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“Miranda,” Nigel says for the third time.
“Hmm”
“The layouts, are you happy with the last change?” Nigel asks, then follows Miranda’s gaze and adds, “will you just ask her out already”.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about”
“Andy. Your staring is becoming more obvious”
“I don’t stare”
“Your longing gaze is becoming more obvious,” Nigel amends.
“I’ll fire you”
“No you won’t”
“No, I won’t, but I’ll want to,” Miranda says, drawing a laugh from Nigel.
“She’ll say yes you know”
“No she won’t,” Miranda answers without thinking.
“Don’t” she says when Nigel’s grin widens.
“Ask her. And if she says no, you can fire her” Nigel teases.
“It’s utterly unprofessional” Miranda says.
“Not if she’s interested in you too,” Nigel picks up the layouts and heads out Miranda’s office. “Ask her, Miranda,” he says before he shuts Miranda’s office door.
Taking a deep breath, Miranda walks out to the outer office.
Miranda is grateful that Emily is still out fetching 10 or 15 skirts from Calvin Klein.
Andrea looks up expectantly as Miranda stops in front of her desk, ready to action whatever whim Miranda has now.
“Would you be interested in having dinner at that new restaurant in Chelsea?” Miranda asks without meeting Andrea’s eyes.
“Do you mean ‘Chez Très Fancy’?” Andrea asks.
“Yes” Miranda says, picking up a pen off the desk.
“Oh… Emily went there last week and got sick,” Andrea says carefully. “Don’t go there. I don’t want you to get sick too.”
Andrea starts typing on her computer. “I can get you a list of new French restaurants in Chelsea so you can go somewhere better.”
“Never mind” Miranda says and returns to her office and sinks in her seat.
I will fire Nigel, she thinks to herself.
————————-
They are at Pier 59 on a chilly morning, watching the Runway staff set up a photoshoot.
“You need to be clearer this time, Miranda,” Nigel says.
“I was quite clear” Miranda huffs, “and I most certainly will not try again.”
“Miranda, it doesn’t count as an attempt if Andy didn’t understand you.”
The conversation ends when they both notice Emily and Andrea arrive.
Andrea hands both Nigel and Miranda their Starbucks order.
Nigel gives Miranda a single, slow nod, his lips curving into a knowing smirk that says go on.
Miranda turns to Andrea. “I have two tickets to Wicked! this weekend if you’d like to see it.”
“Wow, Miranda!”
Miranda starts to smile. Success!
“I’ve been dying to see it, and this weekend is my friend Lily’s birthday, and I didn’t know what to do for her… so this is perfect” Andrea beams.
“I’m going to call her right now” she practically skips away to make the call.
Miranda’s smile does not form. Failure!
When Andrea is out of earshot, Nigel lets out a loud laugh. “I said to be clearer, Miranda.”
Emily stares at them in stunned silence, eventually sputtering out, “Oh my god, you just asked Andrea out.”
“It’s her second attempt,” Nigel says, ignoring Miranda’s glare.
“Nigel, does all of Runway need to know my business?” Miranda hisses.
“Now Emily can help too, and clearly you needed it,” Nigel smirks.
“Clearly” Miranda says dryly.
“Well” Miranda asks Emily.
“You… actually want my… help?” Emily chokes out.
“Well, I’ve already been humiliated twice, so yes,” Miranda sighs.
They wait.
“I got it!” Emily exclaims.
“Ok, spit it out” Miranda says when Emily doesn’t continue.
“A Knicks game” Emily says as if she’s just invented a calorie-free donut.
“Sport” Miranda says in disgust.
“Try it, Miranda” Nigel encourages.
——————-
“Thanks again for the Wicked! tickets, Miranda,” Andrea says when Miranda deposits her handbag and coat on Andrea’s desk the next Monday morning. “I had a great time.”
“I’m glad one of us did,” Miranda mutters under her breath.
“Sorry?” Andrea asks.
“I said I’d like coffee.”
“I’ll be right back,” Andrea says, already scrambling out of her seat.
As the day winds down, Emily slips into Miranda’s office.
“Two courtside tickets to the Knicks game on Wednesday” Emily says, placing the tickets on Miranda’s desk.
“And these are good seats?” Miranda asks as she examines the tickets.
“The best,” Emily nods, “and I’ve cleared your schedule for that night.”
