Chapter Text
It was finally over. That was the only thing that Steve could think of when he showered off that evening. The Upside Down was gone forever.
It had taken them a few months and a lot of planning, but it had actually worked. El had done it again with some help from the Party and the government. When the last traces of the Upside Down disappeared and El turned around, wiping her nose, Steve had suddenly felt like he was made of paper. The relief was almost crushing.
Now, he was struggling to stay upright in his shower, shampoo narrowly missing his eyes. He hadn’t slept more than a few hours at a time in weeks.He ran his hand over the still pink scars on his stomach and thought of the matching ones that Eddie had.
After the first fight with Vecna, he had carried Eddie through the trailer gate, Dustin sobbing at his side. It was too risky to take him to a hospital with cops crawling all over the place, so Steve had stolen medical supplies out of the back of a nearby ambulance, responding to the supposed earthquake.
That night, it had been touch and go, but Eddie had woken up the next morning in Steve’s bed, just long enough to give Steve a confused look before drifting off. They had agreed that it would be best for everyone to believe that Eddie was dead until they could prove him innocent. Dustin almost broke when he talked to Eddie’s uncle and Steve had wrapped an arm around the kid, parked in his driveway that evening. He didn’t complain as Dustin sobbed into his jacket for twenty minutes that Eddie was a ‘goddamn hero.’
The next month for Eddie had been spent rotating between Steve’s empty house and the Wheeler’s basement. Steve had been his nurse often enough, changing the dressing on his stomach and giving him updates on the group’s progress. They had joked about Eddie always getting the worst of everything, even when it came to Demobats.
Steve was sure there was something poetic in the way he shared scars with Eddie and Nancy shared scars with Jonathan, but whatever it was, he couldn’t sort it out. Maybe something about how they had both become Henderson’s older brother/father figure. Maybe something about the way Eddie would get the shivers any time the power flickered and Steve would curl up next to him on the couch, baseball bat in hand. Maybe it was having someone to spill his guts to about how much it fucking hurt to watch Nancy and Jonathan slot back into place, even if he was happy for them. And maybe it was even the way that Eddie’s dark eyes would linger on him before drifting off to sleep in the dim basement light. Maybe it was all of it, Steve just couldn’t sort it out.
Things slowly got back to normal, the way they always did. Construction ran rampant in Hawkins, which was helping the economy if nothing else. Steve was still employed at the Family Video, as was Robin, even though she would be taking off for college in a few months. She had decided to wait until the spring semester to start, wherever she ended up going. Her excuse had been that she wanted to save up money, but Steve had seen the still haunted look she would get sometimes, the way she would go quiet in the car or at work. None of them were ever going to be completely over what had happened, but it wasn’t so bad when they were close together.
The kids bounced back better than expected. Max’s eyesight wasn’t quite the same as it had been, but Steve had helped her pick out a pair of glasses that were, to quote Max, ‘kickass.’ Lucas, ever the good boyfriend, had complimented them until she had to tell him to shut it. Mike and El were very wrapped up in one another, to the point where even Steve was a little grossed out.
These days, he spent a lot of time with Will and Dustin, who each seemed to be dealing with their own personal turmoils. They all had dinner with Eddie once a week, Will having taken an instant liking to Eddie when the man was coherent enough to hold a conversation. Dustin was just having a hard time letting Eddie out of his sight.
“You know, he calls me every day, sometimes twice a day,” Eddie said, blowing smoke out of Steve’s open window. They were taking the backroads to the Munson family abode. The Munson’s trailer had been demolished by the government and now they were living in a rinkydink apartment, which was only better than the trailer because it didn’t have a gate to the Upside Down in the living room.
“Well, you did basically die in his arms. If it were me, I’d call you every day too,” Steve said as he flipped on his blinker. They turned onto a new road as Steve rotated the wheel with one hand and the cigarette smoke drifted to his side of the car.
