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William entered the lecture hall looking half-dead, his glasses askew, strands of hair sticking out despite his best efforts to tame them. He looked like he had just fought a valiant battle with his bedside alarm and lost it brutally as he had to physically drag his body all the way from the dorms against his own will. He made a beeline to the last row, dropped his bag on the desk, slumped against Tui who was already seated there. He let out a groan dramatically before saying, “Remind me why do we even need to study this course? If I had the specific level of madness needed to memorize complicated insect scientific names I wouldn't have chosen bioinformatics as my major.”
Tui’s arm wrapped around William’s shoulder as he patted him sympathetically, “Tell me about it,” as he sighed.
Nut, looking too pristine and perfect for a 7 am lecture, looked at them both from the other end of their shared desk, amused, as he said, “Guys, it is mandatory. You want your degree? You gotta pass this course.”
William shot him a dirty look. “Easy for you to say, Mr. 9.8 GPA.”
“At least one of us needs to lock in if we all want to pass,” Nut pointed out calmly, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
“Codes are so much more fun than whatever this shit is, bro,” Tui sounded borderline depressed.
William screeched, “I KNOW RIGHT?! And whoever decided this course should be a part of the syllabus needs to be sued! Fundamentals beat my ass last semester and who decided I am ready for Applied Entomology? Why the hell is this even a subject we need to study?!”
Tui shuddered, his brain supplying a montage of himself crying over his observation notebook at a random 3 AM. “Don't fucking remind me. I barely passed thanks to Nut's notes.”
“If you need my notes then both of you should shut up and let me at least focus on taking them. The Professor hates when people talk and last week we almost got thrown out of the class because of you two,” Nut hissed, sending them both a warning glare.
“Why are all these Ento teachers such psychos, bro,” Tui said. “Their entire department walks around like they have a permanent stick up their asses.”
“Exactly! They're all too snobby for what? Not to mention most of them are old, wrinkled and grumpy all the time,” William chimed in.
Nut muttered, “Idiots,” under his breath.
“WE HEARD THAT!” Tui and William screamed in perfect unison.
Nut hit them both on their heads with his notebook rolled into a makeshift weapon, while William kicked his leg under the table in retaliation. Tui threatened to stab Nut with his pen.
In the mini commotion, they didn't notice the person who had entered the hall and walked to the podium and the mic setup. A sharp, cool, and unexpectedly younger voice startled the three out of their brawl as they scrambled to sit straight and face the front of the hall.
The sight that greeted William knocked the air out of his lungs. Instead of their annoying professor, a young man, probably a couple years older than William, stood on the dais, looking at the class with a gentle smile and a confident posture.
He is beautiful. God.
“Good morning everyone. I am Supha Sangaworawong. A second year Master's student specializing in Insect Toxicology under Dr. Sataporn. He asked me to handle this lecture because today's topic is related to my area of specialization.”
“He’s so pretty…” William whispered.
Tui choked on air.
Nut muttered, “Oh, no…”, noticing the dumbstruck expression on his friend's face.
“Supha Sangaworawong,” William said reverently, ignoring them both.
Nut gave William a sideways look. “Barely five minutes ago you said you couldn't memorize a scientific name but you memorized this guy's name instantly?”
William replied, “This is the name of my future husband. Different priorities, different brain cells,” without taking his eyes off the said future husband for even a second.
Tui dove under the desk, shoulders shaking violently with suppressed laughter.
Nut’s jaw dropped, looking at William like he had grown a second head. “Liam. This is a new record, even for you. I'm scared.”
William didn't seem to pay them any attention, all his senses attuned to the movement in the front of the class as the man of dreams kept talking.
Tui resurfaced, trying not to start another fit of giggles, as he said, “Nut, leave him be. This is so much more entertaining than the lecture.”
Nut groaned, turning his attention back to the front. “God give me strength to tolerate his clownery.”
