to try and calm down, only to jump as a voice called out to the near-empty waiting room.
“Rose?” The soft, kind voice of one of the nurses called their last name out. Rose had requested not to be called by first name, the normal practice of the office.
“C-coming!” Rose called out, dashing over to the nurse. The young lady who had called out to the patient could have sworn she saw rose petals for a moment. “I-I’m here!” Rose said softly, trying to avoid a deep voice. Rose had always hated that, though thankfully it wasn’t as deep as their father’s or uncle’s...yet.
“Yeah, I wouldn't want that either.” Sunset said.
Though… I was already almost one in Equestria.
“This way.” The nurse led Rose down a carpeted hallway with a few doors here and there. Rose could hear keys clicking and the hum of the lights above her as there was next to no noise anywhere else in the office; all the offices here were soundproofed for confidentiality reasons. “Right in here Rose, Dr. Naumann is inside.”
Rose nodded, taking a deep breath and going inside. The scent of the room was all too familiar, rose petals with a hint of lavender. The distressed teenager was speechless for a brief moment. A giggle escaped as Rose sat down on the soft couch next to whom they assumed was Dr. Naumann. “I-I’m going to guess my father told you about the..uh scent?” It had to have been him, since that was Rose’s comfort and nostalgic scent combination.
Dr. Naumann chuckled softly and nodded. Her voice spoke like an oracle of wisdom to Ruby, calm yet confident, not too loud yet demanding her attention politely. “He did indeed. Taiyang mentioned that his second child had been having issues, and that you were always more open to discussion if this was available for you to smell. I hope that’s not crossing a line, my dear.”
All those years of hating doctors and doctor’s appointments… they didn’t matter anymore. Rose knew that this woman was going to help, as if the praise that their older sister Yang had given her wasn’t enough for her to know. A simple head shake responded to the question hanging delicately in the air. “No it’s fine actually, I-I actually feel like I can breathe for the first time in a couple months.” The feeling was freeing to the youth laying on the couch, as if some part of their worries were already gone.
“Well let’s begin then. I see here you requested not to be called by your given name. And I’m curious as to your lack of pronouns and given name listed. There’s just a bunch of dark scribbles over what is listed as your birth sex. I’m not going to assume anything here, but would you mind giving me a name please? What do you prefer to be called?”
That question hit Rose like a ton of bricks. Their eyes almost glazed over as she attempted to process the question. What do I like being called? The internal voice was screaming for a long moment and returned a familiar name, Ruby. Rose had been using it lately as character names in sex-locked clsses in an MMO they tried out, and as a username on a couple of other games. If memory served, it was what their father said her name would have been had they been born a daughter and not a son. “I….I think it’s Ruby. I-I’ve been going by that online in games for about a year...a-and…” Ruby paused, unsure if they should continue.
“You know it's weird because Yang knew I was trans before I did.” Ruby laughed at that.
“I raised you, so yeah.” Yang said.
Why is a kid raising another kid?
Rumi thought.
Dr. Naumann was careful writing notes while maintaining a watchful eye over her patient. “By all means dear, please keep going. Nothing you say here is stupid or bad information. It will all help me help you.”
Surprisingly the encouragement helped a lot, as they hadn’t been very confident in answering questions in class at school either. Ruby took another breath and continued as requested. “And I’ve been avoiding playing male characters as much as possible the past couple of months.” The sixteen-year-old didn’t stop there. Just a few days ago had been their birthday, and Rose was already feeling better, even with just a few sentences spoken, and couldn’t figure out why. Ruby’s brain went on autopilot to continue answering, as if genuinely answering the question. “I-I just feel so fucking gross all the time. I look in the mirror, see the stubble on my face or my chest hair starting to grow and I just want to rip it all out. I don’t wear anything but loose hoodies and baggy jeans because of how much I hate my body…” Ruby’s mind desperately jumped between thoughts, attempting to find something positive. “Th-though I have these really cool combat boots I got on sale a few months ago! I-I got home and after I wore them a few times, Yang told me they were women’s boots. I kinda shrugged it off at the time, but…” The realization was yet another ton of bricks, or perhaps five tons, that fixed the damage done by the first ton. “H-holy fuck...Dr...Dr Naumann...I’m a freak...I want to be a girl. Th-that’s not manly at all! H-how fucked up is that? I-I just want to…”
Blake felt a little disgusted, because it felt like she was calling Ruby that and she didn't like that.
Ruby’s rant was cut off by Dr. Naumann placing a gentle hand on her shoulder. “Now now, you’re not a freak. This isn’t uncommon, you know. There’s even well-defined terms for this, though we’ll walk through each of them to see what fits.” Ruby’s nod was all she needed to continue. “Body Dysmorphia, gender dysphoria, transgender.”
The words didn’t mean much to Ruby, but she could kind of get a vague idea of what the first one was. “Uh… I don’t really know what any of that means Dr. Naumann… I-I’m sorry…” Her voice seemed dejected and almost upset, her internal voice telling her that she should have already known this.
Dr. Naumann was there for Ruby. She moved a bit closer. “Ruby, you look like you’re about to cry. Would you like a hug? If not, we can work on some exercises to help with these panic attacks.”
I wonder…
Weiss thought.
“Are those what your panic attacks are normally about?” Weiss softly asked.
“Sometimes. I get panic attacks because of the way I look.” Ruby muttered.
