Actions

Work Header

Another Boyfriend

Summary:

Harley takes a detour after school to buy some flowers for his boyfriend.
Only, he didn't expect for Spider-Man to think that they were dating.

Notes:

Day One of Parkner Week, here we go!!
Includes: Road Work Ahead (unquoted), Identity Porn

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

“Here you go, young man.” The older man handed Harley the bundle of purple and white flowers, tied together in a nice bow. “Have a good time with your girlfriend tonight.”

“Boyfriend, actually,” Harley said, readying himself for some type of comment as he slid over his card.

The man took it, swiping in the register. “Everyone loves flowers of some kind. I’m sure he’ll love ‘em.” He handed Harley back the card, and Harley tucked it in his wallet. “Have a good time with your boyfriend, then.”

“Thanks, sir. Will do.” Harley gave him a wave as he exited the shop, turning down the street. He ended up having to make a detour to the Tower since there was apparently road work ahead, but he didn’t mind. It was a nice day that Harley hoped would turn into an even nicer night. Surprising Peter with flowers, they were going to dinner at a nice restaurant that Pepper had recommended to him, and then they were either going to see a movie or end up in the backseat of Harley’s car. Harley didn’t have much of a preference, as long as they hung out alone for once. Peter always seemed busy, for one reason or another, but now they had both made sure their schedules were clear for tonight, so they were finally going out on another date, one where Harley could call Peter his boyfriend without Tony breathing down his neck. 

Harley turned the corner down another street, flowers swinging at his side. The Tower was gleaming in the sunlight above him when suddenly a face masked in red popped upside-down in front of his vision. White lenses widened and twitched to look down at the flowers in Harley’s hand.

“Aw, are those for me?”

Now, Harley has heard of Spider-Man, Tony’s protege of sorts. He has never actually met him face to face. The one time Harley had asked, two months after he moved to New York and two weeks after he started dating Peter Parker, he hadn’t gotten an answer and had just been laughed out of the lab. But he knew what Spider-Man looked like, he knew that Peter help work on his suit sometimes, he had just never met the guy.

Until now. And he really wasn’t making the best first impression, assuming weird things like this.

Harley narrowed his eyes, taking a wary step away from the masked man. “Why would they be for you?”

Spider-Man tilted his head, and when Harley looked up he could see that he was hanging from a web attached to the streetlight above them. “I mean… why wouldn’t they be?”

Harley’s nose wrinkled. “Because these are for my boyfriend, not for you.”

He could see the barest trace of a frown underneath Spider-Man’s tight mask, though it looked strange upside-down. A soft, disappointed noise left his mouth, a noise bordering on the edge of familiarity, but Harley couldn’t quite place it and it unsettled him. So he pushed past him, ducking underneath the dangling man. He stalked off toward the Tower to get changed before meeting up with Peter, determined to wipe all memory of that self-assured vigilante from his mind for a little while.

A few hours later, flowers hidden behind his back with one hand, Harley stepped off the elevator and turned the corner to knock on the apartment he knew Peter and his Aunt May lived at. It took a few minutes, but after knocking once more, the door finally opened.

“Why are you here?” May asked, blocking the way in.

“What?” Harley had always considered Peter’s aunt a really kind and funny person, but the fiery look in her eyes now held neither of those feelings. “I… I have a date tonight. With Peter? Did he not tell you?”

“Oh, he told me.” May crossed her arms. “He also told me that you canceled tonight to go out with a different boyfriend.”

Harley shook his head, eyes wide and disbelieving at what he was hearing. “What the hell? I haven’t even seen Peter since lunch today. I honestly don’t know what you’re talkin’ about.”

May frowned, eyes clouding with confusion. “But Peter said-”

“Can I just go talk to him? Get this figured out? I swear I do not have a second boyfriend.”

May’s cheeks puffed as she blew a heavy sigh. “Okay, yeah, you should probably go talk to him. Come on.” She ushered him in, the sudden switch in mood a little disorientating to Harley. She must have caught sight of the flowers behind Harley’s back, because she clicked her tongue. “I think you both have some gaps to fill in,” she said, pointing him toward Peter’s closed door.

Harley trudged forward, dread and confusion swirling around his insides. He knocked on the door, softly. “Peter?”

“Harley? What are you doing here? Shouldn’t you be on your d-date?” Peter’s voice was brittle and shaking like Harley had never heard it before, and it filled his heart with cold fear.

“I thought that’s what we were doing tonight, sweetheart,” he replied, sliding his open palm up against the closed bedroom door and resting his forehead on it. “I brought you flowers and everything.”

“No, you told me those flowers were for your boyfriend.”

