Chapter Text
When Isak arrives at the party with his boys the place is already spilling with teenagers with beers in their hands and music so loud that the house seems to vibrate from it. If he’s honest Isak wants to turn right around and head back home where three-day-old sweats and his bed are waiting for him. But as he looks over at his friends, takes in Mahdi happy smile, the way Magnus is already bobbing his head to the music like a fool and the expectant look on Jonas face as he side-eyes Isak, he tries to clear his bored expression and replace with a passing impression of someone ready to have a good time.
He knows he’s not completely successful when Jonas rolls his eyes at him, more indulgent than exasperated. Isak returns the gesture, it’s no surprise that Jonas sees right through him. His friend sees more than Isak wants to show most of the time. Still, he drops his shoulders as he tries to relax and enjoy himself for the sake of his friends. He knows that a big part of coming to this party tonight is on his behalf, his friend’s way of trying to lift his spirits. For weeks now there have been whispers and glances thrown his way, rumors that all start and end with one word. Gay.
Ever since Eva’s party where he had made the mistake of flirting with a first year only to turn her down when she had tried to give him head, gossip had been nipping at his heels like a hungry dog. He looks at his friends again as they scope out the scene and feels a rush of gratitude for them, after weeks of feeling the pressure of the rumors, he had confessed in private the validity to the rumors, sure that he was about to lose his friends, instead Mahdi had shrugged nonchalantly, Jonas had offered his support and his ear for whenever Isak wanted to talk and finally Magnus had offered to go to gay bars to help him score. One joke about Magnus not being able to get girls, so how was he going to help Isak get guys and what little uncertainty and uneasiness had dissipated like air.
Isak follows his boys as the make their way over to a table with red cups, taking a sip of something Mahdi offers him, he winces but still swallows it. Shit beer, but free beer nonetheless. “Whose party is this away?” he shouts over some loud annoying pop song playing.
“Some guy from Bakka,” Mahdi answers since he had been the one to tell them about the party in the first place. “We get our shit from the same dude and we bonded, told me to come and party.”
“Bonding with a fellow pothead,” Jonas jokes. “That’s nice.”
Mahdi shrugs. “It’s a loving plant my boy.”
Isak huffs out a small laugh at that but tunes out his friends as they joke and poke fun, instead he looks around the house and the faces in the crowd, none of them familiar for once.
“Relax,” Magnus breaks through his thoughts. “Most of these kids are either from Bakka or use to go to Bakka, not Nissen, no one here know you or that you’re gay.”
Isak stares at his friend, watches as Mahdi slaps him across the head.
“They don’t know,” his friend starts as he glares at Magnus. “But if you start shouting it like that they will.”
Magnus' eyes widen at that, his annoyed expression at being hit replaced with remorse as he looks over at Isak. “Sorry, man.”
Isak tries to work up some annoyance but in the end, it fizzles before it can even start, knowing his friend doesn’t always think before he speaks but is harmless in the end. “Go make a fool of yourself somewhere else Magnus,” Isak says the smile on his face taking the sting from the words as he points at a group of girls dancing together a few feet away from them. “Go dance.”
Magnus scoffs in offense but then flashes a sunny boyish smile and does exactly that, Mahdi following him while Jonas hangs back watching him.
“He didn’t mean anything by it,” Jonas states.
Isak nods in agreement. “I know, he’s Magnus, he doesn’t have a malicious bone in his body, he just has a bad case foot-in-mouth syndrome.”
“A closet full of shoes,” Jonas jokes as he looks over at Magnus and Mahdi. Mahdi is already dancing with a pretty redhead while Magnus is trying to chat to a girl with pink in her hair and a shirt that says ‘down with the patriarchy’ who is looking at him like she’s second away from smashing him under her shoe.
“Looks like he’s about to do it again,” Isak comments with a smirk. “Go save him from himself.”
Jonas looks away from Magnus and the girl whose face is starting to remind him of a thundercloud to look over at him, concerned. “You sure?”
“Yeah,” Isak nods quickly. “Pretty sure Magnus doesn’t know what patriarchy even means, go smooth that over before he earns himself a slap, I’ll mingle.”