Ruby hesitated. She'd never had an issue hugging Yang or Blake, or her father or even her uncle. But someone she just met? The voice kept popping up in the back of her mind: You’re just doing this for the attention, Dr Naumann doesn’t really want to hug you. But Ruby shook that thought away. That thought at the back of her head needed to go, at least now for. Over the few seconds that Ruby was thinking about the hug, tears started to return to her eyes, followed by a nod and a barely audible “yes”.
Dr. Naumann moved over and wrapped her arms around Ruby for a moment before adjusting them to where Ruby’s head could lay on Dr. Naumann’s shoulder. This worked out since Ruby was relatively short for her height, clocking in at just over 157cm (5ft2in~), and Dr. Naumann by comparison was over 184cm (6ft0.5in~) tall. “There there, it’s going to be alright. We don’t always know everything. That’s why we ask questions and learn.”
Ruby poured her heart out over minutes, as the sobs turned to tears and those turned to sniffles. The seconds dragged by for her, but finally she was able to breathe normally. “C-can we stay like this? I-I….I feel safer like this.” Ruby’s voice had been stronger and louder when she first got here, but had since become more timid and less audible. Her voice was quiet now, barely above a whisper.
The request wasn’t uncommon for Dr. Naumann as she nodded softly. “Of course. If it helps you feel better and helps us figure out what’s going on, it’s not a problem, Ruby.”
Blake stopped reading and went to hug Ruby.
“I guess I'll read.” Chloe got up.
The last word stuck with Ruby. It was her name, her name. Not some name she held no attachment to, but hers and hers alone. It felt good to hear it, even if she’d effectively picked it out mere minutes ago. “Can you say that again? M-my name I mean...i-it made me feel...good for the first time in awhile.”
“Ruby. You are safe, and you are loved. Ruby, you are Ruby and not who or what anyone else says you are. You are Ruby .” The emphasis on the last word was important, as it was a technique that Dr. Naumann had developed for those individuals who had gender identity issues and the like.
Ruby was already starting to feel better. She felt confident in her name now. “I-I...I am Ruby Rose...and I think I-I’m a girl. Is that ok?”
Dr. Naumann smiled, though Ruby couldn’t see it yet with her head still resting on the doctor’s shoulder. “Of course Ruby. If that’s how you feel, you are. You are a girl, you matter, and you are valid. No one can change that.”
A sigh of relief escaped from Ruby’s mouth. All these thoughts, all these emotions, everything, were starting to make sense. Still, she wanted to know what was going on with her. This wasn’t uncommon apparently, but she’d never heard of a boy who wanted to be a girl before. Well not besides little kids, but they’d say a lot of silly things. “Ok, I think I’m ready to figure things out.” Her words came out softly, but more confident than she’d spoken so far. “I-I think I’m good on the hug...for now...” Admitting that caused Ruby’s face to turn a light pink as a blush spread across her face. But still even as she was embarrassed, she stood up from her doctor’s lap so they could both return to their previous positions.
After a brief shuffle, the two continued talking. Dr. Naumann continued the conversation, addressing Ruby once again. “Now Miss Rose, are you ready to start figuring out who you are?” A nod was received in response, along with another blush at being called ‘Miss’. “Let’s start at the top and work our way through. Do you hate looking at yourself in the mirror? Do you hate the clothes you wear? Do you wish you looked different?”
Oh wow, several questions...b-but I think I can answer them . Ruby gently popped herself in the face on her cheeks to hype herself up enough to answer. “Y-yeah I really don’t like looking at myself in the mirror, I feel so nasty and wrong. B-but I don’t always hate the clothes I wear? L-like this hoodie!” Ruby gestured to her black hoodie with a red rose on the front. “I-I really like it. Dad got it for me last year for my birthday. He...he told me the rose was drawn by my mom...and it’s my last name too and I love it. Yang kinda teases me about it being a bit too cute, but I never really minded it.” It felt good to say that. “I...stole one of Yang’s skirts a few days ago and tried it on. I-It was too big for me unless I wore a belt. But including my boots and my hoodie I kinda liked the way I looked for the first time. And yeah I wish I looked different. Dad says I’m not done with puberty and my face hasn’t come in all the way, but I have dark facial hair and my jaw feels a bit too sharp. I don’t mind being small, I guess because I wanted to be cute? And I don’t weigh a lot, though I’ve got a bit of toned muscle and I kinda like that.”
Facial hair… it may be for both genders but for some reason, it feels masculine.
Romance thought, he wasn't trans but he didn't really like looking too… masculine either.
Dr Naumann never stopped looking at Ruby, able to write down everything needed to keep things going. “I see, do you remember any event where you felt like it’d be better if you were a girl, Ruby? For example, I’ll tell you about one of my other patients. She’s transgender, male to female. She told me about when she was growing up, around the Solstice season and Sowing Day where all the stores would have cute dresses out for the girls to wear. Their parents would get to dress them up, but she never got that. She always had to wear suits and stuff. She told me she’d long to wear one of the dresses, even just for a few minutes. Does that sound familiar?”
Ruby nodded without question. “Y-yeah actually, I go to the mall a lot with Yang when she goes shopping. I just kinda..tag along to get out of the house. She does shop for clothes and teases me about dressing me up since I’m there. I...I always wished she would.”
