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the fan hums overhead, the dimmed lights basking the hotel room in a soft, golden glow. the hustle and bustle of city life continues on beneath the window, but the curtains are drawn shut, and so is mingi. sitting at the head of the bed and staring straight ahead, he's lost in thought, his eyes glazed over and fingers tense where they grip his thighs.
only when the door opens to reveal yunho does mingi break out of his trance. his eyes flick over, body relaxing on the mattress. "hey."
yunho smiles warmly as he enters the door. there are a few bags on his left arm, the keycard in his right as he locks it behind him. "you seem a little stressed today," he offers, beginning to unpack his shopping bags. he glances up at mingi. "you okay?"
mingi chuckles shyly. "y-yeah, i just… i miss my mom is all. it's hard being so far away."
"only another few days and then we're back home. i'd be happy to take you to see her."
the rapper pulls his lips to the side, his eyes trained on the hotel floor beneath him. by now, he should be comfortable with the independence that comes with adulthood. by now, he shouldn't feel so alone without the warmth of his mother. by now, being surrounded by friends he's come to call family shouldn't make him feel so vulnerable. and yet, he's frozen with the same sense of anxiety he's had since his early youth, an instinct he should have long outgrown.
sure, he's far from home, but he wanted this. this life he's worked so hard to perfectly craft is a heavenly dream to others, but comes with its fair share of nightmares for him. his elevated heart rate and shallow breath only prove an overreaction to an environment that should be thrilling, not triggering. but being halfway across the world from the only places he's ever called home…
"hey," yunho grins, his voice deep as he shifts onto mingi's bed. "i have something that might make it a little easier. but you have to swear not to tell anyone."
mingi's eyes dart to him with an uncertain, almost alarmed look. "...what?"
with a sly smirk, yunho withdraws a small black bag from within another larger one and places it between them. then, he sighs briefly, and extends his pinkie. "you have to swear."
silently, and though with a look of distrust and apprehension, mingi encircles his finger with his own. his gaze never leaves yunho's face, neglecting to study the bag in favor of anything he may be able to read. nothing about his expression seems particularly devious, but mingi has learned the hard way that deception is, well, deceptive. that you can't trust anyone.
but yunho is so laid back, so steadfast and safe all these years, so seemingly genuine, that it's hard not to trust him as he reaches inside. "marijuana. well– they call it weed here. or pot."
mingi withdraws immediately. "what? are you serious? hyung, why the hell would you–" his voice drops to a sharp whisper, fearfully aware of hongjoong on the other side of the wall. "why the fuck would you buy drugs? are you trying to get us arrested?"
"mings, it's legal here," he chuckles. "it's up to you. genuinely. you can say no and i'll never bring it up again. but the vendor said this stuff helps with anxiety so i figured you could use a little."
"you didn't even ask me first," he hisses. "what if– what if they find out? what if we get in trouble? oh, god, what if–"
"did you take your meds?"
"huh?" his anxious rambling is cut off by the question. despite wanting to retaliate with defense, taking the question to heart, his eyes dart over to the nightstand. no. he didn't. "i– i, uh…"
"up to you," yunho reminds, "but she said this'll kick in in a good half hour. and it doesn't just calm you down, it makes you happy. i already checked for interactions so you'd be fine." his tone stays gentle, not pressuring, laced with what almost feels like mercy. "come on, mings– don't you want to do something fun?"
mingi is quiet for a moment. silently weighing his options. yunho takes the hesitance as a no, prepared to apologize for pressing and tuck the bag back out of sight, when mingi catches his hand.
"i'll– i'll try it. just– you have to stay with me, okay? just in case something bad happens."
"are you sure?"
"yeah," he sighs. "yeah, i want to. i just… don't want to get in trouble. don't want anything bad to happen."
"you won't," yunho reassures, his eyes as warm as ever. "if you do, i'll take the blame. wholeheartedly. they won't blame you for something i did."
his movements are slow as he withdraws a single chocolate bar, gently pulling away the wrapper. the sight of a familiar sweet, one mingi has a nostalgic preference for, calms his nerves immediately and he finds himself impatient to taste it. his mind races as yunho places a single pip in the palm of his hand, with a quiet, "one piece for now. i don't want you to get sick if your tolerance is low."
