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It’s the 17th of December, and it’s snowing again, is Jaehyun’s first thought when he wakes up 15 minutes past 8. He burrows into his thick blanket wanting to get more sleep, but thinks better of it; he might miss out on the breakfast with his parents. He likes joining them if he’s not busy, and since he’s on winter break, he tries to sit down and eat with them most times without having to rush leaving.
Sitting up, he grabs his phone off the nightstand and opens a text from Taeyong. Smiling from ear to ear as he reads a cute good morning text bracketed with three heart emojis on each side. Taeyong never fails to send him a text first thing in the morning, but now that they’re dating, he’s made it his mission to sprinkle cute emoticons everytime just to make Jaehyun’s heart flutter like giddy butterflies.
Three months flew by since Taeyong asked to be boyfriends, since Jaehyun read that heartstopping letter, and every single day he walks on clouds. The feeling is just like he imagined all those years. Euphoric, and as if nothing could go wrong. Waking up to Taeyong being his boyfriend just made him look forward to the days more than he ever did.
They’re a lowkey couple. Nothing changed in their routine as best friends. The way they behave in school remains the same, so nobody ever stopped to ask if they’re finally an item—not like they gave such an impression. As a shy, new couple, they haven’t really figured out yet how to break the news to their friends. They will probably be teased endlessly, so the best course of action is to let their close pals know after graduation.
Sending a quick reply, Jaehyun plugs his phone to let it charge before making his bed, washing his face, and then going down for breakfast.
Jingle Bells plays on cue as he walks into the kitchen, finding his mother sitting at the table reading the newspaper and his father preparing their food. “Morning!”
“Ready for your hot chocolate?”
Taking his seat, he tilts his head for a kiss on the cheek from his mother as she gets up to make the drinks. His father then sets the food on the table, a mouthwatering pan of kimchi fried rice with mixed veggies. “That looks good…”
“And I made it a little more spicy for you.”
Jaehyun patiently waits for the mugs of hot choco with a piece of floating marshmallow before he eats his first spoonful of fried rice, humming as the flavor bursts in his mouth. “I should start learning how to cook.”
“Exactly. What if we’re away and you don’t like what’s in the cupboard? Too much instant food is not good for you.”
“That’s true. But first, I want to learn so I can cook something for Taeyong.”
“Filling in the reliable boyfriend spot?”
Jaehyun sticks his tongue out at his father and stuffs his face with more food. His mother then asks if he and Taeyong has plans for winter break.
He hasn’t talked about it with Taeyong yet. “Just the usual, I guess. I go over to his house to play and feed his fish, or he comes over to eat our food and sleep. And we might…go out sometimes?”
His mother smiles. “Couples go on dates all the time. What about after graduation?”
That depends on which school he’s going to for which degree he’ll take. He thinks of that one school that hasn’t responded yet, that he’s been waiting for every single day for over a month now. “Well, I don’t really know. There are many things we should consider before going on a long trip. Maybe Taeyong has plans with his mom.”
Jaehyun focuses on his food as his parents talk about the possible things they can do before he gets back to school. He volunteers to wash the dishes when they finish as his mom hangs more ornaments on their 6-foot Christmas Tree and his father shovels snow out of the driveway.
When he’s done and the sink is wiped dry, he grabs his coat and puts his shoes on before going out. If his parents already checked the mailbox, they’d tell him if there’s a letter or not.
“Dad, did you look…?”
“Oh, not yet.” His father glances at the mailbox. “We think it’ll be sent out next month. They probably received a ton of applications.”
Berklee College of Music has an acceptance rate of 51%, and is probably the most flexible out of the top music schools in the US but they’re still pretty selective when it comes to accepting hopeful applicants. Jaehyun is confident he’d met their expectations—it’s only a matter of whether they want to give him a chance.
He’s ready to be met with nothing when he opens the mailbox, and freezes up at the sight of an envelope. “…There’s something here.” Shakily, he takes it out. The sides wrinkle from his grip as he reads Berklee College of Music on the back of the envelope.
“It’s from BCM.”
Overhearing the conversation, his mother hastily walks out asking what the letter says.
Anxiety fills Jaehyun. “…Actually, can I go to Taeyong first?”
Whatever this letter contains, he wants Taeyong to be the first to know.
He walks past his confused parents and quickly gets changed in his room. With his heart thudding violently, Jaehyun borrows his mother’s bike and pedals as fast as he can to his boyfriend’s house.
Taeyong’s mother open the door when he arrives. “Oh, Jaehyun! Are you here for him?”
“Yes ma’am, is he there?”
“Upstairs in his room. Come in! Have you eaten already?”
Jaehyun nods before scampering to his boyfriend’s room. He doesn’t mean to leave Taeyong’s mother just like that but he’s jittery and he might throw up any second if he doesn’t open the letter soon.
Taeyong is lying on his stomach on the bed playing Animal Crossing on his switch when Jaehyun barges in. “Yongie!”
“Shit—you’re gonna give me a heart attack—”
“Did you not hear me downstairs? You’re getting so obsessed with that game.” Jaehyun greets the fishes first as he takes his coat off, and sits on Taeyong’s bed. “Pay attention to me.”
“Okay, okay.” Putting the game away, Taeyong sidles up to him and pecks his cheek. “Hello, I missed you.”
A nice pink blush blooms on his cheeks. “Likewise. But—I got something to show you. Here.” He fishes out the envelope from his coat’s pocket and waves it.
Taeyong’s eyes widen. “Did you already read it? Did you pass?”
“I wanted to open the letter with you.”
The others would rather share the result of their exams, whether they passed or failed, with their parents first, or with whoever is funding their education. But they don’t have an Lee Taeyong, and Taeyong is Jaehyun’s family too. Taeyong is special.
He sighs as Taeyong wraps an arm around him. “On the count of 3, okay?”
“Okay. 1…2…3—”
Jaehyun tears the envelope and unfolds the letter, wasting no time in skimming the content.
“…They want me,” he mumbles in disbelief after that nerve-wracking silence. “They want me, Taeyong. They think I’m good.”
“You’re not just good! You’re amazing!” Taeyong grabs his face and stamps a kiss on his forehead. “I knew you could do it! My boyfriend is the best singer in the world! I know—don’t fight me—I knew you’d be phenomenal since you sang Pretty Boy on your 8th birthday!”
Laughing, Jaehyun tackles Taeyong in a hug. He can’t believe it! A prestigious music school wants him! “Oh my god, I’m going back to the US, right?”
“Of course! You can’t attend BCM if you’re not going there, duh.”
He pictures it vividly. The thought of attending a school that many aspiring musicians dream of lights fireworks in him. Pride swells in his heart. He’ll never be tired of answering whenever people ask which school he goes to. If possible, if it weren’t mortifying, he’d print the school’s name and laminate it, then staple it on his forehead. Look at me, I’m attending Berklee College of Music!
“I’m a proud boyfriend, Hyunie. I have a boyfriend from an awesome school in the US.”
As quickly as victory came, Jaehyun’s excitement fades as what this entails sinks into him. His parents will prefer if he doesn’t go back and forth during summer and winter breaks to cut down the flight expenses, to be the ones to go there and visit him.
This means leaving Taeyong. This means not being with Taeyong for a year or longer than that.
Jaehyun pulls away, crestfallen.
“Hey, what’s wrong?”
“…You’re staying here, and I’m going to Boston.”
“Mhm…? Because I’m attending Korea National University of Arts, and you’re going to Berklee College of Music. What about it?”
“I don’t want to leave you,” he says quietly, looking into Taeyong’s eyes. “Since I passed Yonsei and SNU too—”
“Hold up, stop right there,” Taeyong holds a hand up, shaking his head. “You applied for Engineering in Yonsei and SNU. You’re not going to sing and play musical instruments as an engineering student.”
“But I also want to be an astronaut. I know taking engineering is not enough, I need to study more than that, but that’s my first step.”
Taeyong pursues his lips. “I know. You told me you wanted to be an astronaut when we went sledding at Yongpyong. That you were sure you wanted to be one when you grow up. And then you realized you like singing more. Dreams change, Jaehyun. You being happier to be accepted in Berklee College of Music than Yonsei and SNU is proof of it.”
