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Iwaizumi Hajime was never really fond of his high school, he’d just moved here this year and even after getting a girlfriend and decent enough grades, he wasn’t too friendly with the people around him. He hadn’t found any really good friends and spent most of his time alone. Iwaizumi was reserved, he didn’t talk much in class and only spent time with his girlfriend whom he’d conveniently met on his first day here.
This was his senior year and moving to a new school right before graduation wasn’t exactly his intention but he had to make do with what his parents asked of him. They both got new jobs and moving here was just more convenient for both of them.
Iwaizumi used to have a pretty standard high school friend group. A bunch of guys, they each played sports - Iwaizumi particularly enjoyed volleyball - and though he was quiet, he fit in. He didn’t like people who were overly expressive, always yelling in the hallways or wearing outrageous clothes, it just wasn’t his type of people. There’s one group in particular that Iwaizumi was not fond of, the blue-haired, septum piercing friend group. He doesn’t know any of their names but every time they meet at lunch or in class they just don’t shut up.
This is what Iwaizumi thinks while walking to class, he knows he shouldn’t judge people, but it was just so easy. It was the second semester and in a few months, he wouldn’t have to see any of them ever again.
Iwaizumi walked into his first period. The new semester had just started and after finishing most of his credits early, he decided to take a film class. He knew he loved watching movies and he heard that’s basically what they do in this class so it seemed like a good filler.
The first class was definitely not what Iwaizumi expected, they were already instructed to make a short film since “the best way to learn is to do it yourself” or whatever the teacher said before assigning partners. Iwaizumi didn’t know a lot of the people in this class and had no idea how to even start making a film so he sat and waited for his partner to sit next to him whenever he was ready.
“Hi, I’m Oikawa Tooru.” Someone said, pulling the chair next to Iwaizumi and taking a seat, “I’m pretty sure we’re partners, you’re Iwaizumi Hajime right?” The latter finally turned his head at the mention of his name. God fucking damn it, it was one of the quirky kids.
“Yeah, that's me.” He replied, going back to scribble at his notebook as the teacher explained the task: a short 3-4 minute skit of any genre, featuring at least 1 actor. Well, definitely not a film but call it what you like.
Oikawa did most of the brainstorming, and Iwaizumi mostly listened in. He knew Oikawa was talkative with his friends since he can usually hear the other boy across the cafeteria, but he did not expect him to be just as talkative with a complete stranger.
In a lot of ways, they were complete opposites, but after hearing Oikawa go on and on about his passion for film, Iwaizumi thinks he gets it. Oikawa has heart, he has passion, and most of all he cares. When Iwaizumi is quiet for too long Oikawa asks him if he’s okay. Before writing down an idea he asks Iwaizumi what he thinks. He’s annoying on the outside but he’s a nice guy.
Later that week they start on their short film, Oikawa convinces Iwaizumi to use one of Oikawa’s friends as the actress as they went off their horribly executed script. It was more fun than Iwaizumi would like to admit. Iwaizumi was reserved at first but Oikawa was funny and so were his friends. They aren’t the type of people Iwaizumi ever saw himself with, but he had to admit, he had a lot of fun.
---
After hours of figuring out how to use the first free editing software they found, the film was complete. The audio was a bit scuffed in places but it was good enough.
Later that day an email from their teacher came: one-week extension.
Oikawa texted Iwaizumi later that day.
Oikawa: did u see the extension lmao
Iwaizumi: yeah
Oikawa: cant believe we couldve spent a whole other week working on it
Iwaizumi: ikr
Iwaizumi looked down at his phone for a minute before typing again.
Iwaizumi: i mean we could reflim a couple of scenes
Iwaizumi felt his ears heat up.
He ignored it.
Oikawa: yeah! im free tmrw after 4th, i have frees the second half of the day :)
Iwaizumi smiled,
Iwaizumi: cool, i’ll meet you by the gate
---
Oikawa suggested that they went to his house to re-film some stuff. But when Iwaizumi saw Mario Kart on the coffee table all their school work plans went out the window. The two immediately started competing. It was fun. The competition was close but after the 1st place to 2nd place victory, Oikawa won.
The week-long extension was filled with video game nights and movie marathons. Iwaizumi had to admit that their last two weeks were fun, more fun than he’s had in a while.
The two bonded over games and started spending more and more time together, meeting up in between classes, watching movies every weekend, and eventually, Iwaizumi was able to accept that maybe he was wrong, Oikawa and his friends aren’t that bad.
---
Oikawa never mentioned his sexuality, ever since becoming friends with Iwaizumi he’s gotten many warnings from his friends: “he goes to church like every weekend and he definitely hates gay people.”
Oikawa didn’t really care, the one time they talked about anything remotely relationship based was when Iwaizumi got a call from his girlfriend. The boy then asked Oikawa if he had a girlfriend, when the latter said no Iwaizumi dropped the subject.
The two boys got drunk for the first time together on a Friday after school. Oikawa’s parents were out and the two decided to watch a movie and play a drinking game every time the main character makes a pop culture reference, take a drink. It was clear this was a bad idea from the start but Iwaizumi had never really gotten drunk before and he felt Oikawa was a safe enough person to do it with.