"we already know i can't handle my alcohol," mingi chuckles nervously, eyeing the chocolate as if it may suddenly bite him if he looks away. with a slight tremble in his hand, he takes it into his hand, briefly studying the size, the texture. it's bigger and tougher than he's used to. he raises it to his mouth, and the soft substance melts on his tongue in the familiar sweet way chocolate always does. he grimaces at the musky, earthy aftertaste, a slight bitterness tingling in his throat as he swallows.
"not a fan of the taste?" yunho teases, though as he takes a bite for himself, he has the same reaction. "yeah, that's… that's a little gross."
"you seem so calm about it, i thought you've had it before."
"no, i just didn't want you to be scared. i have no idea what i'm doing either, just following advice."
mingi's face falls immediately. "please tell me you at least did research."
"yeah, yeah!" he reassures frantically. "as much as i could, don't worry. i know what to do if we do get sick. and we might get dehydrated so we have to drink a lot of water and relax." he nods off to the side. "i snagged a few water bottles down at the bar."
"i'm trusting you here," mingi jests, though his nervous eyes show a bit of truth to the warning: "don't make me regret it."
to ease the returning anxiety festering in mingi's veins, yunho pulls him closer and clicks on the tv, navigating to a familiar cartoon. between the nostalgia that settles him into a calmer, safer mindset, and the physical touch providing comfort and warmth, he does feel more at ease as he relaxes into yunho's arms. he nearly forgets about the pine notes lingering on the back of his tongue until his body begins to grow heavy, sinking deeper and deeper into the bed, his head lulling against yunho's chest. he inhales deeply, allowing himself to become enveloped by yunho's masculine scent. warm and safe.
a soft giggle tumbles from his lips after some time has passed, his hand closing around the fabric of yunho's shirt. "yunho," he drawls, too mindless to bother with formal speech. "my blood is liquid, i think."
"yes, that's how blood works," yunho laughs. "i'm pretty sure it can't be a solid."
"yeah, but like, i can feel it being liquid. it's moving around and stuff."
"it does tend to do that."
he swivels around to look yunho in the face, and nearly bursts out laughing at his expression. his eyes are bloodshot and heavy, a small smirk on his lips, his head lazily resting against the pillows. "how high are you?"
"like, uh…" yunho's brows furrow in genuine thought, "like… 185 centimeters, i think."
"you're so big."
"you're no dainty thing, either, mings."
mingi falls back, crossing his arms as he snuggles in to get comfortable again. "i like to pretend."
"i know." yunho's hand comes up to gently comb through mingi's hair. "puppy."
he stiffens. "what?"
"you know," yunho chuckles. "one of those big dogs who thinks he's a lap dog." he turns over to look mingi in the eyes. "always following me around everywhere… waiting by the door… you're such a puppy."
"o-oh."
yunho takes note of how tension between them begins to fester. mingi curls himself inward as if to make himself smaller, his eyes occupied elsewhere.
"i like it, you know." he offers. "nice to have a best friend with me everywhere i go. always happy to see me." his voice drops to a mumble. almost embarrassed, and yet lined with something sweet. "such an ego boost from how clingy you are. is that weird to say? like – makes me feel like i'm valued."
mingi's hands curl further around yunho's arm. his grip heavier, his touch warmer. a small smile peeks into the corners of his lips. "it helps to have someone so steady. so it's mutual." his fingers start to dance along the fabric of yunho's sleeve, taking note of all the textures, the way the fabric feels beneath his fingers… "aren't you hot?"
"hm." yunho inhales deeply and pulls himself to a sitting position, beginning to pull the jacket off his body. "guess i am. are you?"
"a little." mingi's eyes have found purchase in yunho's newly exposed skin instead. the way his pale arms look in a loose black tee, especially when paired with those jeans, it stirs something in mingi. skin to skin is always his favorite, and he finds himself slipping off his own jacket as well. yunho takes it off his hands, hanging them both on the door, before returning to his side. this time, when he pulls mingi in, mingi fully envelops him, face buried in his neck and hands buried in his shirt.