“I don’t like being a singer more than being an astronaut—”
“Come on.” Taeyong kisses his cheek. “What do you take me for? I know you.”
That’s right. Taeyong knows him better than he knows himself sometimes. Taeyong probably knows that he only applied to local universities just so they could be together.
“…I could’ve applied for music here.”
“That’s not what you truly want, though. Didn’t you say you wanted to perform on Broadway someday? This is a huge advantage for you. Jaehyun…” Taeyong’s gaze softens. “Don’t choose me over this. It’s not like we’re breaking up when you go to the US. This is your future.”
You are my future too.
Jaehyun looks down at the letter, folding it. “There’s still a lot of time to decide…”
“…Alright. You’re overwhelmed right now, aren’t you? Do you wanna cuddle?”
Shoving the letter back in his coat, Jaehyun lies down and spoons Taeyong. Distractedly watching his boyfriend play Animal Crossing while thinking of the inevitable. Graduation is just two months away. There’s really not much time for him to decide, but he doesn’t want to think of it. He doesn’t want to think of leaving the love of his life behind.
He wants to file the whole Berklee College of Music thing away in the meantime but his parents make it a point to remind him every hour how he got accepted because he can sing beautifully, play the piano like a master, and how he’d directed theater plays back in middle school. Don’t get him wrong—he’s proud of those talents and he is thankful he can do all those things, except that they might be the reason he’d be away from Taeyong for a while.
It’s hard to make sudden adjustments when he already had his whole life planned out since he was 7, and Taeyong is in every part of it. That’s his biggest mistake, he didn’t see the plot holes.
Dressed warmly, with a loose scarf around his neck and a pink beanie on his head, Jaehyun says goodbye to his mother and goes out, heading to Taeyong’s house to pick him up so they could go to the mall together.
His parents’ anniversary is coming right up and they said it’ll be a grand party so everybody has to be in their best suits or dresses. As far as Jaehyun knows, their relatives and some of his parents’ friends in the US are flying to Korea just for it. If his beloved grandmother is coming as well, then Jaehyun needs to bring Taeyong to the party and introduce him to his sweet halmeoni.
Taeyong is stepping out of the house when he gets there, wearing fluffy earmuffs. Jaehyun is already a few inches taller than him so it just made Taeyong look even cuter.
“Ready to go? It might take us a while.”
“It’s fine, we can just eat at the mall. Bye, ma!”
Jaehyun waves at his boyfriend’s mother and makes his way to the bus stop with Taeyong walking right next to him. They catch their bus right on time, and Taeyong rambles about the upcoming performance of his crew once school resumes on the whole ride to the mall.
He’d seen the choreography video and it was nothing short of spectacular. For a high school dance major, Taeyong already moves like a professional. It’d be dumb of Korea National University of Arts if they declined his application.
Taeyong notices that he hasn’t said a word yet, and stops gesticulating. “Why are you just staring at me?”
“You’re pretty.”
His boyfriend pinches his cheeks, reddening. “Flatterer! You always tell me that.”
And Jaehyun will never get tired of it.
When they get to the mall, he grabs Taeyong’s hand and leads him to the shop that his mother recommended.
The clerks have been expecting them so they get their measurements immediately taken. Because the displays in the shop are not their sizes, they are told that the suits will take a week before they will be delivered to their addresses.
Jaehyun settles the down payment as soon as they’re done jotting down Taeyong’s measurement.
“How much is it?”
“Don’t mind it, mom and dad gave us money for the suits.”
“Oh, okay. Thank you. But I could’ve paid for mine…”
“I suppose they thought they should cover it since they’re the ones that wanted everyone to be in formal attire.” Jaehyun signs the receipt and puts it in his wallet. “Do you want to try on some suits? Let’s see how we’ll look in them.”
Taeyong asks one of the clerks to hand him the white suit on display, so Jaehyun gets the one in black.
Getting in one of the stalls in the fitting room, Jaehyun quickly but carefully dons the suit lest he ruins it, and checks himself in the mirror. Somehow, he suddenly looks older than his age. “Are you done?” He asks as he hears some rustling from the next stall.
“I don’t know how to tie my tie! Ugh.”
“Let me help.” He goes out and knocks on Taeyong’s stall, stepping in as soon as Taeyong unlocks it for him. “Why don’t you know how to do this?”
“Dads usually teach their sons how to tie their ties.”
Jaehyun doesn’t comment on it. Even his parents don’t know the whereabouts of Taeyong’s father. If his boyfriend thinks there’s no reason to talk about it, then Jaehyun won’t ask.
Slowly, he shows Taeyong how to properly tie a tie. “We look handsome,” he says as they both face the mirror.
“You look like a mailman.”
“No, I don’t. You’re just making fun of me.”
“Yeah, because I don’t know how to act when you’re being so fucking hot.”
Ears heating up, Jaehyun clears his throat before adjusting Taeyong’s tie. “When I was a kid, I badly wanted mom to buy me a suit because dad looked cool in it. But the first time I wore one, I realized it was quite boring because all of my dad’s co-workers were wearing the same suit. I looked like a mini office worker. I guess…the only time I’ll genuinely like wearing a suit will be on my wedding day.”
Taeyong stares at him intently. “What kind of wedding do you like?”
“…I don’t have a particular favorite. Church, beach, garden…they’re all great.”
“What matters is the people that will be there, right?”
“…Especially the person that you’re marrying.” Jaehyun looks at his reflection again as he now buttons his cuffs.
Why does it feel like the room has gotten even smaller? And is the shop’s AC broken?
“What kind of wedding do you like?”
“A church wedding because I’m traditional.” Taeyong giggles, and tugs on the end of his tie. “You’re really hot, Jaehyun. I don’t know what to do with myself.”
The second their eyes meet in the mirror, Jaehyun gives in to the whispers in his head and cages Taeyong against the wall, throat bobbing.
“You’ve never told me that before. Said I was handsome, cute, adorable, cool…but not hot.”
“Because you weren’t my boyfriend yet.” Taeyong pulls him closer, their mouths less than an inch apart. “Can I get a kiss…?”
He gives it without second thoughts, wondering if the clerks are going to knock on the door if they take too long. Jaehyun takes Taeyong’s lower lip between his and lightly sucks on it, pulling a gasp out of his boyfriend.
Every kiss they share feels like the first. He’d dreamed about kissing Taeyong for so many times that this lifetime might not be long enough to reenact them.
“I like this.” Taeyong murmurs in between the kisses, grasping his shirt. “You’re getting taller…I like feeling small in your arms.”
They haven’t gone past kissing and some touching yet. But right now, Jaehyun wants to press Taeyong flat against the wall and feel more of him, do the things he’d frequently envision in his sleep that leaves him in pain the next morning.
“Jaehyun—”
He peels himself away before their hips could touch, now shamefully aware of the blooming problem in his pants. “Sorry—”
“It’s fine.” Taeyong doesn’t look fine. He looks like he’s going to erupt from how red he is. “They probably want the suits back now.”
Returning to his own stall to get changed, Jaehyun huffs irritatedly as he tries to will his erection away. Curse these raging hormones, their intensity tripled when he kissed Taeyong the first time and it’s been through the roof since then.
At least he already knows how he’ll spend the whole afternoon at home. Locked in his room and doing god knows what under the blanket his trusty and creative imagination. Being young and active is sometimes very burdensome, especially with a boyfriend as gorgeous as Taeyong.
With his gloves still in the dryer, Taeyong keeps his hands in his pockets as he and Jaehyun make their way to SOPA. “I told you I could do this alone.”
“You don’t have to do this alone if I’m here, though.”
He chuckles, nudging Jaehyun’s side. “I’m just going to pay for something. You slept late last night, so you should’ve just stayed in bed.”
Jaehyun raises a brow. “How did you know I slept late last night?”
“Uh, because I was on the phone with you until 2am?”
“Precisely. So you slept late too and that’s another reason why I should go with you. If you fell asleep on the bus, I would wake you up. If you are too sleepy to stand up straight, then I’ll pay for whatever it is you’re coming to school for.”
