poems_and_potatoes



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Hazy: Happy birthday, Roz!

    Bood: Happy birthday, Cap!

    Barrett: Happy birthday!!

    Dykstra: It’s your birthday!

    Haas: Happy birthday, Captain! You are the most wonderful hockey player and leader, and I hope today is your best birthday yet ❤️

    Ilya: Well, it’s not, so your wishes mean nothing.

    Bood: Okay. Well.
    Bood: Looks like we are feeling a bit dramatic today.

    Hazy: Do you want to expand, or how can we best support you?

    Ilya: I will expand even though it is incredibly painful to do so.

    Barrett: Oh, goody.

    Ilya: My husband.
    Ilya: Shane Hollander.
    Ilya: The supposed love of my life.
    Ilya: The holder of my heart and half of my assets.
    Ilya: The future father of my children and feeder of my dog.
    Ilya: Forgot my birthday.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,988
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    203
    Kudos:
    3,975
    Bookmarks:
    327
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    16,486

    15 Jun 2026

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  2. Public Bookmark 81

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    “And next up we have a one-on-one evening with the one and only Shane Hollander.” Hayden gestures towards him like he’s bringing out a car on a game show. “Spend an evening with Shane Hollander, my best friend and the greatest hockey player of the generation. Not to mention lifelong Ottawa sweetheart.”

    “I’m going to kill you.” he whispers through his teeth as the crowd applauds, but also in the crowd, Ilya is glaring like he’s going to absolutely murder Hayden.

    (or - hayden puts an evening with shane up for auction and ilya could not be less thrilled about it)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,548
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    26
    Kudos:
    652
    Bookmarks:
    82
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    5,886

    14 Jun 2026

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  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Ilya grins, a slow, filthy unraveling of lust spilling across his face. “Moya shlyukha, I would not be able to keep my hands off of you,” he rasps, palming his dick, grinning at the faint squelch, the wet drag of his fingers. Shane bucks into his hand, his jaw dropping open, slack with need. Ilya's whole heart aches as he watches his husband sink into pleasure, hitching whimpers escaping from his throat. “You would be the star of the room, no? Every eye would be on you, thorns in their heart for all they cannot have.”

    “You do,” Shane reminds him, as if it's needed, as if Ilya cannot feel it in each clench of his thighs, each wandering drag of his fingers, in the way his hips roll across Ilya's, involuntary, strangled whines rising from his mouth. “You always have.”

    OR: Sometimes, simply being married to Shane isn't enough. Sometimes, Ilya wants him in ways he can't explain; caught and collared and safe beneath his hand.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,858
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    112
    Kudos:
    1,443
    Bookmarks:
    439
    Hits:
    29,921

    11 Mar 2026

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  4. Public Bookmark *

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    In preparation for their second team game of Never Have I Ever with Ilya Rozanov, newly married with his husband in attendance, the Ottawa Centaurs prepared a curated list of kinks in advance.

    Little do they know there’s a dark horse among them.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,621
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    195
    Kudos:
    7,995
    Bookmarks:
    986
    Hits:
    50,341

    10 Jun 2026

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  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Forester (Admirals🔛🔝)
    So the true way to combat the Bisexual Russian Terminator isn’t with homophobia...
    It's actually with even more gay
    ...
    You're a goddamn genius.

    ----

    The NHL rookies have joined forces to strategize now that two of the greatest hockey players of all time are on the same team and Ilya Rozanov must suffer from the unintended consequences of making hockey more woke.

    Mainly, the way everyone keeps implying that they want to fuck his husband.

    or: a group of rookies unionize and employ chirping as a form of psychological torture against a one Ilya Grigoryevich Rozanov.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,151
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    895
    Kudos:
    15,710
    Bookmarks:
    2,979
    Hits:
    89,081

    09 Jun 2026

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