The doctor shifted slightly in her chair and moved on. “So tell me about your relationship with Yang. I know her well since I see her once a month, but I want to know about how the two of you interact. Is she caring or antagonistic? Does she comfort you? Or even just talk to you and listen?”
That wasn’t even something Ruby needed to think about. “Yang is great! I...I couldn’t ask for a better sister.” Ruby started off super excited and calmed down, thinking about how much Yang loved her. “She’s super supportive with whatever I get into. Like I just started gaming on PC a year and a half ago? I was playing on her old laptop which wasn’t great, and I’d complain occasionally how I wish I could get a job or something and build my computer.” Dr. Naumann raised an eyebrow, curious as to where this would go. “A-and for my birthday that year, she made me get up early and wouldn’t tell me why. She had talked to Jaune, he’s my friend and knows way more about computers than I do right now, and took me to this computer store over an hour away in the middle of Vale. I didn’t have much cash, about $200 from my birthday and doing extra chores for Dad. I didn’t know what to do, but she handed me a card right after we walked in. Yang, Dad, and even Uncle Qrow all chipped some money in, though Yang did the most by far, $600. Dad and Uncle Qrow matched that together. I started crying right there...took me a few minutes to stop and then I went ham!” A few giggles left Ruby as she remembered the fond memory. “She said it was a lot of fun even if she didn’t know much. Then I built Crescent Rose when I got home. She’s also powerful enough for me to draw digitally on so I took what money I had for a tablet while I was there. She...didn’t do anything much this year for me at least yet, but that’s ok! She did a lot last year and we got to spend the whole day together playing games and eating junk food.”
Dr. Naumann wasn’t surprised Yang doted on Ruby so much. Once the older blonde sister had gotten her grief out and started to get her anger under control, Yang knew she needed to look after her younger sibling. “Sounds like she’s an amazing older sister then, hmm? Have you talked to her about this? I’m sure she’d be understanding.”
That particular question was met with a vigorous head shake. “N-no! I-I can’t...Wh-what if she doesn’t accept me? What if she thinks I’m a freak and tells Dad? I-I can’t...can’t deal with that.” Ruby didn’t want to start crying, but tears were ready to spring if this went further.
Yang bonked Ruby on the head.
“Ow! What was that for?” Ruby whined while Blake was still hugging her from behind.
“I know you. You probably have similar thoughts to that version of yourself.” Yang glared in a loving way.
That didn’t sound like the Yang Xiao Long that Dr. Naumann knew well. “Ruby? Can I tell you something? It might make you feel better.” Ruby blew her nose and nodded. “Your sister knew you were coming to see me eventually and might have questions about things and she wants you to know you’re not alone in this. I would prefer for Yang to have told you this in person, but I think you’ll need this.” Dr. Naumann stood up and stretched for a moment, then moved over to a filing cabinet. She looked for Yang’s file and quickly pulled out an index card. “This is for you. Please take a moment to read it, ok?”
The younger girl wiped her tears and blew her nose again, taking the index card.
Hey Lil’ Rose. If Dr. Naumann is giving this to you, you probably feel a bit isolated and scared. I know I tell you this a lot, but I do mean it. You can talk to me about anything. You have no idea how scared I was when I came out as bi to you and Dad. But it was a relief to know you were so supportive right away. If you need someone to listen to you about that sort of thing, my door is always open. Or about anything weighing on you really. I’m your big sister and I genuinely care for your well-being. I think I’m starting to ramble now, so I’ll let Dr. Naumann take it from here.
Your big sis forever, Yang
Ruby didn’t want to start crying, but she simply couldn’t help it. However, these tears didn’t make her feel bad or stupid. They were happy tears, tears of relief. The clock ticked quietly as Ruby cried her heart out. Dr. Naumann knew she was processing everything properly now and smiled at just how far she’d come already. Eventually after what seemed like an eternity to Ruby, her tears dried up. “I...I feel so much better now...I-I’m so stupid for thinking Yang would hate me for being a girl. She would love to have a little sister….”
The older of the pair hadn’t stopped smiling as Ruby processed her thoughts. “You are valid Miss Ruby Rose. I’m not going to give you a label, since that’s something only YOU can do for yourself. I’ll give you a sheet with some things I want you to research, ok? And if you feel comfortable, tell someone about yourself, Ruby. Show them who you really are. And I’ll also write you a prescription for hormone blockers. It’ll stop puberty while we figure out who you really are.” Dr. Naumann moved over to her computer and printed out a transgender info sheet and wrote a three prescriptions. “Here we are, your sheet Miss Rose. I’ve included prescriptions for hormone blockers for six months, as well as one for anxiety and depression. I’d like to check back in on you once a month for the next six months at least, ok? Make your appointment at the desk you checked in at.”
The teenage girl was overcome with joy and eagerly nodded. “Thank you Dr. Naumann! I-I can’t wait!” She was almost bouncing off the walls now and couldn’t wait to get her medication and learn about the real her.
“Hey Ruby? Can we talk during the first break?” Bake mumbled.
“Okay.” Ruby agreed.
