Work Text:
It hurts
But she makes it better, little by little
In all the years I've been reliving, I've stopped feeling that sense of comfort that every human being feels at least once in their life. Now I just feel like I'm a soul trapped in flesh and bones because heaven rejected me; I don't think even the devil wants me with him in hell, that's why I'm not dead yet
The only thing that kept me going was my daughter. I had to look for her, and find shelter in the meantime
I found a house outside the city. A hermit welcomed me as if it were the easiest thing in the world, and I saw myself in his eyes. Not as a reflection, not as a mirror, but as a clone, a copy
Those days recognizable only by the ticking of the clock hands were exhausting, a punishment worse than the torture of still being alive. I think I would have attempted suicide soon, but the thought of leaving my daughter in the hands of FEMA pushed me to live a few more minutes, a few more hours, a few more days
On one of those many days in the hermit's house, my nervousness must have been palpable in the air. Everyone stared at me as if I were crazy, and I don't blame them
The only person who showed me any decency was a woman with a child in tow. Her name was Olga, and she was an extraordinary woman; she herself was looking for her other four children. I immediately felt enormous respect for her and her child, with whom I have interacted maybe a few times
But she... She was out of this world, like me. She told me about how her story with her husband began and how everything went up in smoke in a very short time with the arrival of their first child. I didn't tell her I was immortal, I think she would have thought I was truly crazy, so I just said I missed my daughter and hoped to find her soon. She understood me, and in our grief as parents, we consoled each other
We console each other
I remember she once told me that I seem like a great husband to her. The point is, I've never been married, I don't know where something like this even came from. It just came out of her mouth. I think she also realized the absurdity of what she said, because afterward she ran away to her child in the kitchen
More than making me feel weird, it melted my heart. In a good way, of course
If it were up to me, I'd take her by the hand and lead her away from all this chaos. She's one of the few people I know who doesn't deserve it. I would help her find her children, and together we would find my daughter too. It would be perfect like this, but too unrealistic, no matter how absurd the situation already was
Anyway, it doesn't matter now. The only thing I'm sure of is that I want to protect her, and she wants to protect me. If we're united, nothing can hurt us
Sometimes I think of my daughter, my creature, and I fall into the greatest despair. I remain silent, but my face shows everything. And in her caresses and her embrace I find safety and peace
It hurts
But she makes it better, little by little