“I’m just worried for him, Steve. What happens when I finally get out of this town or it’s time for Henderson to go to college and shit,” Eddie said, looking out the window. He had pulled his hair back to keep it from getting tangled in the wind and it made him look too young to be making a face like that.
“You plannin’ on leaving soon, Munson?” Steve asked. The idea of Eddie leaving filled him with some strange apprehension. He knew it was Eddie’s lifelong goal to escape from Hawkins in a blaze of rock and roll glory, but the idea of not seeing him regularly was nauseating. All that time holed up together the last few months had warped something in Steve, to the point where he felt antsy if he hadn't seen Eddie that day. He was honestly worse than Dustin, but he didn't have the excuse of a pseudo-brotherly relationship.
“I don’t know. I hate living here because it’s like a constant reminder, ya know? But there are things worth staying for,” he said, directing a pointed gaze at Steve. Steve swallowed, feeling his throat constrict a bit, and nodded.
“Yeah, I know,” he said, focusing on the road. There were fireflies along the creek bank up ahead and some part of Steve wanted to pull the car over and drag Eddie out into the field to see them.
“What about you? Still thinking about your six nugget dream?” Eddie said, his tone slightly teasing.
That had been something they had talked about at length during Eddie’s extended stay at his home. Nancy and Jonathan had sorted out their problems, publicly, loudly, and repeatedly. Each time it happened, Steve would sit in the Wheeler's basement with Eddie, rehashing all the reasons he was a bad match for Nancy and he was better off looking elsewhere for true love.
“All the time,” Steve chuckled, “It's been changing though. Like Nancy’s still there but it’s because she’s brought the whole Byers clan. And you and Robin and all the kids and everyone are there. I …I still want my own family, my own happily ever after, but I’m starting to think that needs to include the other people I consider family.”
“It doesn't always look like that white picket fence crap, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t family,” Eddie mused, flicking a cigarette butt out the window.
Steve had been the one to drop Eddie off when it was all over. The way that Wayne had openly sobbed, his hands gripping Eddie’s shoulders, made something twist up inside Steve. He was glad someone was there to look out for Eddie, but neither of his parents had ever held him like that, like they were so happy to see him that nothing else mattered. Steve had said an unheard goodbye and driven back to his own empty house.
The bar was crowded, filled with men, women, and more glitter than Steve had ever seen before. Robin and Eddie looked significantly more at home than Steve felt, but he was still a Harrington and could make himself sociable at any kind of party.
They were in Chicago to check out a college for Robin and had been able to convince her mother to let them spend the night at a hotel instead of driving back immediately. He still had no idea how they’d persuaded her that Steve Harrington, famous for sleeping with half the girls in Hawkins, had no intention of pursuing her baby girl. Dustin said it was because she sensed that Steve also had mom energy and Steve had given him an aggressive noogie for that.
Robin had narrowed it down to a few schools and this trip was supposed to be the deciding factor of where she would be going in the spring. She was supposed to have picked a school by graduation, but that was before…everything that happened. Nancy and Jonathan were currently at college themselves, otherwise they probably would have come too.
All of the older kids had gotten close in the last month, Eddie and Argyle slotting into the group surprisingly well. There had been lots of late nights spent drinking in Steve’s living room and driving the little brats around, just trying to distance themselves from Spring Break and what happened afterward.
If someone had told a sixteen year old Steve that he would be helping a band geek drive across the state to check out dorms with their mutual best friend, Eddie ‘The Freak’ Munson, he might have thought they were on drugs. But he had to admit that he was probably the happiest he’d ever been, between hosting D&D in his living room or the weekly lunches with Eddie and the boys. Even having to scold El and Mike for getting too touchy-feely next to the pool wasn’t so bad. The Harrington house had people in it more often than not these days and that hadn’t been the case since Steve was in middle school.
After the hours-long college tour, they had decided to explore the Chicago nightlife near their hotel. Steve had been to Chicago a few times, but only with his parents, who kept him on a very tight leash. Eddie on the other hand had been to the city for several concerts and knew his way around pretty well. He had said he knew about a good bar downtown that supposedly had fantastic live music.
