Chapter Text
I´m walking towards my house on a random tuesday afternoon. I do not care what day it is. I stumble, pick up my pace and scrape my fragile knees on the floor, my hands grabbing the dust on the street. A soft globule of blood appears on my peachy skin. Fuck. It grows bigger and bigger till my whole leg is covered in this sticky maroon substance. I call out a mixed cry of painful sounds, like the wolf that is left ashore after running through the forest in escape of the shepherd, who now has bought a long shot pistol on the gun store 40 kilometers next to his house ; and who´s sheep is a different kind of challenge of a dinner; this lonesome wolf is left panting on the wet sand, injured on the left hip and waiting for the other canines to come for a rescue. But there´s no one. Thats my life. Life is chasing me with a gun and i want it to pull the fucking trigger because i´m tired, like that wolf. But i see a light. THE light. I approach it, like an injured antelope, whose legs are bitten off and can only use two or three, slowly prancing onto the savannah; thinking "This is it".
This was only the beggining.
Hey
HEY
"Hey dude are you ok??" a familiar voice limbered and tingled in my head.
"Fucking guess" yeah mmm, not my best response. But i was bleeding out so i guess my head wasn´t that aware of things around me, or people.
"Chill, jus- just let me pick you up Ben" He responded, kinda annoyed in the brain, kinda worried in the heart.
As my eyes went cloudy and my mind calmed down, all i remembered was seeing him and some flashing lights in the background.
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"Mike? Whu- what the fuck are you doing in my house AAH-" when i finally woke up I ran, or at least tried to, towards Mike, grabbing a piece of couch to throw at him, when i remembered that my feet took vacation days and did not collaborate with me that moment
BLAM
I´m so stupid.
"Why are you like this" he exclaimed as he picked me up from the cold floor now stained red and i stained purple on the knees
"Dunno, born this way" i slurred my words and stepped a bit onto him. He caught me, but we both fell over and chuckled over.
My hangover was obvious, my breath stank of Johnie Walker yet i wasn´t exactly rich; how i afforded it you may not ask: A friend of a friend likes me and she invited me over to enjoy drinking fancy liquor.
"What she d-didn´t know was that i had a girlfrrriend, and when she checccked my phhhhone while i was in the bbbathroooom, M´kayla had texted me (NOOOOOOO) yes, and she cried out loud to mmmister dadddy. " i sobbered up and continued the story with a glass of water in my sistem" He got angry at me and in a drunken state i shouted back that i only used her for alcohol (Come on you can´t be that much of a jerk while at a friend´s house) sorry not sorry what can i say, i´m sooooo charming (fuck you idiot) well well let me continue the fucking story shall we? Good. Then they kick me out, i almost get arrested and i walked 20 miles to my house, because i didnt think you were FUCKING GONNA ROB ME" I´m now standing and pointing at him, another piece of couch on my hand, this time a bigger one.
He looked at me like i was a lunatic.
I hated it
My whole life i was treated like the crazy one, the guy whose girlfriends couldn´t cross the emotional barrier, way past the sexual and friendship ones. All of the passing 20 i had either
1- Died (suicide or terrible accidents)
2-Left me
3-Or just straight out ghosted me (may be included in 1 or 2)
I´m the only son, no uncles no cousins, only absent and angry parents. I moved out, or well technically got kicked out at 18, just in time for my birthday. Some families took me in, but after the fuck ups, i got ditched. I went through a total of 12 homes. Friends, girlfriends, bosses, etc; all firsthand connections. Nobody trusted me. They still don´t. I finally was able to pay a small department on Liquilt Avenue, close to my job as a janitor. At 25 i´m a failure.
"i just can´t catch a break man" my eyes filled up with tears as i fell onto his arms
"WOAH WOAH DUDE you ain´t exactly a feather you know, let´s let´s just sit down for a bit