Chapter Text
(Flashback - 3 years ago)
——
"Everyone! wait— where's Sunoo?" Sunghoon looks around, Sunoo being no where to be seen.
Why? In a moment like this?
Jay glances up from his phone and shrugs. "Uhh, he's still getting ready... why? do you need him?" Sunghoon sighs heavily, running his fingers through his hair.
Yeah. I do.
"I— I'll tell him later..." Sunghoon mutters, playing with the hem of his sleeve, not looking anyone in the eye.
where's sunoo?
"what is this meeting about?" Jay speaks up again, irritation evident in his tone. "You do realize that we'll be late if we don't leave soon? We're gonna get a penalty for sure!" Jay glares at Sunghoon, who was already annoyed by his antics from earlier, and definitely by the ones right now.
————
Flashback -
"Can you stop hitting me with your shirt? It's all sweaty!"
"It's not that sweaty—"
"ITS A DIFFERENT COLOR SUNGHOON?"
"Does that really matter?" Sunghoon balls the shirt up before throwing it to Jay's face.
"I'm gonna kill you."
————
Jungwon makes an unsure look.
"Jay hyung's right... We have to soon." He exhales, looking down at his watch. Already somewhat stressing out on the inside since they've already been late for the past two days.
Not something Mr. Bang PD, particularly likes.
"Or more like... right now."
"Just wait! two minutes! I wanna show you guys someone—"
"Speed it up." Jake and Niki say in unison.
Heeseung stands up from the couch, grabbing his gym bag, "I'll wait in the. car—"
"No!" Sunghoon pushes back Heeseung, causing him to almost fall over.
"What the hell? What was that for?"
"Just stay! A second... please. Come on, it'll be worth your time!"
The lack of playfulness in his voice is what makes everyone pause and actually pay attention.
"...Fine, make it quick?" Jungwon taps his foot on the wooden floor, waiting.
Everyone looks over at Jungwon, making a silent agreement to hear out Sunghoon, despite being in a rush.
"Okay okay!" Sunghoon composes himself.
It won't be that bad.
"Everyone meet... Mila. My girlfriend," Sunghoon opens the front door and as pulls Mila in, his fingers lace up with hers.
It's not evident on Sunghoon's face but deep down he hopes they like her...
I mean he loves her.
...
Right?
”Hi everyone! Sorry for barging in as you’re about to leave.” Mila steps into the room, head to toe in an outfit that doesn’t really help an idol relationship, stay in disguise.
Bright blue, head to toe in Chanel.
It was impossible not to divert your eyes to it.
The room suddenly fell silent.
And not the good kind.
The kind that instantly showed Sunghoon, something was wrong.
Showed him exactly what he didn’t want to see.
”We’ve been dating for four months now?” Sunghoon says, voice shaking. Slapping on a smile that puts on a facade, and that doesn’t quite reach his eyes.
”y-your girlfriend?” Jake steps closer to Heeseung, slightly stumbling.
”Four months?” Heeseung, someone who supports his members, no matter what, the one who backs up.
…Suddenly doesn’t?
Jay looks at Sunghoon up and down, irritation gone and replaced with confusion written all over his face.
Niki walks over to Jungwon, leaning down and whispering into his ear. “Does he know?”
”That idols can’t date? Yeah… he knows…”
Jungwon and Niki look over to see Sunghoon giving a kiss to Mila.
"What's Sunoo hyung gonna think...?" Niki asks, voice low.
"It won't be good... we'll be there to comfort him, okay Niki?"
Niki looks down the hallway, staring down Sunoo's door. "Yeah—"
Sunoo's door opens, Sunoo walks out, mirror in hand.
"Sunghoon hyung! Do you have my—" Sunoo walks into the room and freezes at the sight of Sunghoon with a girl he's never seen before. Sunoo's eyes immediately drop down to Sunghoon's arm wrapped around her waist.
A silence covers over the entire room, leaving a heavy tension between Sunoo and Sunghoon.
"My hat..."
Sunghoon eyes lighten up as he sees Sunoo.