"you just said you were hot, baby," yunho teases, though happily accepts the position. his fingers begin to dance through the strands of mingi's hair again. "you don't think i'm hot?"
mingi mumbles something into yunho's skin. yunho hardly processes the words as much as he does the way mingi's hot breath fans against his bare skin. a shudder runs down his spine, his chest stalling as his fingers close. he's certainly pulling on mingi's hair, but the boy's only reaction is gripping back harder. it's as if he needs to touch every inch of skin available or he'll fall apart. he's pressing himself into yunho's body, until eventually, the only thing he can think left to do is slot their legs together. his hip pressing into yunho's pelvis, his knee tucked between his thighs. it's close, it's warm, it's safe, it's electric.
"like a puppy," yunho chuckles to himself.
the boy just lets out a little whine.
"you feeling okay now?"
he whines again. he shifts to the left, on top of yunho now,… and lets out a heavy sigh as his growing bulge presses against yunho's. he'd never realised how big he is. it's impossible to ignore the pressure.
"hey, hey, no," yunho warns gently, slowly shifting mingi back to the right despite his small protests. "you're high, baby. i'm not gonna take advantage of you, alright?"
mingi finally looks up at him. there's a drunken daze in his eyes, an obvious lustful pout among his expression. his cheeks are flushed, his ears cherry red. he's beautiful. and he's silent for a moment.
finally: "sorry." he nearly breathes the words, his gaze falling. his legs still wrapped around yunho's, but only from the side now, he can get a better view of what he touched. with just his eyes, he can see how hard yunho is, the outline of his cock visible through his jeans in a way mingi has never seen before. and admittedly, he has looked quite a few times.
"hey." yunho grabs his face, redirecting him towards his own. "my eyes are up here."
mingi's eyes lock onto his. for a moment, the two are holding a silent staring contest, as if trying to read each other, as if trying to reach into one another's minds. mingi's hand lulls on yunho's chest, and as it slowly drifts downwards, he never looks away. even as his fingers curl around the pelvis of yunho's jeans, slowly starting to palm him through the fabric, the rigid staring continues.
yunho nearly gasps at the touch. his jaw clenches to conceal a reaction, but his eyes waiver, his hand grabs at mingi's wrist. he doesn't push him off. he holds him there. unsure what to do next.
he wants to say yes so badly. he wants to thrust up into mingi's touch, pull him back into his lap, shove his body against his. and yet, he's locked out by his morals, by his precautions. but he's slowly losing the battle. unable to muster the strength to say no, to push mingi off, struggling to keep a poker face.
"mingi…" his voice is lined with a warning. but the lack of sternness doesn't exactly make the warning register for mingi. he knows the difference by now, between yunho genuinely wanting to say no and hinting at wanting to be pressured.
and even if yunho did really say no… mingi's not so sure he could respect that. not when his blood is running as hot as it is.
"need it," he finally vocalises. "you said you would take care of me if something happened." he swallows hard, applying more pressure. "need you to take care of me."
yunho hesitates. he can see the desperation in mingi's eyes. the begging. he reaches up, cradling his cheek in his hand, his gaze firm as he sternly asks, "are you absolutely sure you won't regret it? are you sure i can trust you to make this decision?" his hand wanders to the side of mingi's neck. "you can change your mind. but you can't undo it. i don't want you to deal with that."
there's a slight slur to his words, like it's a challenge to string sentences together. his lips move lazily as he speaks.
"i've wanted you inside me for so long," mingi blurts out, staring at those lazy lips, and yunho is silent. he's in disbelief. his best friend, with whom his relationship has always been so intimate and yet platonic… has been wanting him this whole time. it's been mutual.
"i've wanted to be inside you for so long," yunho finally confesses in return, his voice hardly above a whisper. his breath is held taut in his lungs, his eyes unblinking as he musters out, "there's lube in the white bag. i thought—"
"you thought about it?"
