81hood



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  1. Public Bookmark 82

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    Summary

    Lando huffs in spite of himself. “Basically I got him like, this 8-pack of candy-flavored lip balm. And he’s been terrorizing me with it ever since.”

    “And by terrorizing you mean …”

    “Yes. Kissing. Guessing the flavors. Rating them. An Excel spreadsheet.” Lando hits his head on the wall with each point. “The works.”

    OR,
    Lando's the one who talks Oscar into getting the 8-pack of candy-flavored Chapstick, but Oscar's the one who's making it entirely his problem.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    12,808
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    48
    Kudos:
    506
    Bookmarks:
    82
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    4,913

    02 Jun 2026

  2. Public Bookmark 92

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    The first photo is professionally shot— OP81 in a black fireproof undershirt, half out of his race suit, looking off-camera, effectively showing off his chiselled jawline. His eyes are a perfect chocolate-y brown and his hair does a little swoopy swoop thing that makes Lando’s heart skip a tiny beat.
    Lando stops talking.
    The silence lasts just a fraction too long.
    “Oh, fuck off.”
    Chat explodes.
    smooth_opewation55: THERE IT IS
    angeldoesgaf: HE FOLDED 😭
    kukuruchutensei: BRO GOT HUMBLED
    m1xtyex: LOOK AT HIM STARING
    aflairforthez: zoom in again we weren’t done

    Or; Lando gets a hate comment in one of his streams, he decides to check the insta of his so called hater, who unfortunately for him is a certain gorgeous australian f1 driver.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,931
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    20
    Kudos:
    768
    Bookmarks:
    92
    Hits:
    3,479

    31 May 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    “Jesus Christ,” Lando whispered. “I just told Max Verstappen to fuck off. On camera. In a wedding skirt. To protect my—” He froze, gesturing helplessly at the Aussie still watching him with infuriating calm. “—my husband.”

    Oscar raised a single eyebrow. He looked about as hungover as Lando felt, but there was a wry tilt to his mouth.

    “Well,” he said flatly. “At least you were committed.”

     

    Alternatively:
    Lando Norris went to Vegas to celebrate taking the lead in the WDC. He left with a hangover, a husband, and a skirt.
    It's not a PR nightmare if you never sober up.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    75,928
    Chapters:
    14/14
    Comments:
    297
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    1,717
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    443
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    40,457

    27 May 2026

  4. Public Bookmark 22

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    Lando Norris goes into a flower shop intending to buy one plant and prove to his mother he can keep something alive.

    Instead, he meets florist Oscar Piastri, develops a catastrophic crush, drowns a pothos within forty-eight hours, and somehow ends up fake dating the prettiest man alive.

    Oscar thinks Lando is exhausting.

    Lando thinks Oscar is the love of his life.

    Contrary to the title, Fernando survives against all odds.

    -----ALTERNATIVELY ------

    Lando’s a botanical serial killer and Oscar’s the plant medic trying to undo the damage.
    Unfortunately, they fall stupidly in love.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,373
    Chapters:
    5/5
    Comments:
    22
    Kudos:
    213
    Bookmarks:
    22
    Hits:
    1,852

    26 May 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane rolls his eyes and spits onto the ice. “Gonna play a clean game, Rozanov?”

    Ilya laughs. “Unless you give me reason not to, Hollander.”

    “That’s pretty weak.”

    “Just like your backhand.”

    “Oh fuck off.”

    Ilya shakes his head, tutting. “Not good enough, Hollander, sorry. Want to try again?”

    Shane huffs. “Don’t have time, gonna be busy kicking your ass.”

    Ilya glances at the warm up timer, realizing belatedly that they actually only have a few more minutes. “Alright, fine. I will be expecting better during the game!”

    “Expect whatever you want, Rozanov.” Shane pauses. “Except for winning. You’re not getting that.”

    “Ooh, good one! Keep ‘em coming!”

    -

    In which Shane and Ilya are mic'd up during a Voyagers v Centaurs game. They get into a chirp-off. That's is.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,398
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    379
    Kudos:
    8,408
    Bookmarks:
    875
    Hits:
    45,154

    25 May 2026