Archive of Our Own

For once, Mu Qing really wanted to go out and have fun, he really did.

After he graduated from college 3 years ago, he never, not once went out to get coffee with his friends--or just went out on a calm walk in the park for that matter.

He wanted to catch up with them and see what they were up to, he even heard one of them gave birth to twins one year ago. Mu Qing wanted to hold their little hands and tell them about how their parents met, his mind smiled at the memory of when he was still back in college and his friend was stubbornly telling him that he'll be the first person who will see her children.

But he was here now, looking at the mirror that prevented him to call them out or accept their invite. As well as the main reason he would silently, almost inaudibly cry at night when he thought his long term boyfriend was asleep (but he really wasn’t), the main reason for all of his inside fights that would create a thunder inside his brain even on the sunniest days. And the reason he up to this day struggles to express emotions, hurting people around him without being able to do anything.

He wanted to go and surprise his friend in her small flower shop that he helped her open. But the moment he steps in front of the mirror, it's as if a background voice tells him to stay right there where he is, that no one remembers him and that the way he aged up would only disappoint others.

He stood there, looking at his reflection. He wore nothing flashy at all, a plain black turtleneck followed by a pair of dark denim jeans framed with an oversized gingerbread-colored cardigan-it was his favorite.

He actually looked more than nice, it's just that his brain wouldn't acknowledge it, no matter what anyone said to him.

Maybe it's my hair, Mu Qing thought. Maybe it's a little bit too long for other people's liking?

It's not like anyone ever directly told him they dislike his hair specifically, but when you look at Mu Qing, then at some random man walking down the street, and then back at Mu Qing, the only thing you'd notice that is different would be their hair. 

It's not like he hated his hair, no. Sure, yeah, it would get super messy at times, and it would make him sweat super easily. He would also regularly gain weird looks from onlookers, and his stupidly handsome boyfriend that always held his hand as if the world would end if he was to ever let go didn't help, at all.

The only reason he kept his hair that way was because of that same boyfriend, he never lets a day pass by without saying he likes it.

But at this particular moment, Mu Qing really didn't think about the compliments he received from the people who cared for him.

There were scissors sitting on the small cupboard under the mirror, he took them without much thinking.

It's not like it would change his appearance that much, right? And it's definitely not like anyone would stop liking him only because he cut his hair. If anything, he won't receive weird stares from people anymore.

So he held those scissors, polishing the bronze surface with his delicate fingers.

Should he, or should he not. Having long hair and taking care of it became a habit after all, it would maybe be too big of a change for him. However, if he were to cut his hair then that would expose his neck and have his freckles on display, and we can't have that. What if he simply did cut it but n-

"Daaamn baby," the door of their house opened, "you look good."

Mu Qing quickly turned his head around, dark eyes meeting hazelnut ones.

His beloved was home. The main reason he still could smile.

He loved him, he made his life so, so much better. And no matter how cliche it might sound, he would never be ashamed to admit it out loud.

Even though they would often bicker like old couples do, he still never failed to make his day. And Mu Qing isn't lying when he says he can't imagine his life without him.

Mu Qing was fast to reply, "Feng Xin, this is how I always look. Stop spitting nonsense.” He liked to roll his eyes a lot, when he meant it and even when he didn't. This time was no different.

"I know, good." Feng Xin jokingly gave him a wide smile, but there was no sarcasm in his voice. "You always look good."

And no matter for how many years they have been dating, no matter how many times Feng Xin would shamelessly hit on him, he never failed to make the fellow one flustered, making his heart do a little dance inside of his body. 

However, Feng Xin's cheerful expression quickly changed when he noticed a pair of scissors in his lover's hands.

He slowly looked up from his hands to meet his dark eyes, eyebrows furrowed, "You aren't planning on cutting your hair, right?"

And it's the way Feng Xin asked that question that made Mu Qing put the scissors back on the cupboard. It only took one word from his boyfriend and he would do it. No matter what it was, Mu Qing was all his.

"I was, actually," he sheepishly smiled, eyes creating two crescent moons, "not anymore though."

Mu Qing leaned his back against the cupboard as he watched Feng Xin quickly take off his leather shoes, jacket suit following not long after along with the necktie, his eyes never leaving Mu Qing's.

With only his black shirt left, Mu Qing could perfectly see his well-defined muscles--them making his throat go dry. They always did.

They both graduated around 3 years ago, Mu Qing really didn't know the exact date--not that it was important. While he graduated as a fashion designer, Feng Xin chose law which automatically meant one thing, formal suits, all of the fucking time. Mu Qing didn’t like to swear, even more, he would often pinch Feng Xin under the table after he heard him voice out a vulgar sound, but Feng Xin’s body never failed to make him let out same those words that disgusted him.

The suits were always Mu Qing's weak point, and Feng Xin loved to wear them, something about looking good or whatever. And exactly that was Mu Qing's problem, he looked way, way too good in them for it to be true. 

The next moment, Mu Qing felt Feng Xin's hand placing itself around his waist, the other one coming up to his face to put one strand of hair behind his ear with a chaste kiss being pressed to his lips.

"You seem lost in thought, what happened? Tell me about it." Feng Xin said while dragging him to sit on the sofa, the dark wooden floor crackling under the pressure of their feet.

Their house was nice, it was more of a home than a house though. They began saving money to buy it when they turned 16.

Young and dumb. And in love.

Feng Xin was so desperate that he even started working at a bakery, he did indeed have a lot of fights with his parents since they weren't supporters, but he worked things out, and in the end, they even helped. On the other side, Mu Qing didn't start working because he had to take care of his mom, instead, he would never spend his weekly allowance.