“One last thing before I send you on your way. From what you said on your onboarding paperwork and from speaking with your father, I know you have anxiety attacks often and can spiral down quickly. I’ll show you a few exercises to help you prevent the spiral. Now let’s start with the first, the Feather and Leaf.” Dr. Naumann was a bit more firm now, but her voice still carried all the kindness Ruby had felt from her before. “I’d like you to close your eyes Miss Rose. Now, imagine a feather or a leaf resting in your hand. Take a deep breath and let it out slowly. With each in and out, imagine lifting the object up about a foot in the air and then back down to your hand. What you’re going for is moving the object from a jagged, jerky pattern of up and down to a calm, fluid movement up and down. Let’s try it once more.”
Ruby had obediently gotten comfortable in her seat and closed her eyes. Almost instinctively, she held out her hands as she was supposed to imagine in her head. Now a leaf or a feather…. she almost immediately thought of a Sycamore leaf like the pressed one in her room that she and her mother had found when she was a kid. “O-ok I see it...now breathe in and out as calmly as possible right?”
“Correct Ruby. In and out, fluid movement of the object.” Dr. Naumann instructed calmly, making sure to not spark any anxiety.
The breathing exercise felt like it was working for Ruby. Originally when they started this exercise a minute, she could only imagine the leaf flying away from her hand or bobbing up and down rapidly since she couldn’t control her breathing. But as the seconds passed, Ruby’s breathing became more steady, less labored, calm. The red-tipped brunette had a smile form softly across her face. “I...feel better.”
“And that’s why we do that. I’ve included a few others with the transgender info sheet. If you need help with them, Yang can help. She’s done all of this as well.” Dr. Naumann stood up and smiled warmly at Ruby. “I think that about wraps today up, my dear. Would you like another hug before you go?”
There wasn’t but a moment before Ruby had hopped up from the couch and almost barreled into her doctor. “Thank you…I mean it...I’ve felt so bad for so long and I already feel better.”
Dr. Naumann returned the hug, patting Ruby gently on the head before they broke the hug. “You can fill the prescriptions at the front desk. No need to pay, it’ll get billed appropriately. Now off with you, time to start the rest of your life.”
Ruby zipped out of the room back to the front desk, handing over the three slips of paper. Within minutes, she had a bag of pills with instructions. “I guess it’s time to finally be me, huh?” She said softly to herself, wearing a smile that was truly happy for the first time in a year. She pulled out her phone to call her dad, but received a text just as she did saying he was in the first parking spot outside the door. Ruby shrugged and giggled, hopping out to the car with her dad. “Hey Dad, I’m here! Can we pick up something to eat on the way home?”
Taiyang Xiao Long, Ruby’s father, was glad to see her back. “Heya kiddo, welcome back. I suppose we can do that. Anything you’re in the mood for?”
That was a dumb question if anyone knew Ruby. “Duh, tendies Dad! Always tendies.”
Taiyang rolled his eyes. “Of course, how silly of me to ask. We’ll swing by and head home then. Text your sister and ask what she wants, we’ll be home in about forty minutes.”
Ruby whipped out her phone, doing just that and quickly getting her order. “‘Kay! She wants the usual Dad.”
The car had started moving back onto the road. “Of course, you two are creatures of habit.” He teased back, shaking his head.
Ruby stuck her tongue out playfully, writing to send off another text to Yang. She was about to take a big first step, but the index card safely snug in her medicine bag told her everything was going to be ok.
Crescent Rose 4:17PM: Hey Yang, can we talk after dinner? I wanna ask you some questions
Sunny Dragon 4:18PM: No prob lil Rose, see you in my room ten minutes after dinner then <3
Ruby loved how Yang always called her Rose. She had told Yang she didn’t like her name but didn’t mind nicknames which she’d easily accepted. She couldn’t wait for after dinner, which even to her was surprising since she was about to get her favorite takeout. A sigh escaped her mouth and she leaned back in the backseat, relaxing. Everything is going to be ok .
“Who wants to read the next chapter?” Chloe asked.
Rumi lets out a sigh and teleports behind Chloe which no one notices.
“I'll go.” Rumi answered.
Chloe almost screams.
“Where the fff(Notices Antonio), where did even come from?” Chloe asked, stepping down.
“That's a secret.” Rumi replied.
Chapter 2: The Journey of a Thousand Steps…
The ride home was more or less uneventful. Ruby did her best to deal with the bit of dysphoria she was still experiencing currently, though she kept replaying Dr. Naumann’s voice in her head saying her name over and over. She had largely tuned Tai out, thinking about how to talk to Yang about her realization and acceptance. Dr. Naumann had basically all but confirmed her sister was ok with this stuff, but the thought lingered in her head. These thoughts had distracted her so much that she was brought out of her trance by the garage door. “W-wait we’re home? I...I think I spaced out…” Ruby sighed. “I need to sleep more…”
Tai shook his head. “You’ve gotta go to bed earlier kiddo. You’re sixteen and that means teens like you need sleep, especially if you’re still growing like you are. Don’t make me set a bedtime again.” He teased, getting out of the car.
“Dad! I-I’ll be fine, I’ve just gotta stop drawing earlier...I’ll set an alarm to shower and go to bed if that makes you feel better, ok?” Ruby replied, groaning and rolling her eyes.
Tai pat whom he thought was his son on the head. “Ay, there we go. That’s my boy. Let’s go eat.”
Hearing that caused Ruby to wince noticeably to anyone who wasn’t her dad. Yang happened to have heard the car pull up and had just opened the garage door. “Yo dad! You got the food? Oh hey squirt, therapy go well? You look a bit better already.”