“Good luck, Miranda.”
Miranda wonders why she’s subjecting herself to more humiliation but goes to Andrea nonetheless.
“Andréa,” Miranda coughs.
“Yes, Miranda.”
“The Knicks.”
“Yes?”
“Wednesday night.”
“Ok?”
Nigel’s words, “be clearer,” echo in Miranda’s head before she continues.
“The Knicks have a game this Wednesday night, and Emily has cleared my schedule. I have two tickets for that game. Courtside tickets. To the Knicks game.”
Miranda pauses to let the words sink in.
“Two tickets” she says again deliberately.
“That’s great, Miranda!”
“Two.”
“Ok.”
“A pair.”
“Nice?”
“Would you like to see the game?” Miranda clarifies.
“I would like to see the game” Andrea says.
Miranda feels relief wash over her.
“In fact, I am seeing the game” Andrea continues.
“Yes. With me” Miranda says, confused.
“Yes, we are both going to the game” Andrea says, oblivious to Miranda’s growing distress.
“I’d love to have courtside tickets though. My tickets are in the nosebleed section” Andrea rummages through her drawer to retrieve the tickets. “Section 317. Still, I’m excited to go.”
Miranda blinks once, very slowly, as if trying to reboot her own eyes after witnessing something so violently stupid.
“Don’t” Miranda says back in her office when Emily tries to say something.
Emily shakes her head at Andrea when she returns to her desk.
“How lucky is that mystery person that Miranda is taking to the game!” Andrea says wistfully.
Emily wonders if Miranda would stop HR firing her if she threw a stapler at Andrea right now.
—————-
The team are leaving James Holt’s showing when Andrea comments on a particular dress she loved.
“That last dress looked so sleek and beautiful.”
Miranda seizing on the opportunity says, “I could buy it for you, Andréa.”
Andrea’s eyes widen.
“Miranda, that’s incredibly generous, but I can’t let you do that.”
Miranda’s face falls slightly but valiantly continues. “And you could wear it and let me take you for a drink tonight.”
Smooth, Miranda thinks.
Andrea smiles.
“Oh, that’s actually really smart.”
Miranda brightens.
“It is?”
“Yes! If you buy it, you’ll be able to see how it looks in a real life setting before deciding whether to feature it.”
Miranda stares.
Andrea continues enthusiastically:
“And discussing it over drinks tonight will let you decide before the meeting at 9 a.m. tomorrow.”
“…”
“You’re always thinking ahead.”
Meanwhile, Emily has stopped walking and Nigel has walked directly into a mannequin.
——————-
When the morning run through concludes, Nigel and Emily linger behind.
Emily rubs her temples.
“We’ve tried culture.”
“We’ve tried sport.”
Nigel nods gravely.
“At this point I think she’s immune to courtship.”
“No” Miranda interjects.
“Whatever you’re both going to suggest next, no.”
“Miranda, yes you’re being clearer. But not clear enough, it seems” Nigel says. “You need to try a more direct approach.”
“Tell Andy you’re going on a date” Emily adds.
“Why do I keep listening to you both?” Miranda says.
“Because left to your own devices, you’ll just stare at her until she cries. Go on, try again. Now” Nigel says.
“So you can witness me make a fool of myself”Miranda accuses.
“Yes.” Nigel and Emily say in unison.
Miranda marches up to Andrea’s desk confidently.
“The New York Philharmonic is performing tonight” Miranda says commandingly. “I could arrange box seats.”
“It can be a date” Miranda adds clearly.
“A date?” Andrea’s smile falters.
“Yes.”
“Oh,” Andrea says, her brain visibly short-circuiting as she tries to think which billionaire, model, or European princess Miranda could possibly be dating.
“Oh, you don’t want it to be a date” Miranda thinks sadly.
“You deserve to have a good time” Andrea says, trying to sound happy for Miranda.
Miranda’s face blanks.
“Miranda?”
“Never mind” Miranda says, her voice dropping below freezing as she turns on her heel.
Back in her office, Nigel and Emily are already opening their mouths to speak.
“Don’t” Miranda snaps, pointing a single threatening finger at them before they can even breathe.
“To be fair, it was better this time” Nigel says.
When Emily returns to the outer office, Andrea asks, “Miranda’s dating again?”
Emily closes her eyes.
“Apparently”
Andrea looks miserable. “Why can’t it be with me.”