And it worked, they did save up enough money over the years, and now they had their own warm home. 

"Hm? It's nothing, really." Mu Qing sat down.

"What is nothing?" Feng Xin sat down as well.

Mu Qing seemed lost for a moment but then gave Feng Xin a little pout. "I don't know, I forgot what you asked..." He hid a smile under the pout.

Feng Xin decided to shrug it off since his partner indeed did have his mind occupied, and he obviously didn't want to be a burden, "Then, why did you want to cut your hair?"

This time, Mu Qing only looked down at his hands that were placed in his lap, fingers intertwined, "I think it doesn't suit me. Never did, only thought it did because it became a habit." He sighed, "Plus you haven't said you like it for months now, I thought that maybe you got bored of it."

"You good baby?" Feng Xin swiftly took Mu Qing's hands in his own, making them lock eyes. "I love your hair, no lie."

The only thing that escaped Mu Qing's mouth was a small "Why?"

And it sure did look like Feng Xin was in the mood for talking. "Well, before everything I think it suits your character so well. Classy, shady, sometimes soft." He made sure to emphasize the word 'sometimes', gaining another eye-roll in the process, which he, of course, laughed off. "It's really stunning too, just like you," his hand went up to caress Mu Qing's cheek, "you're really stunning." 

Mu Qing opened his mouth wanting to say something, but Feng Xin quickly let go of his one hand and shook his index finger in front of the latter’s face, signaling that he wasn't done speaking yet. "And it looks so good when you iron it? Curl it with those weird colorful spirals?"

His face changed from confused to smug, "But it looks the best when it's sprawled over our white sheets, making your collarbones and freckles visible, while you're waiting for me to enter," he smiled, "that's when it truly looks the best."

Mu Qing let out an embarrassed whine, "Why did you have to remind me of my freckles?"

Feng Xin widened his eyes, "What about them? Don't tell me you don't like them either?"

"And if I don't?" Mu Qing replied, raising his eyebrows along with his head, confidently looking up at Feng Xin.

"Is that why you never tie your hair up," he awkwardly scratched his neck. "And why you often wear turtlenecks..."

Mu Qing nodded and soon after received a groan from Feng Xin.

"What's up?"

Feng Xin looked up, "Here I thought you were trying to hide the hickeys I left..."

Mu Qing only softly hit him on the leg, letting it rest there while shaking his head and smiling a smile full of charming teeth. "No, idiot. You don't even leave them on my neck that much. They are mostly on my... on my- on-"

"Aha, where? Say it," he interrupted while his hands went up to fix his bun, teasingly looking at his soon-to-be fiance. Mu Qing's hand only dug deeper into his boyfriend's calf.

"Nowhere," he said through gritted teeth, lifting his head to look at Feng Xin, giving him a 'don't ask any further look'. 

But because Feng Xin was Feng Xin, and simply because he loved teasing the person sitting in front of him, he had to oppose, "No no, baby you-you say it."

"ON MY THIGHS AND LOWER ABDOMEN LIKE A DOG YOU ARE. ARE YOU ACTUALLY A DOG FENG XIN? BECAUSE YOU SURE DO ACT LIKE ONE!" He lowered his voice before continuing, "Boy, my thighs are so red and purple I can't even look at them."

He raised his head to look at Feng Xin who now had a hand covering his mouth, trying to suppress the laughter that wanted to come out, "And since when did you decide to start leaving heart-shaped ones? What the fuck Feng Xin am I a fucking canvas?"

Feng Xin let that laugh come out. "Well, you could say that your body is a canvas for my lo-"

Mu Qing interrupted him: "Don't finish that sentence."

It looked like Mu Qing was already flustered enough, and as much Feng Xin liked teasing him he still had respect for him and wanted for him to feel comfortable. So he only smiled and nodded. 

But there were times when he didn't know what was too much and couldn't contain himself either, it was all out of good intention, of course.

He really was in a good mood. "Talking about your thighs, they are so beautiful," he stopped to give his lover a small and honest smile, "and your legs too. I still wonder how you make them look like that."

Mu Qing was confused, he furrowed his eyebrows. How can I control the way my body parts look? "They aren't even that nice, it's just that they're long, it's only because I'm tall. You're tall too, so you have long legs, it's nothing special. My legs are just normal."

Feng Xin shook his head, lifting his legs to sit in a lotus position. "No, it's not the same. You know those famous models, how their inner thighs and hips are flawless, as well as body proportions. You're like that, but even better, since you're mine." He smiled.

"Oho, so you are still watching porn, hm?” Mu Qing joked, but wore a serious expression on his face.

Feng Xin didn't seem to take it as a joke and quickly started to justify himself, "No. I am not." He furrowed his eyebrows, "I said models you can see on street adds."

"You did not say models on street adds," Mu Qing huffed.

Feng Xin watched him cross his arms over his chest. "I don't watch porn though."

As if Mu Qing was supposed to believe that, he himself would watch it sometimes, not to talk about the guy who dominated over him, of course, he watched it as well, even more than him too. "So you're trying to tell me you never jerk off?"

"No, I-" Feng Xin hesitated, "I do, of course I do, I'm only a man too. But instead of watching porn, I like to think of you.."

What? Who? Mu Qing was confused for a moment, before he came to a realization, sticking his head inside of his arms, face flustered. "W-what even is there to think about," he whispered, mounting a little "oh my God" after it.

