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Hoseok wakes up and his mouth is dry, with snot obstructing his throat and a visceral headache. It’s a Saturday and he’s supposed to work at the next-door supermarket, but he calls his boss, telling him with a groggy voice that he won’t be able to come in today.
After doing that, he flops back into bed, not having any energy to make himself anything to eat. At least he has his water bottle next to his bed, so he won’t die from dehydration, he tells himself before closing his eyes again and letting his mind drift to dreaming.
He wakes up again and when he looks at his phone it’s already 4 in the afternoon. That’s when he remembers that tonight is Seokjin’s big birthday event. He’s been talking about it for literal months, bragging about how it’ll be the best party of the year etcetera etcetera. But most of all, Hoseok knows how much this event means to Seokjin and he wouldn’t miss it for the world.
He decides to try and get up and eat something. The task finds to be much more difficult then he thought it would be. His whole body hurts, his skin hyperaware and he can’t decide if he feels too cold or too hot.
As he makes himself step into the kitchen of his small basement apartment, he finds he misses the light. He only has one window but it’s December and the sun has already mostly set. He opens his fridge and lets out a deep sigh that makes him fall into a fit of violent coughing. The fridge is almost empty. The only things left are condiments and his mom’s kimchi she gave him a few weeks ago. His stomach growls.
“I guess we’re eating kimchi”, he murmurs into the empty apartment. He takes the side dish out of the fridge and places it on the small table in the other room. He finds clean chopsticks in the sink and sits down to start eating. There’s a lot of kimchi but Hoseok isn’t sure he’ll eat that much. He’s hungry but one can only have so much of fermented cabbage.
As he eats, he starts fumbling on his phone. He opens their group chat (affectionately called seokjin and the six babies) and scrolls through the last messages.
Everyone seems really excited for tonight. Taehyung has already started rolling joints, which earns him a ‘nerd’ comment from Seokjin, while Jimin keeps sending different enormous vodka bottles from the alcohol store to the chat, asking them to help him chose which one to buy.
Hoseok sighs again, which makes him cough even more than last time. He really wants to go but he just knows that if he wants to rest and be able to work on Monday he should take it easy tonight. He has to break it to them somehow. So, he sends a picture to the chat, in it he’s got his pout on and he writes over his sad little bloated face: ‘hey guys im like really really sick right now, I slept all day and I still have this monster headache so… I don’t think I’ll make it tonight. sorry seokjin I really wanted to be there to celebrate with you and the boys but… yeah’
He hits sends and keeps himself from sighing again.
The responses come quickly.
[oh nooooo, aww well its fine hobi, don’t worry about it, we’ll miss u tho!!!! take care of yourself pls]
[NOOOOO HOBI HOW COULD U]
[awww drink lots of water hoba!!!]
[lame]
[fuckkkk who will smoke my v sexy joints with me then???]
[me tf]
[also me haha]
Hoseok smiles at the chat but his smile slides off his face when he sees he’s got a direct message from Jungkook.
Jungkook who he hasn’t seen since That Night.
He opens it fast before he can start to Think.
[hobi]
[u sick???? :((((]
He gulps with difficulty. What does this little bastard want now?
[yeahhhh :(((((]
[real sick]
He waits a bit and then:
[omw]
Wait… What?!
Hoseok panics.
[jk don’t come im like super disgusting plus I don’t want u to catch it]
He waits for a few minutes, but there’s no response, he’s probably already in his car.
Damn it. What should he do now?
Hoseok leaves the kimchi on the table and waddles as best as he can to the bathroom.
He looks at himself in the mirror. He’s utterly pathetic. He has the biggest bags under his eyes, his skin is breaking out, he sniffles and sees the snot moving inside his nose. He should take a shower.
He starts the water. He likes it steamy usually but right now with the state of his body he thinks it should probably be lukewarm. He winces when he puts a hand into the stream. His skin is so sensitive it hurts almost.