Emily briefly considers throwing herself out the nearest window.
————-
“One last time, Miranda,” Nigel says. “You’ve come too far to give up now.”
“I think try casual this time” Emily suggests.
“Andy probably thinks you’re giving her a task so she’s in work mode.”
“She makes a good point, Miranda” Nigel says.
“I will literally fire you both.”
“Coffee date” Nigel says, ignoring that comment.
“In Central Park. Maybe a walk too. Casual” Emily says.
“This is absolutely the last attempt” Miranda says.
Miranda goes to Andrea’s desk again.
“Hi” Miranda says nonchalantly.
“Uh hi, Miranda. What can I do for you?”
“I was thinking, nothing serious, just…”
Miranda looks back at Emily and Nigel for encouragement and sees Emily make a drinking gesture with her hand.
“Coffee”
“Yes, I’ll get you coffee right away, Miranda”Andrea says, already standing.
“Wait.”
“Yes?”
“I thought we could get coffee… casually… in Central Park.”
Miranda exhales before continuing. “All casual, but together, and for a walk maybe.”
“Fresh air” Miranda adds when Andrea says nothing.
“Oh, Miranda, I understand.”
“Finally.”
For one glorious second Miranda thinks she’s won.
And then:
“Yes, I understand, Miranda.”
“Wonderful.”
“Yes, you need a break” Andrea says.
“No, that’s not-”
“I’ll clear your afternoon and tell Roy to bring the town car around. You enjoy your solo walk!” Andrea beams, already punching digits into the desk phone, entirely blind to the way Miranda’s face has frozen into stone.
——————
In an Elias-Clark meeting room, Miranda has finished shooting down all the ideas for next month’s issue, causing the staff to scurry out of the room.
“Miranda, we have one final idea” Nigel starts.
“Andrea Sachs, will you go on a date with me, Miranda Priestly? A romantic date. I am courting you” Emily says. “You need to say these exact words.”
“We even wrote them down on a post-it for you” Nigel says, handing Miranda a bright pink post-it note.
“A post-it” Miranda shoots them both a withering stare, placing the offending note on top of the layouts as if it were contaminated.
“I think we have to accept that Andréa simply does not desire to go on a date with me” Miranda says sadly. “She’s not an idiot.”
Nigel and Emily exchange a look.
“Perhaps Andy thinks you’re just being nicer because of that HR training the Board made you take?” Nigel offers.
“I’m the idiot for not taking no for an answer the first time” Miranda continues.
“But Miranda-” Nigel protests.
“No. We’ll never speak a word of this again” she says, leaving them alone in the room.
Miranda stops by Andrea’s desk on her way to retreat to her office.
Placing a copy of the layout on Andrea’s desk, she instructs Andrea, “Make five copies of this and give to Nigel. Make sure no one disturbs me for the rest of the day.”
At the print room, Andrea places the layout on the copier, noticing the pink post-it note for the first time.
She reads it once.
Twice.
Three times.
Then:
“Oh.”
The colour drains from her face.
“OH.”
Every conversation comes flooding back to Andrea.
“Would you be interested in having dinner at that new restaurant in Chelsea?”
“Oh no.”
Emily got food poisoning.
Andrea had warned Miranda not to go.
Another memory slams into place.
“I have two tickets to Wicked! this weekend if you’d like to see it.”
“Oh My God.”
Miranda hadn’t been giving away theatre tickets.
Miranda had been asking her out.
“The Knicks. Wednesday night.”
Two tickets.
A pair.
Two.
A pair.
Andrea groans and drops her forehead onto the photocopier.
“I could buy it for you”
The dress.
The drinks.
Miranda flirting.
Miranda.
Flirting.
The photocopier beeps.
Andrea chooses to interpret it as judgment.
Then:
“It can be a date”
Andrea closes her eyes.
“No.”
She’d spent that entire conversation feeling sorry for herself because she thought Miranda was dating someone else.
And then the final blow:
“I thought we could get coffee… casually… in Central Park.”
“Oh My God”
Not once.
Not twice.
Not three times.
Miranda Priestly had asked her out repeatedly.
And Andrea had accidentally rejected her every single time.
“Emily is going to kill me”
Andrea spins around and marches toward Miranda’s office.
Because if Miranda had survived asking her out six times, Andrea could survive one conversation.
