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English
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Femslash Exchange 2017
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Published:
2017-10-08
Completed:
2017-10-08
Words:
1,360
Chapters:
5/5
Comments:
25
Kudos:
94
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11
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1,388

i carry anger, i carry sadness

Chapter 5: now the sun is up and i'm going blind

Chapter Text

They don't get a happy ending.

Johanna doesn't speak to her for a week after hearing her apology, and when she finally does, it's to corner her in her compartment, say "Take off your clothes," drive her crazy with need, and refuse to acknowledge her presence for another week.

They return to District 7 after the war. They fight over whether to return to Johanna's house in the Victor's Village or to Inès's old house near the forest. They fight over whether or not Johanna was right to vote for another Hunger Games. They break more than half their collection of crockery, fighting. They'd probably find a way to fight over sliced bread, if they could.

They don't know how not to be angry at each other anymore.

But the thing is, they don't know how not to be in love, either.

Inès watches as Johanna chops more firewood than they'd need to weather five winters. Johanna watches as Inès carves some leftover chunks of ordinary wood into art. Johanna lets Inès hold her hand and doesn't complain at the long hours Inès spends tracing her callouses, because it never hurts. Inès lets Johanna kiss her and doesn't complain at the teeth sinking into her neck, because they never draw blood. Inès teaches Johanna to enjoy the rain again, because there's only so long you can refuse to shower before it becomes irritating. Johanna teaches Inès how to grieve, because there's only so long you can spend seeing the person you love as a monument to someone they didn't kill.

They don't get a happy ending. But they get a future together.

It's more than they thought they could have. And somehow, it's enough.

Notes:

Soundtrack:
Walls Could Talk - Halsey
Various Storms and Saints - Florence + the Machine
Deep End - A/T/O/S
Lie - Halsey
Delilah - Florence + the Machine

Story and chapters titled using lyrics from the above songs.

For whatever it's worth, Inès's last name is Favrette.