That night was one of the first nights they really talked. They talked about Iwaizumi moving, their first impressions and eventually their first relationships. Iwaizumi thought he would feel weird sleeping over at a gay guy's house and talking about relationships with him but he didn’t. Iwaizumi talked about how he met his girlfriend and Oikawa talked about coming out and his past short-term boyfriends. It was a long night with lots of alcohol, but genuinely fun.
---
The next week Iwaizumi’s mom asked Iwaizumi a funny question: “I don’t want you to take this the wrong way but, are you and that Oikawa boy dating? You spend so much time together and, I don't know, you just look so happy-” Iwaizumi cut her off, “no, we’re not dating mom.” He said, spooning the last bit of cereal into his mouth. He didn’t want his mom to think he was upset with her so he hugged her goodbye and took the comment as a joke. It’s not like it's weird for two guys to hang out a lot, that’s what best friends do.
So does that mean Oikawa is Iwaizumi’s best friend?
He had to think on that one.
It was finally time for Iwaizumi and Oikawa to present their project, and lord it was horrible. The two went completely off-script. The cast consisted of Oikawa’s friends and a short Iwaizumi cameo. They knew their grade would be horrific but they couldn’t help but laugh at their monster as it was shown to the entire class.
Later that day when the two were walking to lunch Iwaizumi told Oikawa what his mom asked him earlier, “Isn’t that hilarious?”
Oikawa laughed along, it seemed he took it as much of a joke as Iwaizumi did that morning. Iwaizumi was glad he didn’t think it was weird.
---
Oikawa did not take it as a joke. He actually started overthinking every action of his for the rest of the day. Thinking if he was walking too close, talking too much, doing too much. This was not what Oikawa wanted to hear halfway through the day.
At lunchtime Oikawa had made the mistake of walking in on the boys basketball team. He had found a volleyball outside and decided to go into the gym to return it. The only problem is, there’s practice. Basketball practice. Duche-ball practice.
“Hi Oikawa~” one of the boys teased, Oikawa rolled his eyes and started the walk across the gym.
“Little Tooru came to watch all the hot guys in their sweaty uniforms.” Some other random who Oikawa once knew from middle school called out.
“You don’t get to call me that,” Oikawa said, dropping the ball into the rack with the rest of the volleyball equipment. “We aren’t friends. Keep my name out of your mouth.” Oikawa deadpanned, walking out of the gym, this was too much to think about.
---
That afternoon the boys decided to go bowling with Oikawa’s friend group. Iwaizumi had gotten used to their presence now, they were able to joke together and Iwaizumi didn’t feel judged, or trapped - as he did with some of his old friends.
Iwaizumi joked with Oikawa like usual, pushing him over, calling him funny names, and bragging every time he would get a higher score than the other boy. Every time Iwaizumi would smack Oikawa’s shoulder, or put his hand on the latter's knee - things the boys did often - he felt as if his hand was on fire. Weird.
And every time Iwaizumi would touch poor Oikawa, the latter's heart would race, ears turning red as his mind over-processed every action the other boy would do.
Eventually, Oikawa and Iwaizumi decided to go grab more fries and drinks for the rest of the group. “Hey, Oikawa.” Iwaizumi started, Oikawa looking over, heart racing as he imagined everything the boy could say right now.
“I, um, I overheard some of the stuff said in the gym today.” Oh, so it’s that.
“Don’t worry about it, they’re just being obnoxious as always,” Oikawa said, the two leaning on the pick-up area station.
Iwaizumi was quiet for a second like he was hesitating to say something, “Do you not like when people call you by your first name?” Iwaizumi admitted.
Oikawa looked over, Iwaizumi wasn’t looking at him, “I guess… Tooru is for the people that know me,” he said, “like really know me.”
Iwaizumi is confused but none of Oikawa’s other friends call him Tooru so he assumed he shouldn’t either, “Oikawa is this.” He said, motioning to his body. “Tooru is this.” He said pointing at his chest.
“Are you sure you’re not high right now?” Iwaizumi joked, the conversation getting a bit too philosophical for him, “Or drunk?”
“Shut up.” Oikawa rolled his eyes, slapping Iwaizumi’s shoulder as the food finally arrived.
---
People say that the best way to deal with confusing feelings is to drink them away and forget. Well, no one actually says this, but Oikawa wants to convince himself that's good advice. So that’s what he did, “Hey Iwaizumi, wanna get drunk?” Oikawa asked, turning to Iwaizumi as the two biked to Iwaizumi’s house.
“Um.. yeah.” Iwaizumi replied. Of course, he wanted to get drunk, his parents aren’t home and he’s already got a boat load of movies ready to watch. The two grabbed some liquor from the single store they know doesn’t ID them and headed home with the bottles still clinking in their backpacks.
The boys get home and make sure Iwaizumi’s parents are really not home. They aren’t so they head upstairs. They set up their drink station and put on a movie. They do as usual, make up a game to play during the movie, and take shots throughout the game. It was a friday night so might as well get wasted, right?
“No way you’re making me watch Deadpool.” Iwaizumi rolled his eyes as Oikawa jumped back into bed, the two sharing Iwaizumi’s twin as they watched the TV Iwaizimi had recently bought. “No pleaseee it’s sooo funny, especially when you’re drunkkkk.” Oikawa begged.