He stops the water from running. He feels exhausted all of a sudden. He knows he shouldn’t, Jeon Jungkook is on his way for goodness sake! But he feels himself moving out of the bathroom and into his room. There, he splays himself on the bed and falls deeply asleep.
The next thing he knows is there’s banging at his door.
He wakes up in a cold sweat, feeling even more disgusting than he already did.
The banging persists. He can also hear someone yelling? Or signing he isn’t sure. Oh. It’s Jungkook. Jungkook and his pretty voice, Jungkook and his pretty mouth, pretty hands, pretty eyes. Hoseok isn’t ready for this.
He does want the banging to stop so he gets up reluctantly and gets to the door limping.
He opens the door and feels what left of the air inside his lungs get utterly knocked out of him.
The sweetest sight of them all greets him: Jungkook Jeon with the cutest smile on his face, hair long and dark, wearing casual gym clothes and holding two bags of take out.
“Hobi!”, he exclaims before rushing to hug him into his body crushing arms.
Hoseok winces, his sensitive skin screaming to make it stop but a part of him decides to just enjoy the closeness with Jungkook as long as he can. He can’t help the sigh that falls from between his lips then, tired but content now that Jungkook is here. Sadly, he had forgotten how letting any kinf od air out of his mouth makes him go into a coughing fit.
Jungkook seems to pick up after his body language because he’s quite softer when he pulls back and looks at him in the eyes. “You look like shit, Hobi”, he giggles.
Hoseok rolls his eyes and smacks him behind his neck which makes him duck down for another hug, all careful limbs and nose diving into the side of Hoseok’s neck, sniffing like he’s been doing in recent months. Hoseok never knows if he’s smelling him or if he’s just that sensitive to smells.
He feels the cold tip of Jungkook’s nose grazing against the back of his ear before the younger one pulls back again, eyes shining and small smile stretching his pink lips.
Hoseok feels a bit dizzy already and Jungkook’s only been here a few seconds.
They go into the kitchen then, Jungkook drops the two take out bags on the counter and brags about how good the restaurant is and how they should totally go together sometime. Hoseok nods with a smile, not doing much to hide the fact that he isn’t at his best right now, knowing Jungkook understands.
“-and I hope he likes it I worked really hard on it but at the same time I-I don’t know if I’m satisfied with it. Wait, I’ll show you a picture.”
Jungkook takes out his phone and scrolls through it a bit before showing Hoseok the birthday card he made for Seokjin, since he left the real one in his car.
It’s a caricature of Seokjin, but since it’s in Jungkook’s style it’s still very flattering. It’s very accurate and kind of funny at the same time. “Awwww, Jungkook, this is awesome”, he says, genuinely. “I’m sure Jin will love it!”
That seems to make Jungkook very pleased, he can tell by the way the younger one bites at his bottom lip, pink dusting his cheeks as he says thank you in a very small voice.
After that they eat the Japchae Jungkook brought (and it is as delicious as Jungkook said it would be), the stir-fried noodles and the soft tofu stew bringing strength to Hoseok’s weak core.
They talk about Seokjin’s birthday mostly, but also about their days. It’s very domestic and Hoseok is thoroughly enjoying it but after half an hour he knows he has to get back to bed. He doesn’t know how to break it to Jungkook until the younger one starts complaining that he ate too much.
“I ate before coming here, didn’t want to drive with an empty stomach… But now I am so full, I will explode soon.”
Hoseok giggles weakly at that, watching Jungkook pat at his stomach with a satisfied smile on his face.
“Hey, JK, thanks so much for all of this, you’re the best, really. I think I’m going to go lie down now.”
He doesn’t realize he’s getting dizzy until he slides off his chair and almost falls forward, seeing black spots in front of his eyes. Strong arms keep him steady though.
“Hobi? You ok?”
“Y-yeah, I’m fine, I don’t know w-what happened.”
Jungkook’s hands grip him a little harder when he wobbles on his feet. He feels like he will fall asleep as soon as his body hits the mattress, or the couch or even the floor, really… But Jungkook seems to see where Hoseok’s thoughts are headed.