“Do you realize how ridiculous that sounds?”
“Maybe it is ridiculous, but I love you so I want to do anything I can for you.”
Biting down his lip, Taeyong keeps himself from smiling too hard. “Say it again. I like hearing those words from you.”
Jaehyun takes a deep breath, throwing his arms in the air. “I love you, Taeyong! Must love Taeyong, must kiss Taeyong, must hug Taeyong! Must be with Taeyong always! Must love my Taeyong forever!”
A few heads turn their way as Jaehyun continues to scream his feelings to the world. Taeyong doubles over in laughter, linking their arms as they enter the schoolgates.
Thankfully, no one else is there when they get to the cash department. Taeyong knock on the window, greeting the cashier. “Hello, good morning. I’m going to pay for my tuition fee.”
Jaehyun’s brows knit as he hands his matriculation certificate. “I thought you were just going to pay for the graduation fee.”
“Well, that too. But I can’t pay for my graduation fee if I still owe the school some money. I can’t get my diploma if I still have pending payments.”
“But you’re on scholarship, right?”
“A 50% scholarship, yes. You remember how mom’s company went bankrupt? We’re lucky the baking business is going well for us, but it’s been harder since she lost her job.”
“You didn’t say anything about this.” Jaehyun whispers as the cashier casts them a side glance. “We could’ve helped your mom.”
“She didn’t want your money if she didn’t say anything to your parents. We’re still making ends meet anyway. The money just gets delayed sometimes. Don’t worry about it. Look!” He shows the stamped receipt. “It’s all settled!”
After finding out that it was the Jeongs that gave his mother the money to open a bakery, Taeyong made his mother promise not to let his boyfriend’s family know about his pending school payments. He doesn’t want to rely on them.
“I’m going to miss this school when we graduate,” he says as they make their way back, crossing the desolate quadrangle. Taeyong drags Jaehyun towards one of the benches and sits down, glad that it has stopped snowing. “Do you still remember the day we met? When you transferred to my school?”
Jaehyun nods, rubbing his hand to keep it warm. “I remember everything related to you.”
“That’s impossible. We forget most of our childhood memories.”
“Not me. I was so into you that I unknowingly committed each memory in my head whenever we were together. I swear!”
“Really?” Taeyong smirks, pinching Jaehyun’s thigh. “Then do you remember who pushed you down the slides?”
Jaehyun frowns. “Sung…jin? Was that his name? That kid got nothing to do with you, so I don’t care.”
Taeyong snorts. “Touché. When you walked into the classroom, I thought you were the fluffiest kid I’ve ever seen. You were sooo chubby that the buttons of your uniform almost popped.”
“…You’re just fucking with me now.”
“No, you really had a stomach so big I wanted to squish it! And I did, didn’t I? I can’t recall if I ever did, but I must have done it. There’s no way I didn’t. Like during one of our sleepovers, perhaps. I wouldn’t be able to help myself. Your tummy felt like a pillow. Now it’s flat, and you’re losing all your baby fats, and… for some reason, it’s making me feel emotional.”
Taeyong chuckles at himself as he playfully pats Jaehyun’s belly. “A long time passed by and the soft, pudgy friend I had slowly disappeared right before my eyes. We’ve been friends for so long, Jaehyun. It actually blows my mind whenever I think of it.”
“Do you like this version of me better?”
He lifts his gaze, grinning. “I like all of you. I think…I’ve loved you for as long as you’ve loved me, even when I didn’t wholly understand it. It wasn’t the type that bloomed as we got older. It’s always been there, and I just came to terms with what it actually meant for you and I.” He starts giggling too when Jaehyun laughs. “Why…?”
“Because listening to you talk about loving me is like music to my ears, you know. No pun intended. We’ve been dating for 3 months but sometimes it still feels surreal to me. I’ve waited for you since I was 7, right? Courted you, gave you all those stupid things—”
“They’re not stupid,” Taeyong interrupts, booping Jaehyun’s nose with his pointer. “I loved the little gifts from you and I still have most of them. The pencils, the fruit erasers, and the colorful cartoon notepads? God, you were such a hopeless romantic. Imagine courting someone at only 7 years old!”
“You can’t blame me. I found my one true love too early.”
Warmth emanates from his chest as Jaehyun kisses the back of his hand. Jaehyun is always kissing him, touching him. Jaehyun is always right next to him.
What is he going to do when Jaehyun leaves?
Jaehyun plucks a flower from a bush behind them and tucks it to his ear, smiling. “Only the way I look changed, but I’m still your best friend. I’m still the boy that fell head-over-heels for you at 7 years old. And you’re the same to me. Your teeth grew out—”
“They’re still crooked, and I’m wearing these annoying braces.”
“But your smile is still my most favorite in the world. No matter how much we change, I’ll love you. I’ll always love you.”
Taeyong stands before Jaehyun and leans down, kissing his boyfriend on the lips. “I love you too. Give me a piggyback ride? Since you insisted on being my chauffeur.”
“I’ll carry you to the bus stop.” Jaehyun crouches, groaning as he hops on his back. “I didn’t know my boyfriend was a big baby!”
“You think that’s gonna insult me? I am your baby.”
“Yes, you are.”
Stifling a scream, Taeyong buries his face on Jaehyun’s shoulder.
“You’re my baby too.”
For this year’s Christmas, Jaehyun’s family invites Taeyong’s to celebrate with them. They do it alternately—last year, the Jeongs were the ones that spent the day at the Lees, bringing so much food for everyone to share.
Jaehyun is helping his mother set the table when Taeyong walks in after his mom, wearing a Winnnie the Pooh Christmas-themed sweater. “No way!”
Taeyong wiggles his brows at him before greeting his parents, setting a paper bag under the Christmas tree.
The shirt reminds Jaehyun of the times he and Taeyong would have tea parties with his old Pooh dolls. Nostalgia hits him. He hopes that the kids that received the plushies are taking good care of them.
It’s already lunchtime so they eat first, sharing the brownies that Taeyong’s mother baked for their dessert. The annual exchange gift follows—neither he nor Taeyong get each other but they always have their personal exchange gift anyway.
While the adults gush over their presents, Jaehyun pulls Taeyong to the stairs and away from their parents’ prying eyes.
“Too excited for your gift? What if it’s just a kiss?”
“If it’s just a kiss then it has to be really special. Where you’ll kiss me is up to me.”
“Really, Jeong Jaehyun? Right next to your mom and dad?”
“T-that’s not what I meant!” But it could work too if Taeyong is willing. “What do you have for me?”
Shaking his head fondly, Taeyong takes out a small box from his sweater’s pocket. “Merry Christmas, Jaehyunnie.”
How did Jaehyun not notice the slight bulge in Taeyong’s sweater? It just looked like his boyfriend had eaten too much before coming over.
A piano candle sits in the box when he opens it. Jaehyun grins and presses a kiss on Taeyong’s lips. “I love it. I’ll use it well.” Closing the box, he pulls Taeyong up to his room and closes the door.
“We should’ve just gone to your room right away if you left my present here. Now let me have it.”
“Wait a second—I didn’t want them to see you try it on.” Blushing, Jaehyun puts the piano candle on the nightstand before fetching his gift for Taeyong which had been shoved underneath the pile of clothes in his closet. “Here you go. Merry Christmas…”
Suspicious, Taeyong squints as he unwraps the present. Amusement settles on his face when he sees a set of Cinnamoroll hair clips. “Why do you not want them to see me wear these?”
“Because it’s for my eyes only.”
Taking one out, Taeyong stands before the mirror as he clips it on his hair. “Does it suit me? My face is too scary.”
“It’s not scary. It’s handsome and pretty and cute and beautiful.” Scoffing, Jaehyun wraps his arms around Taeyong from behind and drops a kiss on his boyfriend’s shoulder. “You look so lovely.”
Something flashes in his eyes, and Taeyong must have seen it. Must have gotten a clue of the indecency taking root in his mind at the moment.
“I think you like this a little too much.”
Slightly ashamed, Jaehyun breaks the hug. “Shall we go now?”
“We have plans today?”