For the second half of the lecture, the class had to move to the lab for the practical experiment. The moment everyone started getting out of their seats, William grabbed his own things at lightning speed, and started sprinting towards the exit like a man possessed, knocking over a few of his classmates in the process. Mid-run, he turned to scream, “Gotta go! See you two losers at the lab!” at Nut and Tui who remained frozen at the desk.
Once inside the lab, their class of 20 had gathered around a long rectangular table which had been converted into a temporary work station. Rows of glassware, micropipettes and suspiciously pungent analytical grade chemical solutions were arranged neatly on the table.
Nut and Tui were the last ones to enter, and they hovered near the door, unsure where to go as the table was almost completely surrounded. At the centre of the table, stood Supha, who seemed to notice them both and called out to the rest of the class, “Guys, can you make some space for your two friends? I need everyone to look at what I am demonstrating without any obstruction.”
“He's nice,” Tui muttered.
“Yeah. Professor Sataporn would've yelled at us for being the last ones,” Nut agreed.
As they both settled, Nut took a proper look and froze in fear. At the centre of the table, sat a huge clear plastic container full of larvae.
Alive. Moving.
Horrified, Nut clutched Tui’s arm and whisper-screamed, “Chayatorn. Brother. Save me. I think I am going to throw up.”
Tui wasn't faring any better. “Dude. I want to run away too. Where the fuck is William?”
As they searched around the table, their gazes finally landed on William almost at the same time. He was standing right next to Supha, who had picked up the box of insects in the meantime and started explaining the details of the experiment. William seemed laser-focused, all his attention on the man who was talking, as if everything else around him had dissolved into a mist of nothingness.
“Why isn't he freaking out? It's..They’re so close to him! What the hell?” Tui’s eyes widened in shock. “The other day he got scared of a cockroach and begged me to chase it out of the dorm room, but now he stands near squirming worms and he's even got a smile on his face?!” he said.
“Beats me. I have never seen him acting this way over a crush, like ever,” Nut said, full of disbelief and awe.
“As I had explained earlier, we need to make serial dilution of the insecticide first. The stock solution here has the concentration of 1000 ppm. Using the method from earlier, what would be the volume needed to make a 20 ppm solution if the desired final volume is 10 ml?”
Before anyone could even start thinking, William piped up, “200 microliters of stock made up to 10 ml with distilled water.”
Nut and Tui gasped.
The entire room went silent.
Someone said, “What the fuck,” under their breath.
Unaware of everything, Supha smiled at William, and said, “Smart,” as he went back to explaining.
William’s face split into a proud grin, as his eyes found Nut and Tui for the first time in forever as he mouthed ‘He called me smart,’ and without waiting for a reaction, he went back to staring at the man next to him, with a dreamy look.
Nut snorted, “The audacity of this bitch.”
“Who is this person and what has he done to our William,” Tui responded, perplexed.
Meanwhile, the experiment had moved on to the next part. “Can someone pass me the pipette?” Supha asked without looking up, as he was busy with setting up something.
William beat everyone to it as he picked the pipette up and offered it to the man, like he was holding something precious.
“Thank you, Nong…”
“William. Williamjakrapatrkaewpanpong.”
“Oh. Uh. Thanks, Nong William.”
“You're welcome, Mr. Supha..”
“Est.”
“What?”
“My name. You can just call me P’Est. I'm like, barely four years older than you, I assume? You calling me Mr. Supha makes it sound like I'm a 40 year old uncle,” Est chuckled, his heart shaped lips parting slightly.
William forgot how to breathe for the second time that morning.
“You don't understand, Lego. You should see him first! He's like an angel. Also, he smells so good! Like sea-salt, sunshine and fresh air. How is he even real?” William was waxing poetic about Est over his untouched plate of lunch at the cafeteria. Nut and Tui were holding onto each other for dear life, having witnessed the horror show personally with front-row tickets.
Lego hummed absently as he chewed on a French fry, “Interesting.”
