Chapter Text
Penelope stood there in shock, unmoving. Her pulse was loud in her ears as everyone behind her muttered about what to do. But not Colin. He was looking down at her, just as surprised, but waiting for her response, one in which did not come immediately. Mrs. Wilson looked at the younger girl with a tad of concern as Penelope seemed to not even blink as she stared at her.
Images popped through Penelope’s mind just then. She saw the church in her mind, the one she was to marry Debling in, the one that caused her sudden panic. Right there in the Bridgerton drawing room, she relived the moment as she dropped her bouquet of flowers, ripped off her veil, and rode away with Colin in her wedding gown. She would be lying if she said she did not think about how Debling would feel but was grateful that she did not see the dejection that must have crossed his features once he realized she left him at the altar. And now he was here. Not in her family home. He was here, at Bridgerton House, the home belonging to the family of the very man she more or so left him for. She knew she would have to face Debling eventually, someday. She just did not expect it to be this day…at the exact moment she returned back to Mayfair.
Finally, Colin murmured her name, just low enough for her to hear. His tone, full of inquisition, disbelief and worry for her state of idle, jolted her back into reality. Penelope turned her eyes away from the housekeeper and looked up at Colin, her voice a timid “How did he know we are here? D-do you think he saw us arrive?”
“I am not sure but that is explicitly why I had us dropped off in the back, so that very thing would not happen,” Colin stated, more irritated than anxious.
“I am highly certain the Lord in question does not know you are here, miss,” Mrs. Wilson stated softly to Penelope, “He arrived asking for the Viscount or Dowager inquiring about any update on your and Mr. Bridgerton’s whereabouts.”
Anthony immediately took a step forward, just behind Penelope’s shoulder, talking directly down to her, “I will send him away with no word.”
“Though I appreciate your protection towards Penelope and your brother, dearest, I do not think it wise to lie,” Violet added, “After all, he is not an unkind man. I am sure he is only worried.”
“He is kind,” Eloise remarked, with a roll of the eyes, “But I am also highly certain he is not worried for Penelope’s well-being. He knows she has feelings for Colin, though lord knows why. He is probably only thinking of his social status.”
“Or this being a delay in his travel abroad,” Colin quipped back, exaggerating under his breath.
“Stop it,” Penelope snapped, which hushed them all immediately, “Lord Debling is a kind man. Even though he is slightly aware of my feelings for Colin, I do not think that knowledge diminishes his concern for me. And, he does not care about his social status,” she said to Eloise, then turned to Colin, “And his next exposition is not for another few months,” she turned to look at Anthony, “Your mother is right. We should not lie.”
“Why do we not let him know that you have returned, and that you are well, but you will see him on your own time,” Kate mediated with a soft smile.
“That is kind of you to suggest, Viscountess, but that is only avoiding the inevitable.”
Colin spoke up gently, “Then what shall we do?”
“I need to see him.”
“Pen – “
“If I am to face him anywhere, I would rather it be here, where I feel most comfortable.”
“You have our full support,” Benedict said.
“Shall I accompany you or keep close as you speak to him,” Colin asked, “I will do whatever it is you wish.”
“I would like for you to speak to him first.”
“What?”
Penelope glanced at the family behind them before she took his arm and pulled him a little away for privacy, “I need to know his reception first. I am very anxious. It would help me to know before facing him.”
“Do you not think that his reaction to me will differ from his reaction to you?”
“I think if he is angry, his expression will be the same with both of us.”
“Sure, but he would not strike you.”
“He will not strike you either.”
“You have not known the man long enough to see his true colors.”
“I know him well enough.”
Colin nodded, “Fine. I will speak to him then and report back.”
“Please do not be disrespectful.” Off Colin’s look, she concluded, “For all intent and purposes, he did nothing wrong.”
“If he becomes disrespectful or harsh towards me, I make no promises, Penelope. I am not a man to just lie back and take it.”
Penelope’s sly smile creeped up with a sinister look in her eye at the sexual innuendo and it immediately lightened Colin to where he chuckled, “I have created a monster.”