“We can’t spend the whole day with our parents. Christmas is for going on dates.” Removing the clip off of Taeyong’s hair, Jaehyun brings the set with him as they go downstairs, slipping Taeyong’s gift in their paper bag.
“Mom, dad, we’re going out.”
“So soon? But you haven’t sung for us!”
Jaehyun gawks. “You’re not doing this…”
His mother laughs. “Other countries do it, don’t they? Come on, sing something for us and you’ll get some money. Which, I reckon, you can use for your date.”
He and Taeyong sag as his father takes the Rudolph nose and elf ears from the Christmas tree. “I knew these were out of place!”
Taeyong takes the elf ears, elbowing him. “Make use of those heavenly vocals, will you?” He snaps the elf ears on, sighing. “This is the first time my own mother betrayed me like this.”
“Consider it a pre-graduation gift!”
“It’s kind of blackmail-y.”
Certain that they can’t go unless they indulge the elders, Jaehyun poutily sings Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer while following Taeyong’s silly dance. He can’t believe this is happening—their parents are even filming them! What do they think they’re going to use that video for?
They conclude the performance by making heart arms for extra points—or coins. Jaehyun lets Taeyong keep the money as he removes their funny costumes, and wraps his own scarf around Taeyong.
The Sky Rose Garden is surprisingly not crowded when they arrive considering the amount of couples on a date outside. While waiting for the movie they’re going to watch, Jaehyun buys him and Taeyong drinks and fries to snack on.
Taeyong is mesmerized by the bushes of roses and other various plants surrounding the chairs and tables. The sides of the rooftop are also margined with more pink roses that give off a sweet fragrance as the wind blows. Having the Namsan Tower in the backdrop makes the place a highly recommended date idea.
“Can we come here again after the movie?”
“They usually close at 8:30, so I guess we can come back for more snacks. But if you get hungry, we can eat at the fast food restaurants nearby.”
“I just want to take pictures when it’s dark. I think it’s going to be even more breathtaking here.”
Jaehyun openly observes his boyfriend as they eat. His heart overflows with so much love it threatens to consume him. Wanting to immortalize this moment, he takes his phone out and takes a picture of Taeyong, setting it as his wallpaper.
When their food is gone, they walk around the garden taking pictures of each other. Jaehyun tells Taeyong to stand by the thickest bush of roses, beaming as Taeyong playfully pulls the rosebud to his nose. “You make me feel like a paparazzi.”
“But you don’t have to stalk me for me to love you, though. Isn’t that what the song is about?”
“Taeyong!”
Jaehyun puts his phone down as comes up to them—to Taeyong in particular, greeting his boyfriend. He recognizes the guy as one of Taeyong’s classmates.
“Are you here to watch a movie too or are you done?”
“We’re just about to watch something.”
“Oh cool! My friends and I are here to watch too. If you want, you could join us. I’m sick of 5th wheeling so it’ll be nice if you could tag along so I won’t feel too alone.”
Taeyong laughs awkwardly.
“Did that sound like I’m asking you out? Hopefully it was smooth ‘cause if it’s not clear yet, I do have a tiny crush on you and it’ll make my day if you hang out with me. We’re going to the noraebang after the movie.”
Jaehyun’s eye twitches. How dare this guy talk to Taeyong like he’s literally not standing there? Sure they haven’t revealed yet that they are boyfriends, but is it not obvious that he and Taeyong are on a date?
“Actually, I’m—”
“He’s with me.” Jaehyun grabs Taeyong’s hand, entwining their fingers. “We’re on a date,” he says as if Taeyong’s classmate was a dunce.
“Oh…”
Taeyong chuckles. “We didn’t know how to tell our friends without making it a big deal, but yeah, Jaehyun is my boyfriend now.”
“That’s great! Like it makes sense since he’s always tailing you like a pet around campus. Damn, I shot my shot too late. But it’s fine. Merry Christmas, you two. I’ll see you around.”
“Maybe not,” Jaehyun mumbles as the guy walks back to his squad.
“Aww, Jaehyunnie.” Taeyong pats his chest, giggling. “Are you jealous?”
“Why would I be jealous? I just think it’s so cocky of him to assume you’re not on a date when you’re literally at Sky Rose Garden with another boy.”
“Everybody knows you’re my best friend so they wouldn’t think beyond that. Plus Sky Rose Garden isn’t just for couples, is it? If it was, he wouldn’t have been granted entrance since he’s 5th wheeling.” Taeyong squishes his cheeks. “You’re so cute. Grabbing my hand like that, maybe you should go around campus telling everyone we’re dating. I like being yours.”
Possessively, Jaehyun coils an arm around Taeyong and lifts his phone, taking a selfie with his boyfriend. His smile widens as Taeyong surprises him with a kiss on the cheek.
He’s confident about Taeyong’s love for him. But they’ve known each other for so long—been classmates since primary school until junior year, regularly coming over to each other’s house to play, their families always coming together on special occasions. They literally grew up together.
What if Taeyong grows bored of him one day and looks for something new?
Soobin, one of Jaehyun’s close friends in class, texts him that he’s already outside the door. His parents are busy finalizing things for the anniversary party so he’s alone, and Taeyong is helping his mother at the bakery.
He comes down and opens the door for his friend. “Told you to just get in when you arrive. What did you bring?”
“The 1000-piece puzzle my cousin got for me for Christmas.”
“Wait—we’re going to start on that here? How are you gonna take it home?”
“Simple—I won’t! I’m gonna leave the puzzle here because Zoey might chew it up.”
Remembering that dog that likes the tear stuff to shreds, Jaehyun shrugs and grabs something for them to eat. “My bedroom doesn’t have much floor space anymore so we can just do it here. We’ll set it aside so it’ll be out of the way.”
They sit right in front of the fireplace. Soobin opens the box and upends it, pouring the puzzle pieces on the floor. “How long do you think this is gonna take us to finish?”
“Probably forever. It’s not like I could come over everyday and be here for hours on end. If you want, you can work on it with your parents.”
Looking at the picture guide, Jaehyun gathers everything that has the same color.
“I asked Miyoung if she wanted to do the puzzle with me but she said puzzles bore her easily and she’d rather shop with her friends. Isn’t shopping a waste of time?”
“More like a waste of money if she buys a lot of unnecessary things, but who am I to comment on how your girlfriend spends her allowance? Isn’t she loaded?”
Soobin sighs. “I guess this is how it is when you’re dating a well-off girl. All they think about is shopping and manicure.”
“That’s called stereotyping.”
“Am I wrong?”
Jaehyun opens a can of pineapple juice and hands it to his friend, hoping it’ll cool the guy’s head. “But if shopping is what makes her happy, then just let her be. Just look for something that both of you will enjoy. Pretty sure you have common interests.”
“It’s just that I’d like to be with her more while it’s winter break. She’s always preoccupied when I call her so it makes me wonder if she doesn’t miss me as much as I miss her.”
“She’s our classmate, so you were with her every day before the break started.”
His friend huffs, flipping puzzle pieces. “I hate it when you point out the obvious. Still. It’s not like we sit together. During lunch, she’s still with her friends. Her driver always picks her up on the dot too.”
“How sad,” Jaehyun says monotonously, starting to put some pieces together. “Anyway, I think you should try to work on the blue ones that’ll make up the sky since it’s the hardest.”
“Wow, you’re such a nice friend,” Soobin grumbles. “But what did I expect? You’re single, how could you have an opinion on dating?”
Scratching his head, Jaehyun confesses. “I am dating.”
“Yeah, who? Taeyong? That’s your best friend—” Soobin nearly knocks the juice over as it hits him. “Are you for real?”
“Why would I joke about something like this? I’ve been in love with my best friend since we were 7.”
“Wait—hold up, he’s the crush you once talked to me about?”
“Did I not make it easy to guess?”
“Err, no? You didn’t give me a clue other than you’ve been friends with your crush for years. What if it was a friend from another school? But wow, congratulations! When I get to ask Miyoung out, let’s go on a double date!”
“I’ll ask Taeyong first if he’d want to.” Jaehyun waits for the onslaught of questions that demand a complete recollection of his and Taeyong’s relationship, but Soobin has nothing more to say about it. “Actually, can I ask you something?”