Tai nodded and tossed Yang’s bag at her with a bit of a chuckle. “Here ya go Miss Impatient. I got your favorite as usual.”
Yang caught it easily and victory pumped, turning around to look at her younger sibling. “Yes! Score one for my little bro asking for this.”
Ruby flinched ever so slightly at the word once again, though hopefully Yang was looking at her food and not at her. “Uh yeah therapy went well I guess. I did get to talk and vent a lot plus she gave me some antidepressants we’re trying so...yeah I guess I’d call it good.”
Yang smiled and wrapped an arm around her younger sibling. “Let’s go eat. You owe me a rematch in Mortal Kombat for that ass whooping I got Sunday night.”
“You probably deserved that ass whooping.” Ruby distracted herself from the mention of…him.
Yang gasped in mock offence.
Ruby grinned. “Oh you want to get your ass kicked? You’re fuckin’ on!”
“Language you two! Not in the house!” Tai called out from the other room. He tended to not care too much overall, but he did his best to curb it at home as much as possible.
“Sorry!” They both called out, moving into the living room to eat with their father as was tradition with takeout.
The time passed quickly and soon enough bellies were full and the evening had arrived. Yang was the first to stand up. “A’ight well I got like...ten minutes of homework left to finish, then I’ll come beat you this time, Squirt.” She winked at him, reminding him that he wanted to talk.
“Sounds good ya knucklehead!” Ruby wasn’t going to give Yang the satisfaction of the victory. “Then ten minutes it is! Console is in your room right now, yeah?”
Yang gave Ruby the classic “finger guns” before disappearing into her room and closing the door.
“Oh what I wouldn’t have given to have had a brother or sister when I was growing up. You’re lucky kiddo, you and Yang both. To have each other and you get along so well.” Tai was proud of his kids and wasn’t going to be shy about it. “What are you going to do when Yang heads out on a gap year to travel for a bit leaving just the two of us?”
Ruby shrugged. “I dunno, probably draw more? Maybe get a part-time job? Anything to not be here?” She teased, tossing her trash. “Love ya dad!”
Tai shook his head. “What am I going to do with a little gremlin like you?” He chuckled softly, a familiar reminiscent look spread across his face. “You remind me of your mom. She was a bit playful like you.”
Ruby froze for a second. “Y-yeah? Do I really act that much like mom?” The compliment meant a lot to Ruby, helping her to feel a bit better about herself. She couldn’t say she remembered too much about her mom, just the hugs and cookies really.
Ruby liked being reminded that she looked like Summer, that just means… She can pass as a girl even more.
Tai got up and hugged Ruby gently but firmly. “Yup, you’re almost identical, even look pretty similar too.” Tai sighed, lost in his memories. “If your hair was longer and your face..well a bit less acne no offense, you’d look just about what she did when she was when...” The father paused briefly, ending that thought. “Even right down to her height! And your obsession with combat boots too. I never quite understood that one, but she did look good in them.” Tai caught himself before getting too far into his past, looking down at his younger child. He knew the story always bothered Ruby, and regretted getting caught up in his emotions and longing for a present that could never be. “I’m sorry you didn’t get to spend that much time with her kiddo...I know it’s pretty hard. Did I ever tell you what your mother wanted to name you if you’d been born a girl?”
Ruby nodded, burying her face into her father for a moment. “Yeah, you told me several times. Ruby Summer Rose. You said mom wanted a little bit of her to stay with me forever so that’s why her name was the middle name.” Ruby started to trail off quietly now. “I kinda wish it was my name so I’d have that…” Ruby could feel her pulse rising. “B-but that’s ok!” She instantly knew didn’t want to be here anymore. Her body’s temperature was rising and she felt a familiar tickle in her throat that only happened before she cried. She couldn’t cry in front of her dad. It wasn’t a manly thing to do and as far as he was concerned, he still had a son. Her mind had taken off on its own just as she said that stupid line and her dysphoria was about to flare up. “I-I gotta go to the bathroom, sorry dad!” She said breaking herself from the hug and dashing off to her room. She quickly made it into the bathroom she and Yang shared that joined their rooms.
Ruby felt her chest tightening, her breathing becoming shorter and more erratic. The panic, her fears were about to blanket her, but Ruby remembered what she’d been taught a few hours ago. Hands out, leaf in palm. The leaf goes up and down with each breath in and out. Slower. Calmer, deeper breaths. The leaf went up and Ruby breathed in, remaining relatively steady. The leaf descended as Ruby breathed out, gently falling without apparent air resistance. The image of being able to control something like that so well helped Ruby to focus on what she could control, not what she couldn’t. “W-wow….I knew that wasn’t quite a bad panic attack but that worked really well…” She said softly, “I’ll have to thank Dr. Naumann for that…” She jumped slightly, hearing Yang knock on the door.
“Yo Squirt, game time let’s go!” She called out, opening her door. “But first,” she started softly. “We need to talk about you right?”
Ruby bounced in, almost ready to tell Yang. “Y-yeah let’s talk. Dr. Naumann was great. She helped me figure out how to manage my panic attacks and gave me some exercises to help ground myself and stuff like that.”
Yang hugged Ruby tightly. “Well good to hear! I’ve got something first real quick if you don’t mind. I’ve got some news about Blake.” Yang smiled as she plopped down on one of the two beanbags in her room.