—————-
Andrea walks into Miranda’s office without knocking.
Miranda looks up immediately.
“Who told you to come in?”
Andrea doesn’t answer. She just walks straight to the desk.
Miranda’s voice sharpens. “Didn’t I make it clear I was not to be disturbed?”
Still nothing.
That’s when Miranda’s expression shifts…less anger, more tired, more guarded.
“If this is about layouts-”
Andrea places the pink post-it on the desk.
Miranda stops.
Silence.
Her eyes drop to it, then back to Andrea.
Something flickers across her face: embarrassment first, then sadness, then immediately she contorts her face into aloofness.
“If you’re here to politely reject me again”
Miranda begins, voice cool but tight.
“I’m not” Andrea says quickly.
Miranda doesn’t move. Doesn’t breathe properly.
“…then what are you doing?”
Andrea gives a small, slightly breathless smile.
“I’m saying yes.”
For a moment, Miranda just stares at her.
Then, very quietly:
“…finally.”
Miranda exhales, composure slipping back into place by force of habit.
“You have no idea how utterly humiliating it’s been” she huffs, though there’s no real heat to it, more relief than anger.
Andrea laughs softly.
“I think I might”
————-
“So do you want to see Wicked! as our first date?” Andrea asks.
“No. You’ve already seen it.”
“I don’t mind watching it again” Andrea says lightly.
“Okay, what about dinner at a fancy French restaurant?”
“No. I wouldn’t want you to get sick.”
“How about a Knicks game? I’d really love courtside tickets.”
“I hate sport” Miranda says flatly.
Andrea pauses. “Then why did you ask me first?”
“It was Emily’s idea” Miranda replies, then adds more quietly, “and I wanted to make you happy.”
A faint blush rises despite herself when Andrea smiles.
“Okay,” Andrea says, clearly enjoying this now.
“Coffee in the park?”
She adds, a little too innocently, “All casual.”
Miranda gives her a look.
“No.”
“Why not?”
“Because last time I attempted that, I was assigned a recreational break and effectively dismissed from my own date.”
Andrea laughs, properly this time, bright and unguarded.
Miranda’s mouth twitches despite herself.
“Right” Andrea says, catching her breath.
“Okay… how about you let me surprise you on our first date?”
Miranda’s answer is immediate.
“Yes”
Andrea smiles, softer now. “Okay. I’ll plan something.”
“Good”
Nigel appears in the doorway first.
“…Did I just witness success?” he asks carefully.
Emily is right behind him.
“She said yes?” she repeats, stunned.
Miranda doesn’t look away from Andrea.
“Yes.”
Nigel exhales.
“Just so it’s on record, I have been trying to achieve that outcome for weeks and instead received threats of termination and emotional damage.”
“Same” Emily says flatly.
Andrea glances at them.
Miranda doesn’t even turn.
“Leave.”
They hesitate.
“Now.”
They go.
Silence returns.
Andrea looks at Miranda, a small smile tugging at her mouth.
“So” she says, “you really like me.”
Miranda exhales. “Could I not have made it any clearer, Andréa?”
Andrea tilts her head. “No. You were impressively subtle.”
“Subtle!” Miranda snaps. “You were utterly clueless.”
“I wasn’t clueless” Andrea says.
“You rejected me six times.”
“Because I thought you were being… Miranda.”
“That is not an excuse.”
“It’s an explanation.”
Miranda exhales. “Half of New York could tell I was interested in you.”
“But you never actually said it” Andrea points out.
“I repeatedly suggested romantic occasions we could enjoy together” Miranda says flatly.
Andrea smiles. “And I never got it.”
“You absolutely should have.”
Miranda stares. “…Extraordinary.”
Andrea steps closer. “You were not unclear, Miranda. I was just-“
Miranda raises a brow.
“…too busy pining over you, wondering who you might be dating, to see what was right in front of me.”
Then without hesitation, Miranda moves to Andrea and leans in.
Her lips capture Andrea’s in a kiss that’s sure, commanding, and unmissable.
Andrea melts instantly, her hands rising to rest against Miranda’s chest. Six failed invitations and countless misunderstandings disappear all at once.
When Miranda finally pulls back, her forehead resting lightly against Andrea’s, she whispers:
“Clear enough?”
Andrea exhales, breathless, a slow smile spreading across her face.
“Perfectly.”