"Sunoo! Meet Mila! My girlfriend." Sunghoon pulls Sunoo towards him and makes him offer his hand.
It takes everything in Sunoo to not cry. He shoves the big lump down his throat and puts on a fake smile.
"m-mila! nice to meet y-you," Mila smiles, taking the offer.
Sunoo shakes her hand, clearing his throat after. "Sorry, my throat is kind of sore from... singing..." Sunoo looks at Jungwon and Niki nervously before nodding and grabbing his shoes from beside Sunghoon.
As Sunoo puts his shoes on, he feels a tap on his shoulder.
"Your hat." Sunghoon hands Sunoo his hat.
"Thanks..."
Sunghoon hesitates, debating whether or not to ask the question he's been dreading all day.
Eventually, he musters up the courage to ask.
"Hey, I was wondering if you wanted to go out and get ramen after practice tonight—"
Sunoo stands up straight, quietly letting out an outburst. "I can't! I... need to go to sleep early! Life of idols and whatnot, you get it. Right?!"
Sunoo runs out the dorms and out to the car in the front.
"Okay! Time to go!" Jungwon claps his hands and leads everyone out.
"Sunghoon, you coming?" Niki looks back, waiting. Sunghoon looks at Niki and snaps out of his 'mila gaze' and shakes his head. "You guys go ahead, I'll be there in a bit." Niki sighs quietly before shutting the door behind him.
——
"Sunoo? Are you okay?" Jungwon sits next to Sunoo, patting his shoulder.
"I-I'm fine... are we waiting for Sunghoon?"
"Yeah—" Jungwon starts before getting interrupted.
"Nope." Niki walks onto the car.
"What? What are you talking about?" Jungwon sits up, waiting for Niki's answer.
"He's going with Mila" Niki scoffs sitting in-front of the two.
Jungwon groans.
"Seriously?"
"They'll probably skip practice." Heeseung comments, not looking up from his phone.
Sunoo speaks up, hope glimmering in his eyes. "Sunghoon wouldn't do that."
"He would now..." Jungwon says under his breath, Sunoo just barely catching it.
"We can go now!" Jake announces to the driver.
——
"Sunoo! It's one, two, step, jump! Not one, two, jump!"
Sunoo stumbles over his own foot. "Sorry sir, I'll fix it..."
He starts the part on his own, trying to get lost in the music. As the music goes on, the picture of Sunghoon and Mila gets bigger and bigger in his mind.
"Sunoo, are you okay?" Sunoo jumps back, startled by the voice of the choreographer.
"Sorry I'll w-work on it." Sunoo's eyes drift over to Sunghoon and Mila, being the loudest in the room, giggling, kissing. "Sunoo hyung! Wanna go get some ramen? I'm starving!"
Jungwon looks at Sunoo's gaze and sighs.
This is worse than them not coming.
Sunoo's gaze pans to Niki, who's next to him.
"Sorry Niki but I have to work on this—" Niki grabs Sunoo hand and drags him out the practice room and into the hallway.
"Niki! Let go—"
Niki doesn't say a word until they're out of sight and in the elevator.
That's when Niki finally speaks.
"Are you okay? You needed to get out of there right?"
"Niki, it's not the time— I keep messing up, I'm all over the place, Sunghoon—" Niki pulls Sunoo into a hug, holding him tightly. "I know it hurts hyung..."
"I'm fine Niki... I always am."
Niki shakes his head, pulling away as the elevator dings.
"Let's talk about it while getting ramen? You can say whatever you want! Not too loud though... we're still idols." Sunoo looks at his reflection before walking out.
"Let's go, I can't be seen sulking here..."
——
"Sunoo hyung! Are you coming?! The movie is starting!"
"One sec!" Sunoo stared down at the letters in his hand.
Love letters.
Dozens of them.
Way too many to count.
And all are designated for Sunghoon.
It won't happen...
Damn it...
Sunoo sniffles, reading a handful before wiping his tears and stuffing the letters into a box. He places the box in his closet before covering it up with shoes and other boxes.
"Coming!"