"i fantasised about it, puppy," he murmurs. his gaze drifts down to mingi's lips. "sharing a bed with you for three days… alone… and this trip is all about trying new things, so…" he breathes out, pulling mingi in closer. "i've never kissed a man before. you make me want to. and you make me think i won't want to stop."
mingi can feel his high swirling in his forehead, in his chest, in his pelvis, lifting him too high to care. his blood is coursing, hot and energetic, his skin blossoming with a cherry red blush. his inhibitions out the window, his need for release far too strong. without a verbal response, he pulls yunho in by the neck and crashes their lips together, pressing his hips forward against his thigh.
a shudder runs down his spine, a moan leaks out of his throat. words can't convey how good it feels to be grinding up against yunho, knowing it's only going to get better. he relishes in the feeling of yunho's hands tensely exploring his body, his touch clearly so excited and yet so apprehensive. so impatient, but not wanting to rush him. if only mingi had the same self control.
he pulls himself back into yunho's lap, this time straddling him. he shifts back and forth, searching for friction, for pressure, his eyes nearly rolling back at the way yunho guides his hips downward with every push and pull.
"need you to fuck me," he breathes against yunho's chin. "please."
"i like the manners," yunho teases, "but you have to be patient. we have to get you ready…" his hand trails along mingi's sides, sliding up beneath his shirt. "can't just stuff my cock in you. i'll break you in two."
at that, mingi can't help but moan. the obscene words coming out of yunho's mouth – even if just a few, it gets him going. it's his deep, almost condescending tone. and how much self control he seems to have while mingi is utterly falling apart in his lap.
"you like the thought of that?" yunho coos, reaching his hand between them to untie mingi's drawstrings, slowly beginning to pull his pyjamas off. "want me to manhandle you?"
a whimper escapes mingi's throat as he paws at yunho's sleeve. fingers curling weakly, failing to grip onto the fabric, begging it to come off. his vision is blurry, his hands uncoordinated. yunho chuckles and complies, pulling the shirt off over his head before returning his attention to mingi's clothes. he pushes him onto his back, swapping their positions, and yanks the fabric off his legs, leaving mingi fully exposed.
"i'm not sure why i'm surprised that you don't wear anything underneath," he remarks with a chuckle. "you're huge, mings."
"i'm not that big," mingi breathlessly retorts, but the argument dissipates as yunho wraps both hands around his length. both of his huge hands just hardly cover the tip, and the boy responds, "i don't think i can fit this in my mouth, baby."
"try."
yunho immediately folds at mingi's command. he releases one of his hands, the slight smirk tugging at the corner of his lips wrapping around the head of mingi's cock. the boy shudders, his hands immediately flying to yunho's hair. yunho has to pin his hips down, hard, to stop him from bucking up into his throat. it slides along the roof of his mouth, the girth making it impossible for yunho to pull his teeth away, but mingi seems to love it. the slight scraping along the shaft makes him shudder. he's pulling at yunho's hair, his thighs twitching madly, his toes curling in on themselves. it's a struggle for yunho to hold mingi's legs apart and stop him from choking him out… but it's not like he would mind all that much.
with a pop, he releases, only briefly to say, "grab the lube," before returning to the task at hand. mingi shivers, maneuvering awkwardly to reach behind his head and grab the bag off the floor. his breathing is labored as he tries to desperately to focus. he nearly drops the bottle several times as he finally secures it in his hand, passing it to his partner.
yunho effortlessly breaks the seal and flicks off the cap. he drips a generous portion onto his finger. he pushes mingi's thighs upward with his shoulders, and mingi complies, lifting his knees and exposing himself further. it gives yunho plenty of room to lift mingi's balls with his palm, gently pressing his finger against his rim. as he bobs up and down, he gently massages the ring of muscle as mingi squirms in his grasp.
finally, he pushes his finger inside, only up to the first knuckle, and yet it's enough to elicit a loud groan from mingi's throat.
wordlessly, yunho rubs gentle circles into mingi's thigh with his free hand as his mouth continues to work. he hums, the vibration shooting through mingi's body, and his head is in the clouds already from just foreplay. yunho presses his finger in the rest of the way, and mingi only relaxes further, his muscles twitching around the intrusion, as if trying to pull him in deeper.
exhaling through his nose, yunho puffs his cheeks, relaxing his throat, and takes mingi as deep as he can. it shoves past his uvula, eliciting a slight jolt in his chest, but yunho regulates his breathing and keeps going. he chokes back everything, feeling it slide down his throat, his nose nestling in mingi's pubic hair. he swallows, tongue swirling, as he shoves in a second finger. as his fingers curl forward, it nearly sends mingi over the edge; his back arches off the bed, his jaw falling open with a desperate moan. stars cloud his vision, hands gripping yunho's hair so aggressively he nearly pulls it out.
yunho winces and recoils, mingi's cock falling from his mouth as he coughs and sputters.