“About what?”
“Well…I’ve never been the type to gatekeep Taeyong from others. If he wants to have more friends, then he’s free to do so. I am friends with people he’s not friends with, and we’re both fine with that. When we were kids, he was the one that would throw a tantrum if he saw me playing with someone else though he eventually grew out of that. But now…”
Soobin asks if he’s jealous. Jaehyun avoids the other’s gaze.
“I’m not. I’m just…worried. We’re attending different schools in college and…when I’m gone and he meets plenty of new people, he might realize it’s no longer fun to be with me. I’ve been with him for 11 years. There’s….less thrill than when you meet someone new.”
“But relationships don’t always have to be exciting, or new, or thrilling,” Soobin says, collecting the blue puzzle pieces. “Relationships can be boring and dull and at some point, sickening too. But that’s when you’ll know if you truly love someone. When you still want to spend the boring and slow days with them, when you still want to do the same old things with them. Unless you think the relationship is going nowhere.”
Jaehyun is taken back to the conversation he had with Taeyong when they were trying their suits on. Does Taeyong intend to marry him…? “There are lots of better men in college.”
“Just talk it out with him and establish that mutual trust with each other. Even though I complain about Miyoung having no time for me these days, I know she only likes me, and we’ll still be together after high school.”
“I trust him, though. But isn’t jealousy normal?”
“To an extent. But it may come off as lack of trust if you don’t manage it. Don’t worry too much!” Soobin waves a hand dismissively. “Tons of high school couples last a long time.”
Taking his friend’s word for it, Jaehyun drops the subject. He just won’t tell Taeyong about it since it seems childish. As soon as he decides to forget about it for now, another concern occurs to him that leaves his face on fire.
“Um, there’s something else I wanna know. It’s okay if you won’t answer! I just don’t want to talk to my parents about this. But…have you and Miyoung…done it already?”
Soobin splutters. “I won’t say anything!”
That’s practically a yes. “But I need some advice! I want to—I want to do it with him and—”
“Did your parents not give you a talk about the birds and the bees? Do they know you have a boyfriend?”
Jaehyun’s lower lip juts out as he sadly arranges the puzzle pieces. “I pray that they won’t sit me down for it because it’s embarrasing as fuck.”
“J-just nod and say yes, you understand them! And it’s important to always be safe.” Soobin scowls at the innocent puzzle, face so hot a steam might be coming off of it. “First times won’t be perfect.”
Taking pity on himself and his friend, Jaehyun doesn’t utter a word about it for the rest of the afternoon. He also makes a mental note of going to the pharmacy before his parents come home.
The party takes place on the 14th of January at a multipurpose hall that Jaehyun’s parents rented solely for the event. He didn’t ask how much it cost them. He might not fall asleep trying to compute that much money.
While the party is yet to formally begin, his parents assist the guests that are still coming in. Jaehyun leaves them to it since he doesn’t know the majority of his parents’ friends, and takes his seat beside Taeyong.
Taeyong got frustrated about his necktie so they just bought him a bowtie yesterday. To Jaehyun, Taeyong just looked even better with it. He suggested for his boyfriend to style his hair to a side-swept so now, Jaehyun is suffering from how criminally handsome Taeyong is.
Sensing his staring, Taeyong puts the empty wine glass down and grins. “I’m not gonna take it home.”
I’m going to take you home— Jaehyun clears his throat. “Do you want to meet my grandma first? While she’s alone at their table.”
Taeyong looks behind him. “What if she doesn’t like me?”
“What’s not to like about you?” Taking Taeyong’s hand, Jaehyun excuses themselves from Taeyong’s mother and takes his boyfriend to where his paternal grandmother is. “Halmeoni…”
“Oh—” The old woman shuts her fan. “Are you going to sit with us?”
“Um, no—but I have someone to introduce to you.” Jaehyun slings an arm around Taeyong’s shoulder, smiling. “This is Taeyong, my boyfriend. Remember the boy I met back then that I wouldn’t stop talking about on video calls?”
The old woman gasps loudly, hands on her chest. “Omo—is this him?! How did you find someone so handsome?! Taeyong, come here, give me a hug!”
Sheepishly, Taeyong embraces her. “It’s nice to meet you, halmeoni.”
“Sit down, you two. Oh, I’m so happy! Do you also go to SOPA?”
Taeyong nods. “But we’re not classmates this year, and I’m a dance major.”
“Wow, you must be really graceful. Pardon me, I didn’t expect you to be this good-looking. I feel like I’m talking to a doll! You’re a perfect match! Mind if I take a picture? I’ll only be here until next week so I want to make a lot of memories before I go back to Connecticut.”
Shyly, Taeyong scoots closer to Jaehyun. Jaehyun then boldly presses a kiss to his cheek, giggling as his grandmother laughs joyously.
“Sweet, young love. You remind me of my late husband and I’s youth. We were also so obsessed with each other. I guess my grandson took after us. Tell me more about yourself, Taeyong. When I go back to the US, I’ll buy a lot of gifts!”
Jaehyun whispers, placing a hand on his boyfriend’s thigh. “She’s going to pamper you now.”
Taeyong grasps his hand, and starts to talk about how much he likes baking with his mother.
Predictably, Jaehyun’s grandmother perks up even more. She loves baking, and he’s sure that she’ll ask Taeyong to accompany her to his mother’s bakery one of these days.
The old woman asks to be transferred to their table, and begins chatting up Taeyong’s mother instead. All of the expected guests eventually arrive, and Jaehyun’s aunt starts the party by calling him up to give an opening speech.
He’s never been shy of being in the spotlight. As a music major, Jaehyun is required to perform in front of a crowd to boost his self-confidence. He takes the microphone from his aunt and gently taps it, taking out a copy of his speech so he won’t forget what to say.
“Good evening. I’d like to talk about my parents’ love for each other, and how they took good care of their only son. When I was young, my parents would always show me pictures of them when they were still dating. They were also childhood friends before falling in love with each other, like my boyfriend and I.” He flashes a shy smile at Taeyong. “They were inseparable, they said. I was too young to remember all the stories, but one thing I will never forget about my parents’ love is how they never crumbled under the pressure of obstacles, how they withstood troubles and conquered everything hand in hand.
“My parents’ love knows no boundaries. It doesn’t expire. They love each other like they’re a new couple. They look at each other like it was only yesterday when they exchanged vows. They smile at each other like they don’t see anyone else. They work so well together that nothing will break them apart.
“When they’re laughing with each other, when my father kisses my mother before leaving for work, when my mother welcomes him back home with a tight hug, I always tell myself that what they have for each other is one of a kind. In the age where falling apart and being unfaithful is getting more and more popular, they’re the model of everlasting love.
“And thanks to their love for each other that they raised me very well. Not only are they a perfect couple, but they’re a flawless pair of parents too. Never did they stunt my potential, always encouraging me and allowing me to discover things about myself, and telling me that they will always support my dreams. I never felt like I couldn’t be my true self with them. They deserve to be respected. I will always dedicate my success to them because without my parents’ faith in me, I wouldn’t be able to achieve my goals. Happy 25th anniversary mom, dad. I love you.”
Giving the microphone back to his aunt, Jaehyun walks over to the piano to play a song for his parents’ couple dance.
Conveniently, the instrument is placed where he can look at Taeyong every now and then. As he presses the keys and lets the notes flow, he meets Taeyong’s soft gaze. He knows that the night is for his parents, but he is unable to stop his heart from singing to his boyfriend.
Wise men say
Only fools rush in
But I can’t help falling in love with you
Shall I stay?
Would it be a sin
If I can’t help falling in love with you?
He wants what his parents have. He wants it for him and Taeyong. The kind of love that bows to no one, the kind of love that bends for no rule. The kind of love that stands sturdy through the storm, the kind of love that stretches for thousands of miles.
Like a river flows
Surely to the sea
Darling, so it goes
Some things are meant to be
Singing is his passion. He loves it more than his dream of going to the moon, or working on machinery. And he hopes that he and Taeyong will remain strong together even as he pursues something that’ll take him oceans apart from his soulmate.