Harley’s head was starting to hurt. “Yeah, they’re for you . Besides, I didn’t even tell you I was going to buy flowers at lunch. It was supposed to be a surprise. I thought you’d like them. It’s like, uh, lilies and daisies, I think.”

Harley could hear Peter’s quiet, sad chuckle from the other side of the door. “Yeah, I do like them. A lot, actually. But you told me you were giving them to your boyfriend, and if that’s not me, then-” as his voice trembled and faded into silence, Harley stood up straight so suddenly he nearly fell over, hoping beyond all hope that the realization he was coming to was wrong.

“Wait, what? Peter, I’m opening the door, because I still don’t understand how the hell you-” He pushed the door open, Peter stumbling backward away from the door at Harley’s warning. Harley’s eyes connected with Peter first, stomach dropping at his red eyes and downcast face.

Then, to the Spider-Man costume lying crumpled on the floor next to other discarded clothes. The flowers slipped from Harley’s hand and fell to the ground.

“Oh my God, you’re Spider-Man.” Harley’s eyes were bugging out of his head as he worked to reconstruct anything he had thought he knew five seconds ago.

Peter shook his head, arms opening with the palms turned up in a disbelieving expression. “Wait, you seriously didn’t know?”

“Why the hell would I have known that?” Harley said, nearly shouting. “You never told me!”

“I just- I figured Mr. Stark told you!” Peter blustered. “He tells you a lot of things, I figured he just- y’know, told you I was Spider-Man.”

“No, he didn’t tell me anything like that.” Harley blinked, still processing. “You’re seriously Spider-Man?”

“Yes!” Peter said. “I can’t believe you didn’t know, I thought-”

“But you never talk about it,” Harley said, confused. “I swear, you never mention anything about- about anything you do! Anyone you fight, anything that happens-”

“Yeah.” Now Peter looked a little embarrassed. “I think I did, in the beginning. But then I realized that I didn’t really want to talk about it all the time, not when I could talk with you about other stuff. I talk to Mr. Stark about all that when we’re working on my suit, but I like what we talk about better.” Pink colored his cheeks, and now he spoke in softer tones. “So, when you said that the flowers were for your boyfriend?”

“I didn’t exactly know my boyfriend was asking the question,” Harley said wryly. “So, no. I don’t have a second boyfriend. It’s just you. It’s always been just you.”

Tension spooled from Peter’s shoulders as his tense posture relaxed. Harley crossed the room, one arm drawing Peter in close. Peter’s arm wrapped around his own shoulders, squeezing him tight.

Peter laughed wetly, the remnants of a sob in his throat. “You’ve got to be the densest person I know,” he chuckled. “I can’t believe you didn’t know.”

Harley’s hand rubbed circles in Peter’s back, relief flooding through him. “Yeah, well, next time you’ve got a secret like that, you could tell me a little more explicitly, hm?”

Peter’s forehead buried in Harley’s shoulder. “Yeah,” he said, muffled. “Yeah, I will.”

Harley breathed out, chin brushing the side of Peter’s head. “You still feel like going out on that date? ‘Cause otherwise I gotta cancel some reservations, and I really don’t-”

“Yes!” Peter perked up. “Yes, I still want to go out. Just- I gotta get changed.”

“Yeah, yeah, okay.” Harley forced himself to move toward the doorway, knowing that if he stayed in there they’d never get to dinner. He scooped up the flowers on his way out, shutting the door. 

May looked at him with a calmer expression when he walked into the main room. “All figured out?” 

Harley slumped into the couch, weakly pulling on his now-wrinkled shirt. “Really, it’s his fault. He thought Tony just up and told me, and never decided to tell me himself. Who does that?” He chuckled, shaking his head. “Though, I think I probably could have connected the dots a little sooner if I paid any mind.”

May laughed. “Did I ever tell you how I found out he was Spider-Man?”

Harley leaned forward. “No, tell me.”

By the time May had finished telling the story, the flowers had been taken from Harley and set in a glass vase on the kitchen table, and then Peter stepped out, smiling as if the past few minutes had never happened.

“Hey,” he said. “Ready to go?”

“‘Course, sweetheart.” Harley checked his watch and blew a thin stream of air through his lips. “We’re going to have to hurry, otherwise we might be a little late.” He looked sideways at Peter. “Any chance you could, ah, swing us over there a little faster?”

Peter snickered. “Harley, I can’t just swing us to the restaurant without my mask on, that wouldn’t even make any sense.”

Harley threw his hands in the air. “What is the point of having a superhero as a boyfriend if he won’t use his powers for selfish purposes?” he asked in fake exasperation.

