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"Oh God," says Damien. "Yikes. Did the National Enquirer just out you?"
"Out me? Out me for what?" Deborah demands. She hasn't done anything truly scandalous or cancel-worthy in months, at least not in public. Ava can be such a buzzkill. And who the hell reads the Enquirer anymore?
Damien, already braced for impact, shows her the headline screaming across his phone screen.
DEOBRAH VANCE FINALLY COMES OUT! A COMPLETE TIMELINE OF HER RELATIONSHIP WITH SAUCY YOUNG WRITER AVA DANIELS
Oh. Someone is going to pay for this.
(Or: Deborah spirals. Ava is far too calm. Everybody else feels a migraine coming on.)
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Damn You, Deborah Vance by lears_daughter
Fandoms: The Devil Wears Prada (2006), Hacks (TV 2021)
20 Jun 2025
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Miranda and Andrea’s secret relationship is going just fine, thank you very much—until Deborah Vance has the audacity to come out on live television and ruin everything.
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"That’s fucking hilarious. Getting drive thru married in fucking Florida? We should totally do it. Fuck you, Vegas! We make our bad decisions in Key West, baby!”
Ava and Deborah get married on a whim while they're on the road, because a)it's the perfect joke and b) there is no line!
(They're also pretty drunk, but that's neither here nor there in the grand scheme of things)
title from leonard cohen's "anthem" because to me, everything is part of a bit
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“Okay. Fuck,” Ava puts her head in her hands. “Give it to me straight, doc. What’s gonna happen to me?”
“You’ll just get really high and wanna fuck. I mean, I’ve only ever done one of these at a time. Maybe it’s different when you do ten.” He claps a hand on her shoulder as he moves to leave. “Good luck.”
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Or: Ava accidentally takes one-too-many edibles at the frat party. Deborah has an idea on how to take the edge off. (Takes place during 3x08, “Yes, And”)Bookmarked by TSuga
31 May 2026
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Deborah hasn't been able to get the idea out of her mind ever since it popped up, completely unbidden, from what she has to imagine is some dark corner of her subconsciousness. "Leave my pillow princess alone!"
...Okay, maybe not completely unbidden.
After she got home from their little trip to Montecito and had a chance to google a few things, Deborah was good and annoyed at first - and then the self doubt crept in. What if Ava's little joke rang a note of truth?