“I have decided. I am going to marry him, we will live in a spacious house, with a big yard, and a puppy brother for Chowon. No, a puppy brother and a cat sister. Wait, I don't know if he has allergies. Anyway, I'll let him decide. I have even come up with a name for our future child-”
Lego held up his palm, prompting William to pause his rant. “Will. Hold up. Do you even know if he likes men?”
William’s brain short-circuited as realisation dawned. “Don't tell me…” he deflated like a balloon, colour draining out of his face instantly.
“Your man is as straight as a strand of cooked noodle.”
Everyone at the table snapped their heads so fast towards the voice. Hong stood near their table, smug, trying to look nonchalant but Nut noticed the slightest hint of curve to his lips, meaning he was forcing himself not to burst out laughing.
“BABY!!!!!” Nut wailed loudly. “Save me from this creature. He's been acting so weird the whole morning, I thought he fell somewhere and hit his head hard,” he wrapped his arms around Hong's waist as he shifted closer. Hong gave him a pat on his head and he peeled Nut’s hands away, only to settle near him and pull him into a proper hug.
Tui rolled his eyes, “Why is everyone hell bent on testing me today?”
William, who remained stunned the whole time, suddenly came back to life and started hounding Hong with questions. “Wait. Hong. You said he's not straight. How do you know that? Who told you? Do you know Est? Tell me everything! HONG!”
Lego looked at Tui and Nut apologetically, “I'm sorry guys. I didn't realise you had to go through this the whole morning.”
William paid him no mind, as he continued whining, “Hoooooooong!”
Hong broke his embrace, ignoring Nut’s protest, until he shifted them both and settled Nut against his side. Nut's arm wrapped around Hong’s waist protectively as he slumped on his shoulder, with a content smile. Hong’s hand found the hem of Nut’s hoodie and started playing with it, as he finally turned to face William and said calmly, “P’Perth.”
The entire table went “Ohhhhhh,” as the collective realisation hit them all at once.
Perth was a senior who used to play bass with them before he became busy with his Master's. He was in the same department as Est.
“Why didn't I think of this first?” William mentally cursed himself. “And how did you know about my crush?”
“If you weren't distracted the whole time, you would've noticed that Tui and Nut were live tweeting the whole drama. So naturally I got nosy and decided to do some investigation on my own. Turns out, P’Perth is labmates with your P’Est, dumbass. He was so eager to spill, and now I have your man's entire history. I can even do a natal chart reading for your love life compatibility, but it's going to cost you some money,” Hong smirked.
“HONG, HAVE I EVER TOLD YOU HOW MUCH I LOVE YOU-” William leapt halfway across the table only to be threatened back to his own chair by a furious Nut who pointed a knife at him. “Sit the fuck down, Jakrapatr. My man is off limits. Go hug your own man.” Nut wrapped both his arms possessively around Hong who secretly seemed to enjoy the attention.
“Dog,” William made a face at Nut.
Tui dissolved into laughter as Lego sent a loud prayer to the Heavens.
The next time William met Est was pure coincidence. He was navigating the secluded, dusty corner of the library that he was 99% sure was the rendezvous point of the university ghosts after midnight, or worse, horny campus couples who wanted to make out. He was terrified of encountering either option, so he tried to find the books he needed and get out of there as soon as possible. But as the clock ticked, the maze of the tall book shelves seemed to get even more complicated and he was nowhere near finishing his task. Sighing, he decided he needed to bring either Nut or Tui. As he left the aisle in a hurry, his shoulder bumped into someone else and knocked over the books they were holding. Panicking, his hands shot out so quickly and caught the person right as they were about to hit the ground.
“Oh my God I am so sorry, I was distracted, I didn't see you…P’Est?”
He was met with the angelic sight of Est’s flustered face, who was clinging onto William's biceps as he tried to regain his balance. William's brain started going haywire, the feeling of Est’s body pressed against him sent a shiver down his spine, all his words dying in his throat.
“Hey, it's alright…William, right? I was kind of careless standing in the way like that too,” Est said as he steadied himself.