But what wasn't there to think about? From Feng Xin's perspective, there was more than one thing he would think about, more than one thing his boyfriend would do what would make him go crazy. "Your voice for example, you let out such pretty sounds. Also, the way your body move-" He stopped himself as soon as he saw Mu Qing's pained expression, not wanting to cross the red line. “Mu Qing, it's just that you're so perfect."

Feng Xin gave him a soft, honest smile. "I love everything about you. From the way you think to the way you move. It's all perfect, really."

And really, oh my God indeed. If Mu Qing knew back when they were only two young boys, competing who's going to eat their ice cream faster, that the same boy who held his mother's hand so tightly, talking about how he's going to propose to his future girlfriend while playing the piano, if he knew that the exact same boy, now, a lot of years later would be sitting on the same couch as him telling him about how perfect he is, he's afraid he wouldn't have been able to believe.

What did I ever do to deserve this man, he thought. It's not like he thought of himself as a good lover, he would rarely cook anything for Feng Xin and he would often feel jealous, even when he deep inside knew that this brown-haired man would never cheat.

He really thought that he didn't deserve him, at all.

Feng Xin was everything he wasn't too, they were polar opposites.

He was patient and would wait for the right time to do or say something, Mu Qing wasn't, he would say whatever he wanted and whenever he wanted. Feng Xin knew when to stop, knew what the limit was, Mu Qing, again, did not. Feng Xin was everything but rude and harsh towards him, while Mu Qing didn't exactly care, as long as he had him.

It would hit him that he had said something wrong only after he’d see Feng Xin walk out of the front door and get lost in the dark night with the excuse of calming himself down.

Those kinds of nights were the worst to Mu Qing. He wouldn't eat, sleep or even think properly. Patiently waiting in front of their door for his boyfriend while thinking about things he should say to apologize.

And when Feng Xin would come back home, somewhere around midnight, he wouldn't listen to what Mu Qing had to say and would only show a sad smile, saying it didn't matter. 

It wasn't once that Mu Qing cried himself to sleep in their living room because of their fights that would get out of hand. It wasn't once that Mu Qing thought about ending it all because of the fights, and it wasn't once that he would go to his mom to give him advice.

Even after they would make up, Feng Xin would act as if nothing had happened. Treating him the same, making him smile the way no one ever made him smile, cooking his favorite dishes when he asked, pleasing him whenever he felt like it was time to. The list goes on, and Mu Qing really just doesn't know what qualities he has that still keep this man close to him.

Before he could continue thinking about those memories, his soft body sunk into a firm chest, strong arms supporting his form.

When did he start crying? Why were there tears rolling down his cheeks, eyes itching?

Love made Mu Qing feel all sorts of things, things he wanted to feel and those that he didn't wish to feel as well. But it wasn’t like he could control them.

"Why are you crying?" Feng Xin's hand was patting his hair, a gentle voice echoed right beside his ear. "Stop crying please, I hate to see you cry."

Why was he crying, he asked. Even he himself didn't know. Since when was he this emotional? Well, maybe since always, but it was thanks to moments like these that he realized.

"Mu Qing, I want to tell you something." Feng Xin put his arms on Mu Qing's shoulders, pushing them slightly away so the two were looking each other in the eyes. Mu Qing could feel Feng Xin’s fingers caressing his jaw.

"Remember when we met when we were thirteen? We met in front of your flat, I remember it very clearly. Your socks weren’t a pair, and when I asked why were you making a clown out of yourself you only said--and I'm quoting 'Maybe you should go and educate yourself instead of asking random strangers about their appearance. I am wearing different socks because today is World Down Syndrome Day and I am trying to support all kinds of people even at the expense of me looking kind of funny. So, I suggest you go and ask your parents about happenings in the world, and if they don't know then I highly recommend volunteering because that way you can learn about everything.' and I think that's why I fell in love with you in the first place."

Mu Qing felt another tear slide down his puffy cheeks. "H-how in the world do you remember my exact words when even I don't remember them?"

"How could I not? That day I went home and rewrote those sentences like--what, five? ten? times. Because I thought they sounded so smart coming out of the mouth of someone my age."

He slid his hand down to hold onto Mu Qing's forearm. "All I ever did was sit in the living room, eat cookies and play video games. So it was quite a shock when I heard those words coming from my peer." He continued, "It was really awkward seeing you at Ling Wen's birthday party the next day since you made total fun of me the day before."

His hand went up to wipe the tears staining Mu Qing's rosy cheeks. "But I couldn't stop staring at you. I didn't even know what was love, I was only thirteen after all, but I knew what butterflies were, and when I tell you that's when I felt them for the first time in my life."

"Me too," Mu Qing choked out. Feng Xin tilted his head, confused.

So he said, "I felt them too, that day. When Ling Wen made you cut the cake, so you listened to her and started cutting it and your tongue slightly poked out because you were concentrating." He gave him gentle smile. "I thought it was very cute."

Mu Qing continued with his outdated confession, "And after when Ling Wen's older sister forced me to wear that eyeliner, I saw the way your cheeks blushed but I thought it was because you were too cold, I was only thirteen too. So I thought I would land you my scarf but you only slapped my hand away-it made me super confused and angry but my insides kind of melted because your hand was really warm." He let out a quiet laugh.

Seeing Mu Qing laugh at him, Feng Xin laughed as well, deciding to say a small confession as well, "Later on, after I confessed under that snowy bridge, and after we started dating, you never failed to make my stomach feel those same butterflies. We were only fifteen but we thought we were the most mature lovers out there. We lost our virginity to each other one year later too-my parents scolded me so bad after they accidentally overheard us talking on the phone the next day, but I never even once regretted it." 

Mu Qing interrupted him, "Our virginities were your fault completely, I had nothing to do with them." But not long after Feng Xin huffed and smiled in disbelief, "Yeah right, out of all of my sister's clothing you decided to put a fucking tennis skirt on, and when I looked away you told me to look back."

"I did that to tease you, your ears were so red it was funny." He giggled, earning a soft slap from his boyfriend, "Mu Qing, you did that to tease me, so tell me, how was it my fault? You expected your lover to ignore you while you were bouncing around the room in a mini skirt, and that lover was in his most sexually risky years. It wasn't my fault."

Mu Qing scoffed. He could've just looked away without listening to me, or he could've called his sister, but noo, idiot decided to watch, he thought, his lips revealing a smug smile. "But you put it in me, I didn't put it in you."

Feng Xin quickly admitted his false defeat and switched themes, going back to innocently praising his lover, still wanting to lift his mood up. He knew everything actually, he knew what pained him, knew how bad he struggled with self-confidence and anxiety, and all of it hurt him. He only wanted Mu Qing to be happy, nothing more, nothing less. Feng Xin always thought about the things he could do to make Mu Qing happy, no matter what they were, no matter how they might influence him.

"Mu Qing, I like your hair, so don't even think about cutting it short. I also like the way you kiss," he laughed, "it can be super rough or super soft, it all depends on your mood. The way you're always trying to say things nicely--even when we both know you're struggling, and you're doing it just so you don't hurt me. I love all of it."

Mu Qing smiled wider, his tears making an appearance on his pale face again.

"I also adore the freckles on your neck and back, don't ever think they aren't pretty again, is that clear?" His expression suddenly turned serious but melted away as soon as he saw Mu Qing nod, a happy pout displayed on his face.

Feng Xin took that as an invitation to kiss him. Their lips met, cold ones meeting warmer. But when those two meet and melt against each other, they create the perfect temperature.

Mu Qing was the first one to break away, looking directly at Feng Xin's eyes. "I love you so much."

Feng Xin pecked him again. "I love you more."

"Then prove it."

But what Mu Qing wasn't expecting to see was Feng Xin reaching in his pocket, a gray velvet box revealing itself. 

"Feng Xin, this better not be a prank." Mu Qing wore a confused yet cautious expression. He again felt tears forming in the corner of his crystal eyes. "Feng Xin I'm being serio-"

Feng Xin softly kissed him again, whispering soft words of affection against his pulp lips. 

He smiled, this was the most honest smile Mu Qing ever received from Feng Xin. He imagined more than once about how this scene might play out, but he never expected this.

"Marry me?" And he swore to himself that he was ready to hear those two love words, but after hearing them leave Feng Xin's mouth, he couldn't help but break down, thinking it was all a dream. 

There were tears in Feng Xin's eyes too, one of them sliding down his cheek. He held an open box in his big palms, inside laid a rose gold ring, white and black diamonds set on it reflecting in blue light, the band was curved creating an arc. It was crown-shaped, Mu Qing teared up even more at the picture in front of him. 

Feng Xin was crying too. "It's because you rule over my heart, mind, body, and whatnot. You own all of it. So," he gulped, "will you let me finally officially coronate you?"

Mu Qing couldn't control his sobs anymore. Not minding them he nodded, and soon after, he felt a cold ring finding its place around his ring finger.

This time it was Mu Qing who kissed Feng Xin. It was slow and messy, their tongues dancing together, teeth comfortably clashing every now and then.

Mu Qing felt himself being placed on the other's lap, a hand coming to cup his jaw, fingers brushing against his cheekbones, softly rubbing them dry.  Soft pants leaving their mouths were harmonized with the crackling sound coming from the fireplace located behind them. 

Mu Qing held Feng Xin's face in his slender fingers now too, separating their lips by force, noses touching. "Feng Xin, make love to me."

That was all it took Feng Xin to kiss him even harder, sweet liquid drooling out of their mouths.

Feng Xin placed his hand under the other's buttocks, carefully lifting him up, Mu Qing's legs found their way around Feng Xin's solid waist, while his arms messily undid the buttons placed at the front of Feng Xin's work shirt. 

Their hearts were racing like crazy. It wasn't the first time they had sex, certainly not, but the way they would place their hands on each other, doing the movements they knew like the back of their hands never failed to make the blood rush through them. 

The stairs weren't narrow and Mu Qing wasn’t heavy, so Feng Xin didn't have much trouble escorting them to their room, again, not like it was the first time he was doing this. He was already more than experienced. 

He plopped Mu Qing onto the bed's soft surface, placing his legs on each side of his lover, hands going up to remove the cardigan that framed his upper body. Shortly after, both Mu Qing's cardigan and turtleneck were pulled down from him, cold air flowing all over his body.

It didn't last for too long due to Feng Xin taking his shirt off whose buttons had already been halfway undone. Their chests pressed together, Feng Xin grinding his nipples against Mu Qing's, causing friction, pleasure shooting through their bodies.

Feng Xin replaced his legs to sit between Mu Qing's while his hands lifted Mu Qing's thighs, trailing soft lines with his fingers against his inner thighs. Soon his jeans and underwear found their place on the dark wooden floor too, accompanying the rest of his clothes, leaving him fully naked under his fiance.

Feng Xin lowered his head, softly yet determently placing his lips on Mu Qing's freckled collarbones, teeth scraping the soft surface and tongue leaving wet trails, purplish marks soon to be visible.

Mu Qing trembled at the feeling of Feng Xin's hands carefully investigating his legs while his mouth was glued to the pale skin under his neck. His mind was a mess, white fog blurring all senses except the sense of touch which let him feel the pleasure Feng Xin brought to him. 

Without looking, he placed his fingers on Feng Xin's strong muscles, rubbing down quick patterns starting from his shoulders, down to his arms, reaching his abs. He shamelessly felt the nice structure under his fingertips, tracing the lines between tan muscles. 

When he felt Feng Xin's mouth leaving his shoulders, and reaching down to play with his nipples, he choked back a moan. A wet tongue was nubbing at one of his most sensitive spots, Feng Xin's arms slowly going up from his thighs, feeling the sensitive skin of his stomach, pinching it from time to time.

Mu Qing knew Feng Xin was good in bed, even when they had their first time together back when they were still in high school, he deftly touched Mu Qing all over without missing a single spot, as if he already knew all of his body's secrets that even Mu Qing himself didn't know. 

But since when was he this good in bed, Mu Qing wondered. He swore this man made him feel all types of pleasure, no matter how he handled him.

Over the years they were together they had both rough and tender sex, but no matter how many times they would repeat it, it was as if Mu Qing was experiencing it for the first time while Feng Xin already knew the territory well enough to dominate over it. 

Feng Xin was pressing soft kisses along his stomach, coming to a stop at the lower abdomen, making Mu Qing's back arch.

The sharp strike of pleasure flowed through his body right when Feng Xin sensually licked a long stripe up to his jaw, roughly biting it and leaving a soft pinkish mark. 

Feng Xin removed his arms from the latter's waist, bringing them up to Mu Qing’s mouth to heatedly push two fingers inside.

Saliva coated his fingers while he played with Mu Qing's tongue, touching it and feeling it all around.

He tore his eyes away from Mu Qing's mouth and lifted them to meet his fiancé’s lust filled ones.

Mu Qin's eyes were partially closed, cheeks still damp from crying, reflecting a soft light that seeped through the door. Eyelashes lowered and eyebrows reflexed, fully trusting Feng Xin. 

He pushed another finger inside of his mouth and moved his lips against Mu Qing's ear shell. "Love, we don't have lube," he whispered.

But Mu Qing didn't say anything, instead, his legs embraced Feng Xin's torso, hands pulling the fingers he sucked on out of his mouth, softly kissing his lover's nose before taking Feng Xin's hand in his own and bringing it down to his entrance, teasingly circling around it for a moment.

He smiled and let go of Feng Xin's hands, letting him have his own way with him. He knew he wouldn't disappoint no matter what. He also knew that the lack of lube shouldn't bring him any less pleasure, Feng Xin knew how to handle it.

He bit his lip when the first finger passed his rim, silkily going up and down a few times, then slowly working its way inside.

The second finger entered not much later, gently thrusting in and out with the other one, the ring finger softly pressing around Mu Qing's entrance, Feng Xin wetted it a little with his own saliva before pushing it in, earning a low moan from Mu Qing.

"I'll have to put the fourth finger inside as well," Feng Xin remarked. "Spread your legs wide."

So Mu Qing did.

He lifted his hips and placed them on Feng Xin's still clothed thigh, using his two hands to open his hips wider. He felt really exposed like this, in the position he was in, spreading his two own legs open, giving full view access to Feng Xin. 

Feng Xin worked the fourth finger inside, turning his hand around and steadily squelching them up and down, then curling them and hitting that bundle of nerves that made Mu Qing dissolve in pleasure. 

Mu Qing did play with his hole a couple of days ago when Feng Xing went out to meet with his friends, and he did it pretty roughly at that, so it didn't hurt that much since he was already partially stretched.

He knew that Feng Qing had noticed that his hole was already fully open with only a little bit of stretching, but decided not to say anything in order not to ruin the atmosphere and not to make Mu Qing feel uncomfortable. Mu Qing loved him for that.

Before Feng Xin took the fingers out he made sure to make a comment, "You're so pretty down here, it's really driving me crazy.

The way he spoke drove Mu Qing crazy too.

He soon pulled his fingers out, Mu Qing let out a misty huff at the feeling of emptiness. 

Feng Xin's arms left Mu Qing's body to go and unzip his pants. And, wow, it always succeeded in making Mu Qing's mind burn.

Feng Xin was already leaking with precum, the head of his cock dark red and ready to invade into Mu Qing’s soft insides. Mu Qing couldn't wait.

Feng Xin slowly closed Mu Qing's legs before grabbing him and gently turning him around.

Mu Qing was placed on all fours, hair blurring his sight of view and fingers softly gripping the fabric under him. His legs were tightly pressed together, waiting for Feng Xin to settle down. 

Feng Xin patted Mu Qing’s buttocks, then pumped his dick a couple of times before shoving a leg between Mu Qing's thighs, knocking his legs open and making Mu Qing open his mouth in surprise, colorless fluid sipping from his mouth onto white, silky sheets.

Feng Xin's hands came to grope Mu Qing's ass, parting his cheeks before pressing a wet kiss to the end of his spine and muttering a soft 'sorry'.

Mu Qing felt a wet head being pressed against his entrance, he buried his head in a pillow, hands leaving the sheets to go and hold onto the wooden bed frame above his head.

Feng Xin muttered another 'sorry' before shoving himself halfway inside, resulting in a loud scream from Mu Qing, it being muffled by the pillow. 

"Is it okay?" Feng Xin wanted to make sure he wasn't hurting the one he loved, it always had to hurt a little bit in the beginning, he was aware of that, but since Mu Qing was already stretched and slicked it shouldn't be too much of a problem. 

Mu Qing took some time to reply. "Y-yes, God it's alright-aah." Feng Xin didn't wait for him to finish before pushing the rest of his erection inside, his lover throwing his head up in pleasure.

Feng Xin's hands were still safely secured around Mu Qing's hips, tightly gripping the soft flesh, and Mu Qing knew it was going to create dark spots, but neither of them seemed to care. After all, Mu Qing liked being marked by his lover, and Feng Xin loved marking his territory. 

"Feng Xin, go harder. I swear I can take it." He turned around to look at him. "Wreck me please, I need it." Feng Xin didn't need to be told twice, smashing his hips against Mu Qing's butt, groaning. 

The way Mu Qing would perk his butt up, Mu Qing would moan and pant, the way he would shamelessly do and say seductive things with the intention of firing his former boyfriend up, all of those turned Feng Xin incredibly on.

Just like now, having his cock buried deep inside his lover, forcefully pressing at his hickeys formed on the soft skin, listening to Mu Qing groan in pain and watching him forcefully push himself back onto Feng Xin's erection when he stopped to let the shorter take a breather.

Every single one of those made Feng Xin feel incredibly blessed. 

Mu Qing was a pure soul. Sure, sometimes he didn't have any tact at all. People would think bad of Mu Qing only because he sometimes couldn't control his words or actions.

But Feng Xin knew him better than those people did. He knew him better than anyone did for that matter. And he knew that Mu Qing also knew him better than anyone else.

No one could compare.

Feng Xin had his mind preoccupied with his lover's moans and movements that he forgot how hard he was slamming against him. The latter doing nothing except screaming in his pillow, arms shaking against the bedhead. "Lift your head up baby, I want to hear you properly."

Mu Qing listened to him, raising his head up, looking at the headboard. "Feng- ah- Feng Xin I-I want your cum leaking from me," Mu Qing quivered, hips buckling and his hand going behind to touch at his entrance.

"Fill me up."

And Feng Xin did just that.

Fill me up, Mu Qing had said, Feng Xin had no reason to disobey. He released inside of his fiancé, exited, and let more of that warm liquid release directly around Mu Qing's entrance. He pushed his fingers inside of his hole, not letting any of his cum leave the place.

Mu Qing came untouched right after Feng Xin, too. His body shaking under Feng Xin's and legs sliding down the silk mattress. White substance dripping down from his entrance to thighs and onto the white bedding. 

He let Feng Xin kiss his freckles, feeling his fingers going through his hair while they were both calming down from their climax.

Mu Qing turned around to lay on his back, looking directly at Feng Xin and pulling him down in another heated kiss.

Feng Xin licked his mouth, and Mu Qing opened it, letting the tongue slide in and clash with his. Feng Xin wanted dominance, Mu Qing let him have dominance. Feng Xin wanted to break the kiss after one minute, Mu Qing let him.

“I want to ride you,” Mu Qing insisted while lovingly gazing into his fiancé’s eyes. “Quickly, I’ll turn you on again.”

Feng Xin didn’t have the time to react before his boyfriend pushed him away, reaching to the drawer of his nightstand and getting a glass toy out.

Mu Qing quickly bounced back on their bed, sitting on his thighs he wanted to draw Feng Xin's attention back to him, “Feng Xin, look at me.” He didn’t even let out a breath, waiting for Mu Qing to do what he intended on doing, feeling his cock sting again.

Mu Qing lowered himself a little bit, his lower back pressing onto the mattress and legs opened right in front of Feng Xin’s eyes.

Feng Xin watched his lover push the glass dildo inside of his mouth, a transparent liquid staining the hard surface of the object.

Mu Qing licked the cold tip a couple of times, then slurped the excess liquid, his lips against the glass creating filthy sounds, and oh Feng Xin’s real thing was much better than this piece of fakery. But he still found the use of it.

He slid the dildo down to his entrance, circled around it a couple of times, and then roughly shoved it inside, a cold object invading his private space.

He looked down at the transparent piece that was pressuring Feng Xin’s cum out of his hole. Then, his eyes went up to meet with Feng Xin’s, he found Feng Xin calmly absorbing the scenery that was playing in front of him.

Mu Qing knew that he somewhat liked it.

He then pushed himself onto his buttocks and started pressing himself against the hard glass that was no longer so cold, his eyes never leaving Feng Xin’s. Younger Mu Qing would always bite his lips with the intention to suppress his moans, feeling embarrassed about them. But the former Mu Qing was much different, he wasn't ashamed of moaning in front of his partner, and would even fake moans sometimes in order to turn Feng Xin even more on.

And before he knew anything else he heard Feng Xin give a low groan, hands coming to grab Mu Qing by the waist and strip him off of the wet dildo.

“What’s the deal with you?” He laughed while gently stroking up and down his sides, meeting his hips and then going up to play with his own nipples.

Feng Xin’s expression remained unchanged. “Let go of that object, it’s small. Do it with a real deal normally.”

Mu Qing couldn’t help but laugh, pushing Feng Xin back to lay down, his hips straddling his lover’s. His eyes followed his fingers that were now massaging Feng Xin’s abs, going up to look at his love with a teasing smile displayed on his face.

“Don’t tell me you are jealous of that piece of glass.” He bit his lip, teeth grazing over the pink skin.

Not waiting for Feng Xin to defend himself he quickly added, “Do not worry. You are much warmer and bigger, your cock has a texture and is naturally wet," he paused, "and you know me better than that thing.”

He looked at Fen Xin’s cock standing straight, pulsing. “Here, here.”

He not so gently pushed himself onto Feng Xin’s dark erection. After that his eyes lost focus, but he felt Feng Xin’s big palms coming up to hold him by the hips, supporting him so Mu Qing doesn't lose balance.

Mu Qing didn’t wait for Feng Xin to do anything else before he slowly lifted himself up and then roughly dropped down, wet noises escaping through his mouth, blending together with Feng Xin's.

This time it wasn’t forceful, it was slow and passionate. Just like how they both liked it the most.

Mu Qing knew only two things while slamming himself onto Feng Xin’s cock.

The first was, he felt amazing. This was the best night of his life, and he wouldn’t deny it. He never felt more pleasure, and never felt the other’s love sparkling like this.

The second was, tomorrow he would need to be carried by Feng Xin everywhere.

The two went like that for half of the night, maybe even more, and only when the birds' chirping could be heard outside did Feng Xin pull out, pressing Mu Qing into his embrace.

The sheets were sticky, they were sticky too, everything was sticky. The smell of sex floated in the air and it was way too hot in the room, but neither of them acknowledged that. How could they? They couldn't, not really. Not when they were lying in each other's hands, slowly panting, but smiling. 

Feng Xin kissed Mu Qing's hair and was the first one to break the silence. "That was good."

His chest vibrated at Mu Qing's laugh. "It sure was. The next time I'll let you fuck me will be on the night you see me walking down that aisle."

Mu Qing buried his head in Feng Xin's chest, a soft smile reflecting on his ashen skin. "But don't be sad, big boy. I won't make you wait for too long."

The morning came faster than they both expected, it was the weekend, so naturally, Mu Qing wanted to cuddle all day long and do nothing but steal lazy kisses from his fiancé while clinging onto his back like a koala. 

But he didn't expect Feng Xin's alarm going off early in the morning, just a couple of hours after they finished their hot session. He was the first one to open his eyes, gently tapping his lover's chest while wrapping himself in a blanket. He looked around the room, his eyes still blurred from the lack of sleep. 

He first realized he was sticky, like, awfully sticky. He was laying on Feng Xin's abdomen that was sticky too, he immediately made a face of disgust. 

Slowly lifting himself up while rubbing his eyes, he realized the mess this room was in. Their clothing was scattered all over the floor, the bedsheets were laying on the cold wood too. There was a glass dildo, Mu Qing's favorite-he must admit, it had a crusted layer of white fluid over it. Mu Qing was even more disgusted than before.

Then he took a look at Feng Xin who was still peacefully sleeping, not minding Mu Qing's tapping. Realizing he couldn't wake him up like this, Mu Qing pinched his side earning a groan from Feng Xin who slowly opened his eyes, looking at Mu Qing. 

Mu Qing was annoyed, "Why is your alarm on? Quick, turn it off and go back to sleep while I make breakfast."

Suddenly Feng Xin jumped out of the bed, grabbed his phone, and rushed out of the room. Mu Qing could hear him curse while hurrying down the stairs, "Fuck fuck fuck, I'm gonna be late for the meeting."

Meeting? What meeting? Mu Qing grabbed a suit for Feng Xin and slowly charged down the stairs, draping Feng Xin's t-shirt over his head while watching Feng Xin panickedly wash his teeth and put his underwear on. 

He looked more than funny, Mu Qing couldn't help but laugh. "What's up with you, it's weekend."

Feng Xin paused for a moment to catch the outfit Mu Qing grabbed for him but then continued panicking.

"If you continue ignoring me I'm going to get mad-" He didn't even have the time to finish his sentence before his lover quickly came up to him to nibble at his lips, his hand going down to pat Mu Qing's ass. "Morning baby, please don't get mad." He let go of him and took a mouthful of cereals that Mu Qing made last night. "I have a special meeting today, I will be home soon."

Ew-Mu Qing stuck out his tongue in disgust. "Then, let me text Yushi Huang and make plans for today." He sat down at their kitchen island and pointed his index finger at the clock, "It's not even seven am, you still have an hour before work, don't rush."

Feng Xin seemed to be surprised, slowly lifting his head up to look at where Mu Qing's finger was pointing. He hit his head against the fridge when he realized he misread the time, but then soon calmed down, inhaled and exhaled a couple of times, and switched his gaze from the clock to Mu Qing.

Mu Qing looked back at him and raised his eyebrows, signaling for him to put his suit on while he talks to his friend. 

Soon, a couple of sentences echoed through the phone making Mu Qing laugh; "Huh, Mu Qing? Oh my God, it's Mu Qing, it's going to snow." Only after hearing Mu Qing's laugh did Yushi Huang continue, "I gave birth to Pei Ming's kids, Mu Qing. Two kids at that, and where were you to hold my hand while I was struggling, huh? Where?" 

Those words made Mu Qing laugh even harder, a sharp pain shooting up his spine, he toned down his laughter before answering her, "I'm sorry. Today at nine, is that fine, I know your work starts at eight so it should be around your breakfast break right?"

"Whenever is fine, I'll make it work for you. See you at that cafe at nine?"

Mu Qing quickly agreed and struggled up the stairs to wear something, he just decided to put on the same clothes he planned on wearing yesterday since they were clean, not minding his appearance anymore. He only changed the turtleneck to a normal black cotton shirt. Going down again, he caught Feng Xin, this time fully clothed, eating the rest of those cereals. 

"Disgusting Feng Xin, eat something normal and fresh." Seeing that Feng Xin didn't mind his words and only waved his hand for him to come sit and eat as well he added, "At least change the spoon, I already ate with that one."

"Is that even important? We can go on the whole night but can't share the cutlery? Please Mu Qing come eat some fruits I cut." 

Again, Mu Qing didn't expect anything else from this man, he was shameless and he didn't expect him to change, neither did he want that change.

Mu Qing listened to him and sat down to eat without much protesting. He was aware of his dirtiness, neither of them showered this morning, both were filthy under the clothing, the smell of sex was somehow still in the air. But again, they didn't really care.

After breakfast Mu Qing stood in front of that same old mirror, looking at his reflection, he wore a soft smile. Now that he thought about it, his freckles weren't that ugly and his hair looked pretty good when naturally dried. His facial features were beautiful too, not that he would ever loudly acknowledge it, but his smile widened after realizing it. 

There were hickeys on his neck, hair covered them, but he wasn't ashamed of showing them anymore. What was there to be ashamed of? Of being loved? Or having an active sexual life? Neither of those things was something someone should be ashamed of, not even Mu Qing himself.

The next moment he felt Feng Xin's warm breath tickling his neck, hands grabbing him by his waist. 

In the mirror stood the reflection of two men, one hugging the other, both of them wearing candid smiles, looking at each other through that same mirror. Just a few hours ago Mu Qing wished to throw that mirror away, and never again bring home another. But now, seeing a happy family inside of it, he changed his mind.

His eyes fell down from Feng Xin's charming face to look at his finger. It was no longer empty, there was a golden ring accompanying it now. He felt Feng Xin's voice right beside his ear, snapping him back to reality and tickling him in the process, "You look really pretty." 

Mu Qing turned around, pushing Feng Xin away and unlocking the door, "You're driving me to Central Park, I can't walk." He exited, his lover followed behind him.

Feng Xin locked the door, "How bad does it hurt on a scale from one to ten?"

Mu Qing knew that Feng Xin was just teasing and playing with him so he decided not to mind too much, and honestly answered while getting in the car and sitting in the passenger seat, "It's a solid ten." 

The ride was just like every other, soft jokes were being thrown from time to time, making them throw their heads back in laughter. A couple of times Mu Qing even had to tell Feng Xin to look at the road and not at him through the rearview mirror, it resulting in a couple of cheesy sentences that would make Mu Qing's cheeks produce a faint red color.

Not long after, he strolled down the park, his eyes meeting his missed best friend's. He missed her so, so much. And he is so happy that he finally decided to meet up with her. After a lot of inside fights, it really was deserved.

He absorbed his best friend who was slowly sipping at her cold herbal tea. "You are wearing the dress I designed," he noticed, a proud smile revealing itself from under his lips.

Yushi Huang put her cup down, looking him up and down. "You look good too." She stopped for a moment to bend her back and move a couple of strands of Mu Qing's hair behind his ear, "You had fun last night."

Mu Qing hid back an embarrassed smile, showing a teasing one instead. "Yeah I bounced up and down on it pretty hard," he admitted with slapping his hands against each other.

Seeing Yushi Huang furrow her eyebrows while looking around to make sure no one heard their conversation just now he decided not to tease her anymore, quickly switching the subject, "Where are your babies?"

This time she reflexed her eyebrows and took another sip of tea. "Pei Ming took them to his office, it's Bring Your Child to Work Day. He didn't even let me object before rushing out."

"Well, he probably wants to flex that he finally settled down and even has pretty children," He laughed at Yushi Huang's expression.

She scolded him, "And you? What about you? I made a family while you were probably just lazying around your house, stealing kisses and drawing models." 

But before she could scold any more, Mu Qing flashed his right hand in front of her face. Seeing her eyes widen and mouth slowly starting to part he decided to quickly explain, "I am starting a family too." Those words sounded weird coming from his own mouth, his expression erased itself from his face. "I am getting married," he seemed like he was just now coming to a realization. "Oh my God Huang, I am getting married."

Yushi Huang only clapped her hands together, smiling widely. She felt more than happy for him, remembering all of their late night talks, she smiled. She remembered this one time Mu Qing complained about Feng Xin only studying all day long, which resulted in Pei Ming personally splashing his beer all over him and telling him how he should pay more attention to his lover. She also remembered the night when he rushed into her dorm room to tell her about one pretty girl who confessed to Feng Xin, she remembered how she patted his back telling him that no matter what, Feng Xin would never leave him, and if he does, then she will personally kick both of them with her Versace heels. In the end, it turned out that Feng Xin politely rejected the girl, and even told her that he has a partner with whom he wants to spend the rest of his life.

She smiled even wider. "Congratulations. I helped him pick the ring, but he didn't listen to me at all. He wanted a crown and a crown only, so I let him. He had to buy me baby shoes as an apology." She laughed, taking Mu Qing's hand in her own to inspect the ring, it was pretty. "It suits you."

The rest of their conversation went smoothly, they talked about Yushi Huang's flower shop, which is now working better than ever. Mu Qing found the time to brag about his new clothing line getting promoted before even officially coming out. His new manager wouldn't stop asking what his brand name, "FQ" meant, and Mu Qing never even once planned on telling him.

They also talked about Yushi Huang's struggles with babies and Pei Ming, she even a couple of times mentioned how Pei Ming is harder to deal with than her young kids.

When the Sun came down and created a beautiful orange scenery sprinkled over with stars, only then did they part. Mu Qing happily dialed his mother's phone number, telling her about the great news, and then listened to her cry and worry for the rest of his walk home.

Feng Xin came home quickly too, they ate Mu Qing's favorite food before bathing together and watching the old videotapes of them.

Mu Qing always felt like he was at home while in this house, but this time, he, for the first time felt like he truly belonged here, and here only, in his husband's arms, while they reminisced about the good old times, the smell of freshly baked pancakes together with warm gusts of air keeping them company.

He truly felt, more than happy.