“But it’s a gay bar, if you’re cool with that,” he had said, looking at Steve with searching eyes. Steve had shrugged and replied that was fine with him. Robin was over the moon to go somewhere that might have other lesbians.
That led to their current situation. Eddie and Steve were stuffed in a booth near the back of the bar, nursing beers while Eddie gave commentary on the live band. Robin had disappeared into the crowd some time ago, absolutely giddy with excitement.
Steve was spending his evening watching Eddie. It had become his main pastime these days. Eddie could be frenetic with theatrical energy one minute and then introspective and sullen the next. The moments that he cherished most were the ones when Eddie would go all quiet and they would just look at each other, as if they had never seen another human being. It was captivating.
Tonight, he was paying special attention to the way that Eddie’s nose would wrinkle when the lead singer would miss a high note or the gentle clink of his rings against his beer bottle. Beyond them, men leaned over other men at the bar, occasionally catching a soft kiss between drinks. Steve felt out of place in his striped polo, especially next to Eddie’s leather jacket and ripped jeans. He nodded along to whatever it was Eddie was saying about time signatures, watching how the dancefloor lights illuminated his long eyelashes.
He was so distracted by the gravitational pull Eddie had on his attention that he almost missed the man walking up to their table. It startled Steve a little when the man leaned over his side of the booth, a genial smile crinkling the skin near his dark eyes. His hair was cropped shorter than Steve’s and he had a mustache that reminded Steve of Freddie Mercury.
“I don’t think I've seen you here before and I'd hate for a newcomer to spend their whole night sitting. Care to dance?” the man asked, his voice warm and friendly. Steve took in the dark jeans and mesh tank top he was wearing, so unlike anything he’d ever seen another adult wear.
There was a moment’s hesitation where Steve glanced over at Eddie, who looked a bit dumbstruck that a stranger had approached them at all. Then Steve looked back up at the man, who was holding out an inviting hand, and his curiosity got the better of him.
“What the hell, why not?” Steve said, shoving up from his seat. They were a thousand miles away from Hawkins and he liked dancing, even if the only available partners were men.
He took the man’s hand, much larger than any girl he’d ever danced with, and was pulled out onto the floor. It was sweaty and the music was poundingly loud. It had been a long time since Steve had been to a real party, but his body still remembered how to move. However, instead of the small hands that normally lingered on his chest and leaning down to look at his partner, he was looking up at the mustached man as a strong arm snaked around his waist. It was exhilarating not to have to lead and to just be able to let go.
He danced with his nameless partner until his shirt was beginning to stick to the dampness on his back. The man’s hands had drifted further and further down his waist with each passing song. He briefly saw Robin flit past him, surrounded by a gaggle of women in various states of dress. She looked flushed and happier than he had ever seen her.
As the song changed, he glanced backward. Through the tangled limbs and swaying bodies of the crowd, he could see Eddie sitting at their booth. He was tucked back into the darkest corner, holding his beer close to his chest and staring back at Steve. It was the look on his face that caused Steve’s hands to slide off the man’s shoulders. He’d seen that look before, worn it often enough himself. Jealousy .
“I, uh, I think I’m going to sit back down. Thanks for the dance though, it was fun,” Steve said, out of breath. The man gave him a genial smile, releasing his waist and stepping back.
“Anytime, newcomer,” the man said with a wink and then he disappeared into the crowd. Steve wormed his way back to their booth, Eddie’s eyes following him the whole time.
“Sorry, didn’t mean to leave you alone over here,” Steve said, collapsing down into the booth. He was more worn out than he expected. Either he was getting old or he was way out of party practice.
“S’alright. You looked like you were having fun,” Eddie said, more to his drink than to Steve. Steve picked his own beer back up and took a drink. It felt uncomfortably like high school, the way he used to lose friends when their crushes started to take an interest in him.