“Fine,” Iwaizumi countered, the two basically slurring words together now as they started the movie, laughing at almost everything that came on the screen. “God Ryan Renold’s is so fucking hot,” Oikawa muttered, taking another messy sip of his liquor concoction.
Iwaizumi laughed over at Oikawa, looking down at the boy whose head was basically resting on his shoulder now. “I guess.” He muttered, looking back at the screen.
“C’monnn you can say Ryan Reynolds is hot without being gay.” Oikawa sighed.
“Yeah, I know.” Iwaizumi said, his heart starting to beat a little bit faster.
“Ok then just say it.” Oikawa laughed, sitting up and looking directly at Iwaizumi. God, they were so drunk.
Iwaizumi stared at Oikawa for a second, the boy looking at Iwaizumi like a begging puppy. “Fineeee. Ok, Ryan Renolds is hot.” Iwaizumi gave in.
Oikawa burst out smiling and quickly laid back down on Iwaizumi’s shoulder, “yeah I know.” He said, still smiling, feeling his eyes come to a close.
---
If Iwaizumi had to be honest, he was still thinking about what his mom said. I mean if she thought the two of them were dating, do more people think that too? Surely not, I mean Iwaizumi had a girlfriend for christ's sake. Sure he hadn’t seen her in a few days, or weeks. But they still text… sometimes. To be fair his girlfriend was a junior and he was a senior, so their schedules don’t match, plus she goes to another school. Ok, maybe it's time to text her.
Iwa: hey, do u wanna meet up this week?
Ichika (gf): uhhh sure?
Iwa: cool, does friday work?
Ichika (gf): sure
Iwa: ok cya then
Iwazumi was excited about his date, he hadn’t met up with Ichika in a long time so he wanted to make sure he did it right.
Oikawa, however, didn’t immediately recognize the series of 5 texts as “we planned a date”.
“Look Iwa, I'm going to be very honest, but you sound like a dick while texting,” Oikawa said, passing the other boy's phone to the next person at their lunch table.
“Hey!” Iwaizumi exclaimed. He wasn’t a dick, he texts like a normal person that's all. He doesn’t use 100 emojis like Oikawa, he texts like a regular human. “Also, why is my phone being passed around the table?!”
The table laughed lightly as the phone was passed back to its owner, “ok well, where are you taking her?” Oikawa asked.
“That one fancy French place.” Iwaizumi said, looking down at his phone again.
“Ooh le vent d’armor.” Someone at the table filled in, “yeah that one.”
“Ooh, Iwaizumi is getting all fancy for his date.” Oikawa poked at him. The brunette rolled his eyes in response.
---
Iwaizumi had planned the reservation for 8 but decided to show up a bit early. He knew Ichika liked to be on time for things so he headed inside ahead of time. He briefly talked to the hostess who brought him over to his table, a small table with 2 seats on opposite sides, candle lighting, and far enough away from other people for it to feel private, but not far enough away where they would be excluded from the general public. This hostess knew how to do her job. Iwaizumi sat waiting for a bit, staring at the scene around him, dazing off at the different couples who also shared this date night with him. Eventually, Iwaizumi felt a buzz on the table, he picked up his phone to look at the text.
Oikawa: soooooo :] hows the date goin?
Iwaizumi: she’s still not here
Oikawa: oh
Oikawa: ummmm
Oikawa: im sry :(
Iwaizumi: ??
Oikawa: its like 8:30 dude
Iwaizumi looked at the digital numbers on the top of his screen, Oikawa was right.
Oikawa: shes probs just late :p
Iwaizumi knew that wasn’t the case.
Iwaizumi: shes never really late
Oikawa: uhhhhhhhh
Iwaizumi: i was just stood up wasn’t i?
Oikawa started typing but Iwaizumi couldn’t bare to look at the boys answer. He quickly opened up his texts with Ichika.
Iwaizumi: ?
Ichika: its not working out
Ichika: sry i wont make it
Iwaizumi: are you seriously breaking up with me through text?
Ichika: sorry hajime
Iwaizumi hated that she used his first name. No one calls him Hajime. Only his family. He’s pretty sure most of his friends didn’t even bother enough to ask him what his first name was. Ichika had no right to call him that.
He put his phone down and took a sip of his water. He ignored the buzzing for a bit until it got a bit unbearable.
Oikawa: r u ok?
Oikawa: iwaizumi?
Oikawa: iwaaaa???
Oikawa: oh she probably just got there ok ill shut up
Oikawa: oh nvm she just posted on her story
Oikawa: im sry
Oikawa: ik it sucks :/
Oikawa: u can come over if u want!
Oikawa: we can watch ur favorite movie :]
Oikawa: and eat a bunch of snacks
Oikawa: or just get really drunk
Oikawa: i can find us a party to go to!
Oikawa: maybe you don’t want a party actually nvm
Oikawa: ok ill be here if you need anything :]
Iwaizumi sighed as he read the messages, it had only been 20 seconds since the last one popped up. He read through the messages again. Reading and rereading until his brain could decide on what to respond.