Take my hand
Take my whole life, too
For I can’t help falling in love with you
Taeyong’s mouths the words that he himself loves hearing from Jaehyun, eyes glassy.
He comes to a decision. He’d waited for Taeyong for a decade, and Taeyong’s heart has been with him for just as long. Their love won’t wither like a flower out of season.
For I can’t help falling in love with you…
They give him an applause as the last note fades. Jaehyun leaves as someone takes over the piano, and walks over to Taeyong holding out a hand.
Eyes sparkling, Taeyong takes it. They join the guests in the middle, dancing with the main couple of the night.
With one of his hands on Taeyong’s waist, Jaehyun smiles lovingly as they sway to a slow rendition of Can’t Take My Eyes Off of You.
“You didn’t even look at the keys while playing, but here you are, staring unblinkingly at me.”
“I know that song by heart.”
“Then going by that logic, does your heart not know me as much as it knows your music?”
“None of my songs hold a candle to you. I might forget everything, but you will always occupy my mind and my heart. But even so, I always want to see you, to hear you, to hold you, because that’s how greedy I am when it comes to you. I could lose everything else and get back on my feet, but I will stop living without you.”
Taeyong cups his cheek. “You’re too much. How could an 18 year-old talk like this? What kind of books are you reading?”
Nuzzling Taeyong’s palm, Jaehyun plants a kiss on it. “You underestimate my love for you.” His smile wanes as he holds Taeyong’s gaze. “I already know where I’m going.”
Taeyong kisses his forehead sweetly. “Go after what you really want. I won’t hold you back.”
“I love you always.”
Their lips meet in a one in a million kiss.
They get bored of the party and decide to leave ahead of everyone two hours later. Taeyong’s mother promises her son that she can go home by herself so Taeyong follows Jaehyun out of the venue, agreeing to work on the puzzle with him.
Jaehyun puts their shoes on the rack. “Get changed out of your suit first.”
“Do I have clothes here?”
“You left a few pairs of them.”
Going to his room, he takes some clothes out of the closet and sets them on the bed for his boyfriend. “You can change in the bath—”
A pair of arms embrace him from behind.
“Yongie…?”
“I don’t want to do the puzzle,” Taeyong murmurs against his shoulder.
“Okay, we can do something else. What do you want—”
“You.”
For a moment, he doesn’t move or breathe. Jaehyun slowly turns in Taeyong’s hold, heart rate picking up at the sight of Taeyong’s blushing face. “What do you mean…?”
He already knows what Taeyong is going to say even before the latter opens his mouth.
“I’ve been thinking about it…even before we started dating. And nobody’s here, so… Can we…? I know you want it too.”
His breath catches in his throat. “Are you sure…? M-my parents won’t be home for a while, but…do you really wanna do it with me…?”
Taeyong is so shy he can’t even meet Jaehyun’s eyes, yet nothing in his body language tells that he is not a hundred percent sure.
“Fuck—okay, um… I don’t know what to do first. How far do you want us to go?”
“All the way.”
Jaehyun instantly pops a boner. Pulling out of Taeyong’s hug, he opens his drawer and fishes out a box of condoms as well as a bottle of lube. “I…well, I sneaked outside the other night because I thought we might need it soon.”
Seeing the items in his hands, Taeyong’s previous bashful countenance becomes mischievous. “You didn’t even me over just to do the puzzle, did you? Or were you talking about…our bodies joining like puzzle pieces?”
Jaehyun’s heart stops beating for a second. “You’re gonna kill me.”
Giggling, Taeyong takes the condom and the lube from him and gets on the bed, pulling him forward.
Moist lips press against Jaehyun’s and oh god, he’s about to have sex with Taeyong. Finally, his dreams are coming to life.
Hovering above his boyfriend, Jaehyun removes Taeyong’s suit jacket before unbuttoning his shirt with shaky hands. Blood pounds in his ears as he tosses them off the bed, fingers steadily trembling as he tries to unzip his trousers. “Shit—”
“Let me.” Taeyong helps him out of his jacket and shirt before pushing him down and unzipping his fly in one swift tug. Grabbing the waistband of his pants, Taeyong drags it over his legs and flings the material to the floor before discarding his own trousers.
Jaehyun’s eyes bulge when Taeyong takes off his underwear too. Naturally, his gaze darts towards Taeyong’s already half hard cock. “…I’m afraid I’m not going to last long.”
“It’s okay! We have lots of time to practice.” Taeyong winks cheekily before swooping down to claim his lips again.
As they kiss passionately, Jaehyun boldly licks Taeyong’s lower lip and whimpers at the first touch of their tongues. That’s when Taeyong chooses to hump him—it startles him so much he accidentally bites down Taeyong’s tongue, panicking as his boyfriend winces. “Fuck, I’m sorry!”
Taeyong touches the tip of his tongue and shrugs. “Relax, you didn’t bite it off. It’s not bleeding, see?” His reassuring smile falters as he grinds down again, muffling his groans against Jaehyun’s collarbone. “Ahh…”
These sounds are going to leave Jaehyun mad with want by the end of the night. Bucking his hips to meet the roll of Taeyong’s hips, Jaehyun grips his boyfriend’s waist and lets out a shuddering breath as his clothed crotch rubs Taeyong’s bare cock. “So good…”
“Yeah…?” Taeyong starts peppering kisses on his neck, and licks a stripe from the base of his throat up the shell of his ear. “What if your parents suddenly come home…?”
“T-they won’t. They’re busy partying…”
“Suppose they’ll be too busy being all over each other, too.”
“Don’t talk about them like that while we’re—”
Chuckling, Taeyong sucks on his earlobe momentarily before kissing down his neck. “Do you want me to lick your nipples?”
Why does Taeyong have to ask such things so casually? Can’t he see how fragile Jaehyun is? He will mentally break. “Do whatever you want.”
“Thank you, baby. Later, I want you to jerk me off while fingering me.”
He should probably gag Taeyong to keep him from spouting filth.
Taeyong places a kiss on each nipple before sucking the one on the right, thumbing its twin.
Jaehyun’s pupils dilate with desire as he watches Taeyong, fingers carding through Taeyong’s hair. He catches a glimpse of Taeyong’s slick tongue circling the hardened nub of his nipple and it’s so obscene he feels his face melt.
A deep groan escapes him as Taeyong sucks hard on the left teat, making it swell.
“You can do this to me too if you want.”
Jaehyun shivers as Taeyong makes his way down, leaving kisses on his wake. That sinful tongue makes its appearance once again when Taeyong gives the trail of hair past his navel a long, sensual lick.
Where did his boyfriend learn these?
The question leaves his mouth when Taeyong gets rid of his boxers, letting his cock spring free. “Have you been watching porn…?”
“Who doesn’t?” Parting his legs, Taeyong eyes his cock closely like a specimen, bending it here and there. “Hm…”
“Don’t stare at it like that!”
“But it’s so…big. So thick and long. Look, it even has an angry vein right here. Mine is smoother, if you like that.” Grabbing the bottle of flavored lube, Taeyong squirts a dollop on his hand. “I’m not going to be really good at this, but I promise not to bite you.”
Holy mother of god.
Jaehyun inhales sharply as Taeyong strokes him. He’s never been touched like this by anyone else and somehow, it feels even better than when he does it. Taeyong spreads the lube up and down his length, and Jaehyun grips the sheets as his boyfriend’s tongue flickers over the head of his cock. “Hnggg…”
Taeyong jerks him off while kissing around his cockhead. “You’re not gonna come yet, are you?”
“I might…”
“Okay, if you feel like it then you can come in my mouth. I’m really curious about what you taste like.” Taeyong pecks the swollen tip before wrapping his lips around it.
“Fuck—Taeyong—” One hand shoots up to grab a handful of Taeyong’s hair. Jaehyun mewls as Taeyong bobs his head, mouth only taking in half of his length. “Oh, fuck—your mouth is so hot…”
Taeyong pumps himself with the remnant of lube that sticks to his palm, whining. It sends a delicious surge straight to Jaehyun’s cock. His sucking is obviously inexperienced, but at least he is careful of his teeth scraping Jaehyun’s shaft.