“Ok, no, not the floor”, he says seemingly very serious and worried which makes Hoseok laugh a bit. “Come on, Hobi, let’s get you to bed.”
It takes them a couple minutes to get there, but finally Hoseok climbs weakly into his bed. He closes his eyes immediately. He only opens one when he feels the mattress dip under the weight of Jungkook’s body as he seems to lay down behind him.
“What are you doing…”, Hoseok slurs through his already fogged up brain.
“Cuddling you”, answers Jungkook likes it’s obvious.
Hoseok snorts softly and turns around so he’s on his other side, facing the other boy.
Jungkook seems a bit startled at that and when they’re eyes meet there’s something there, something fermented and heavy, something that changes the air around them, the air they breathe seems hotter and buzzes with it. Something not so unfamiliar, since it has happened before. During that Night.
Wednesday, a few weeks ago
They were all hanging out together at Hoseok’s apartment. It’s a Wednesday night and everyone but Jungkook and Hoseok work in the morning. The goodbyes start, as Jimin and Taehyung retreat to their shared loft, slowly followed by a yawning Namjoon who gets offered a lift by Seokjin. Yoongi is the last to go, downing his beer and getting up like an old man, bones cracking from everywhere.
“Ok, time to go for me… I’ll see you soon.”
They hug and pat eachother on the back. Yoongi closes the door behind him with one last wave.
Jungkook and Hoseok are left alone. There’s silence at first apart from Jungkook’s wet sounds as he gulps down the rest of his beer. The air is electric but Hoseok isn’t sure Jungkook feels it as much as he does.
“Wanna smoke a joint?”, he asks.
Jungkook nods, looking up for it and indifferent at the same time. Hoseok knows him enough now to identify that expression as his ‘yeah i’m cool, i smoke weed sometimes’ look.
He chuckles to himself and goes to his room to go find his rolling material.
As he rolls the joint, they small talk. But there’s still this underlying tension that creeps under Hoseok’s skin, like maybe it wasn’t a good idea to be alone with Jungkook on a Wednesday night. He finds himself stuttering, like Jungkook does and that makes him blush a little. Is he being obvious? He can’t tell because Jungkook’s acting exactly the same as usual. Joking around and being silly, thriving on Hoseok’s attention. What would an outsider think of them? Would they see right through them?
They go on the balcony to smoke the joint.
They sit next to eachother and share a warm blanket since the temperature is getting cold during this time of the year. The view from there is nice, Hoseok lives at the last floor of the apartment building so they can see the top of the houses surrounding them. The sky is bright, almost rosy from all the lights of the city. They pass the joint back and forth, whispering to eachother and making weird faces to eachother. Once the joint is almost done, Jungkook drops it on the floor while passing it to Hoseok.
Hoseok goes to pick it up at the same time as Jungkook does the same. Their fingers touch as they reach for the joint, which makes them look at eachother. First, with a smile on their face as they giggle at their clumsiness, then they sober up, quickly enough that they end up just looking at eachother, joint forgotten on the floor for a moment. Jungkook seems to be about to say something but his ears turn red in a second and suddenly he’s getting up.
“I-I just need a glass of water, be right back-“
Hoseok lets him go, still in shock. He doesn’t know if it’s the weed or if Jungkook Jeon really just tried to kiss him. He immediately crosses out that thought out of his mind. That’s Jungkook he’s thinking about… Jungkook who just turned 22, who he doesn’t even know the last time he kissed someone. He feels horrible all of a sudden, finishing the joint he scrapped off the floor. He’s being obvious that’s for sure. He’s being… creepy.
The door creaks open and Jungkook comes out with a giant glass of water. He sits back next to Hoseok, ears still red but seemingly trying to act as if nothing happen. Hoseok is relieved, ‘acting as if nothing happened’ is his forte. He kills the joint and flicks it over the balcony.
“Hey, you could’ve kept it! That’s not good for the environment, Hobi!”
Hoseok smiles, sheepish. “Oh, you’re right, sorry… Bad habit.”