Iwaizumi: i still have a 2 person reservation
He put his phone down. What was he doing? This is a romantic restaurant. He can’t come here with his friend. That’s so awkward. Oikawa is going to think he’s so weird. Iwaizumi just lost his only friend. It’s all over.
Oikawa: im omw B)
It’s fine. Iwaizumi’s fine. Oikawa didn’t think it was weird. And based on the sunglasses emoji he sent he definitely didn’t think of this as an out-of-nowhere date thing.
Iwaizumi put his phone down and started waiting. It would probably take ages for Oikawa to get here, he should’ve just suggested they meet somewhere else.
“Right here.”
Iwaizumi looked up, seeing Oikawa smiling over at him - clearly underdressed for this restaurant's formality. “This place is so nice.” He whisper-shouted as he sat down across from Iwaizumi.
Iwaizumi looked around for a waiter as Oikawa looked down at the menu. Oikawa didn’t know any french and planned on just ordering the second cheapest item on the menu but he needed a way to hide the obnoxiously red tone of his face. Oikawa knew this wasn’t a date. Iwaizumi is straight and Oikawa is just here to make his friend feel better about his ex-girlfriend. But god Iwaizumi just looked so good in a suit. And the candle lighting is just perfect. Oikawa had to hold himself together for the sake of their friendship, and his dignity.
---
The dinner went better than planned. They both had good food, got offered free champagne with no ID, and no one questioned the two boys sitting together. They walked out giggling about their dinner, half-finished bottle of champagne in hand, and ready to head home. Iwaizumi offered to let Oikawa sleep over since his house was closer and the boy happily accepted. They walked back home relatively quickly for two tipsy boys.
Once at Iwaizumi’s, the two headed upstairs and into Iwaizumi’s room. It was pretty messy but that was its idle state so Oikawa didn’t think anything of it. It was a lot quieter in Iwaizumi’s house than in the outside world. Oikawa looked around the room for a bit as Iwaizumi sat down on his bed. Oikawa gazed at the pictures of Iwaizumi when he was younger. He didn’t know Iwaizumi played volleyball.
“Thanks for hanging out with me tonight.” Iwaizumi broke the silence. Oikawa turned to face him, the brunette looking down at his feet by the bed.
“Of course,” Oikawa replied, watching as Iwaizumi took off his shoes. Oikawa walked over to Iwaizumi, “You didn’t have to come,” Iwaizumi said as Oikawa sat beside him, “But I’m glad you did.” He finished, finally looking up at Oikawa. Iwaizumi’s eyes were a dark mix of greens and browns. Oikawa has never truly looked at Iwaizumi. His eyes - how they curved upwards; his nose - how it pointed out just slightly; and his lips - how they sat just a smidge open. Oikawa couldn’t stop his eyes from wandering, from his eyes, to his nose, to his lips, his jaw, to his shoulders and chest. All before connecting eyes with the boy once again. Iwaizumi had not once stopped watching Oikawa; seeing as the boy's eyes moved down, only to meet back up on his own until dropping once again to Iwaizumi’s lips. No words were exchanged as Oikawa leaned in, slowly connecting the two boys' lips. It was sparse, the contact waking up Oikawa from his trance, the latter pulling away quickly.
“I’m sorry.” Oikawa spat out. Standing up urgently and moving toward the door. “I didn’t mean to-” Iwaizumi stood up after him, running to catch him before Oikawa could open the door. “Wait-” he called out, taking hold of Oikawa’s wrist, the latter looking back at Iwaizumi. The two avoided eye contact, both redder than red but refusing to acknowledge it.
“You… um… you can still sleepover… um… if you want.” Iwaizumi said, dropping the taller boy's hand. Oikawa was finally able to take a breath. The two slept in separate beds, not talking much after what had just happened - they were drunk and it was almost 2am anyway - time to sleep.
---
“Good morning.” Iwaizumi said, looking over to Oikawa as the latter stretched out his slumber. “My head hurts soooo much.” Oikawa complained.
“Same.” Iwaizumi said dryly, looking back at his phone, scrolling through his Instagram feed.
“Do you… uh… remember anything from last night?” Oikawa asked, looking over to Iwaizumi, the brunette still staring at his phone, taking a moment to think before replying. “No.” Oikawa felt the butterflies in his stomach drop.
Iwaizumi was lying. He did remember. But it was too much for him right now. He didn’t bother to ask if Oikawa remembered. Iwa knew he was lying to himself and Oikawa, but he didn’t want to know if Oikawa would do the same.
Oikawa went home pretty early that Saturday, talking of his little sister's upcoming play and how she still needed help with lines. Iwaizumi didn’t press on, the two said goodbye to each other like nothing happened. Seems everything is okay.
--
Spring break was a week away, 5 more days of studying and end-of-semester exams and then they were free. Free for 2 weeks before eventually returning to this hell-hole. Oikawa spent this last week doing exactly what you would expect of any senior this late in the year: watching movies, getting drunk on Tuesdays, and staying out late.
In school, Oikawa tried to hide his anxiety about Iwaizumi and he felt as if he’d done pretty well. And little to Oikawa’s knowledge, Iwaizumi had been doing the same. The two basically spent their whole time together so it was no surprise that when Oikawa got invited to the first Spring Break party, Iwaizumi did as well.
