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‘I shouldn’t be hiding…. It’ll just make him angrier.’ He thought to himself as he fought the call of sleep, he didn’t want to rest until he knew ‘he’ wasn’t coming tonight. He shuddered to think what would happen to him if he did, ‘he’ would not appreciate finding him underneath the bed asleep.
Hiding under the bed. It sounded childish, was childish, but ‘he’d’ look everywhere except there, it was something not expected of him. He shifted slightly, the cold floor starting to make him shudder and digging into his hips. Cautiously he checked his watch (Omni-tools had been banned after a hacking incident), it was nearly midnight. ‘He’ always came around midnight, usually on the dot, due to ’his’ military training.
That was all he knew of course. ‘He’ came at midnight but the day…. It was always random, no pattern.. Maybe that was to stop him from devising a strategy, prevent him from trying to stop the torment and the endless nightmare. He waited, dreading every silent tick of the clock, as the hands crept towards midnight.
Just he predicted, the door to his room slid open and he could hear the heavy footsteps as ‘he’ entered the room. Every thud causing his heart to skip a beat and freeze. He saw the two large feet appear in front of the bed, armoured and two toes on each foot. There was an angry flanging snarl from above him as the Turian realised that he was nowhere to be seen. The feet moved to check the bathroom and wardrobe, then proceeding to slam the doors shut. By then his heart was hammering away, effectively thunder in his ears.
The Turian was angry, really angry, constantly snarling as he checked all the places where he could possibly be hiding, all the places the Turian expected to find him. Then he heard the door to his room swoosh open and the Turian storm out in fury.
He has to clamp a hand over his mouth to stop the disbelieving laugh coming out. He couldn’t believe it. It actually worked… He knew he’d pay later, knew that next time would hurt more and be more torturous but… but it was worth it. Just managing to get one up on the bastard. Something that would help keep him going just a bit longer. He waits one more minute to make sure the Turian won’t come back, then allows himself to breathe proberly, tempted to crawl out and curl up in his bed. Yet he was still worried the Turian would come back. It’d be painful sleeping on the floor but he wanted to be safe.
He wanted just to go home or for the Turians to go home.
He should have known the universe doesn’t give you what you want.
The door opens once more and his eyes widen as all too familiar footsteps come towards the bed. Then three fingers closed around his ankle and he is yanked out from what he thought was sanctuary. His hands scrabbled for some purchase in the flooring but there was none.
He twists, aiming his other foot at the Turian’s face, but is easily captured by the Turian. Releasing his ankle, the Turian grabs him by the front of his shirt and punches him, dazing him long enough for the Turian to flip him onto his front and pin an arm behind his back. Using his free hand, the Turian yanks down his pants.
He struggles, enen though he knows it will get him into more hot water, attempting to get free. The Turian presses him into the floor, lining himself up before snarling into his ear.
“Nice try, you nearly threw me off. Perhaps you need more encouragement to behave.” His arm is twisted into an unbearable angle and he lets out a yelp of pain. “ If you pull a stunt like this again, then your little crush will have an ‘accident‘. I’m sure everyone would miss sweet, little, Rahna.”
Reluctantly he ceases his struggles, he doesn’t want any harm to come to the others, especially not Rahna. Vynnrus mockingly purrs down his ear. “ Good boy. Perhaps your kind will be able to learn how to obey orders and to respect their betters, Alenko.” Kaidan attempts to shut off his senses as the inevitable happens…
He awoke with a jolt, managing to stop himself from head butting the door of his sleeper pod. Hurriedly he opened up his pod and forced himself to calmly exit his pod, knowing some of the crew would be in the mess eating. Kaidan made himself breathe normally, pulled on his boots and headed to the toilets, avoiding the other members of the crew.
Soon as he was in and confirmed he was alone in the room, he dropped the composed act and hurried to the sink. He steadied himself on it and took deep breaths, trying to calm himself, trying to get his calm mask in place.
Kaidan forced himself to look in the mirror, at his reflection. For a moment he sees something else. A scared teenager, eyes puffy from crying and a bruise forming on his left cheek. A teenager who was barely keeping it together.
‘No…. I’m not that anymore’. He forces that thought though and begins to correct the reflection. He was a Staff Lieutenant of the Alliance Navy. The Marine detail commander of the SSV Normandy SR1. A man who fought alongside the first human spectre, Commander Shepard.
Not that scared teenager, not anymore. No longer was he a messed up kid. He wasn’t.
Yet like all the other times, whenever the nightmares came back to plague him, a snide little voice, a snide Turian voice, from the back of his mind spoke up, spouting seeds of doubt and yet again Kaidan mentally threw the voice against the wall, snapping it’s neck and silencing it for now.
He was not a scared teenager. He wasn’t…