“Yeah,” Jonas says dryly even as he starts to walk away. “That’s what you’ll do.”
Isak raises his cup in mock cheer, laughing when Jonas just gives him another look before walking away. He downs his beer and reaches for another if he’s actually going to enjoy himself more alcohol is going to be needed. He’s raising the cup to his lips when he spots a familiar and dreaded face in the crowd. Tall, short pixie hair and a pretty face if he was into females.
“Shit,” he mumbles into his cup as he takes in Emma Larzen across the room by the doorway with the group of first years she’s always with, he watches her scan the room and he ducks behind an archway leading into the kitchen before she can spot him. Emma was a complication and he gets that he brought that complication into his life when he had flirted with her at Eva’s party but he didn’t think that by flirting with her on the instincts of being closeted that he had somehow signed some kind of obligation contract to her.
He knows Emma and her friends are the ones that have been the ones spreading rumors about him and since then Emma has been functioning under two modes, either believing he was gay and that, that was the reason he didn’t want her or seeking him out to try and prove the rumors wrong by getting him to hook up with her. In her mind, he was either a fag or she was going to be the girl to make him straight. It was aggravating and a big part of him wanted to put her in her place, but the rest of him just wanted to avoid her and the situation until it went away. He knew that mentality came from years of hiding away who he really is and as much as he wants to he himself and say fuck whoever has a problem with it, deep inside it was easier said than done.
He peeks around the wall letting out a breath when he sees that Emma and her friends are headed for the living room away from him.
“What are you hiding from the cops?”
Isak jumps at the voice, embarrassed by the small squeak-like sound that escapes his lips. Turning around he finds a tall blond boy in slim beige pants and a jean jacket over a maroon hoodie leaning against a counter giving him a half amused, half concerned look as he sips his beer. “You owe people money and they’ve come to collect?”
Isak stares dumbfounded, vaguely he notices that the beer has left a shine on the boy’s lips, that thought followed by how nice and soft-looking those lips appeared to be, he flushes, feeling hot at the random thought.
“Worse,” Isak clears his throat as he answers when the boy gives him an expectant rise of his eyebrows. “A determined 1st year who isn’t taking no for an answer.”
The boy smirks at that and his whole person radiating laughter. “You heartbreaker, you.”
“Yeah,” Isak says his tone as dry as the Sahara. “That’s me, regular Casanova, women just throw their panties at me wherever I go.”
The boy laughs loudly and Isak can’t help but smile at it, the guy’s attractive face even prettier from it. “That sound unsanitary and bothersome.”
“Yeah…” Isak trails off, not knowing what else to say, now that he’s noticed how good-looking the guy is, his stomach feels like it’s in knots. Emma forgotten for the moment, he searches for a way to keep the conversation going.
He watches as the boy pulls a joint he has behind his ear and shows it to Isak before pointing at a door that leads to an outside patio. “Well she’s in there,” the boy starts to head for the door. “So, I doubt you’ll run into her outside, join me?”
The boy doesn’t wait for an answer, instead, he just opens the door and walks out, Isak waits for a moment before he too heads for the door, closing it behind him. He finds the boy sitting down on steps that lead to a large yard already lighting up, Isak follows his lead and sits down next to him, the space small and Isak is acutely aware that their sides are pressed together. He watches out of the corner of his eye as the blond take a pull of the joint, holding it in for a moment before he releases a puff of smoke.
“So, what’s your name?” he’s asked as he gets handed the joint.
“Isak,” he replies before taking a hit himself.
“Even.”
Isak nods, his lips sealed to hold in the smoke, only when he feels his lungs start to burn does he release it. He notices Even giving him a slight smile and he returns it feeling awkward.
“So, the girl?” Even asks as takes back the joint.
Isak sighs at the question, suddenly tired. “She won’t give up,” he says, his annoyance coming through. “Even though it’s obvious I avoid her, if she sees me here she will try to glue herself to my side or throw snide remarks my way. She feels like I owe her something because we kissed a little at a party, fuck, it’s not like I slept with her and didn’t call her in the morning, I even stopped her when she was going to, um,” Isak trails off, feeling himself blush and looks over to see Even who is smirking.
