Chapter Text
Gustave finds the journal in a little hut in the Ancient Sanctuary. It's old and battered, made of well-worn leather with an image of a gestral mask stamped into the front. Not one of the fancy chroma journals the Expeditions leave behind, but a plain paper journal, like his own. It’s a sketchbook too. Drawings of beautiful landscapes, gestrals, even some Expeditioners. He flips through the pages, and finds the first diary entry.
Remember this - your name is Verso. You are at least 50 years old. To get your age, subtract the number on the monolith from 100 and add 33. You don’t look old. You’re immortal. You are not real. You have never been real.
Your mother is Aline Dessendre. She is the Paintress. She made you to replace her real son. This is important- you are not real. Your sister is Alicia. Your father is Renoir. You had another sister, but she’s missing. Her name is Clea. None of you are real.
Your mother is trapped at the top of the Monolith by her husband, the real Renoir. Every year she gets weaker and he erases more people. The people of this canvas call it the Gommage. You will not Gommage.
Your friends are Monoco, Noco, and Esquie. Noco is a Searcher. Monoco is his patate. Esquie is a giant being who can fly. They and the rest of this world were created by the real Verso. Remember this. They love you because you look like him, but you are not him. You cannot be him.
Your mother is dying because she’s been here too long. The only way to save your mother is to make her leave the canvas. The only way to do that is to kill her. You need to work with an Expedition to get through the barrier and kill her.
You won’t remember any of this. Keep this journal close, and read it when you forget again. Every time you die you’ll forget more.
There are drawings after that, all of them labeled. A giant being with a joyful, friendly face labeled Esquie. Two gestrals, one tall, one small, labeled Noco and Monoco. He frowns, remembering the little Noco they met in Flying Waters. His mask shape and brush look somewhat like the taller gestral. Family resemblance, maybe? How do gestrals breed? He decides to think about that later.
The words in the journal though. Those are interesting. He shows it to Lune, who also doesn’t know what to make of it.
“So this Verso, he’s writing this down so he doesn’t forget. When he dies. Because he’s immortal?” She scowls at the page. “This… it could be a trick. Something to throw us off the trail. We don’t even know if this Verso is real.” She doesn't think it's worth investigating so Gustave stows the journal, but he can’t stop thinking about it.
When they reach the Gestral Village, he listens. And in the market, he hears a merchant mention a Verso.
“Verso?” He asks the being. “Do you know where he is? I found a journal of his, and I’d like to meet him.”
The merchant trades a look with the one next to him. <Verso hasn’t been here in… ten Expeditions>, that one says.
The original merchant nods. <He used to come here all the time. The patates miss him.>
Ten Expeditions. Ten years since they’ve seen Verso. Maybe he wasn’t as immortal as his notebook claims. Gustave puts it from his mind as best he can. He’s happily distracted by the arrival of Sciel, and their journey to find Esquie.
Esquie, too, mentions a Verso. “My best friend, Verso,” he says. Then stops, making a sad sound. “Verso doesn’t remember being Verso anymore.”
“Why doesn’t Verso remember being Verso?” Sciel asks, and Esquie makes another sad hum.
“Verso’s Maman made a mistake. It makes him forget. And forgetting makes him sad. I don’t like it when Verso is sad.”
“Could you take us to him?” Gustave asks, only for Lune to give him a Look. He’s getting them off track. Verso may have had important information at one time, but if he has some form of amnesia, he might not have that information any more.
“No,” Esquie says sadly. “I don’t know where he is.”
“We keep going,” Lune decides. “We don't have time to go chasing after someone else. We need to get to Stone Wave Cliffs to find Florrie. Then we can cross the ocean to the Paintress. Anything else will have to wait.”
Gustave agrees. The mission is more important. Even if he does spend his nights in camp scouring the notebook for any more information. Most of it is filled with drawings, and little notes like remember to avoid the path behind Stone Wave Cliffs, there’s a Bourgeon there or tell the next Expedition to watch out for the crushing cavern, with a map pointing to a particular place. He has drawings of nevrons too, many with useful information like weak points and strength.
Some drawings are faces of people he knew and clearly cared about. Careful drawings of people. Expeditioners. Some faces drawn multiple times, multiple expressions. He stares for a long time at a picture of a young woman with long hair and a mask covering half of her face. There's a mournful look in her single eye, and the artist clearly spent a significant amount of time capturing every detail.
“Oh,” Esquie says, lumbering over to look at the notebook in Gustave’s hands. “You found Verso’s journal.”
“Who are all these people?” Gustave asks, and Esquie hums softly.
“They are people Verso loves. People he doesn’t want to forget.” Then he adds, slowly, in almost a whisper, “It hurts him to remember he forgot.”
“Can we help him?” Gustave knows they need to prioritize the mission. He knows defeating the Paintress comes first. But he still feels the need to help.
Esquie is silent for a long time. “I don’t know,” he says at last.