He takes out his pack and picks a cigarette that he balances at the edge of his lips. He’s about to light it when Jungkook catches him by surprise and lights it himself with his own little lighter.
Hoseok looks at Jungkook over the flame, the warm colors spreading to his small, cute, concentrated face. He notes the slope of his nose, the dip of his magenta lips, the sharpness of his eyebrows. It only takes a couple seconds but it’s enough that the warmth of the flame seems to spread inside his rib cage and into his fingertips. He looks away when their eyes meet and takes a long drag out of his cig.
He hears the click of Jungkook’s throat as he swallows. Then:
“I’m sorry for being weird, Hobi.”
He says it in a chuckle, but it ends up kind of sad. Hoseok does not understand.
“Being weird? What do you mean?”
Jungkook takes a quick look at him blowing the smoke out of the corner of his lips. He quickly looks away and gulps again.
“I don’t know… Wasn’t that weird, just a few minutes ago…?”
Hoseok doesn’t answer, keeps blowing out smoke. Jungkook takes a long swig out of his glass of water.
The silence stretches between them. The joint made them slow and hazy, but Hoseok’s heart is beating so fucking fast.
“Look, Jungkook…”, Hoseok starts but doesn’t know how to finish.
“I think I’m going to go home”, Jungkook says kind of loudly, all in one go.
He gets up and downs the whole glass of water. Hoseok wants to say something but he’s too high to think properly. He stands slowly, feeling his legs cry out in pain. He’s as much of an old man as Yoongi is apparently.
Jungkook has his ‘everything’s good, don’t worry about it’ face on and Hoseok thinks that’s a bit sad.
“You’re driving home?”
Jungkook nods.
“You sure you’re ok? You can always crash here-“
“Nah, it’s fine. It’s just two blocks away…”
They just stand there.
“Well, text me when you’re home, if- if you remember-“
“Yeah, yeah I will. Don’t worry.” A small smile. Red ears.
They hug. Briefly. Hoseok doesn’t bring him to the door, he still has to finish his cigarette.
He sits back down as he hears the front door close behind him. He waits as he finishes his cigarette, bundled up in the warm blanket, looks out for Jungkook downstairs, walking back to his mom’s car. He goes in, gets out of his parallel park and… he’s gone.
Present day
Since then, they havent really seen eachother one on one. But here they are again, the two of them alone together. In bed.
Jungkook who came here with take out and is now cuddling him to sleep.
There’s so much in between them even if they’re noses are almost touching because of how close they are. Hoseok is hyperaware of the way Jungkook’s arm is thrown over his side and his leg has found it’s way in between his.
They are at the same exact place they were on that infamous Wednesday. Jungkook’s ears are red, his eyes shine prettily, and he seems to be on the verge of saying something.
Hoseok is about to explode with how much he wants to kiss that boy.
“I want to kiss you”, whispers Jungkook.
He thinks he imagined it, but the second the words come out of his mouth, Jungkook turns around and hides under the blanket.
Hoseok’s heart is beating so hard in his chest. He has to hear it again; he has to be sure.
He gets under the blanket and is greeted by Jungkook’s back in his oversized black hoodie.
Jungkook groans. Hoseok is about to put a hand on his shoulder but Jungkook curves back into Hoseok’s arms and hides his face in the arch of Hoseok’s neck to his shoulder.
Hoseok gulps and he’s sure Jungkook can feel him vibrating against him. He feels feverish and he doesn’t know if that’s his cold or if that’s just how Jungkook will always make him feel.
“You… can.”
It gets out of his mouth without him knowing, but now he can’t take it back and he just has to wait for a response.
“No”, comes Jungkook’s voice, muffled by Hoseok’s sweatshirt.
“Why not?”, says Hoseok.
Jungkook gets his face out of Hoseok’s neck. Looks at him in the eyes, determined but also scared.
Hoseok bites at his bottom lip and that makes Jungkook’s gaze go to his mouth and before he knows it, they’re kissing.