“She tried to give you head,” Even concludes, chuckling when Isak nods. “And you turned her down, probably bruised her ego with that move.”
Isak groans as he leans back, his elbows resting on a higher step behind them. “I get that and I’m sorry if I embarrassed her or made her feel bad then, but can she get over it? The only reason people even know about that is because she babbled it to her friends, I didn’t say anything.”
Even shrugs. “She sounds immature, I wouldn’t pay her any mind.”
“I kind of have to since everyone at school has been talking about me and her and what my reasons for not hooking up with her might be,” Isak reveals after another hit of the joint, the effect relaxing him and loosening his tongue.
“Where do you go?” Even asks.
“Nissen, 2nd year,” Isak answers handing back the joint. “You?”
“Bakka, 3rd year,” Even replies as he looks at him, a speculative look on his face. “Do people at school think you didn’t hook up with her cause you’re gay?”
“Oh god,” Isak moans mortified, his head dropping back and he can feel his skin burn even in the chill of the night. “Have the rumors spread so much that people from other schools know now?”
Isak has his eyes closed, hating everything and wondering why the ground doesn’t open and swallow him when he feels Even’s hand drop gently on his knee the action surprising for a stranger, forcing him to sit back up and look at the boy.
“Hey,” Even says his expression serious but understanding. “I don’t know about any rumors, I just know how people’s minds work, I didn’t mean to imply you’re gay, not that it’s wrong or bad if you are, I’m bisexual myself.”
Isak stares at the boy in awe at how easy it is for him to say that, no hesitation, no shame or worry. Isak desperately wants to be the same, to just say it and be free.
“I am,” Isak confesses quietly shooting Even a hesitant look only to find the boy giving him a reassuring look back. “My three best friends are the only ones that know, well them, and my roommate. But he says he always knew because he’s gay himself and his gaydar is flawless. And now you.”
Even smiles at that.
“I just told a complete stranger I’m gay,” Isak marvels, saying it more to himself than Even.
“And the sky didn’t crash down,” Even teases lightly, nudging Isak’s shoulder with his until Isak gives him a small smile. “And what do you mean stranger? I helped you hide from the scary 1st year, we’ve shared some weed and you just told me your deep dark secret, I feel like we should be exchanging friendship bracelets, I want mine in blue, by the way.”
“Green,” Isak shots back jokingly, more at ease.
“Like your pretty eyes,” Even flirts, grinning when Isak shoves his shoulder, his cheeks pink. “Though that pretty rosy color on your cheeks looks good on you too.”
“It’s because it’s cold out here!” Isak argues still blushing but smiling at the easy playful banter between them.
Even nods in mocking agreement as he flicks the now finished joint still between his fingers. “Let’s head back inside, it is a bit too cold to stay out here.”
Isak hesitates, looking back at the house and then at Even who is now standing.
“Hey, I’ll keep you safe for her shit,” Even reassures as he holds out a hand and Isak believes him and he can read on Even’s face that he means more than just Emma, more than her nasty gossiping.
He places his hand in Even’s and lets him pull him up, smiling down when instead of letting go, Even intertwines their fingers. They walk back into the house and Isak follows him, clinging to his hand, feeling comforted by Even taking the lead like he’s Isak’s own personal shield. Even stops for a moment at a small closet door, he lets go of Isak’s hand to remove his jacket and placing it in on a hook, taking Isak’s once he’s done the same.
“You know this house well,” Isak comments.
“It’s my buddy Mikael’s place, we grew up together,” Even tells him as he takes his hand again. “This is like a second home.”
“He goes to Bakka?” Isak asks to be polite.
Even shakes his head as they head into the living room where the party is at its loudest. “He graduated last year, he’s around here somewhere, just look for a floppy-hair fool with a video camera, he records everything, in fact, he’s hosting this party for the sole purpose to record the masses.”
Isak makes a distracted sound of understanding as he looks around, there seem to be more people now than before and he tries to find his friends in the crowd but finds none, instead because his luck is absolute shit, his eyes find Emma’s from where she stands in a corner with her friends and a couple of guys he recognizes from Nissen. So much for no one from their school coming to this party like Magnus had reassured.
