Skulluva



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    "Let me get this straight. You want Kaveh, a man known for being about as subtle as a stampede of sumpter beasts -"

    "Hey! Come on! I'm right here, you know!"

    "--to act as your spy? For the good of the nation?" Alhaitham snorted. "Kaveh can't even remember his keys, Cyno. And you're expecting him to engage in advanced statecraft?"

    "Ok, rude."

    When a certain ginger-haired Snezhnayan buys a slice of barren desert property in Sumeru, it's up to Kaveh to figure out whether this strange foreigner is actually the Eleventh Fatui Harbinger, and more importantly, what he's plotting out there in the middle of no man's land. Kaveh can do this. Probably.

    But it would sure be a lot easier if Alhaitham hadn't invited himself along as the world's most distracting fake husband.

    Chapter 9: The Ultimate Question Answered!, Chapter 10: What are Men to Rocks and Mountains?, Chapter 11: Perfectly Imperfect (posted!)

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    02 Feb 2025

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    “I wouldn’t say ‘friends,’ exactly.” was Kaveh’s usual answer when asked of his relationship with the current Acting Grand Sage, Alhaitham. In fact, he had no idea how to define their relationship―they weren’t friends, they were hardly colleagues, and he’d be damned if he let anyone find out he stayed in that man's house.

    As their strenuous relationship begins shifting from bickering roommates to something more intimate, that very relationship becomes all the more ill-defined...

    I.e. Kaveh is a terrible drunk and Alhaitham sucks at communication.

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    02 Feb 2025

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    A letter comes to a house in Sumeru City.

    My light,

    I have been absent from you too long. For that, I have no apology worthy enough for the forgiveness I ask of you now. I am ill.

    ...

    Kaveh's mother gets sick. This serves as a catalyst in many respects.

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    16 Jan 2025

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    “Why does it not–” Kaveh’s voice ripped out in a whine. “Have you not thought about it at all since then?”

    A long pause. The longest one yet. “Who says I haven’t?”

    Lightning flashed through the window, illuminating Al-Haitham’s face. Half of it was still wrapped in shadow, blocked by Kaveh’s head, but he could see the distance between them measured, laid flat by the light. The lightning went. The room went dark. But the memory of Al-Haitham’s wide eyes did not leave him.

    What did he want?

    “Have you?” asked Kaveh.

    “Have you?” Al-Haitham’s voice was so quiet, buried under the murmur of the rain.

    Kaveh swallowed. “I mean…I thought that was obvious.”

    Kaveh accidentally sleeps with Al-Haitham. And then...keeps sleeping with him.

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    13 Jan 2025

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    Before his 30th birthday, Kaveh is given an ultimatum: either find a mate within a month or be arranged with some alpha from Fontaine. Left with no other choice, he resorts to his last option- getting into a fake relationship with the most handsome alpha he can find.

    ...Who also happens to be Alhaitham, the most insufferable person he knows, and now, his new "mate".

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    11 Jan 2025