“Oh, I think that part of me has always been in there. It was just you that released her,” she flirted back.
“I will speak to him and I promise, at first initiation, I will be kind,” he said before leaning down to give her a quick peck on the lips and walked away.
When Colin got to the landing between the stairs, he stopped walking. Lord Debling was standing there in the foyer, hands clasped behind his back stoically, as he observed a large painting of Aubrey Hall on the wall. Colin’s first initial instinct seeing the man was not good. He felt rage strike up his spine for two reasons: one was ire, because of Debling putting the ultimatum on Penelope to no longer see him once they married and two was jealousy, because Debling nearly did marry her.
However, as quickly as the anger struck, reality of the present struck even quicker. If Debling had not put that ultimatum on her, she quite possibly would have never run away. That would leave Colin with a strictly platonic friendship with her or he would have become a secret affair. Neither felt fitting to his heart. The fact alone that she would still have been titled Lady Debling made none of that worth it. And though Penelope did choose a union with Debling first, it was a choice made for contentment and out of obligation. But then, she ran away. She begged him to help her run away. She revealed her true feelings to him. She gave her heart and her body to him. She accepted a proposal from him, this time for a marriage filled with excitement, passion, trust and love. Contentment, sure, but not in the boredom that she would have lived at Debling Estate where she would be alone. In the end, she chose all of this with him, not Debling.
And so, with a refreshed confidence and steady footing that only a distinguished man could grace, Colin continued down the stairs. He had nearly made it to the bottom when Debling turned his head his way. He watched as the man did a surprised double take on him, his clasped hands falling to his sides. As Colin walked towards him, there was no visible sign of any anger across the other man’s features. There was just only merely shock. When Colin stood 4 feet in front of him, Debling’s eyes flicked away from Colin’s, looking over his shoulder then nonchalantly side-to-side, as if searching for someone. And he knew exactly whom that someone was.
“She is not here,” Colin stated. When he saw Debling suddenly tense up with concern, which surprised Colin but confirmed Penelope’s previous words, Colin reiterated, “In the immediate area around us, I mean.”
“So, she is in the vicinity,” Debling asked.
“She is.”
Colin could see that Debling tried to hide his exhale of relief, but it was not well achieved.
“Have you two been here all this time?”
“No. We only just returned not an hour ago. You have impeccable timing it seems.”
“Unfortunately, your timing is not Mr. Bridgerton,” Debling stated back, but his tone was merely from fact from yesterday’s events, not out of hostility.
“It is all in the matter of perspective, I would say. You see it as misfortunate, I see it differently.”
“How would you describe it then, Sir?”
“Diving Timing.” Debling looked down, a small smile just barely there showing, which prompted Colin to continue, “I did not arrive there with an ambush in mind, nor even a plan, but I would be lying if I said time was not on my side.”
“How does Miss Featherington see it?”
“That…” Colin hesitated, “That will be up to her to answer.”
Debling nodded, as if respecting that answer, “I understand.” For a moment both men stood there a tad awkwardly until Debling went on, “She does not need to fear me. I assume it is why she did not accompany you currently, yes?”
“It is inevitable for anyone to be hesitant in this particular situation.”
“Of course, but if you please relay to her that I hold no ill will. While I consider myself a patient man, out of respect, I also deserve a conversation in person.”
Penelope’s voice came out of nowhere, “Yes, you do.”
Both men, startled, turned to look behind Colin where Penelope stood at the bottom of the stairs. As Penelope made her way towards them, her eyes remained confidently glued on Lord Debling, but her steps were unassertive. Colin did not like how direct their eye contact was as they all stood amongst one another again, but he also knew she would not have joined them if she were not ready.
“You deserve an explanation, directly from me.”
Lord Debling gave her an appreciative nod as his eyes immediately reflected visible dejection. Penelope turned to look up at Colin, “I would like to speak to Lord Debling alone, if I may.”
Colin took a step-in front of her, shielding Debling from her view, to give them just a second of privacy. It was definitely considered a rude manner, but he did so on instinct. He lowered his voice, “Are you certain?”