"s-sorry," the rapper shudders. "did i hurt you?"
"a little," yunho chuckles, rubbing his scalp. the cheeky smirk returns to his expression. "might've bruised my throat too. the dentist is gonna know." his free hand returns to grip mingi's cock, twisting as it bobs up and down the shaft, slathering a mixture of saliva, pre cum, and lube all over. his fingers never stop working mingi open for a moment. "but i know what i'm getting into. big… needy… pathetic…—"
before yunho can finish, mingi lets out another moan.
"what?" he smirks. "you like being called pathetic?"
"mhm-hm."
he stuffs a third finger in. "and you wanna be manhandled, hm? think you're ready for more?"
"please," mingi blubbers. there are actual tears forming along his lashline. "please, i need it, i need– i–"
"use your words, baby. you have to tell me what you want."
a tear rolls down mingi's cheek. his hands envelop either side of yunho's jaw, forcing eye contact, pulling him closer. he rambles desperately with a thick slur to his words, "i want you to fuck me so hard i can't breathe and want you to make me cum so hard i pass out and i want your cum to still be leaking out of me tomorrow when i'm sore and tired and you have to baby me and–"
"wow." yunho swallows roughly, studying mingi's face for a moment. "you really are pathetic. must have wanted this for a long time, huh?"
with an involuntary pout, mingi nods, reaching lazily for yunho's jeans' button. "ever since high school."
"a decade…?" his disbelief spikes. "you've wanted this for that long?"
"i realized i was gay when i was 16," mingi admits. his fingers fumble with yunho's pants, just barely able to unfasten them but struggling to pull them off. "'cuz of you. you stood over me and made me feel so small. protected me and made me feel so safe. and when i saw you in the locker room after gym… and then in the dorms when we showered together for the first time…"
now it's yunho's turn to blush. his skin heats, turning cherry red, as he nervously sheds his jeans. his hands pause on his boxers, and he looks mingi in the eye as he begins to slowly pull them off as well. "ready to see it again?"
"no," mingi replies curtly, and yunho pauses, until he follows up, "i'm not gonna see it if it's buried inside me. can admire it later. already know i like it."
"so impatient." tears form in mingi's eyes again, and yunho concedes with a demeaning chuckle. "alright, alright." he slathers himself in more lube and presses the head up against mingi's entrance, their gazes locked sternly. "ready?"
mingi doesn't answer. he wraps his legs around yunho's waist, his arms around his back, and pulls him in. it's a struggle to get it in, but mingi doesn't let him stop pushing until he's forced his cock inside him. mingi nearly lets out a visceral scream, and yunho slaps his hand over his mouth.
"shut up," he bites coldly. "scream all you want when i fuck you in the studio. but don't get us caught now."
mingi whimpers pitifully. he gulps audibly, his teeth clenched and a pout tugging at his mouth. his chest is puffed, tiny breaths escaping his nose. "y-yes, sir," he forces out.
"good boy," yunho praises sweetly, before slamming himself all the way in. mingi flinches and lurches forward, disoriented and overwhelmed as black spots and stars dance about his vision. his hands are tense and shaky as he scratches at yunho's back. pain jolts up his spine.
"doing okay?" yunho whispers against his neck. "not too much?"
with another whimper, mingi nods; "so good. m-more."
"good." yunho swings his hips back, pulling out nearly all the way before slamming back in. the head of his cock hits mingi's prostate head on. a violent shudder runs through his body, heat pooling in the pit of his stomach, his entire body feeling so light and fluttery, his senses deafened to all but the overwhelming sensation in his pelvic region. it feels like a tidal wave crashing over him, and his hand flies to his cock to grip it, to hold on, to stop himself from reaching his orgasm too embarrassingly soon.
it doesn't go over yunho's head.