He remembered my name. Oh my god. The puppy inside William's heart jumped around in circles as his heart rate went up and a faint blush creeped up his neck.
Est stepped back a little to put a normal, respectable distance between them. William already missed the warmth. He said, “It's really my fault, Phi. Are you okay? Are you hurt anywhere?”
Est smiled, “Not at all, William. I'm okay.”
After collecting the books that had fallen to the ground earlier with William helping him, Est asked, “So, what are you doing in this section? I don't usually find students who aren't a part of our department here.”
William let out a dramatic sigh and launched into a story about how their professor Sataporn had given them a task on literature collection and how he insisted they had to include some of the physical text books as part of the reference and how he threatened them that their final score depended on this assignment.
Est sighed, “Sounds exactly like him. He would not accept the digital versions, and randomly check if you actually have those books with you. You can't just bluff and get away with it.”
William nodded furiously, “Exactly, P’Est! I am trying to find these obscure textbooks which seem to be older than my father. I have been standing here for half an hour trying and failing to locate any of them, and even the library assistant isn't sure if they still have those books. But the professor insisted the books are here! And he said if I can't find them, that's because of my incompetence. I don't understand why these professors love torturing students, Phi. I am trying not to crash out,” he was almost on the verge of tears.
Est pondered for a moment, before holding his hand out, “Give me the list of books. I know this entire section like the back of my hand. I can help you find them.”
William's eyes widened, “Phi, are you sure? You.. you must be busy. I don't want to bother you.”
Est smiled reassuringly, “Nonsense. I am free for the whole afternoon anyway. And it'll take me barely five minutes. Now, hand over the list.”
William and Est found themselves at a quiet cafe near the campus after finding the books. William insisted he owed him at least a cup of coffee for helping him, and after multiple minutes of argument, Est finally agreed but only on the condition he would pay for the desserts. The walk to the cafe was pleasant and filled with chatter as they found themselves slipping into a shared ease.
The cafe was relatively empty as it was post-lunch hour and too early for the evening rush, save for some students from their university hunched over their laptops, typing furiously. William ran to the brightest corner with a wide French window and a table with two chairs as he settled his backpack containing his precious goods he acquired from the library earlier. He pulled out a chair and gestured Est to sit, and said “After you.” Est chuckled in response as he sat down and placed his own bag near William's.
When the drinks they ordered arrived, William noticed a puppy charm on Est’s phone, and he asked, “That’s a cute charm! Do you like dogs, Phi?”
Est opened his phone to show William his lockscreen. It was an adorable picture of Est’s face half hidden in the mane of a golden retriever whose face filled most of Est’s phone screen. He held up his phone proudly, and said, “His name is PB. He's my son. He lives with my parents and my sister though.”
William gasped, “He's so adorable! Wait, Phi, let me show you something,” as he lifted his own phone up to show his lockscreen wallpaper of himself and his own dog.
Est laughed, “Oh my God, we kind of have matching wallpapers! What is the name of this cutie?”
William said, “William Jakrapatr,” as his smile turned mischievous.
Est gave him an unimpressed look.
“Okay, I was joking. His name is Chowon. He lives with my parents too. I miss him all the time,” William said, with a hint of longing. “He's so precious to me,” he added.
Est's eyes softened, “ I can see. I feel the same about PB.”
“Phi! We should bring them to meet each other! Like a playdate!” William’s playful energy returned as he started bouncing his legs. “I'm sure they are going to love each other.”
Est nodded, “Sounds good. We should definitely do it sometime.”
With a new common interest unlocked, their conversation flowed freely. Hours passed as the afternoon melted into the early hours of evening. By that time they had talked about everything and the topics ranged from their hobbies, families, academics, career goals and future plans.
Except one thing. Their dating life.
William subtly shifted the subject, “It's so hard to find someone who would match my wavelength, Phi. Not to mention the crazy work load. I've been staying painfully single for the past year. What about you, P’Est? How do you manage everything on top of juggling a graduate thesis?” as he prayed so hard that Est would take the bait.