Ruby followed shortly after, falling onto the other one. “Oh did you knock her up already Yang? Goodness that was quick, and still in high school too!” She saw the opportunity and took it, receiving a pillow to the face gently as a response.
“We're gonna be careful.” Yang replied.
Purr…
“Looks like Blake's content.” Ruby pointed out while Blake was still cuddling her.
Does that mean the ears are real?
Zoey thought in amazement.
Yang couldn’t help but laugh. “Ok now, you know that can’t happen. But for real, serious talk for a moment. Blake doesn’t want this to leave your lips but she wanted me to tell you this. She came out to me as non-binary before I dropped her off at home.”
Ruby’s heart jumped. What did that mean? Was Blake like her? She needed answers, but now she couldn’t just talk to Yang about them. “Y-yeah? What does that mean exactly?”
Yang smiled. “I figured you’d ask, oh little innocent Rose. Non-binary means she doesn’t quite identify as a girl. And not a boy either. She’s just her, somewhere in the middle. Though she still calls herself a girl sometimes.” Yang shrugged. “She’s still figuring out pronouns and stuff, but for now she/they are fine. And before you ask, that means pronouns like she, her, they, them. I’ll explain it later.”
Ruby had so many questions, so many thoughts and worries. The only thing she could focus on was how she now wanted nothing more than to leave the room and cry. Conveniently as if ordained by the gods that be, her phone buzzed with a message from Jaune needing help with the compsci homework. “Sorry Yang, gotta go tutor Jaune again! Tell Blake I said congrats if I don’t see her first! Sorry about the game, I’ll kick your butt next time!!” And with that, she dashed through the bathroom, closing the doors behind her. She wanted to finish this thing with Jaune so she could text Blake and get some answers hopefully.
“Yo Squirt, didn’t you wanna talk?” Yang called out, but it fell on deaf ears. She raised an eyebrow a tad confused and shrugged it off. Usually Ruby wasn’t in that big of a rush to help Jaune with homework or anything besides ranked games. And to pass up a 1v1 Mortal Kombat slugfest? It felt odd to her. She played it off as Ruby still being a bit over the edge after therapy, but she’d have to ask about it later. She remembered her first few sessions and she’d been antsy, angry, and emotional after them as well. “Boys will be boys…I guess.”
Meanwhile back in Ruby’s room, the tutor of the pair picked up her headset, taking a brief moment to breathe and clear her head, hopping in the tutoring channel of their discord server they had with all their friends. Ruby did CompSci, Blake did Literature, Pyrrha did History, Nora was surprisingly talented in Chemistry and Physics. Ren handled Social Sciences and assisted Blake. Jaune...thankfully he was great in math. Yang perhaps surprisingly to some didn’t need much tutoring but did well enough in school to not need much help. That’s not to say she didn’t ask for it, but she was well-rounded enough. Jaune popped in a moment later.
“Oh hey Ruby…” Jaune mentally kicked himself for that. He had a habit of calling people by their screen name. They’d been raiding a lot in their favorite MMO and didn’t refer to each other by name for politeness and anonymity in game. “Ah shit sorry I keep doing that. My bad.”
Ruby’s heart fluttered after hearing a friend call her that, even if it was without Jaune knowing. “N-nah it’s fine, we’ve got a raid in an hour anyway, keep it up or you’ll slip during the raid, Arctus .” She couldn’t help but giggle a bit at his name.
“Yeah yeah laugh it up at my expense. Look, I thought it was clever at the time since I’m a tank and a bear.” Jaune retorted. “Anyway, the homework? I’m not quite sure I understand recursion….”
“Alright ya dunce let’s get to it, it’s not that hard…” Ruby began to go over some basics leading up to the concept, sharing her console window.
Jaune slowly started to get it and it clicked after a good forty five minutes. “Ok I think I get it. So kinda like if I opened a door and walked into another room, then opened that door and walked in, only to find myself in the same room?”
“Kinda more or less. You’ll create your function and normally we’d define it externally, but instead we do it inside. Kinda useful sometimes.” Ruby replied, closing out the console window. “Alright, raid is in fifteen minutes, water and bathroom break. See over in the guild channel!” Jaune agreed and they disconnected.
Ruby took a deep breath and grabbed her phone as she moved towards her bathroom. She opened up her private chat with Blake and began typing.
“Looks like you're gonna talk with your friend here, but I wonder what.” H!Scootaloo said, comfortable in her wheelchair.
“I don't understand why we have to watch a bunch of strangers.” Diamond Tiara scoffed.
Crescent Rose 7:46PM: hey Blake? Yang told me you came out as non-binary earlier today! Congratz!
Black Cat 7:47PM: Oh hey, thanks! It...took some courage to do it but I’m glad she was quite accepting of it.
Black Cat 7:47PM: I’m going to guess you have questions, don’t you?
“Blakey knows me so well.” Ruby smiled.
“Of course I do, you’re like a sister to me.” Blake mumbled.
“D-do you—” Ruby gets cut off.
“Yes, I mean that.” Blake replied bluntly.
Ruby was effectively a glass house of emotions to Blake. She could hide them from Yang, but Blake always knew something was up.
I wish you didn't have to…
Yang thought in sadness.
Crescent Rose 7:48PM: am i that obvious?
Black Cat 7:48PM: Yes, very.
Crescent Rose 7:49PM: i...can i just say it?