"you're easy, aren't you?"
mingi clings on for dear life. "imagined it s-so many times."
"feels oh, so good to finally have it, hm?"
"mhm-hm." his voice jumps as yunho slams into him again.
"try to hold on all you want," yunho growls against his skin, thrusting between phrases, "but i'm going to fuck every… last drop of cum out of you… whether you like it or not." he grips onto mingi's hips with a dark look in his eyes. "i always imagined i'd take this slowly," he pants, "so much foreplay… so many kisses… so gentle…" a hand comes to cup mingi's face. "i can't control myself around you, mings. … i can't take this slow... i need to fucking ruin you."
the way such obscene language falls from yunho's gritted teeth so effortlessly, it does something to mingi. he tenses, curling in on himself, so desperate to hold on. so desperate to make this last.
"you wanna cum so bad, don't you?"
mingi's face scrunches as he violently shakes his head. not yet. not yet, not this quickly.
"you can't help it," yunho drawls, a condescending tone coating his words like honey. "you're at my mercy. … you do what i want. … you cum when i make you."
his hand wraps around mingi's throat, fingers pressing into his carotids, and it sends him over the edge. mingi's grip tightens further on his cock, but it's not enough to stop the rush. he feels weightless, and yet as if everything's crashing into him at once. it's almost as if his heart stops when the orgasm washes over him. with one last loud gasp, his breath catches and stalls in his chest, his throat burning with a strangled scream that yunho contains with a rough, messy kiss. his skin is burning, ears ringing, vision a blur, fingers streaking blood from yunho's back. it's a dramatic, theatrical display, but he's never felt so utterly euphoric before. his torso is covered in sweat and cum and his head is spinning and disoriented.
"hyung," he whines against his lips. "f-fuck."
"you tell me when you can't take it anymore," yunho offers sweetly, just for his tone to return to darkness: "otherwise… i won't stop until i've filled you up."
"use me," mingi begs in compliance, unravelling to sobs. he's shuddering, his body jolting from the painful overstimulation as yunho doesn't slow down for a moment. "use me like a toy, fuck me–"
"i don't need permission to," yunho grins. he lifts mingi's hips off the bed, driving his cock straight into his prostate over and over like a wild animal, revelling in the pain and overwhelm strewn about mingi's face. that alone is enough to drive yunho crazy. mingi falling apart on him, completely at his mercy, begging to be ravaged and abused like a toy. like his toy. "you're all mine," he vocalises.
he could hold back – his stamina is impressive – but he simply doesn't want to. he doesn't want to take the risk of mingi tapping out and him having to cum somewhere else. he's dead set on filling him up. dead set on burying himself up to the hilt, forcing mingi to take all of it, just to watch it start to drool out as he pulls away. dead set on leaving evidence of what he's done to him.
he grips mingi around the throat, pinning his head to the mattress, and with a few more aggressive thrusts, his orgasm catches up to him too. deep moans escape his throat as he relieves himself deep inside of mingi, ribbons of cum painting his insides in strong bursts. each thrust is more aggressive than the last, pulling out slowly just to slam in again at full force. and mingi is reduced to tears, to whimpers, to sobs and gibberish pleading. thank you is the only thing yunho can parse.
"fucking hell, mings," he pants, but just before he can collect himself, his ears perk up to the sound of the hotel door clicking. his eyes dart to the entryway, which is just as empty as he'd left it earlier. whoever had seen that… no telling how long they'd been watching, but it was certain they'd seen the main event.
"mhm?" mingi lets out a little sound of inquiry, and yunho's still trembling hand comes to caress his cheek.
"mhm… nothing."
mingi's eyes slowly part, struggling to focus on yunho's face. "you're okay?"
"never better." he smiles warmly and pulls mingi close. "i've never felt so good in my life. i could die with no regrets."
a lazy smile accompanies slow blinking from mingi's expression. "well, y'can't, cuz we're doing this again."
"in the studio, so you can scream as loud as you want to."
"i want to."
yunho pulls away, his cock falling away from mingi's hole. mingi shudders violently as another moan escapes his throat.
"shh, you're okay," he coos. "i've got you."
he hums. "clean me up?"
"of course, baby."