“Yeah, well, he was just an okay dancer so you didn’t miss out on much,” Steve said, rubbing the back of his neck. Eddie gave him a strange look. “Anyways, why don’t you get up and come dance with me?”
“Not really my thing. Besides, Steve, it’s a gay bar. Don’t you think people will assume we’re together?” Eddie said, the last part coming out a little harsh.
“C’mon, Eddie, the only other person we know here is Robin. I think our reputations will survive,” Steve said, trying to rally the mood. Eddie had been so relaxed earlier and Steve wanted to make sure he stayed that way.
“Fine,” Eddie grumbled and slid out of the booth. Steve grinned, taking his wrist and pulling the other boy toward the crowd.
As soon as they made it out to the dance floor, the music slowed and Eddie started to pull away from Steve, glancing back toward their booth. Steve panicked and grabbed Eddie’s waist, pulling their chests flush and raising the arm he had a hold on as if they were doing some kind of ballroom dance. Mere centimeters from his face, Steve could see his reflection mirrored in Eddie’s shocked gaze. A soft guitar solo came on and Eddie relaxed minutely, sliding his other hand up to Steve’s shoulder.
Steve licked his lips. This close he could smell Eddie’s cheap cologne and the cigarettes he always had on him. The zipper of his leather jacket brushed against his arm as he started to sway. Eddie followed his lead and Steve slid his hand up his wrist to hold Eddie’s hand aloft properly. He could feel the callouses from playing guitar and manual labor that formed rough spots on his palm.
“You know, I never went to prom. Not once in all of high school,” Eddie said suddenly, much more audible than he had been the rest of the night.
“Really? I went all of mine,” Steve replied. They had been fun, if a bit jarring after all of the supernatural stuff he had dealt with.
“Go figure, you were King Steve,” Eddie chuckled and Steve could feel the way his chest shook under his hand, “I used to think that prom was such a preppy thing to do and it was stupid. Now, I’ll never have the chance to be a nuisance to everyone in the school gym, even if the gym is kind of obliterated at the moment. I appreciate that Owens got me my GED, but it also kind of killed my graduation plans.”
“Well, we can pretend it’s prom if you want. Close your eyes, imagine the high school gym,” Steve said, grinning as he moved them in a slow circle.
“This is stupid,” Eddie said, but did as he was told. Steve pressed them close together, bringing his cheek next to Eddie’s so that he could speak directly into his ear. The music was getting a little louder and it was hard to create an immersive fantasy if the other person was struggling to hear you.
“You're surrounded by high schoolers. Most of them are looking to get lucky for the first time at the end of the night. It will be objectively the worst sex they ever have. The other half are a bit drunk and sweating through their fancy clothes. Dustin, Mike, and the others all look absolutely ridiculous but they’re having the time of their lives. Joyce has done something fantastic with El’s makeup. Max is bitching about her casts and Lucas is trying to figure out how they're going to make a slow dance work. Jonathan and Nancy are making out by the punch bowl. Robin is actually dancing with Vicky and she’s so excited might actually throw up,” Steve said and Eddie chuckled. His soft curls brushed up against Steve’s brow and he leaned into them.
“You, of course, look fantastic. A real rock star, way cooler than anyone else there,” Steve said, letting his hand drift further around Eddie, landing more in the middle of his back.
“And every girl in the room is ready to kill me because I’m slow dancing with King Steve,” Eddie said, his voice light with humor. Steve grinned, pulling back to see a mirrored smile on Eddie’s face.
“Well, it would be their loss because I think you’re the better dancer between us,” he said. He could tell that the song was ending and brought their circling to a gentle standing sway. It wasn’t unusual for him to be this close to Eddie these days, but there was an electric edge to it that was new. Some tension that Steve could swear was familiar to him.
“You really ought to play D&D with us sometime. You’re not half bad at storytelling,” Eddie said. He reached up and tucked some of the hair that had fallen into Steve’s eyes back behind his ear. If Steve hadn’t already been flushed from all the exercise that would have made him blush. No one had done that since he had dated Nancy.