Est narrowed his eyes, “That's a very roundabout way to ask someone if they're single.”
William choked on his drink. “I- Phi- No! I mean yes! FUCK-” he slapped his hand over his mouth in horror.
Stupid, stupid William.
Est, clearly entertained, laughed freely. “I was just teasing you, William. And you're right, I am busy with the lab and my work, as is. And I haven't found anyone interesting enough for me to date,” he paused before adding, “yet.” His smile softened, bordering on shy.
William felt his insides melt into a puddle of goo as he thought, ‘Time to change that, P’Est.’
William was walking in the hallway of their faculty, holding Nut’s hand and swinging it back and forth. Tui was flanking Nut’s other side, as Nut was busy sharing some interesting gossip.
That was when William spotted Est standing in front of one of the student lounges, busy staring at his phone and frowning. William stopped to plant one loud, wet kiss each on Nut and Tui's cheeks who went “Ew!” at the same time as he waved “See you later!” and he skipped ahead and ran towards Est.
“PHI EST! HI!”
Startled, Est looked up from his phone only to come face to face with a smiling, flushed, panting William. Est's eyes crinkled as he smiled at the younger, ruffling his hair as he said, “William, breathe.”
William giggled, cheeks turning red, as he composed himself and asked, “What are you doing here, Phi?”
“Oh. I came here to meet a friend. You might know him, it's Pepper, he's in the same year as me. He was supposed to help me with a software, but now that I'm here, I can't find him. He isn't picking up his phone either,” the frown returned to Est’s face, as his eyes darted around, still expecting his friend to walk in.
“How long have you been waiting for, P’Est?”
“Uh. Almost an hour now.”
William’s expression turned sour. “It's not nice of him to make you wait like this, Phi.”
“He's probably stuck somewhere, William. Usually I wouldn't mind waiting, but I'm a little desperate today. I have a deadline, I need this analysis done and the report submitted by tomorrow morning. My research grant is on the line and I don't know what to do,” Est looked visibly stressed.
William’s expression turned sour. Suddenly, a thought struck him. “P’Est, show me your data. I think I can help you with the software part. It should be doable.”
Est hesitated, “I don't want to bother you, William.”
William clutched his chest dramatically, “Phi, you hurt me. I got a perfect score on my assignment last time because of your help. It's only right if I help you this time,” as he gave him his best puppy eyes.
Unable to resist the cuteness, Est gave in. “Okay, only because you insist,” and he let himself be dragged by an enthusiastic William.
As it turned out, William was exceptionally good at it. His fingers flew across the keyboard of Est’s laptop as he explained patiently, while Est listened with rapt attention, taking notes of every step. Two hours later, William saved the final output file in Est’s laptop as he said, “P’Est, it's done. This is the last one.”
Est, overcome by a wave of relief and gratitude, hugged William. “Thank you so much, Will. I don't know what I would've done without you.”
William’s brain screamed at him in pure shock. He froze, unable to think of anything else, mind going blank as he muttered, “Anytime, P’Est.”
Est registered their surroundings as he hastily pulled back, ears red, as he looked everywhere but William. William’s whole face was a shade that rivalled that of a ripe tomato, as he tried to calm himself down, smiling awkwardly.
Est returned the smile with his own, as he said, “But seriously, Will. I owe you big time. I should buy you a coffee this time.”
An idea bloomed in William's mind. “P’Est. How about you tutor me?”
“Huh?”
“I mean, think about it. You help me with Ento in your free time. I barely passed the fundamentals course last semester. I definitely need someone's guidance this time. In return, I will help you with your data. We can set up the meetings based on our schedules. It's a win-win.”
Est considered the offer for a brief moment, after shrugging, “Sure, why not. Let's do it.”