“I can’t gooooo.” Oikawa muttered, walking over to their lunch table.
“Why not?” Iwaizumi asked. “I have my sisters play.” Oikawa deadpanned.
Iwaizumi groaned, “okay well I’m still going.”
“Yes! You should go!” Oikawa exclaimed, “You barely go to parties, this is going to be so much fun!”
“That sounded like a very backhanded statement but I’ll ignore it.” Iwaizumi said, not in the mood to argue or feed into Oikawa’s toying.
---
Iwaizumi had to admit that he would’ve preferred if Oikawa was with him. Oikawa always knows what to do in social situations even if he’s a bit awkward sometimes. Oikawa had been invited to numerous parties in the past and definitely knew what to do - unlike Iwaizumi.
He just wasn’t really used to parties. He’d gone to a few here and there between his old schools but he never really stayed for long. It was his senior year and he might as well have fun at a party and let loose. He didn’t really know anyone when he got there but got used to it all pretty fast.
There were the popular girls dancing, some guys playing beer pong, people making out, stoners outside; Iwaizumi felt like he was watching a movie.
“Hey! Do you want to grab a drink?” He heard someone call behind him, he turned to face a petite girl with a red cup in hand, she had her hair in pigtails and was wearing a bralette with some shorts. Iwaizumi took a second to take it all in before replying, “yeah sure.” She took him by the arm and pulled him over to the kitchen where bottles on bottles of liquor stood in his view. Time for a little bit of substance abuse.
Iwaizumi drank a lot. And he knew he did when he found himself playing beer-pong and high-fiving people he’d never seen in his life. He didn’t know what happened to the girl but by the time she came back to him, he struggled to even remember if she told him her name.
“Hey!” She called out again, Iwaizumi bending down a smidge in order to hear her over the music. “My friend over there thinks you’re cute!” She said through all the noise, using her thumb to point behind her. Iwaizumi took a glance behind her, still not sure of who she was talking about in the middle of the crowd.
“He’s over there with the blue cup!” She said, pulling him down by his shoulder to yell into his ear. Iwaizumi looked over to what he assumed was the boy she was talking about. He was thin and wore tight clothing, with colored glasses and indeed, the blue cup in hand.
Wait. What was he doing? Did he just check out a guy? He was too drunk. Time to go home. Time to get the fuck out.
“Sorry, I’m uh… not interested at the moment… sorry.” He quickly muttered to the girl, pulling out his phone and immediately texting his top contact.
Iwaizumi: pls pick me up
Oikawa: what happened :(
Oikawa: r u ok?
Iwaizumi: i am
Iwaizumi: very super duper drunk
Iwaizumi: can u come get meeeee
Iwaizumi texted slowly as he exited the house, not saying goodbye to a single soul and just walking out to the empty street. His brain was too slow to register what time it was, he just knew he can’t get hit by a car - so time to move to the sidewalk - and he needs to go the fuck to bed. He sat outside the house staring at his shoes and the pavement, mind blanking at the sight of his converse.
Suddenly he heard his phone ring. “Hello?”
“Iwa I’m around the corner, I borrowed my mom's car I hope she doesn’t notice.” It was Oikawa. That felt very fast. Iwaizumi stood up and made his way over to the only car he saw on the street.
“Iwa!” Oikawa called, running around the back the car to meet Iwaizumi, who instantly fell into Oikawa’s arms when the taller boy got close enough. “Can we go home?” Iwaizumi asked, his words muffled along Oikawa’s shoulder blade. This was the first time the two had hugged, shame it had to be under these circumstances
“Yeah. Let’s go home.” Oikawa said, getting Iwaizumi in the car and then getting in the driver’s seat as well.
“I thought you didn’t know how to drive.” Iwaizumi muttered.
“I just don’t have my license,” Oikawa replied, looking over to check on Iwaizumi every few seconds.
“Oh okay.” Iwaizumi said, shortly cutting himself off. “How was the play?” He asked.
“Really good.” Oikawa smiled, looking over at Iwaizumi again. Does Oikawa always do this? Or is Iwaizumi overthinking because he’s drunk. “Thanks for asking.”
“No problem,” Iwaizumi said, turning to face the window, his words slow and slurred, “I like asking. You’re a fun person to know about.” He said, the words spewing out with no end.
Oikawa stayed quiet for the rest of the drive. It wasn’t an uncomfortable silence, it felt nice with the windows down and music fading into the wind.
Once at Oikawa’s house the latter helped Iwaizumi out of the car and into the house. Oikawa’s parents were asleep so they had to be quiet. Oikawa helped Iwaizumi take his shoes off and then the two walked the steps slowly. Oikawa helped Iwaizumi to bed and under the blankets. The night was silent, no more music, no more yelling, no more beer pong, and finally, quiet.
Iwaizumi felt his eyes getting heavy, looking over at Oikawa as the boy took a seat on the edge of the bed. Oikawa looked down at his hands and took a deep breath, calming himself to some degree.
“Thanks, Tooru.” Iwaizumi said lightly, Oikawa turning his head at the mention of his first name. Iwaizumi has never called him that. “I wish I could kiss you again.” Iwaizumi muttered, pulling his blanket up and turning to finally close his eyes. Oikawa sat speechless. He said he forgot. He didn’t forget.