Heat builds up fast in Jaehyun’s belly. “Taeyong, please…”
Glancing up at him with a mouth full of throbbing cock, Taeyong bobs his head faster and sends Jaehyun to cloud nine with a single lick on his oozing slit.
Even if he wants to hold it in a bit longer, Jaehyun easily surrenders to the force of his orgasm and spills into Taeyong’s mouth, moaning. “Fuck—shit—”
He’s pumping a lot of cum that Taeyong has no choice but to pull away and swallow what he caught. Brows furrowing, Taeyong watches his cock twitch and spurt more strings of white. “Not bad…”
Shame envelopes Jaehyun through the high. He reaches for Taeyong and licks into his boyfriend’s mouth, moaning at his own taste. It’s so dirty, but it doesn’t gross him out. Rather, it makes him rut against Taeyong while groping his boyfriend’s small ass. “Taeyong—”
Hips rocking faster, Taeyong mewls. “Fuck…Jaehyun, make me come…”
Following his instincts, Jaehyun parts Taeyong’s ass cheeks and presses a finger against his entrance, rubbing it. That does the trick—Taeyong quivers as he comes on Jaehyun’s stomach, shamelessly grinding.
“Yes, yes… Oooh…”
Jaehyun drinks Taeyong’s moans. He lets Taeyong rut against him, swiping his boyfriend’s cum to have a taste of it. “…You had too much apple juice.”
Taeyong giggles and pecks his cheek, hips slowing down. He then gets off of Jaehyun to pick a shirt off the floor and use it to wipe them dry. “Don’t let it sit too long on your skin or it’ll itch.”
Maybe it’s the magic of orgasm, but Jaehyun swears that Taeyong is glowing right now. He pulls Taeyong to his chest once his boyfriend is done cleaning them and kisses Taeyong’s forehead. “How was it…?”
“I should be asking you that.”
“It was really good but I wish I lasted longer…”
“You probably don’t masturbate as much as I do.”
The gears in Jaehyun’s head halt. “…How many times do you do it?”
“Almost everyday?” Mindlessly, Taeyong tweaks his nipples. “But not before going to school because I’d be late. I watch stuff and imagine us on the screen.”
Sighing, Jaehyun cradles Taeyong tightly. “I’m so in love with you.”
“Sappy baby. But save the sweet nothings for later because we’re not done yet. Told you I wanted to go all the way, right…?”
They take a rest for a few minutes while looking up positions they can try next time. Jaehyun scrolls through the illustrations, smiling as Taeyong kisses the side of his neck. “You want to bottom?”
“For now, yes But if you want to switch, I could top you.”
“I think I prefer being on top.”
“Okay, good for me.” Taeyong pinches his nipple before handing the lube to him. “You might wanna get to it now. Or do you need more time?”
Jaehyun doesn’t want to humiliate himself more than he already did. Plus he knows he will be hard again once he starts fingering Taeyong.
Kneeling between his boyfriend’s legs, Jaehyun stares like a hawk at Taeyong’s hole as he tries to put lube on his fingers. The glob hits the mattress. “Ugh.”
“Eyes on the prize but don’t lose focus, Hyunie.”
Scooping the glob of lube, he puts the bottle next to him and dips his head to kiss Taeyong’s cock. A second later, he drags his lips to Taeyong’s chest and sucks on the puffy nipples while his slick fingers rub Taeyong’s entrance.
“Mm…Careful, Jaehyun. My nipples are sensitive.”
Taeyong must like playing with his nipples too. Has he fingered himself before? Surely, if he already knows he wants to bottom. Sucking on the teats, Jaehyun wraps his free hand around Taeyong’s cock and finally pushes his pointer in, dipping it to the last knuckle.
“Aah…”
It doesn’t seem like Taeyong is in pain so he starts sliding his finger in and out while kissing Taeyong, bruising his lips with sucks and bites. It goes on for a while until Taeyong asks him to add another finger, so Jaehyun inserts one more next to his pointer, prodding Taeyong’s walls. “How—how many have you tried shoving up in here…?”
Taeyong keens, spreading his legs even wider. “Three—”
His cock twitches at the thought of Taeyong fucking himself with those fingers. Jaehyun spoils Taeyong’s nipples again until they’re brightly glistening with spit, fingers curling as he recalls a specific illustration.
It shouldn’t be hard to find, nestled a bit up the—
“Fuck! R-right there!”
Jaehyun lifts his head in shock. That easy? So that’s where he should aim his cock once it invades Taeyong’s body. He jabs his fingers there repeatedly, addicted to the sound of Taeyong’s wanton moans. The third finger makes Taeyong writhe, stretching his hole wider for Jaehyun’s girth.
“You’re so sexy,” Jaehyun whispers as he watches his fingers.
“God, you make me feel so—Jaehyun, please, put it in now—Wanna come on your cock—”
Never will he get used to Taeyong being so vulgar. Jaehyun gently pulls his fingers out, wiping them on the sheets before taking out a condom from its box. He’s shaking again but he smoothly puts it on, glad that it fits him.
He coats his cock well to lessen the pain of the intrusion. Spreading Taeyong’s legs again, he presses the blunt head of his cock against Taeyong’s loose entrance, rubbing it. “Are you sure you want me to…?”
“I’m going to stop talking to you if you don’t fuck me tonight.”
Props to Taeyong for threatening him with his greatest fear.
Gripping the base of his cock, he pushes in. But Taeyong is still so fucking tight he might snap Jaehyun’s cock off. “Baby, it won’t fit…”
“It will! I just—I just need to relax more, okay? Wait a sec.” Sniffling, Taeyong takes a few deep breaths to calm down. “Okay, let’s try again.”
Stroking Taeyong’s cock to alleviate the pain, Jaehyun keeps his eyes on Taeyong’s hole for a hint of blood. Whatever Taeyong says, he will pull out the second he sees a smear of it.
He curses under his breath as he finally bottoms out, dragging a mewl out of Taeyong.
His boyfriend braces himself on his elbows, raising his head to take a look at where they are connected. “Wow… You’re all the way in. I can certainly feel that. My ass burns, but it’ll be okay. So don’t think of pulling out.”
“I won’t, I won’t.” Caressing Taeyong’s thighs, Jaehyun leans down to meet Taeyong for a chaste kiss. “Tell me if I can move already…”
God forbid he comes without even thrusting once.
“Go on, I can take it.”
Pushing Taeyong down, Jaehyun pulls back until only the head is inside before pushing in slowly, grunting. He does it again and again and soon he’s keeping up a steady pace albeit slow, not wanting to release as quickly as he did earlier. “So tight…”
Wrapping his legs around his waist, Taeyong pulls him down and hungrily kisses him, whining and whimpering. “Do it faster…”
Jaehyun obeys immediately. Hips snapping faster, he goes even deeper and eventually hits the spot that has Taeyong throwing his head back in bliss. The pleasure ripples through his body as he gets the hang of it, slamming his cock into Taeyong earnestly.
Moans bounce against the walls of his bedroom.
“Fuck, Taeyong… It’s so good…”
Taeyong blabbers incoherently while bucking his hips to meet Jaehyun’s thrusts. “Oooh, Jaehyun…! Please…! Faster!”
Bracing his hands on the bed, Jaehyun drives his cock into Taeyong wildly, balls slapping Taeyong’s ass. His bed squeaks under the weight of their thwacking bodies. “Uh, uh, uh—I’m gonna come again—”
“Me too baby, fuck—let’s do it together—”
Fingers enclosing Taeyong’s cock, Jaehyun pumps it rapidly as Taeyong claws down his back.
“Jaehyun!”
The first spurt of Taeyong’s cum hits his chin. The walls around his cock clamps down so hard that he releases in the condom soon, hips thrusting erratically. “Fuck, yes—”
Their bodies undulate as they ride out their orgasms. Jaehyun indulges with a few kisses from Taeyong, hands caresses Taeyong’s sides while his cock throbs in the clutch of Taeyong’s ass.
“I love you so much… You’re the best boyfriend ever.”
“…I’ll be your only boyfriend anyway.” Laughing softly, Taeyong pecks the corner of his mouth. “I love you. Thank you for being my first.”