Black Cat 7:50PM: Do what you’re comfortable with, no rush. I have a feeling I’ve got the answers you seek.
Crescent Rose 7:52PM: k i’m just going to say it thn
Crescent Rose 7:52PM: Blakeithinkimightbeagirl
Ruby was mortified, what if being transgender was too different than non-binary? What if Blake told Yang and Yang told Dad? And what if he didn’t like that?! Ruby started to panic but Blake responded in time.
Black Cat 7:53PM: What’re your name and pronouns?
“Well, there's one supportive friend which makes it 20% cooler.” Rainbow Smiled.
Would the family accept if they knew?
Isa, Mirabel and Camilo thought.
Ruby’s panic stopped pretty quickly, as if hitting a brick wall. Blake wasn’t going to judge? She didn’t think she was a freak? With a moment of hesitation, a deep breath, and the confidence that Blake was a good friend, Ruby answered.
Crescent Rose 7:55PM: ive been going by Ruby today...it’s my screen name in a game i play w/ Jaune and he accidentally called me that when I was tutoring him a few minutes ago and Blake i felt so happy! like i don’t think ive felt that kinda happy in awhile.
Black Cat 7:56PM: I’m glad you’ve found yourself Ruby. I don’t want to assume, but I’ll take a stab in the dark and guess she/her pronouns?
Crescent Rose 7:57PM: *facepalms* y-yeah sry about that i got caught up in the moment...i didn’t really figure this out until earlier today. those kinda feel right
Blake couldn’t help but giggle at Ruby’s innocence and joy. She’d just figured out who she was mere hours and was already sharing. Ruby had always been a bit too trusting at times, but here Blake felt it was a good thing. The faunus remembered all the other times Ruby had asked for advice.
Ruby meanwhile wanted to keep talking to Blake but the raid was about to start. Since she was one of the raid leaders, she had to show up. Sometimes though, fate has other plans. Ruby was about to click on the Guild server when Jaune’s chat popped up.
Arctus 7:58PM: Uh so no raid apparently. The game servers just went down. Power outage at the main hub. ETA to bring them back up is like three hours. Pasha called off the raid and told us to chill for the night
That couldn’t have been better for Ruby, she’d have to thank Pasha, the guild leader, for not moving over to a different game for the night. She’d get to keep talking to Blake.
Crescent Rose 8:00PM: thanks for the heads up, kinda good timing cuz i got wrapped up in a sketch idea i just had to get down and got distracted so ima go do that, see ya tomorrow at lunch?
Arctus 8:01PM: :thumbsup: see ya
And with that brief encounter over, she could return back to Blake whose message she hadn’t read yet.
Black Cat 7:58PM: So can I ask how you pieced some of this together? If you don’t mind me teasing a bit, I’m going to guess you stole one of Yang’s skirts didn’t you? :P
Ruby read the message and felt called out as her face went as red as her hair tips, but forgot Blake was teasing (hard to do since Blake only used emotes when being especially playful). Did that mean Yang knew before she did? Had Blake guessed that since Yang had told her? No, Yang wouldn’t do that to her. Yang was too good of a big sister. She had to stop assuming the worst immediately.
“でもそれが私の得意なことなんです…(But that's what I'm good at…)” Ruby said.
Crescent Rose 8:02PM: ...Yang didn’t tell you about that did she?
Black Cat 8:02PM: Nah, I’ve just read other transgirls figuring it out and borrowing clothes was a pretty common thread amongst them. I’ve got some clothes from late middle school I was going to donate that will probably fit you, do you want them Ruby?
Crescent Rose 8:02PM: CAN I PLEASE?
Crescent Rose 8:02PM: wait how am i gonna get them? you don’t drive and i can’t yet either
Blake had an answer for that, Ruby assumed. Blake usually had an answer for most things. She really loved hanging out with Blake, even if she was her older sister’s girlfriend.
Black Cat 8:03PM: Oh small flower of little faith, of course I have a plan.
Black Cat 8:04PM: We’ve got book club on Wednesday right? And Yang usually takes us home and goes for her run after?
Crescent Rose 8:04PM: yeah but how’s that gonna get girl clothes into my room secretly
Crescent Rose 8:04PM: either Yang or dad’ll see em and then ill get found out
Black Cat 8:07PM: I was getting there little Rose. My mom has some art books I think you’ll like. So we ask Yang to swing by my place and I’ll grab them. And by them, I mean the clothes. We’ll get back to your place since Yang and I hang out all night while your dad is at his club. We’ll have about an hour to get you dressed up and pretty.
Crescent Rose 8:08PM: that sounds fun! But then ill have to take the clothes off after just a few…
Black Cat 8:09PM: If you think you’re ready, you could just come out to Yang. She accepted me, she’ll accept you. I bet you got cold feet about telling her earlier didn’t you?
Crescent Rose 8:12PM: ...you read me like an open book Belladonna! but i did….i ran out of the room. Jaune did need tutoring but if i’m honest it was just perfect timing cuz i was looking for an excuse to leave anyway...didnt even do the rematch.
Black Cat 8:14PM: You don’t have to do this unless you’re ready to ok? Don’t push yourself, but I know your older sister well enough that I know she’d be happy to have a little sister.
Crescent Rose 8:15PM: i wanna do it Blake, i wanna do it so bad, and Yang deserves to know, i just wanna be me first
Crescent Rose 8:16PM: though one small favor if i can ask?