Oikawa sighed and pulled the rest of the blanket up for his best friend before turning off all the lights and laying down on the floor to sleep.
---
The next morning Iwaizumi wakes up with a horrible headache. He’s not surprised, just disappointed. He takes a minute to gather his thoughts, like figuring out why he’s at Oikawa’s house and how he got here in the first place. He eventually gets enough energy to stand up and head downstairs. The house was oddly quiet for a Saturday morning but it was all explained when Iwaizumi reached the living room. Oikawa was sitting at the kitchen table with a bowl of cereal and a spoon in hand.
“My parents took my sister to soccer practice.” He said, taking a glance at Iwaizumi. He looked like shit. Iwaizumi headed over to the table, taking a seat opposite his friend and grabbing the cereal and milk. “I’m so hungover.” Iwaizumi said, feeling the need to break the silence. Oikawa didn’t reciprocate. They sat in silence and ate for what felt like ages to Iwaizumi before Oikawa finally spoke up. “Do you remember anything from yesterday?” Oikawa asked.
Iwaizumi stopped shoveling food in his mouth for a second to reply, “Not really. I can’t really remember a lot when I get drunk.” He said sheepishly, Oikawa now putting his spoon down. “We both know that’s not true.” He said, taking his plate and putting it in the sink. He stood there for a bit, deciding what to do.
Iwaizumi knew exactly what Oikawa meant. He didn’t know how Oikawa found out he lied, but he did. Oikawa was waiting for an answer and Iwaizumi didn’t have the courage to reply. Without a word shared, Oikawa headed up to his room, leaving Iwaizumi to his food.
---
Oikawa sat in his room for a couple of minutes, pulling out an unfinished manga of his and deciding whether he had the spirit to finally finish it or not. Oikawa then hears a soft knock on the door and turns to see Iwaizumi pushing past the wooden frame.
“I’m sorry Oikawa.” He said. Oikawa still didn’t know how to respond, he waited for an answer to come but it didn’t. Iwaizumi took a breath before finally moving to where Oikawa was, taking a seat at the edge of the bed, avoiding eye contact like his life depended on it. “I’m sorry I lied to you. I didn’t mean to hurt you, I just didn’t know what to do. I remember that day.” He blurted out, “I remember the night you kissed me.” He finished, Oikawa now facing Iwaizumi, the latter still looking down at his hands; his body felt like it was on fire and his stomach felt cold with butterflies.
“Do you really not remember anything from yesterday?” Oikawa asked. Iwaizumi shook his head no, “Do you not remember what you said to me?”
Iwaizumi shook his head no once again, his voice feeling too far away to grab a hold of. “You said, ‘I wish I could kiss you again.’” Oikawa finished, slowly letting his body lay back on the bed, his eyes staring at his ceiling as Iwaizumi’s mind raced.
Oikawa took a deep breath, getting himself ready to deflect with a joke or say something witty enough to change the subject as Iwaizumi interrupted. “I do,” he said. Oikawa turned to face where Iwaizumi was, the other boy now looking at Oikawa. He sat up, Iwaizumi pulling away from eye contact as Oikawa faced him, “I do wish I could kiss you again.” Iwaizumi said, turning to look at Oikawa. “Then why don’t you?” Oikawa said. Iwaizumi was - for the first time - speechless, his eyes traveled down the pale boy's face until stopping at his lips. Iwaizumi looked back up at Oikawa’s eyes once again, taking the moment to watch as the swirls of brown melted in front of him; Iwaizumi taking Oikawa’s face into his hand, the skin soft along Iwaizumi’s calloused hands from his volleyball days. Iwaizumi closed his eyes and moved in, their kiss short and tender, Iwaizumi pulling away to catch his breath - somehow just noticing he’d been holding it this whole time. The two boys looked at each other, chests rising in sync as they both needed to catch their breath, all before Iwaizumi leaned back in, Oikawa reciprocating the kiss. It was harsher than the first one, both boys feeling their bodies catch on fire as their lips connected.
Oikawa pulled away slightly, “Iwaizumi Hajime, I really like you.” he whispered into Iwaizumi’s hand. Iwaizumi pushed Oikawa's gaze back to his before whispering back. “Tooru.” He said, the taller boy melting at Iwaizumi’s touch, “can I call you that?,” he said, his heart racing as the words finally left Iwaizumi’s mouth, Oikawa nodding yes. “I’ve never felt things like this,.” Oikawa broke into a slow and soft smile “I think I like you too. Like more than a friend… obviously.” Oikawa let out a small quiet laugh, pulling Iwaizumi into a hug. They both giggled lightly as they fell on their sides on the bed, kissing as the sunlight beamed through the half open curtains.
----
It was spring break. The next few days, the two boys spent almost the whole time together. All until the arrival of Aoi Arata. Aoi was an old friend of Iwaizumi’s from his old school. His mom thought it would be a good idea to surprise him, so when Iwaizumi opened the door to see that large familiar frame, his heart dropped almost as fast as the hand holding Oikawa’s.
