Chapter Text
“Where were you?” Andrew asks the moment Aaron gets into the dorm. Her eyes narrow suspiciously as Aaron adjusts her cardigan, hugging it more firmly around herself.
“The library. I told you this morning I was going after class, and when you text me.”
“You were very delayed in replying to my text.”
“Yes,” Aaron says slowly, staring purposefully at Andrew. “I was studying.”
“Yet if that cheerleader texts you, you’re always quick enough to answer.” Andrew does not like Aaron’s association with this girl. She thinks she is safe from Aaron trying to pursue cheerleading at this stage, heaven forbid, but it’s a union she finds questionable. Aaron’s old quote unquote friends - for Andrew would not really label them as such - at least were easy to read. They held no feeling for her. Let her tag along only when convenient. Found it easy to break connection with the gentlest nudge from Andrew. No. Not really friends at all.
This girl, however, not only endures Aaron, but seeks her out. She’s even smiled bracingly through Andrew’s curt efforts to scare her off. The hope had been that the summer break would drive distance between them, that she would move past whatever fascination she has with Aaron come the start of their second year, but no. Before classes even started again she had come in search of Aaron. Andrew doesn’t get what’s in this for her. Aaron is not the kind of person to be taken in by popular girls, and the shiny smiley cheerleader is certainly popular. Honestly, Aaron’s not really someone people take to at all, not with any real attachment. This is why she’s safer with Andrew. Andrew can endure her sour moods and sharp attitude. She and Andrew are bound by blood, and though the concept of family means nothing to Andrew, she cannot detach herself from the concept of Aaron as her kin. Twins. That goes beyond family. Nicky has earned her loyalty through the sacrifices she has made for them. Aaron had to earn nothing, the sheer fact of their birth intrinsically tying her to Andrew forever. Whether they like it or not.
Andrew would like it more if Aaron could just be satisfied with her. If she were not always seeking more. Andrew feels no need to run around in search of other companionship, so she does not understand why Aaron does. Just another baffling difference between them. Now that Aaron can no longer fill the void inside herself with substances, perhaps she means to do so with people. It will not work. Aaron will learn what Andrew already has at some point. That aching hollow pit inside of them is permanent and unfillable. It will only swallow any offering and feel more empty for it.
Aaron doesn’t answer Andrew’s jibe. She huffs and storms over to her bed, throwing her backpack on the floor and flopping facedown onto the blanket. A pretense of privacy. As if blocking her view of Andrew really separates them.
“Don’t sulk.” Andrew moves to the window, cracking it open.
“Stinks in here,” Aaron complains. She’s given up on trying to get Andrew to stop smoking in their room. She will not win that battle, though she will complain about it. Andrew ignores her. She watches Aaron turn her head towards the wall. Slip her phone from her pocket. Read the screen, then type a reply. Her face is not visible, but Andrew would bet she is smiling. She wonders what the fuck she and the cheerleader have to talk about. How they could have anything in common. Perhaps Aaron builds a version of herself out of lies to impress. She’s certainly started dressing differently. Started to buy the kind of clothes she never would have worn before over the last year; cardigans and sweaters and even a dress, though Andrew hasn’t seen her in that once. In high school, Aaron hid in sweats, hoodies, baggy jeans, big t-shirts. She still wears these around the dorm, but dresses nicer for class. Andrew does not know who she is trying to fool or impress. She’s even woken up early a few mornings to do her makeup. Doubtless this is the influence of the cheerleader.
Not that Andrew is opposed to a bit of eyeliner, but Aaron’s started wearing blush and powder and pastel colour eyeshadows. Andrew wonders if she is trying to make herself look different. Trying to separate them. She’s grown her hair down from the choppy, short, at home cut they’d been sporting for the last year of high school, the ends curling against her neck now. So Andrew has done the same, though the sensation of the hair brushing her skin annoys her so much she ends up clipping hers back most of the time. Aaron can try and put distance between them in so many ways, but Andrew will not let her forget they are mirror images.
She inhales deeply, feeling the heat slip down into her lungs. Andrew holds her breath until her chest aches, then breathes it out. Cheerleader practice was this afternoon. Which means she couldn’t have been at the library with Aaron. It is not unheard of for Aaron to disappear alone. Especially to the library, the one place Andrew will not follow her, but Andrew has a feeling she's hiding something. Call it twin intuition. Twintuition. Andrew huffs to herself. She hopes Aaron isn’t infatuated with another boy. She hasn’t seen her hanging around anyone, but she did go to a few parties with the cheerleader last year. She would have been exposed not only to boys, but athletes. Even worse. Andrew will be displeased if she’s broken their deal over some airhead football player.
She flicks the butt of her cigarette out the window. She looks over at Aaron. Her back is still turned, her body curled in around her phone now, typing away. Yes, Andrew definitely thinks something is going on. She’ll have to keep a closer eye on her.