“You know, maybe I will,” Steve said, despite years of turning down the kids. For some reason, it was just so easy to say yes to Eddie. The song ended and then they stepped back from one another. The lights came on and it was time to find Robin.
They had pushed the beds together, sleeping in the mega-bed together with Robin in the middle. Steve had laid awake for a while after the other two had fallen asleep, staring at the ceiling. He kept replaying the way Eddie’s eyes had looked when he pushed back Steve's hair, all soft and dark. He had to fight the urge to sit up and look over at Eddie, for fear of waking Robin. He eventually drifted off and was the last up of the trio, finding the other two sharing a cup of coffee at the end of the bed when he awoke. After that, they started getting ready, taking turns with the shower and packing in between.
“There’s a bookstore I want to hit before we head back,” Robin said, “I called a few days ago and they have some rare editions I want to check out.” She was struggling to get a booklet full of girl’s numbers from the previous night into one of the pockets of her suitcase.
“That's fine with me,” Steve said, packing up last night’s pajamas and zipping his duffle shut. Eddie gave a thumbs up from the bathroom where he was brushing his teeth. Watching Eddie go about domestic activities like that always made Steve’s chest twist in weird ways. He looked away from him and focused on helping Robin get her suitcase closed.
The bookstore ended up being a little hole-in-the-wall place on their way out of town. It was a bit dingy and looked like it could use a severe dusting, but it had the same quiet vibe most libraries did. Robin began chatting with the man at the counter about the edditions she was looking for and Eddie beelined for the fantasy section, leaving Steve alone.
Steve was not an avid reader. That wasn’t to say that he couldn’t read or didn’t like it. In fact, English had always been one of his better subjects. It was more that he never knew what books were actually good. He was currently working through Lord of the Rings because Dustin insisted that they couldn’t be friends unless he read it. He’d never admit it to the little punk, but they might be the best books he’d ever read.
He wandered aimlessly through the shelves, moving toward the back of the store looking for something interesting. Hidden in the back corner was a stand full of pamphlets in the back with an accompanying ‘Take One Free’ sign. He gave them a quick glance over, not intending to browse them, but the titles caught his eye. Right in the middle was ‘Bisexuality: Attraction Beyond Gender.’
Steve furrowed his brow. Bisexuality. That was a new word, maybe he’d ask Robin about it later. He pulled the pamphlet out and thumbed through it. It seemed interesting enough, so he slid it down into his jacket pocket. He scanned through a few more. The one on being a good ally looked useful, so into the jacket it went.
Then he came across ‘Getting Physical: A Guide to Gay Sex.’ Chock it up to his morbid curiosity, but Steve pulled the pamphlet out of the display, angling himself away from any potential customers. He opened it to the middle and there were illustrations. Steve’s ears were burning but he couldn’t tear his eyes from the page.
“Steve?” Eddie’s voice came from an aisle over. Steve hastily shoved the pamphlet into his pocket, wishing the ground would just swallow him whole. Eddie poked his head around the corner, looking over at him.
“You okay? You look a little red, man,” Eddie said and Steve wanted to die. He walked over, giving a glance to the stand behind him.
“I’m fine. It’s just kinda stuffy in here,” Steve said and pulled at the collar of his shirt for emphasis. He needed to evacuate immediately and he couldn’t even pinpoint what was making him feel so embarrassed. Eddie was obviously cool with the whole gay thing, but for some reason, he really didn’t want to have a conversation with him about those pamphlets.
“Alright, Robin’s ready to check out if you are,” Eddie said, giving him a look over as if he didn’t quite believe him.
“Yeah, sure,” Steve said, wanting to get as far away from the stand as possible. He followed Eddie back to the front counter and they were on the road within fifteen minutes.
Steve sped the whole way home. Robin yelled at him at least twice to slow down and he didn’t even notice when Eddie switched his ABBA cassette out with some metal mixed tape he had made. Those pamphlets were burning a hole in his jacket and he needed to get home before he caught fire with them.