Est somehow always made sure he found time for William amidst his busy schedule, and William always made sure to drop by Est’s lab with random excuses, sometimes even bringing Est's favourite coffee and a snack when he knew he would've skipped his lunch. Est always knew to leave William a bar of his favourite chocolate with a simple handwritten note on days when William’s classes dragged on and things got hectic. They knew each other's schedules by heart, and always found time to sneak in between classes and lab hours to check up on each other. William would sometimes drag Nut and Tui to the tutoring sessions, and Est introduced his other labmates Tam and Tose to William, who had taken an instant liking to the younger. Perth joined them sometimes in teasing William until Est yelled at them to leave the boy alone, looking shy and bashful himself.
By the time the mid-semester exam results came out, William was shocked to find his name at the top. He had scored a perfect 20 on 20 in the subject, surpassing everyone in their class. Nut looked at him with newfound respect, while Tui wiped an imaginary tear as he clapped William’s shoulder proudly, “I always knew you had it, kiddo. Don't forget mama when you become famous.”
William sputtered, “Shut the fuck up Tui. I don't even know how this happened,” as he wiped his glasses again and again before wearing them to stare at his laptop screen for the hundredth time, and his name still stayed at the top of the list every time he looked at it.
“Looks like the tutoring worked really well, Liam. Who would've known getting a crush on a hot senior was the trick to rewire your brain?” Nut teased.
“You should let P’Est know, Will. He would be so happy,” Tui said, with a genuine smile on his face.
P’Est.
That broke William out of his daze. “You're right. I need to see him right now.”
“Then what are you doing sitting here, loverboy? Go to him,” Nut laughed, as William leapt out of his chair and started running.
Est was at his dorm room, typing on his laptop when he heard a knock at his door. He opened the door only to find William half-bent and breathless, still looking ecstatic. His glasses threatened to fall out of his face and he was drenched from head-to-toe. Once the door opened fully, William leapt into Est’s arms and engulfed him in a hug, clinging like a koala as he spun them both around. Est stumbled backwards into his dorm room, trying to steady them both while he asked, “Willy? What happened?”
William pulled back a little to show Est his phone, “P’Est! See! I got a perfect score!”
Est took the phone from his hand, and as he looked at the contents of the screen, his face bloomed into a smile full of pride and admiration. “You did it, Willy! I'm so proud of you!” as he hugged him, swaying side to side.
William basked in the warmth of the hug, as he whispered, “It's all thanks to you, P’Est.”
Est shook his head, “No. Don't give all the credits to me, sugar. You wrote the exam. You deserve this.”
They stood frozen at the door, lost in each other for a while, before the wet and sticky feeling became impossible to ignore. Est pulled away reluctantly, taking a proper look at William and he asked, “Why are you wet?”
William looked embarrassed. “I ran to you when I got my scores, and it started raining midway. I thought if I ran faster I could make it in time, but the rain got bigger and by the time I reached here, I was fully drenched.”
Est looked exasperated, “You idiot puppy. Go shower and dry your hair before you get sick.”
William hesitated, “But Phi… I don't have a change of clothes.”
Est contemplated something for a moment, before saying, “It's fine. I can give you something of mine to wear. Now go,” as he pushed William towards the bathroom.
Once the bathroom door closed, Est took a look around his room and started obsessively tidying up everything. He saved the file he was working on and shut down his laptop. He closed the random books which were left open and put them back in their designated spaces in the shelves, picked up the sheets of paper which were spread out on his coffee table in an organised mess which only made sense to him and arranged them neatly in their folder. He opened the window and let the faint, post-rain breeze enter and cool his room, and checked the room for any weird smells. He even confirmed that the folds of his blanket were perfectly straight and symmetrical, satisfied only when they looked impeccable according to his standards.
It was when he was fussing over the arrangement of cups and pots on the small counter of his kitchenette, Est realised he was actually feeling nervous.
It wasn't the first time he had William in his room, and it definitely wasn't the first time he had slept over here. But something felt different this time. Maybe it was the way William had crashed into him earlier without a care in the world, or how Est’s breath hitched when William's cold, rain-soaked fingers clutched his bare arms, the contact sending electricity down his spine, or how Est’s own heart swelled with pride and something dangerously close to affection at the way William ran all the way from his room in the rain, just because he couldn't wait to share his happiness with Est.