“Iwa! What’s up!” He greeted Iwaizumi with a stiff and awkward hug. “Hi, um,” Iwaizumi didn’t know how to respond. He’d changed a lot since his last school but Aoi doesn’t seem the same way. “Hi, Aoi.” Iwaizumi said, pushed away from the hug by the larger boy. “Um this is Oikawa,” Iwaizumi introduced, turning around to Oikawa who - despite being nearly the same height as Aoi, looked small and terrified. “Hi Oikawa.” He greeted, Oikawa quickly snapping back into character. “Hi!” He greeted back.
“I um, I didn’t know you were coming to visit.” Iwaizumi admitted. His mom walked in frame from behind Aoi.
“His mom reached out saying that you might be missing some of your old high school friends!” She said, her always friendly smile still evident on her face as she turned to go back into the living space.
“Oh, that’s nice!” Iwaizumi said, turning to give a sheepish smile over to Oikawa, who seemed to get the hint.
“Oh right! I forgot I um, I need to take my sister for a walk. I’ll see you later!” Oikawa said, yelling out the last half as he ran across the yard back to the street, Iwaizumi giving him an SOS look as the boy continued running off. Oikawa was long gone down the street by the time Iwaizumi turned to face Aoi.
“Who’s that fag you’re hanging out with?” He asked. Iwaizumi’s breath hitching in his throat. “You, um, you shouldn’t…” Iwaizumi felt his voice drift off. This is the type of person Aoi was, a brain dead jock whose privilege guides him through life.
“We need to get you some new friends IwaizumI!” Aoi chuckled, pulling Iwaizumi back into the house and putting his arm around him, using his loose hand to punch Iwaizumi’s arm lightly.
Iwaizumi wasn’t sure what to do with Aoi. The two watched a few movies and Aoi spent hours talking to Iwaizumi about all the girls he got with back at their old school. Iwaizumi let slip some information about a party the next day, Aoi insisting that the two have to go. For tonight they both slept on separate couches, Aoi falling asleep before Iwaizumi, the exhaustion from the traveling finally catching up.
Iwaizumi pulled out his phone.
Iwaizumi: sorry abt aoi, i didn’t know he was coming
Oikawa: its ok!
Iwaizumi: i would’ve rather spent the day with you
Oikawa: :] me too
Iwaizumi: i’ll see u at the party tmrw?
Oikawa: of course
Oikawa: i already have the perfect outfit picked out <3
Iwaizumi: you do?
Iwaizumi: do you want to show me?
Oikawa: im not getting up to change :PPPP
Iwaizumi: what’re you wearing now?
Oikawa: curious are we? ;)
Iwaizumi: maybe just a bit
Oikawa: sorry but you’ll have to wait till tmrw to see my beautiful face and body <3
Iwaizumi: lame :/
Oikawa: :P go to sleep loser
Oikawa: ill see u at the party :PPPPPPPP
Iwaizumi: gnn :)
---
Iwaizumi’s mother forced Iwaizumi to take Aoi. He really tried to get him to stay but of course, the party king has to party.
The function was hosted in the basement of some kids house, the rest of the house empty but “off-limits”. Iwaizumi felt his heart race as he arrived, it didn’t seem like a big party so leaving Aoi alone seemed harder and harder every step of the way.
Iwaizumi arrived and immediately found Oikawa with a few of his friends in the corner of the room, he was wearing a white collared shirt, the top few buttons unbuttoned with a loose tie around his neck. His hair was messy but then again it always was. He looked good. Iwaizumi took a deep breath and made his way over.
“Hey.” He said, Aoi somewhere behind him.
“Hi,” Oikawa replied, both boys smiling at each other. Their friends didn’t know about them so seeing each other around friends was a bit awkward.
Luckily Oikawa’s friends are just as talkative as him and quickly started a conversation with Iwaizumi. They handed him a drink and the group talked for a while before Iwaizumi remembered Aoi. He turned to check where the boy was, the taller boy's figure stood at the other side of the room, a group of people dancing blocking them from each other.
Iwaizumi could feel his eyes glaring at him. He avoided the eye contact and quickly turned back to his friends, all of them laughing at something Oikawa hasd said, not noticing Iwaizumi’s breath quickening. Iwaizumi turned around again to check where Aoi was. But before it hit him, the boy was right behind him. Pulling him away, Oikawa and his friends lagging at the sudden action.
Aoi pulled him to the side. Oikawa looked over worriedly, watching the two as they secluded themselves.
“Yo Iwaizumi! What’re you doing with those faggots over there?” Aoi confronted him, pushing him onto the wall. Oikawa tensed at the action, slowly moving away from his conversation and making his way over.
“What?” Iwaizumi called out, putting his arm up to stop the boy from pushing him closer to the wall.
“What are you, like gay now or something?” Aoi said, taking a step back and looking the boy up and down, disgusted.
“What? N.. No.” Iwaizumi fought back. He felt stinging behind his eyes and his throat closing up. He can’t cry. Not here.
“Yeah good. Hanging out with people like that will fuck you up.” Aoi said, pulling on Iwaizumi’s shoulder to lift him from the wall. He punched Iwaizumi’s arm jokingly. Iwaizumi still gathering himself together, eyes too afraid to look at Aoi.