It starts with a peck, a long one that Hoseok doesn’t want to end, ever. Then, Jungkook opens his mouth and Hoseok tastes his breath, something sweet and aching, something addicting. He can’t help himself, he dives in. He wants to take control but Jungkook doesn’t let him. Sucking at his bottom lip and nipping at his tongue. He rolls them over so he’s on top of Hoseok, who feels completely at his mercy. They kiss and kiss, tasting eachother and learning what feels good. Without thinking.
Hoseok could try to think of the consequences of their actions if he wanted to, but right now it feels impossible. His mind is blank, drunk on the way his and Jungkook’s lips feel as they move together. Everything wet and warm. Jungkook’s hair tickles his forehead so he opens his eyes.
Hoseok knows then.
Knows, looking at the way Jungkook’s eyes are pressed shut, eyebrows scrunched together. Knows he won’t be able to get over this boy for a long time. Maybe ever. He closes his eyes again and tries to slow down the kiss, tilting his head up and up, lapping at Jungkook’s lips but it only seems to work Jungkook up even more. He whines suddenly, seemingly frustrated with the pace Hoseok is going for. The noise goes straight to Hoseok’s groin. He takes a deep breath in between kisses and tries to turn them over so he can have beautiful, beautiful Jungkook under him. It doesn’t work. Jungkook puts all his weight on Hoseok, which is a lot, straddling his hips. It makes Hoseok laugh, delighted. Jungkook doesn’t seem to think it’s funny though. He stops right in his track, sitting up straight.
From where Hoseok’s laying on the bed, Jungkook looks like something out of this world. His floppy long hair all ruffled on one side; his cheeks flushed in the prettiest way Hoseok has ever seen. He’s panting and his eyes are glistening. He’s also pouting and Hoseok doesn’t know what he did wrong, but he will do anything to make it go away.
“Why did you laugh?”, Jungkook speaks up between breaths, chest heaving.
Hoseok chuckles again trying to remember what made him laugh now that this apparition in front of him has taken all his thoughts away.
That makes Jungkook bounce on Hoseok hips frustratingly as his pout deepens. Hoseok shudders as he feels Jungkook’s butt shuffling on his dick, which is filling up not so slowly.
“I-I… you’re just… a lot to take in-“
Jungkook pout drops but not in the way Hoseok wanted it to. He seems hurt.
“Not! Not, like that, I swear, you’re just, I… Jungkook-“
He wants to say something that makes any kind of sense but is cut off by Jungkook’s lips on his again. He sighs into it, marveling in the way their lips slide together, in the way Jungkook tastes so sweet but is so strong over him. He wants to put his hands somewhere, but he doesn’t know where is actually ok, so he just puts them on Jungkook’s shoulders, feels the way they move underneath the fabric. He doesn’t have much time to enjoy it before Jungkook’s grabbing his hands and sliding them down, onto his butt.
Hoseok’s hips buck up at that and he feels his face enflame with embarrassment. It doesn’t last long though because Jungkook moans at that, high and breathy (because of course he would sound like that) and Hoseok can’t help but squeeze Jungkook’s ass cheeks. They feel so firm and plush underneath his palms and now he can’t stop gripping at them. Especially now that he knows that’s one of Jungkook’s buttons that makes him keen like a dream.
They kiss for so long, Hoseok actually thinks he might fall sleep at some point. They’re making out on their sides now. Jungkook has a leg thrown possessively over Hoseok’s hips, and he’s clinging to him like a cute but very strong octopus. They’re kisses are less heated now, but all the more languorous. Jungkook keeps grinding slow little circles into Hoseok’s leg and it’s driving him crazy.
He doesn’t remember stopping the kissing. He wakes up a few hours later in the same position as before, but with Jungkook’s face hiding in his armpit. He seems to be fast asleep. Hoseok thinks of waking him up so he can go to Seokjin’s party but a selfish part of him ignores those thoughts. They need to talk about that, about what they want out of this, about how this changes things or not. Another time, Hoseok thinks as he slowly drifts back to sleep.