Est gripped the counter hard as his mind ran a mile a minute, supplying him with multiple images from the times he had spent with William.
William looking up at him with a pout. William staring at Est when he thought Est wasn't paying attention. William bringing him a sandwich from the street stall Est liked, nagging him about skipping his lunch again. William picking a weed flower he found beautiful on the roadside, offering it to Est. William teaching Est how to code, impossibly patient and kind even as Est stumbled over the same mistake multiple times. William crying over a random documentary about stray animals, with Est offering his hands in support.
In all the images, William never left Est’s side for even a minute. And Est realised with startling clarity that he never wanted him to leave.
Somewhere along the way, Est had fallen for the boy who always wore a smile on his face, and his heart on his sleeves.
The fluttering feeling inside him when Tam or Tose teased him whenever William was around finally had a name.
Est liked William.
It was so obvious, it was there all along, just waiting for Est to wake up and discover it one day. That realisation should have terrified Est. But he found it freeing and oddly comforting.
The bathroom door clicked open, shattering the silence and William stepped out, the steam from the hot shower he just took spilling out around him. Est turned from where stood at the counter and took in the sight of William. William was dressed in one of Est's button up shirts and sweatpants, his rimless glasses perched atop his nose at their usual spot, with a towel around his neck and his hair dripping wet. The shirt hung a bit loose on his frame, and he left the first two buttons open, leaving his collarbones and the top of his chest visible. He moved unhurriedly, eyes darting around the room and taking in everything.
Est stood motionless at the counter as his eyes roamed all over William. The soft overhead light hit William in all the right places, making him look dreamy. All air got stolen out of Est’s lungs when he saw the exposed skin, the pink flush from the shower a stark contrast against the white of the shirt William was wearing. His shirt. A possessive feeling coiled deep in his core, as he processed his feelings.
Oh. I don't just like him. I think I want him.
The images his mind supplied him started shifting slowly. The new ones were from their future, the one that Est wanted to build with William. William and Est holding hands, as they walked back and forth between their dorm rooms, laughing together. William and Est standing in the kitchen of an apartment, wearing matching aprons, feeding each other pieces of food. William and Est on a date, with Chowon and PB running ahead. William kissing Est deeply, as he slowly fell apart under his arms. William sleeping, with Est smiling softly at his sleeping face, admiring him.
As Est continued staring, a drop of water fell from William's hair on his chest, and it rolled down before disappearing into the depths of his shirt. Est’s eyes followed the path, his pink lips parting slightly in a daze. He mindlessly took a step forward, as if wanting to chase it.
William’s eyes met the yearning look in Est’s eyes, pieces of a puzzle suddenly clicking in place. With each passing second, he was becoming painfully aware of the growing tension between them. Careful not to disturb the fragile atmosphere, he took hesitant steps towards Est, at the same time as something seemed to shift in Est and they both crossed the last of the distance between them, stopping only when their faces were inches apart.
Between their glossy eyes, parted lips and shared breath, something became very evident to William, that maybe, his feelings weren't as one-sided as he thought.
William looked into Est’s eyes, pleading with him to do something, anything. He was the epitome of restraint as he suppressed his own urges to give Est the space and freedom to cross the final boundary on his own.
Est seemed to perfectly read all of William’s silences. He knew he was standing at the precipice, and William was letting him make his own choice, knowing very well if he takes this leap, there's no going back. But he found himself wanting to choose it anyway.
If I walk away from this now, I might never get another chance.
Est carefully lifted his hand, softly touching and caressing William's cheek. William leaned into the touch, his eyes never leaving Est for even a single second, asking, waiting, begging for more.
Est leaned closer, rubbing his nose against William tenderly. William's mouth parted, as a soft sigh of relief escaped him, the tension leaving his shoulders as they slumped. The combined scent of his own shampoo and body wash on William made Est lose his mind a little. He pressed a soft kiss to William's cheek before he could think, and rested his forehead against William's.