“Yes,” she whispered back, with a reassuring smile.
“I will be just there, in the foyer den.”
Colin started walking away, but he stopped to look back at them with a second glance, before retreating into a nearby room. When Penelope looked back at Debling, she caught him eyeing her lower-scale maiden’s outfit with curiosity. She had also never been in his presence with her hair fully untamed and suddenly felt a little bare.
“Please forgive my attire. While I was away, I did not have anything to wear besides—” she paused, suddenly very self-conscious as she rung her hands.
“I understand. I can imagine how acutely uncomfortable it would be to wear a gown of that opulence for more than a ceremony.”
Though it was an actual fact of the cumbersome gown, also ill-fitting to her features, Penelope immediately recognized Debling used that excuse to cover the awkwardness of the real reason she discarded it.
“Yes.”
“I am surprised to see you. When I arrived here, I came seeking any updates on your whereabouts. It relieves me to see that you are…well?”
“I am well.” Penelope hesitated once again but pushed herself to get on with it, “My Lord, I am sorry for the events that took place yesterday. Or…in which did not take place. I cannot imagine the embarrassment that much have caused you.”
“I do not care about what others think, Penelope. You should know that by now.”
“Well, yes, I suppose I do, but in this situation, I still must give you my sincere apologies. I do not need or ask for an acceptance of my apology, but just a resolution of giving one. I should have gone to you myself, to speak in private, but I fear my panic and adrenaline got the better of me.”
“Your mother thinks Mr. Bridgerton kidnapped you.”
Penelope’s eyes widened before she snickered in a bit of disbelief then and awareness at it was so very much like Lady Featherington to think that.
“I informed her that you most-certainly left by your own free will. She is very much for the dramatics, your mother.”
“Yes, she does tend to become a little over-dramat—” Pen paused, her eyebrows narrowing as she observed him, “Wait. You know that it was fully my doing?”
“Yes.”
“Even though Colin-Mr. Bridgerton-was there?”
“I could see it in you long before Mr. Bridgerton showed up outside the church, Penelope. Anytime someone even mentioned a Bridgerton, I saw a confliction in you. You would perk up but the light would leave you at the same time. In all honesty, I was waiting for you to end our engagement.”
“W-why did you not say anything?”
“Because I said all I had to say regarding that situation, one that we agreed upon. It had to be your choice. On our wedding day, I assumed that you had made peace with a new life and I was delighted to finally have a lovely, responsible woman with my name and at my estate. Obviously, my assumptions were incorrect, however – “
“I had made peace with that life,” Penelope quickly interrupted, “Or I thought I had…up until I was in front of the church. I understand every bride can experience hesitation but this was life-altering fear that I felt. It was not because of you. I mean, you were involved, but you did nothing wrong. And it was not entirely my feelings for Colin that prompted my change of heart.”
“What was it?”
“A few things. I did not want to lose my relationship with the Bridgerton’s, who have been like a family to me since I was a child. And I realized I did not want to become trapped in a marriage of convenience just because it was what was expected of me. I know that every young lady grows up being groomed to be a wife, to make her husband happy and live in content. And I know you promised me your commitment and delighted in me having my own interests, and I have been nothing but grateful because you have been nothing but kind and patient with me. But, my interests for the type of marriage you expect go far beyond what is appropriate. Colin showed up at the church, as my friend, to ask me if this was what I really wanted. And I made the decision, then and there, that it wasn’t. I demanded Colin to take me away from there. I was acting spontaneously out of fear for having to face you and my family. He is also to blame because he complied with my wishes, but he did not plan nor construct my exit.”
Debling listened with full, careful attention and took in everything she said. A long moment after she finished speaking, he replied, “The last thing I would ever wish to place on you is a life of feeling trapped, Penelope. One of the motives for our alliance was because of you being trapped in your family home.”
“That is the irony,” she giggled, nervously.
“You addressed Mr. Bridgerton as your friend, when he showed up yesterday…is he still your friend?” Pen lowered her eyes, blinking anxiously, and did not immediately answer. “Penelope,” Debling gently urged.
