robinami



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  1. Public Bookmark 5

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    Summary

    Underneath the single yellow streetlamp, Avery pauses. Looking up, he sees that the top of the pole stretches out to illuminate the road, and he steps out without checking for traffic, thinking of nothing but standing in the light. He hears only the whistle of the cars in the distance. If he just stays here, it won’t even take 12 hours. Eventually, something very, very bad will come.

    For once in Avery's life, everything went right. Derek lived through the impossible events of New Year's Eve and is now safe in his apartment, and has been for the past two weeks. It's an incredible stroke of luck.

    But every action has an equal and opposite reaction, and Avery is waiting for the other shoe to drop.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,386
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    12
    Kudos:
    52
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    201

    23 Jun 2026

  2. Public Bookmark 17

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    Summary

    Now that it was New Year’s Eve, Derek’s family had driven about an hour and a half to Avery’s house to celebrate their annual New Year’s Eve celebration, where both families would come together at Avery’s house.

    Both of their parents would chat outside the yard, while their little siblings sat in the living room playing Overcooked. It was this same routine they’ve had when the tradition was established about 6 years ago.

    Avery had invited Derek to play chess upstairs in his room. And for some reason, they had ended up cuddling on the bedroom floor.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,116
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    9
    Kudos:
    277
    Bookmarks:
    17
    Hits:
    2,086

    21 Jun 2026

  3. Public Bookmark 7

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    Summary

    PART 1
    Avery turns his face to see that Derek is smiling at him, blinking slowly like the street cat that his mom always used to feed. It’s a sign that they love you, she’d said. Avery knows that Derek loves him – with so much devotion that it scares him sometimes. But nonetheless, he loves him. It’s a very lovely thing.

    Or - the reasons why Avery will always rush headfirst into something bigger than him, even if he's scared. Even if he doesn't understand what he's getting into.

    PART 2
    He holds Avery’s face, kisses his hands, shakes his shoulders.

    “What have you done to him?” He feels his face twitching with anger. Between words, his teeth clench.

    Hastur, you bastard. Where are you? What have you done?

    Or - the reasons why Derek will always rush headfirst towards Avery.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,864
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    63
    Kudos:
    80
    Bookmarks:
    7
    Hits:
    655

    20 Jun 2026

  4. Public Bookmark 5

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    Summary

    After preventing Avery from attempting to save his life by becoming Hastur's vessel, Derek cannot untangle himself from the violent web of self-hatred. Nor can he blame the thoughts in his mind wholly on Hastur.

    Derek doesn’t want to be here or anywhere. He wants to not exist, and if he cannot do so, then he wants to be in so much pain that he finds some clarity in justifying his pathetic life. He wants Avery to be so angry at him that he leaves him behind forever and insists upon forging a life worth living for himself, where Derek is neither a memory nor a bad feeling. He wants to be alone until he dies.

    Instead, Avery takes his silence as an invitation to lie next to him.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,868
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    36
    Kudos:
    125
    Bookmarks:
    5
    Hits:
    506

    06 Jun 2026

  5. Public Bookmark 8

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    Summary

    Avery and Derek finally make it outside for a date, during which they find themselves discussing the topic of New Year's Eve for the first time.

    Derek now turns to Avery. “Except you. When I’m around you, it’s different. You’re my focus point. The great overwhelming–” he gestures out with his hands “–everything hits you like you’re the point of intersection where the whole universe overlaps. You’re a single image. You’re an immutable fact. You provoke no debate or uncertainty. You’re like gravity. If I didn’t have you here I’d fall off the world.”

    He brings his hand to Avery’s cheek, looking him directly in the eyes. His gaze is so soft and the night is so perfectly dark that Avery must have fallen into some beautiful void, where nothing exists but the certainty of Derek and how much Avery loves him. He feels his face melt like butter as admiration and adoration intermingle. Derek is the best thing this universe has ever created. Avery doesn’t need infinite knowledge to know that.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,613
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    26
    Kudos:
    126
    Bookmarks:
    8
    Hits:
    740

    31 May 2026