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It was almost five in the morning when Noel was dragged out of his dreams and into consciousness by the weight that was settling slowly between his legs. Careful, calculated movements brushed across his chest, up his thighs, and over his boxer briefs.
He didn't know what was going on.
Last night hit him like a smoke bomb. Muted flashes of colour burst behind his eyelids, painting a scene in murky detail. Dimly lit rooms, gratuitous skin contact, throat-burning alcohol... Oh, right. House party. Whose place was he at? It wasn't his room. It couldn't have been. The mattress was too soft and the pillow smelled wrong. Familiar, but not his.
Someone was pulling down his underwear, inch by inch. Noel remembered passing out in a bed after tripping on someone's shoes. Converse high tops, white. Kind of dusty and falling apart at the seams. Probably a hundred years old.
There was a pulling sensation near his dick. On his dick. Someone was trying to jerk him off.
Noel opened his eyes, sticky with sleep. He could barely catch a glimpse of brown locks before he had to squeeze his eyes shut because a mouth was around his cock, tongue flicking experimentally against the tip.
When he opened his eyes again, he did so with caution. Because the mouth on his dick was being cautious. It was contagious. Whoever was blowing him seemed to be awfully nervous about it. Maybe it was her first time? No, wait, it was his girlfriend. Of course. She was trying out some kind of new sex thing. They'd talked about it before. It was hot, being woken up by a blowjob. Noel felt his dick twitch.
He couldn't help it. She'd said specifically not to touch her when she tried it (because that would ruin it), but he had to tangle his fingers in her hair and pull her closer.
Except it wasn't her hair. It was covered in styling gel and the tips were frosted and when he pulled it up, away from himself in shock, the person attached to it yelped in a voice that sounded suspiciously like Cody's.
Suddenly, he was staring at Cody's frightened, doe-in-headlights expression, heart racing at a thousand miles per hour.
"Man, fuck," Cody mumbled. He sat on his heels and buried his face in his hands.
"... Yo, I... What–"
"I'm sorry. I know. I– I fucked up." Cody slumped forward. "I'm sorry."
"... I have a girlfriend." He felt like an asshole the second those words came out of his mouth. But he couldn't keep up with his brain. There were so many questions trying to escape his head at once that none of them could, and that was the lame response he'd settled on.
"Yeah, I– I know, dude. I'm sorry." He was still covering his face. "... If you were gonna punch me, then do it now. Please."
Noel stared at Cody like he'd just spoken a foreign language. That thought hadn't even crossed his mind. It never would have if Cody hadn't mentioned it. But, watching him shivering at the foot of the bed, he thought that maybe Cody said that more for himself than he did for Noel.
So he stood, balled up his fist, and socked Cody right in the cheek. He was going to hit harder, but he chickened out when he noticed the wetness in Cody's eyelashes. It probably still hurt like a motherfucker. It did, actually, judging by the way Cody cradled his face and refused to make eye contact.
The air in the room was suffocating.
Before the tension could get any worse, Noel picked his clothes up off the floor and got dressed. "I'm going home," he mumbled. Of course he stumbled over the high tops on the way out. He was always stumbling over Cody's shit.
When Noel got to the bedroom door, he stopped himself. At that point, Cody probably thought that Noel was never going to speak to him again. The truth was, Noel didn't know what he was going to do. He didn't know how to process what had just happened. He didn't want to throw away years of companionship and dedication just for this, whatever it was. Eventually, they were going to figure it out, because things always seemed to work out between them. And he wasn't about to let Cody think otherwise.
"Podcast tomorrow. Don't forget."
Cody didn't let his tears fall until he heard the front door close.