She looked back up and nodded ‘no’, “I mean, he is still my friend, yes. He always will be, but…he is now my…” regaining courage, she lifted her chin proudly, “He is my fiancé.”
Debling gave her a small smile, “I must admit, I did wonder if your claims about Mr. Bridgerton never having feelings for you were incorrect after his sudden appearance.”
Penelope’s cheeks blushed, “I did not know of his feelings for me until many hours after I fled when we had a chance to really talk. When we realized our feelings were reciprocated, we acted from our hearts and decided that we want to get married. We-we have only just told his family.”
“You do not need to be nervous with me. We both know this is what you have wanted. It my have once been a silly yearning, but it has come true. You do not need to feel guilty about that. I did have some hope that it was just cold feet, because out of all the women in the ton, you were the most interesting…and unique…a sure thing,” Penelope smiled, flattered, and he continued, “And I have come to care for your wellbeing. That means, I wish for you to be happy. And if your happiness is with the Bridgerton’s, then I will gracefully step back.”
Penelope’s eyes teared up from the sheer graciousness, “You are much too kind.”
“I do not wish to keep you rooted if your interests wish to fly, Miss Featherington. I am thankful that you ended up having this conversation with me. Honest communication is the key to any healthy relationship. Please remember that, won’t you?”
“Yes, and if that is the case, may I honestly ask for a favor?”
Debling suddenly looked very curious.
At Featherington House, Penelope and Debling walked into the drawing room side-by-side in silence. They were met with the back of Lady Featherington who stood at the window. Penelope looked at Debling for reassurance and he gave her an encouraging nod of reassurance.
Penelope spoke in a tone where she expected to be ridiculed, “Mama.”
They both saw Portia’s body react, flinching, before she gasped and turned around. Penelope’s heart dropped when she saw her mother’s face tear-stained from previous hours and currently wet from new ones. Without saying anything, Portia hastily moved her way until she took her in a relieved embrace. Penelope was in shock as she embraced her mother back. Thought she was the child, and much shorter in stature, she felt for a moment she was the one being maternal as she held her mother. Debling took a step to the side, letting the women respectfully have their moment.
When Portia pulled back, fresh tears were falling, but now one’s of happiness as a smile graced her lips. Portia momentarily ignored the used handkerchief in her hand as she placed her palms gently on the sides of her daughter’s face, examining her. What also shocked Penelope was her mother seemed to not even notice her current state of dress.
“My girl, Oh, you have come back.”
“Mama—”
“No, just…just tell me you are alright.”
“I am alright. I promise. But-“
“Lord Debling,” Portia said surprised, now noticing his presence.
“Lady Featherington. Good day.”
“Good day. I…I am quite surprised to see you. You both arrived here together?”
“Yes, but I asked him to accompany me here today,” Penelope said, moving to stand next to Debling again.
“Does that mean you are both on well terms?”
Penelope and Debling both looked at one another. It was Lord Debling who answered, “We are, but not in the way you are assuming, madam.”
Portia’s eyes darted back to Penelope, not with anger, but inquisitiveness.
“I asked Lord Debling here with me to possibly help you understand.”
Much to Penelope’s conundrum, Portia spoke earnestly, “I understand a lot now.”
Penelope looked at Debling, “Would you excuse us a moment?”
“Of course.”
With that, Debling left, shutting the doors behind him. Penelope ushered her mother to sit, which they both did.
“What do you understand, Mama?”
“That Mr. Bridgerton was not involved in your disappearance and that I am really the one to blame for your running off in the first place.”
Penelope licked her lips, “Mama, Colin was involved in me leaving, but he did not kidnap me as you had first assumed.”
“It was silly of me to think so. I supposed I was acting upon the shock of the events.”
“Overreacting.”
“Fine. Overreacting.”
“I told Colin to take me away. He did not suggest it. The only thing he did was make sure I was not making a mistake by marrying Lord Debling. When I realized I was, he did help me because he saw me in distress. He would never have just left me.”
“Then he is a good friend.”