William leaned back a little, his brown eyes meeting Est, anxiety evident in his usually confident voice, and asked, “Am I interesting enough for you, P’Est?”
Don't tell me I'm reading this all wrong. Don't tell me you don't want this too.
Est paused for a second while William waited with bated breath, before he said, “Let me find out,” as his lips met William.
The kiss wasn't all explosions or earthquakes or life-changing catastrophic events. Nothing dramatic happened in the world around them. The Earth still revolved around the Sun. The days still had 24 hours. The night still remained cool.
But the kiss had shifted something tectonic inside Est. He had finally stopped feeling like he was just existing, and found himself discovering the meaning of living. William had wrapped his arms around Est mid-kiss, and it felt like coming home finally after a long day, arriving where he truly belonged.
The parts of his life before meeting William felt like a relic of the past and he realised he did not want to go back. And he found himself becoming greedier with each passing second, wanting more and more of William to fill all his senses, drowning him until he could never resurface.
William was the first one to recover, and he pulled back a little, stopping Est with a firm hand to his chest when he chased after his lips. Est looked devastated, like a kid who got his favourite candy taken away from him, his beautiful, dark, glossy eyes shining and his heart shaped lips forming a mild pout.
William felt a surge of warmth flooding him, and he tightened his hold around Est as he said, “P’Est. I like you. I like you so much. I've liked you for so long. I've been gone since the moment you walked into that hall, into my life. I've wanted you like this so badly.”
The confession broke a dam inside Est, his heart feeling heavy and light at the same time, so full of bliss. He cupped William’s handsome face with both his hands, smiling as he said, “I really like you too, Will. I don't know when it happened, but all I know now is I am never letting you go. You're stuck with me forever, puppy,” as he showered his face with kisses, full of love.
William breathed in relief, his smile rivalling the sun, and without waiting a second, he surged forward to capture Est’s lips in another kiss.
The kiss started as slow, but soon, it wasn't enough. His lips found Est again and again, finding the feeling addictive. He poured the months of pent up feelings and longing into his kisses, still finding it inadequate.
Est was reeling from the euphoria, his own desperation evident as his hands found purchase in his shirt that William was wearing, as they twisted and grabbed the shirt and pulled William closer, shocking even himself in the process.
They were fully making out with each other, and William’s glasses started fogging up. Annoyed, he pulled his glasses away and threw them somewhere carelessly before diving in again to kiss along Est's jawline. Est tipped his head back and an involuntary gasp left him as William started leaving kisses on his throat and neck and goosebumps rose all over Est’s body.
William confessed against the sensitive skin below his ear, “It was a torture having you so close, not being able to touch you and feel you in all the ways I wanted to. I was losing my mind, Phi,” he said, as he nuzzled his face in the soft skin between Est’s neck and shoulder, leaving kisses and small bites all over, like a man starved.
Every word that escaped William's lips left Est gasping and shuddering, the sensation too much but somehow not enough at the same time, his fingers grabbing the thick locks of William's hair and he started tugging on them.
William let out a pleased sound, and his fingers slipped inside Est’s tank top, finding the bare skin of his waist and caressing reverently, leaving Est wanting for more. Pleased, William murmured against his neck, “You still haven't answered my question from earlier, Phi.”
Est stilled for a moment, confused, before he realised, and looked at William. William looked dishevelled in an extremely pleasant way, his face and neck a deep shade of crimson. The same spark of heat he felt when he saw William earlier in his shirt grew wilder in the pit of Est’s stomach and the intense need to feel him everywhere consumed his brain.
In a sudden, bold and reckless move that would have scandalized his own self from an hour ago, he grabbed William and pushed him on the bed, and wasted no time in getting on top of him. William’s pupils were blown wide with want and surprise, his chest heaving and lips parted in shock.
Est’s eyes were full of longing and desire as he said, “Who said I was done finding out?” before he met William’s lips once again.