Aoi pulled him back into the crowd, Iwaizumi looking up to see Oikawa. He stood alone, shocked and shaking his head. He looked away and walked into Iwaizumi, knocking his shoulder as he headed up the stairs, “fuck you Iwaizumi.” He muttered as he headed up, Iwaizumi turning to watch him leave.
Aoi pulled him to the dance floor where some girls were dancing, he handed Iwaizumi a drink and tried to get him to dance. The girls swarmed around them, Iwaizumi looking around as girls touched him and pushed him while dancing. Iwaizumi took another sip of whatever alcohol was in his cup. He tried grabbing hold of his breath but struggled. He was suffocated in an ocean of hair and skin, music blasting in his ears, the pulsing bass beating his heart for him.
Iwaizumi felt his eyes sting again, tears threatening to fall. His breathing was shallow and the room felt like it was spinning. He pushed past Aoi and the sea of girls, “Iwaizumi! Where are you going?” Aoi yelled as Iwaizumi made his way to the stairs. “To see my real friends, you asshole.” Iwaizumi yelled back over the music. Aoi’s face turned in confusion as Iwaizumi ran up the stairs and out the front door, “Oikawa!” He yelled. Seeing the other boy sitting in the grass, a red cup next to him.
“Oikawa I’m sorry.” Iwaizumi said, still catching his breath, slowly walking over to him.
“Yeah?” The other boy laughed, “Well I don’t wanna hear it.” He said, still not turning to Iwaizumi.
“I’m sick of just being some straight boys toy.” He said, tipping the rest of his drink into his mouth.
Iwaizumi made his way over to Oikawa. “You’re, you’re not,” Iwaizumi struggled to find the right words, “I fucked up.”
Oikawa was still looking away. “I was scared.” Iwaizumi said, taking a pause to form the right words and take a seat next to him, “I’ve never felt this way towards someone. Especially, um… a boy. I thought there was something wrong with me but you taught me otherwise. You don’t need to forgive me and I know this is a shitty apology but please, I really just… I really like you Oikawa. And I’m scared of losing you. And I shouldn’t care about Aoi, or anyone else, but I just, I got scared. I didn’t know what to say and I’m sorry.” Iwaizumi looked down after finishing.
Oikawa looked over to Iwaizumi, his hand moving from his side to lift Iwaizumi’s face to look at him. Oikawa could see the tears forming around Iwaizumi’s eyes, it made him want to cry too.
“I know.” He said, letting his hand down as Iwaizumi maintained eye contact. “I shouldn’t expect you to come out to anyone because of me. I’m sorry. Its not my place. I’m just…” Oikawa took a deep breath. “I just don’t want to be used by someone I love again.” He said.
“Tooru, I-”
“Yo Iwaizumi! What’re you doing?!” The two quickly turned to see Aoi. “Yo get away from him!?” Aoi shouted, running over to push Oikawa back. “Are you good?” He asked, pulling Iwaizumi off the floor.
Iwa looked down at Oikawa, who was leaning on his elbow to keep himself from falling on the grass.
“Yeah. Are you?” Iwaizumi said, turning to Aoi, and pushing him back. “What the fuck is wrong with you Iwaizumi?” Aoi called back, looking at the shorter boy defensively.
“Stay the fuck away from me. And my friends.” Iwaizumi replied, the boy chuckling.
“Oh I see how it is,” He said, looking Iwaizumi up and down. “Stay away or what huh? Your little boyfriend is gonna beat me up?” He questioned, grinning with a condescending tone.
“No, I will.” Iwaizumi replied, taking a step up before punching Aoi straight in the jaw, the boy falling to the floor from the unexpected hit.
“Iwa!” Oikawa yelled, getting up and pulling the boy away from Aoi.
“Don’t talk to me ever again.” Iwaizumi said, getting Oikawa off him and walking up to Aoi, looking down on him, “And find somewhere else to spend the night.” Iwaizumi turned to Oikawa and grabbed him by the wrist, pulling him into the house, leaving Aoi out on the grass.
“Holy shit.” Oikawa said, “Holy shit.” he repeated.
“Yeah. Holy shit.” Iwaizumi relayed, letting go of Oikawa’s arm and turning to face him.
“Holy shit.” Oikawa said, looking at Iwaizumi, the boy still revved up from that, “That was so hot.” He said, jaw open still in shock.
Iwaizumi laughed, “Next time you’re gonna punch someone like that you let me know, okay?.” Oikawa joked, tugging on Iwaizumi’s shirt as the boy faced him. Iwaizumi chuckled as he looked down, his tongue scraping the gap between his teeth, a habit Oikawa doesn’t think Iwa even knows he does. But it drives Oikawa crazy.
Iwaizumi looked up to meet Oikawa’s gaze. Moments like these are when Iwaizumi is reminded of Oikawa’s height. He didn’t notice at first but through time it becomes apparent; his perfect physique. His wide shoulders and slim waist, his long legs and fragile hands.
“Yeah, I’ll be sure to let you know.” Iwaizumi replied, tugging on Oikawa’s tie to bring their lips together. Iwaizumi pulled away an inch to where their foreheads were touching, grinning at the other boy. “You wore this just for me to do that didn’t you?” Iwaizumi whispered, tugging on the tie lightly.
“Shhh.” Oikawa shushed, grinning as he pulled them back into a kiss.