Chapter Text
Karkat ignores you. He’s at the door directly across from you, and you both live in the cheapest singles in the farthest corner of the building, and you have maybe spoken five words between him.
The guy keeps to himself. It’s fine.
He’s an attractive troll, you know that much. You also know enough about trolls to know he has an abnormal blood color, but that’s not something that bothers you.
Nothing about him bothers you, really. He’s quite nice to look at, objectively speaking.
You can admit when a guy is hot and it’s not gay, that’s just… normal appreciation.
Today you’d both arrived back home at the same time and walked down the long hall together. You watched him walk in front while you waddled behind him with your single bag of groceries.
And now you’re both at your own doors, spending a longer than normal amount of time staring at each other. You can’t determine how old he is, or if he goes to the local college. You absentmindedly lick your upper lip before speaking but he beats you to it.
“Uh, can I help you?” He gazes at you warily with one hand on the door knob.
You stupidly keep watching him. Why are you so shit at talking to people? He’s your neighbor, you seem close enough in age. If you were a normal person you would have hung out by now, done some sick flips on one of your video game consoles over beer or some other platonic male friend-mating ritual.
That was weird, erase that thought.
“No,” you say, which is the stupidest possible response you could have ever come up with.
“Uhhhh okay then.” He turns back to his door and pushes it open, leaving you staring at his door and with no new friend options.
Because that was absolutely the only thing you were interested in.
You step into your own apartment and berate your lack of social skills. Though maybe part of it is just trolls. You’ve never had the problem yourself but you know how easily it is to get pulled into their quadrant shenanigans that you stay far the fuck away from and won’t touch with ten foot pole.
Maybe it’s for the best you two don’t hang out.
—-
You don’t see Karkat again for maybe a whole two months. And then the inexplicable happens. One day you’re getting back home as he’s just leaving. He steps out of his apartment and closes the door behind him, locking it. He turns around and pauses when he sees you gaping at him.
Since the last time you saw him, he’s grown almost two feet in every direction. His chest is broad, leading down to a slim waist. Fuck if he didn’t have some magic golden ratio shit going on. He might be the hottest being you’ve ever seen. He’s wearing a baggy shirt, but it does little to obscure the thick bands of muscles under plated chitin.
His eyes bore into you, a captivating blood red, and stark against skin that has turned an inviting dark grey.
All you do is stare back at him with your mouth hanging open.
“Can I fucking help you?” He snaps, and the triple octave drop of his voice shocks you into movement. Holy shit it’s so deep, deeper than your voice will ever be, and it sends your insides squirming.
“Nah dude we good,” you say and scramble to open your door. You drop your keys idiotically and lean down to pick them up. You laugh nervously and jam them into the keyhole, looking nervously over your shoulder at your neighbor, who is still standing there watching you.
You finally bust into your own apartment and collapse onto a counter with your head in your hands.
You see, you’re not gay.
Well, you weren’t gay.
Not until you saw your troll neighbor after his adult molt.
Suddenly you were gay and a xenophile.
—
Your sex drive goes from zero to sixty. You never bagged yourself for one to have a sexual awakening, yet here you are.
It’s sickening, how you lay awake at night and think about him. You imagine him holding you down, letting his bulge work its way into you. Or him kissing you deeply as you ride him.
You want it all so badly it hurts, like an ache inside that can’t be assuaged.
You’d never really had these thoughts before but now they’re here and so intense you can barely stand it. You’re not exactly the lustful type, and it’s catching you off guard. Well… you were never much of anything.
Rose would certainly love to get her grubby meathooks into this set of revelations.
You get hard just passing his door, which you do everyday, mutiple times so it’s kind of problematic.
You wonder if he’s ever thought about you.
And then once you start, you can’t stop even a little— you’ve heard breaths of it before on the internet, how trolls can give the best orgasms because of how the bulge works.
Soon the curiosity is maddening. You need to know what it feels like.
So you do something ridiculous- you set out to buy the reddest bulge dildo you can find.
The employee at the store is human, which makes sense, you can’t even imagine the whole different rodeo a troll sex store would be.
You browse the store and realize stupidly that they don’t have Karkat’s blood color.
Your entire body flushes red when you also realize that was something you wanted.
You slip out of the store and end up buying a custom made one online, and have it express shipped. You need to test this soon because you’ll spontaneously combust from sexual curiosity if you don’t.
The troll dildo is ordered with some appropriate lube because you aren’t that much of a sexually repressed idiot.
And then you wait. (And masturbate a lot in the meantime).
You race home when you get the notification that the package has been delivered. You check your mailbox, your door, and are bewildered to realize it wasn’t delivered. You didn’t make an account with the website, and assume that your package was stolen.
For some reason it makes you panic because of the slim to none chance Karkat might find out about it.
Your worst fears are confirmed a couple of hours later when someone knocks on your door. You stand up from your perch on the couch and open the door to see Karkat towering over you and sheepishly holding a box.
Understanding pounds through you when you realize the box is open.
“I think you uh, put the wrong apartment number on your package.” His voice is deep and alluring. You find yourself leaning towards him despite the visceral panic in your veins. He avoids your gaze as he speaks. “I’m not an asshole who opens other people’s mail I promise, I’m just an idiot who doesn’t check the address label before opening it.” He reaches up to scratch the back of his head with a manicured claw you immediately imagine raking down your skin.
Karkat’s eyes meet yours and he pushes the box toward you. With shaking hands, you reach out to take it from him. His dark red eyes are boring into yours and you swallow thickly as you struggle for a response.
“Sorry.”
You are such an idiot.
He lets the box go and leans away from your doorway. He puts a foot behind him as if he’s going to turn and enter his apartment.
But instead he looks at you once more. “I like the color,” he says softly, and as the words register in your brain he’s disappearing into his apartment.
With adrenaline filling your entire body you rest the box on the table and open it again to the candy red custom made dildo you ordered, and realize one thing: Karkat, your sexy adult troll mutant neighbor, knows you bought a practical replica of his tentacle dick.