Penelope observed her mother strangely. This was the complete opposite to what she thought she would be walking into, just as she had assumed after telling Colin she was Whistledown or just previous, when facing Debling. For a moment, she even considered whether her mother was inebriated. But, she has seen her mother a little loopy after one too many glasses of wine or flutes of champagne during holiday parties. This was not it.
“Forgive me, Mama, but, you are not angry?”
“I was. Very. But when your daughter disappears, worry excels any ire. And worry leads you to think about things and thinking leads to realizations. And I realize now, as I said, I am the reason you disappeared.”
“But you are not.”
“Penelope, please. You do not need to pretend just because you see me with tears,” she sniffed, dabbing her face with her hanky, “I know I am in the wrong. You just stated this marriage was not what you wanted yet I was the one that kept pushing. I saw you getting anxious yesterday. Did I ask you if this was what you wanted? No. I basically told you to stiffen your upper lip and push through the feelings.”
Penelope sighed and smiled, “Alright, you did do that, so I will give you that one. But, I can assure you, that up until that moment, I thought I did want that marriage. It was not some arrangement you forced on me. *I* first chose it, for the wrong reasons it turns out. But then *I* chose to leave it. And Lord Debling respects my decision and we have decided to remain amicable acquaintances. And as for Colin…you said he is a good friend to me. He is. He always has been. But, he is more than that. While we were away, we realized we both love one another, true love, and we have decided to get married.”
Portia’s eyes widened but she did not speak. Penelope knew she had just delivered a bombshell but she had to just rip the bandage off.
“To you, it was just a fancy on the neighbor boy. But for me, it was real love. I did not know Colin would end up feeling the same way but it turns out he does. And vice versa. We both used the circumstance of yesterday to reveal our hearts. Lord Debling knows this as well and respects it and he wishes us well. I hope you can, too.”
“Where is he? Mr. Bridgerton?”
“He…” Penelope looked nervous, “He is in the hallway.” Without a word, Portia got up and stomped over to the doors. Penelope quickly got up in horror, “Mama.”
The doors flew open and Colin, who had been standing there listening, quickly jolted back in surprise and embarrassment. Lord Debling was no where to be seen as Portia beamed, taking Colin’s cheeks in her hands.
“My son-in-law.”
Colin, completely aghast, looked at Penelope who looked happily surprised. Portia then turned to look back at her daughter with excitement.
“My daughter a Bridgerton. One cannot be prouder than that. We must make sure Lady Whistledown hears of the news. And we must…” Portia paused, her smile turning into a grotesque frown, “Penelope Anne, what are you wearing?”
As if finally being able to rest, Penelope chuckled and plopped down onto the seat with overwhelming happy relief.
Epilogue: Four Weeks Later…
"Oh, it is such a beautiful day!"
It was, in fact, the most beautiful days to ever happen to Mayfair as long as Penelope could remember.
There was not a cloud in the sky, which was almost a never occurrence rarity for London, and the sun was bright, but not too bright. The temperature was just perfect with a very small breeze making the air fill with the aroma of jasmine and honeysuckle.
As Penelope fully stepped out of the carriage and onto the pebble stones in front of the grand cathedral of Mayfair, Eloise appeared to help her straighten the train of her Delacroix gown. Portia stepped forward to help adjust her veil.
“There. You look so lovely.”
“Here you are,” El stated, handing Penelope her tussie-mussie bouquet, a flower arrangement of pale blue’s and yellows.
As the three ladies head up the steps towards the church doors, Penelope glanced up at the current dormant bells hanging under the steeple. She could not believe just a month ago, she had stared up at another churches set of bells, with such dread at the knowledge that they would soon be ringing to let the entire town know she was a wife. But now, now she could not wait for them to chime, to alert anyone who would hear them, that she was Mrs. Colin Bridgerton.
And when the church doors opened, Penelope did not pay attention to the hundred pair of eyes staring at her from each sides of the aisle. She focused on Colin staring at her from the very end. She was so excited she could have run to him in that moment it was allowed. And that is when Penelope knew, duty be damned, Colin Bridgerton was the only one she would ever let claim her.