“That her?” Even questions as he follows Isak’s gaze to find a girl staring at them, her lips pursed when her gaze travels down to their hands. “She’s cute,” Even says dryly.
“Great, why don’t you go over there and tell her, maybe it will distract her from me,” Isak says sarcastically, embarrassed when he hears his snotty tone, rolling his eyes to hid it when Even’s gaze leaves Emma in favor for him, a small smile playing on his lips and a raised eyebrow in quiet amusement.
He looks down at his shoes disgruntled when Even turns to face him, blocking Emma from looking at him.
“I would if I could,” Even says, his voice colored with mirth but also something tender as he places a finger under Isak’s chin, lifting his gaze. “But my type is more blonds with grumpy faces, not brunettes.”
Isak stares at Even at a loss for words, the so far friendly flirting between them changing, now charged with intent.
“Dance with me,” Even whispers as a new song starts this one with more base, slower, sultrier than the lively stuff that has been playing for a while. Even must find a ‘yes’ in Isak’s expression because he starts to guide him to the makeshift dance floor, pulling him close and intimate as his hands hold on to Isak’s hips. Isak rests his hands on Even’s biceps, his finger digging into the hoodie, holding on for dear life when Even pulls him even closer until there isn’t any space between their bodies.
After that Isak forgets everything, he forgets that they are at a party, that his friends are somewhere possibly watching, that Emma is absolutely watching and that this is just more ammunition for her. All there is at the moment is Even. Even’s hands on him steady and comforting while also inciting. Even eyes, so blue and solely focused on him, studying him, categorizing everything about him like he’s something fascinating.
“Breathe, Isak,” Even whispers as his hand runs up Isak’s back to his neck giving it a reassuring squeeze, Isak does as he asks, his own hands pulling Even towards him even more and he lets out a breath when Even follows, his head pressed against Isak’s, their noses bumping softly as they share the same air. “Keep breathing, baby, keep breathing and be you, screw her and anyone who has a problem with you.”
Isak shivers at the endearment, loving the way it sounds coming from Even’s lips,
“You’re amazing Isak,” Even says softly, continuing when Isak shakes his head. “You are and you’re beautiful, brave, breath-taking and, fuck, I want to kiss you so badly.”
Isak nods eagerly not even bothering to be embarrassed by it because Even gives him a bright smile at his eagerness.
“Fuck, you’re cute,” Even says tenderly before closing the gap between their lips, giving him a soft closed-lip kiss, pulling back to gauge Isak’s reaction. “So very cute.”
“Kiss me again,” Isak whispers needy, moaning softly when Even does as he asks, this kiss less chaste as he opens his mouth. Isak leans his body heavily against Even’s as their kisses turn longer, dirtier with more tongue.
“I think she’ll get the message now,” Even says between the kisses, letting out a moan of his own when Isak nips at his bottom lip.
“Who the fuck cares what she thinks right now,” Isak pants, his eyes half-closed, lost in the sensation of Even’s mouth on his, his body moving with his as they sway together. “I don’t care about anything but continuing this.”
“Shit,” Even murmurs and Isak can see on his face how he’s trying to regain some sense of control. “Want to get out of here?”
“Yes,” Isak hisses out. “If we don’t this is going to get X-rated really quick.”
Even chuckles as he presses a kiss against his brow.
“Come home with me?” Isak asks some uncertainty seeping into his voice.
Even touches his face, presses another kiss, soft and tender in his touch and expression. “I’ll follow you wherever you want to go, lead the way.”
Isak smiles, disentangling from Even but grabbing his hand the same way Even had done before, he blushes when Even raises their hands to press a kiss on the back of his. As they start to leave Isak locks eyes with Emma once more, her expression unhappy and mean, but for once Isak isn’t worried or even annoyed, instead he flashes her a smile, not smug or challenging, just a smile to show how happy and at ease he is. She can take it any way she wants or not, she was no longer Isak’s problem.
“That’s one hell of a way to come out,” he tells Even as they leave, returning the amused grin Even gives him. “Thanks for the assist.”
“Anytime.”