Peter pushed him lightly in the shoulder before pulling him back to kiss his cheek. “Maybe some other time,” he murmured lowly. Before Harley could figure out what that meant, Peter bounced back, waving goodbye to May and pulling them both out the door.

The next day, after a very nice date that ended with them making out in the backseat of Harley’s car, Peter strangely wasn’t at his locker after school when Harley walked up. It was just Ned who was putting a few notebooks into his bag.

“Where’s Peter?” Harley asked. “Is he in the bathroom or something?”

Ned wouldn’t meet his eyes, the first sign of something suspicious. “Uh. No. He got sick, and he had to go home during the middle of seventh period.”

Harley raised an eyebrow. “And he didn’t text me because?”

Ned swallowed. “Listen, man, I’m doing my best to keep this secret here, and if you keep asking me about it, I'm going to tell you, and then it’s not going to be as fun.”

Harley nodded. “Fair enough. Should I be heading somewhere specific, or what.”

Ned shrugged. “I think you’re just supposed to head out to the front. I don’t think Peter thought this part all the way through, to be honest, but I think you’ll like it.”

“Stop talking about it,” MJ hollered as she passed them in the hall. “You’ll ruin it. C’mon.” 

“Right.” Ned gave Harley an excited grin. “Have fun!” With that, he hurried off after MJ, leaving a very bemused Harley behind. Shrugging, he turned toward the front entrance of the school, unable to deny the flutter of excitement in his stomach.

Outside, Midtown High was still exiting from the school day. Some were waiting for rides, some were standing around talking, and some were making their way down the streets. Harley leaned up against a side wall, looking around. He looked down the streets and out at the cars, wondering if Happy was coming to pick him up or if Peter was going to walk up the sidewalk.

As it turned out, neither of those things happened, because for the second time in 24 hours, Spider-Man popped his head upside down in front of him. 

If Harley hadn’t been leaning against the wall he would have stumbled backward, but as it was he only ended up hitting his head against the stone wall in surprise. “P-Spider-Man?”

Spider-Man - no, Peter - held a finger to his lips. “Peter isn’t feeling too well,” he said cheerfully, and if Harley hadn’t known it was him, he would never have guessed. There was an extra layer in his voice, some sort of voice modulation that made it a little difficult to pin down the tone, just enough to throw off any suspicion. “So he sent me here to take you back to the Tower!”

Harley bit back a smile as Spider-Man flipped to the ground. Any student who was left was filming this interaction, so Harley made sure to think for a moment before speaking lest he give anything away.

“Oh no,” he said, filling his voice with false concern. “He’s sick? I didn’t even know, since he didn’t even bother to text me before he left.” A little bit of snark slid back into his voice, but he figured it would be fine.

“Wait, you really know Peter Parker?”

Flash Thompson had stepped up, thrusting his phone camera in Peter’s face as soon as he turned.

Peter’s shoulders tensed automatically. “Of course I do!” he said stiffly. “He helped design my suit.” 

Flash nodded, wide-eyed. “So cool. What’s your name?”

“And that’s all the time we have for today,” Peter said grandly. “Want me to carry you princess style?” he asked, turning his attention back to Harley.

Harley crossed his arms. “Like hell I’m gonna allow you to carry me like that.”

“Right, over the shoulder it is, then. Hold onto your backpack.” Before Harley could protest, Peter scooped him up over his shoulder and shot him up into the air, pulling them on top of the school.

He was set down immediately, and out of sight of the students below. “Just kidding,” Peter said. “We’ve got to do this another way, or you’ll fall way before we get to the Tower.”

Harley gulped. “We’re not going to go super high, right?”

Peter laughed and shook his head. “No, I’m not going to scale the Tower. C’mon. You’ve gotta wrap your legs around my waist, or this is never going to work.”

Harley sighed, but couldn’t keep the smile off his face as he jumped to wrap his arms around Peter’s neck and hook his legs around the hero’s waist. “Is this because you wouldn’t swing us to the restaurant last night?”

Peter nodded against his neck. “Yeah, figured after accidentally keeping Spider-Man from you for so long, I could at least do something like this to try and make up for it.”

Harley snorted. “I mean, you didn’t have to do any of this, but I’m sure glad that you did.” He tightened his hold on Peter, and one hand came to rest across his back. “Ready when you are.”

“No, you’re not,” Peter said simply, before leaping into the air and taking off. Harley screamed the whole way, and when they got back to the tower Harley swore on his life he would never do it again.

(He got used to it, eventually).

Notes:

we love a good miscommunication and overdramatic Peter

Series this work belongs to: