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Illumi shut the door to their apartment quietly and by the time he did Hisoka had already stormed into his room.
Their shared apartment was big. Illumi had insisted that despite living together him and Hisoka ought to have separate bedrooms should they need their own personal space. Hisoka obliged his request, though most of the time Illumi found himself sleeping in Hisoka’s bedroom surrounded by Hisoka’s many obnoxious pillows.
Illumi looked at the shopping bags he’d settled on the floor in order to close the door. The day was nothing out of the ordinary- simple shopping. It was something Illumi had to get accustomed to now that he lived in their Yorkshin apartment but his husband had begun to act strangely in the past months and it was affecting their day-to-day life.
Illumi set about putting things away but he could not stop thinking about Hisoka’s behaviour. Ever since Hisoka brought up them having a child together a few months ago Hisoka had begun to act very irate when he’d see parents and children.
At first it was mild agitation which Illumi knew was normal, Hisoka never really did like kids in the first place but that had begun to slowly escalate. Hisoka’s gaze would linger on parents and their kids, on how they would show affection to their children, on how they’d pretend completing menial tasks was a big accomplishment for their kids, how fathers would carry kids on piggyback rides and how mothers dressed their children because they thought the weather was too cold. He’d look at them with a face of scrutiny and disgust as if he was debating on whether or not they got to walk away from him with their lives that day.
If Illumi didn’t know Hisoka as well as he did, he’d think Hisoka wanted what those kids had as a result of him being orphaned but he knew that wasn’t the case. Hisoka was debating something but Illumi could not yet pinpoint the nature of his thoughts.
Whatever they were though, Hisoka was getting worse and worse by the week and today it hit an all-time high.
Hisoka and him had been browsing through a clothing store and a child had run face-first into Hisoka’s knee. It, of course, didn’t hurt Hisoka but the action of it was apparently so revolting to Hisoka that for a second, he’d let go of his bloodlust and frightened everyone in the store including the already distressed child. He stopped it immediately but it was enough to cause a scene and pull all eyes to Hisoka. Seconds later the very distressed mother of the child had shown up to apologise profusely to Hisoka for her child’s behaviour while trying to console the crying child.
“You should watch him more carefully, miss. You don’t want him to get hurt, do you?” Was what Hisoka had said to the poor mother but his tone was so sickly sweet it sounded twisted; his smile so artificial and uncanny as he put both of his large hands on the child’s shoulders and pushed him forward to his mother. The poor woman could only blink at him and agree.
Hisoka took one look at Illumi and stormed out of the building.
With that Illumi realised he’d finish putting their shopping away and all that was left were just clothes they had purchased but that could be delt with later.
He walked over to Hisoka’s room and knocked gently.
“May I come in?” Illumi asked.
He heard a lazy “yes” from behind the door and entered. Hisoka was reading but as soon as Illumi came in he set his book on the bedside table. Hisoka grinned at him.
“You really don’t have to ask to come in. You’re not my roommate. This is as much my house as it is yours.” Hisoka said, half laughing and gesturing for Illumi to sit on his bed.
“This is still your private space; I do not want to impose. May we speak?” Illumi asked as he moved to sit not on the bed but in Hisoka’s lap instead, looking at Hisoka who looked back at him quizzically.
“You have been exasperated lately and it always seems to happen around parents and children. Is something wrong?” Illumi asked, holding Hisoka’s face in his hands and looking into his eyes as if his husband’s face alone would give him the answer. Hisoka moved Illumi’s hands from his face so that he could speak.
“Nothing is wrong, dear. I just don’t like children, you know this.” Hisoka said, his voice low, his hands caressing Illumi’s strong thighs and waist as he was now firmly seated in Hisoka’s lap.
“I know but recently you have been particularly agitated by even the sight of them. I understand you may not want to talk but it is important we discuss this. As husbands.” Illumi’s face was mostly blank but Hisoka knew he demanded an answer. There wasn’t much point in trying to cover that as Illumi knew something was off. Hisoka looked to the side as he thought about what to say.
Illumi continued:
“Hisoka, I live with you. I am sensitive to your aura and your bloodlust. If you release that amount of bloodlust like you did today, I assume a serious threat is nearby. It is very dangerous to do that considering attempts on our lives happen sometimes.” Illumi explained and Hisoka grinned back at him as he kissed his left hand gently.
“Aw, sweetheart, did I scare you?” Hisoka mused. Illumi took his hand away.
“You startled me. There is a difference. Tell me what is going on.” Illumi challenged him with a more serious tone now.
Hisoka crossed his arms in front of his chest and looked to the side again.
“Illumi, if I knew how to explain this to you, I would have done it already.” Hisoka looked annoyed.
“I suppose I am angry? I can't wrap my head around it, really. I look at them every day. Puny, weak, unconcerned with their tiny, insignificant lives and their stupidity but yet they get to have children? They get to teach their kids and pass down skills and knowledge and we can’t. It’s infuriating.” Hisoka explained. “What if we could do that? Me and you could raise the perfect killer.”
Illumi thought about it for a moment.
“When I asked you if you wanted to have children with me, you said no. Why?” Illumi questioned.
Hisoka looked at him, annoyed. “I still do not want kids; I hate those things. They're defenceless, they cry all the time and they're dependant-”
“You did not hate Killua and Gon.” Illumi interrupted.
“Killua and Gon were twelve when I met them and although they were kids those two were brimming with talent. It's not like I had to change their diapers. I liked Killua and Gon because I wanted to fight them.”
“I suppose I'm just annoyed that even if we did want kids, we couldn’t have any.” Hisoka shrugged.
Illumi put his fist to his chin, thinking. He sat down further into Hisoka’s lap, blissfully conscious but uncaring about the fact that his weight was crushing his husband’s balls. Hisoka didn’t complain.
“Should I kidnap a child?” Illumi blinked at Hisoka questioningly.
Hisoka burst out laughing.
“That way you can see if you like having one around and taking care of it.” It made sense in Illumi’s head as far as he was concerned, he did not understand why Hisoka found it funny.
“Illumi, that is a terrible, terrible idea. I normally like those but not this time.” Hisoka smiled as he leaned into Illumi’s chest to kiss it. He’d unbuttoned Illumi’s shirt while the raven-haired man spoke earlier. He was kissing down his sternum when suddenly Illumi’s hands gripped his shoulders and shoved him back.
“Shall I have a child then? It would, of course, have to be with a woman.” Illumi spoke calmly at Hisoka.
“Illumi.” Hisoka’s nails dug into Illumi’s thighs; Hisoka was smiling at his husband but his face was contorted in a manic grin like earlier that day.
Illumi understood the answer. He put his fingers through Hisoka’s hair and pushed him to his chest again so the other man could resume his actions. Hisoka’s lips met Illumi’s pale flesh as he kissed down his chest languidly. Illumi was unresponsive, he was back to thinking.
Illumi sighed in the end.
“Then it is decided. Tomorrow I will call Killu.” Hisoka raised an eyebrow at him.
“I have been thinking about it, of course. What you said a few months ago, although stupid, makes the most sense.” Illumi was taking off his shirt while explaining himself.
“Nanika could potentially fulfil this wish with ease and maximum efficiency.” Hisoka helped Illumi with his shirt by throwing it as far away from their bed as possible. They were chest to chest now.
“What, you don’t want to try and grow one ourselves in a lab first?” Hisoka was laughing to himself again.
Illumi pushed Hisoka back until he lay relaxed on the bed. He slid himself a bit further up Hisoka’s body until he sat on his stomach. His left hand dragged slowly up Hisoka’s torso, slender fingers dragging absentmindedly until they reached his neck. They wrapped around slowly on the magician’s throat, putting mild pressure there, making Hisoka instinctively lift his head upwards to comply with Illumi’s actions.
Hisoka knew what Illumi was insinuating with what he’d said.
“You haven't seen Killua for some time and the last time you saw Alluka was when we tried to kill Nanika.” He knew Illumi was listening but Hisoka was starting to find it hard to make sentences with Illumi’s right hand getting closer to waistband.
“No offence, darling, but if that was me, I would not be so inclined as to help.” Hisoka’s breath hitched at the end of the sentence when Illumi fingers firmly gripped his shaft. Hisoka grunted from the sudden feeling of pleasure; his body got goosebumps all over. Illumi began stroking him lazily.
“This is a family matter. Killu is old enough to understand that this request is for the benefit of us and the family as a whole. I do not intend to harm anyone with it.” Illumi’s left hand was putting pressure on Hisoka’s carotid arteries which left him with a pleasurable feeling of mild suffocation as he continued the movements with his right hand. Hisoka relaxed and let himself enjoy it.
“You’re ridiculous sometimes, Illumi. Killua would never let Nanika get used like that. What’s more, us having a child would most definitely harm people.” Hisoka mocked. Illumi left hand flexed on Hisoka’s throat.
“Look at your left hand, Hisoka.” Hisoka sighed and brought his left hand upwards so that he can look at it.
“What do you see?” Illumi questioned with a very apparent tone.
“My engagement ring.” Hisoka rolled his eyes, when Illumi mocked him, it felt like being scolded.
“Exactly.” Illumi looked at Hisoka’s ring for a second and continued: “I have never seen my mother unhappy in her marriage to my father in all of my years at the mansion. I have seen her hysterical but never unhappy. Father has always satisfied her wants and needs, which means as your husband I must do the same, no?” Hisoka was taken aback by what Illumi had told him. He was silent, looking at Illumi. Illumi placed both hands around Hisoka’s neck as he loomed over him, thick black hair falling around Hisoka’s head and effectively preventing him from seeing anything but Illumi’s face. Illumi searched his face for a while and then leaned over to Hisoka’s ear.
“If a child is what you want, then we will have one.” Illumi missed the shock on Hisoka’s face but it was gone as soon as it came. Illumi was kissing him now and he couldn’t think about anything else.
Illumi was kissing him slowly but eventually he moved from his mouth down to his chin and his throat, down his torso until Hisoka’s waistband was in his way for the second time today. Illumi removed them in an instant along with his own clothes and by the time he was done Hisoka was already handing him a bottle of lube.
Hisoka was looking at Illumi as he was positioning himself between his spread legs. Hisoka desperately wanted Illumi to hurry up but he knew even begging wouldn’t spur him on. Illumi was taking his time purely for Hisoka’s torment and all Hisoka could do was watch Illumi stoke himself.
Suddenly, Illumi grabbed Hisoka’s hips and forced them together with his own.
“This will hurt.” Illumi acknowledged.
“Hurt me then.” Hisoka grinned back. It was all the permission Illumi needed as he slowly began sliding inside Hisoka. As soon as Hisoka felt the pain register, his hands shot out to claw at Illumi’s waist. When Illumi was fully inside him both men groaned.
Illumi loomed over Hisoka like a vulture. He began moving in a moderate pace.
“Fuck me.” Hisoka thought out loud, twitching, trying to pull Illumi closer and get him to move faster but Illumi was deliberately slowing the pace and it was driving Hisoka mad mostly because Illumi knew his husband liked a faster pace and had very little patience when it came to sex and pleasure.
Illumi was fucking him slowly for some time until he noticed Hisoka had become calmer and more obedient. Small moans escaped Hisoka’s lips as he looked at Illumi almost embarrassed under his gaze. Illumi liked looking at Hisoka like this, under him, moaning for him and because of him.
Without warning, Illumi suddenly slammed into Hisoka. A startled moan coming out of Hisoka, his legs instinctively twitched, spreading further to accommodate for Illumi’s cock inside of him. The change of pace was now making Hisoka moan consistently.
“Harder, Illumi, please.” Hisoka managed between moans but Illumi wouldn’t comply. This was enough to make Hisoka come, thought Illumi. The dark-haired man leaned over his lover. They were kissing again, Hisoka smiled against Illumi’s lips when he heard Illumi moaning and panting above him. Not even Illumi’s perfect façade was immune to pleasure and Hisoka enjoyed seeing that part of him, enjoyed seeing Illumi Zoldyck fuck him into the mattress like an animal in heat. Hisoka knew he wouldn’t last much longer like this.
“Hisoka...” Illumi moaned his name quietly above him. His left had dragged over Hisoka’s neck once more, fingers flexing around it so that he could hold it gently.
“Hisoka, can I-”
“Please, Illumi.” Illumi understood. He forced himself upwards using Hisoka’s windpipe for support, choking Hisoka for a moment. He managed to take a breath after Illumi let go but it was short-lived. Illumi wrapped both his hands around Hisoka’s throat and used that to hold himself above Hisoka and pound into him relentlessly.
Where before Hisoka was experiencing mild suffocation, now Illumi was actually choking his pink-haired husband. At first it was just an inability to breathe but soon it evolved into Hisoka’s body desperately trying to take in air and because of the vice-like grip Illumi had on his neck Hisoka was struggling to swallow which meant that if Illumi didn’t let go soon Hisoka would aspirate and likely pass out. Or die. One or the other.
Hisoka couldn’t wait for Illumi anymore, he’d been fighting off his orgasm for minutes now. He came under Illumi all the while trying to moan his lover's name. Illumi wasn’t done yet, continuing to please and choke Hisoka at the same time. Hisoka enjoyed the show in front of him: Illumi brutalising him for his own pleasure.
Moments later Illumi came inside of Hisoka. As soon as he realised, he let go of Hisoka’s neck. Hisoka couldn’t fight his natural instincts anymore, when Illumi had let go of him his body reacted before he could stop it. Hisoka sat up as if that would help him breathe in more air. Illumi’s arms wrapped around Hisoka’s shoulders, pulling him closer until they were forehead to forehead. Both of them were breathing heavily, Hisoka felt Illumi’s right hand cup his face.
“Breathe, Hisoka.” Illumi instructed needlessly, concern showing on his face. Hisoka leaned into Illumi’s touch, ginning.
“I’m alright.” Hisoka waved him off. He felt mildly sick from the lack of air but he would be fine in time.
Illumi looked dead into Hisoka’s eyes. “Stay. I will get us a towel.”
Fifteen minutes later and at the sacrifice of a cotton towel the young couple were clean and ready to finally call it a night.
Hisoka lay down with Illumi sprawled on top of him, his head on the magician’s chest, listening to his heartbeat. Illumi’s eyes were closed, wasn’t asleep but he was tired. Hisoka was playing with his hair and stroking his head as they relaxed.
Hisoka grinned as he spoke.
“You know, you never actually told me if you want to have a child with me or not.”
Illumi looked up lazily at his spouse.
“Must I say everything explicitly?” Illumi did not understand where Hisoka found the strength to be annoying even right before falling asleep. Hisoka knew very well there was no need. Illumi was exceptional at declining things he didn’t want or like.
Hisoka dragged Illumi upwards to kiss him goodnight. “No, but I’d have liked to hear it.” Hisoka spoke as Illumi rolled off of him and turned his back towards Hisoka so that the magician could spoon him. Hisoka pulled Illumi towards him tightly, mumbling “sweet dreams” to him before he dozed off.
Illumi stared at the darkness of the room for some time.
The child would need a name.