Black Cat 8:16PM: Shoot for the stars Ruby Rose. The mic is yours.
Crescent Rose 8:17PM: can u do my makeup too?
Black Cat 8:18PM: Way ahead of you Ruby, already got a makeup kit on order for you. It’ll be here tomorrow and I’ll bring it Wednesday
Crescent Rose 8:20PM: BLAKE U DON’T HAVE TO BUY ME THINGS
Black Cat 8:21PM: It’s not a problem Ruby. You’ll be like the little sister I never had. Plus I’m well off AND someone should get a proper gift for her birthday since she just discovered herself today. I got old you a present, not Ruby.
Crescent Rose 8:22PM: i don’t deserve you Blake
Crescent Rose 8:22PM: how’d i end up with 2 amazin older sisters
Ruby smiled at that, then felt a guilty sharp prick at her heart, remembering what happened in the Ever After.
Black Cat 8:23PM: No need to thank me except by letting me doll you up. Your sister refuses to and it’s fun. I haven’t gotten to since Ilia was still in town.
Crescent Rose 8:24PM: well now u have me! i’ll let you doll me up whenever!
Black Cat 8:25PM: I’m looking forward to this Ruby. I’ve gotta go, Yang said she wanted to video chat. I’ll see you tomorrow ok? Oh and congrats to you as well for figuring yourself out.
Crescent Rose 8:26PM: i am too! i’ll see u tmrmw, just try not to say my old name much, it kinda bothers me cuz i never rlly liked it
Black Cat 8:27PM: That’s not an issue, most trans people don’t like their deadname. Have a good evening my new little sister.
Crescent Rose 8:28PM: see ya other big sis! <3
Ruby felt Blake smiled into her neck.
Ruby felt relieved, relaxed even, for the first time all year. It felt so nice to know she wasn’t crazy, that she wasn’t alone in this. Blake was right there! She wasn’t transgender but Ruby figured that she’d have way more answers than Ruby would find on her own. “I already feel so much better about myself…” A yawn escaped her mouth as she stood up to stretch. “Am I already tired? I should shower before I fall asleep at my desk again. Dad wasn't happy about that last time.” Ruby stripped her clothes off, tossing them in the hamper next to the bathroom and entered the bathroom. Starting the shower, she cracked open Yang’s door just a crack. “Hey Yang, I’m gonna shower. That ok?”
Yang waved her hand as if Ruby could see. “Yep, don’t use all the hot water. I’m crashing soon and need to as well. Gotta get up for breakfast with Blakey here~”
The younger sister rolled her eyes. “Yeah yeah, whatever you say big sis. Say hi to Blakey for me.”
Their conversation ended there. Ruby got in the shower, careful to shave her face quickly and address that before dysphoria got to her and ruined her relatively good mood. She couldn’t believe Blake was actually giving her stuff! A small squee escaped from her mouth after rinsing her face off. “Oh wait shit, I should have asked Blake to…” Ruby’s mumble got even quieter. “...get me some panties...it’s gonna feel really weird wearing my boxers and a dress or something…” Ruby mumbled to herself, obviously bringing her mood down. In a rare act of self-care, she gently smacked her own cheeks. “No, we're not doing this tonight. I feel good for once and I’m not gonna go down like that. I’ll figure the panties situation out later.” Her own little pep talk seemed to have worked, as the rest of the shower, she was able to hum softly to herself and keep her mood up. She hopped out after about ten minutes and dried off, grabbing an old t-shirt her dad gave her years ago to sleep in as well as a pair of underwear. The girl in her didn’t like the last part, but was too tired to let the dysphoria win. Her phone buzzed with a message from Blake.
Black Cat 9:03PM: Oh I figured you might not want to wear your current underwear, so I’ve got some panties other transgirls recommended. What size do you wear?
Ruby was so happy she could cry right now, but her body was too tired to let her. She was going to give Blake the biggest hug Wednesday afternoon. Blake really deserved it.
Crescent Rose 9:04PM: ima small...cuz im small y’know?
Black Cat 9:05PM: Don’t make me roll my eyes at you missy. Those are ordered and will be here tomorrow too. I’ll see you tomorrow for sure.
Ruby yawned and smiled at that. Blake was way too thoughtful. Here she was, just her girlfriend’s now younger sister, and she was spoiling the hell out of her. “I wonder if I’ll ever find a girl like Blake, caring and kind and pretty and thoughtful. Or a boy maybe…” Ruby felt an uncomfortable shiver go up her spine with that last sentence. “Ok...just a girl…” She’d never really had interest in boys anyway. Another yawn escaped her mouth and she reached over for her phone charger and plugged it in, climbing into bed. Her phone was picked up gently to turn off her lights and reply to Blake, but she fell asleep before she could. Her first night as herself.
“Yeah me too, I don't wanna label myself but I would also date the person if I had a close bond with them.” Ruby said.
“Are you Demisexual by any chance or still unlabeled by that as well?” Max shyly asked.
“I don't really know, I just wanna be me so… no labeling.” Ruby smiled.
(It's time for your first break.)
Blake smirked and picked up Ruby bridal style.
“Blake!” Ruby’s face was beet red.
“You have Yang, why are you teasing me like this?” Ruby asked.
“Because it's fun and I have a cute little sister.” Blake answered.