Jaehyun would love to stay inside Taeyong for a bit longer but it might be uncomfortable, so he reluctantly withdraws and ties the condom, throwing it in the bin in the bathroom. He comes back to scoop Taeyong out of bed.
“Oi! Where are we going?!”
“We’re taking a shower…?”
“But… we’re going to do it again, right?”
Speechless, Jaehyun puts his boyfriend down and smacks his ass as Taeyong walks into the bathroom before him. “We can just wipe down for now…”
He ends up sucking Taeyong off, and fulfilling that second round 30 minutes later.
SOPA’s gates reopen a day after Jaehyun’s birthday, two weeks before graduation. The remaining days will be for several symposiums, and graduation practice.
Jaehyun attends a program organized by the student council. It is not mandatory, but he comes to watch the intermission number of Taeyong’s dance crew.
Sitting amongst the audience, Jaehyun watches in admiration. How could a human being dance the way Taeyong does? He hits every beat, and his facial expressions are on point. Jaehyun wishes that Taeyong will get famous one day so he can tour around the world and show everyone what real dancing is.
Noting how flexible his boyfriend is, Jaehyun looks down as he wrings his hands. Speaking of Taeyong’s flexibility, they haven’t found the time again to be alone together, for Jaehyun to test how far Taeyong’s legs can go if he parts them. They probably won’t do it again until that trip to Jeju after graduation. And when it happens, he’ll make Taeyong put the hair clips on.
He leaves his seat to look for Taeyong the second the seminar ends. Assuming that his boyfriend will be with his crew, Jaehyun goes to the dance studio.
Taeyong is currently speaking to his team when he gets there, and he looks like he’s going to cry. When Taeyong joined the crew in his freshman year, they were so impressed by his audition that he got appointed as one of the leaders. He became so well-liked and respected by the crew, and it’s probably hard to leave them since they’ve become Taeyong’s friends, too.
Jaehyun patiently waits outside. The crew does a group hug before the members file out of the room one by one with sadness written in their eyes. Meeting Taeyong’s gaze through the window, Jaehyun grins and enters the studio to ruffle his boyfriend’s hair.
“I’m proud of you.”
“I’d be upset if you weren’t. Help me clean up the room?”
With nothing else to do, Jaehyun stacks up the chairs and pushes them to the corner of the room before grabbing the broom. He looks up as Taeyong begins erasing the board. “What do you write there?”
“Positions, blockings, sometimes it’s hard to explain without drawing it. And we list down songs we would vote on and use for the performances.”
Diligently, Jaehyun sweeps the floor and dumps the dirt in the bin. Taeyong ties the garbage bag as he puts the broom aside.
But before Taeyong can take a step away, he grabs him and pushes him against the wall, swallowing Taeyong’s protest with a deep kiss.
“Jaehyun, I’m sweaty!”
“Don’t care. I missed you so much.”
Giving in, Taeyong drops the bag and pulls him closer.
They don’t know how long they’ve been making out when someone knocks on the door loudly, making them jump away from each other.
The guy that Taeyong rejected at Sky Rose Garden stands by the doorway, dumbstruck.
“…I was looking for you. The whole class is thinking of going to the beach after graduation.”
Taeyong uselessly tries to fix himself. “I’ll join you guys soon. Just gotta throw the thrash and surrender the keys to the office.”
“Do you not know that you can’t do that here?”
“Make out?” Jaehyun reacts before Taeyong, scowling. “We do. We just forgot about it.”
“Well, I know we’re graduating soon but if you get caught, they might take you out of the list.”
“For kissing?”
“I don’t know. We’ll see when I tell the dean.”
Losing his cool, Jaehyun storms over and grabs him by the collar, ignoring Taeyong’s call. “I know you can’t take rejection like a man but if someone is gonna get in trouble today, it’s neither me nor Taeyong. Got it?”
Shoving him back, Taeyong’s classmate scoffs at him before stomping away like a brat.
“Jaehyun, why did you do that?”
“Why wouldn’t I? Did you not hear what he just said?”
“He’s just pissed I wouldn’t reply to his texts.”
Jaehyun frowns at Taeyong. “He’s texting you? Why didn’t I know that?”
“Because it wasn’t important.” Picking up the garbage bag, Taeyong leaves it outside of the studio for a janitor to take. “I was handling it well.”
“Obviously not if he wouldn’t stop bothering you.”
Taeyong huffs. “Okay, fine. But charging up to him was really unnecessary. Getting caught kissing is not enough to actually keep us from graduating, you know.”
“That guy makes my blood boil.”
“…Are you still jealous of him? And please don’t deny it. I knew you were lying to me at the garden.”
Shoulders sagging, Jaehyun plops down the floor holding his head.
“I’m sorry, Taeyong. I’m going away, and now that I know he wouldn’t leave you alone, I’m worried again. What if he tries to contact you when I’m gone?”
“I’ll block his number now,” Taeyong says, sitting in front of him.
“What if he visits you on campus? Where is he attending?”
“I don’t know and I really don’t give a shit, Jaehyun. If he tries to talk to me again, I’ll just keep turning him down. Are you worried I might actually give in and date him?”
Hearing it out loud slaps Jaehyun with guilt.
Taeyong rubs his face in disappointment. “It upsets me that you’d think I’d do that.” Taking one of his hands, Taeyong squeezes it. “I’m not going to leave you for someone nearby. I will love you and only you, okay? Do you trust me?”
Jaehyun nods, contrite.
“What would you feel if the tables turned? If I were the one suspecting you of replacing me?”
“That’s absurd. I’ll never do that…”
“See? We need to trust each other. It won’t be easy to be apart but we’ll do our best, and it won’t help if we’re going to get jealous for nothing. I don’t want to fight over things like this, Jaehyun.”
“I’m sorry. I’m not gonna be jealous again…”
“Good. I will never give you a reason to be jealous. I love you, and it will always be you for me.”
Jaehyun throws himself at Taeyong, nuzzling his boyfriend’s neck. “You stink.”
“Dude, you didn’t mind it when you were trying to shove your tongue down my throat.”
Pouting, Jaehyun stands and pulls Taeyong up with him.
He’s not going to worry about that guy anymore but if he finds out that the bastard is still pestering Taeyong, he’ll find ways to teach him a lesson all the way from Massachusetts.
Senior students gather at the gymnasium for their graduation. Jaehyun snaps a few pictures of Taeyong as his boyfriend gets called on stage to receive his diploma. Then he sneaks out of his row to follow Taeyong to his seat, asking the girl sitting next to Taeyong to switch places with him. Catching the roach’s stink eye, Jaehyun spitefully holds Taeyong’s hand through the rest of the ceremony. Taeyong simply shakes his head at him.
Afterwards, they join their parents for a celebratory lunch at Wolfgang Steakhouse. Jaehyun initially wanted to go straight home and cuddle Taeyong but even he knew how ridiculous that was. His stomach was rumbling the loudest on the way to the restaurant.
Picking up Taeyong’s knife, he cuts his boyfriend’s steak into small pieces. “This okay?”
“I have hands, Jaehyun.”
“I can see that. Eat well, Yongie.”
His mother snickers. “Should we give them our gifts now?”
“Isn’t it the Jeju trip?”
“The Jeju trip is our gift to you as a couple. We prepared separate gifts for your graduation. Let’s see Taeyong’s first!”
Taeyong huffs, halfheartedly glaring at his mother. “Mom, I told you I didn’t need one.”
She only pats his cheek, smiling. “I know, but I wanted to. Also, I’d been saving for this since you started high school. I only have a picture right now, but we can pick it up later so you can try it. But first—you need to get your license.”
Jaehyun shrugs as Taeyong glances at him, gawking.
“Mom, what the heck did you get me?”
“Shhh, it’s nothing special.”
The nothing special is a sleek black badass bike. Taeyong nearly slides off his chair.
“It’s not brand new, but it’ll take you to class and back home faster. Aren’t young men into big bikes like this nowadays?”
Lip wobbling, Taeyong leaves his seat to give his mother a quick, tight hug.
Grinning, Jaehyun squirms excitedly in his seat. He can’t wait to see Taeyong get on that bike. His boyfriend is going to be even hotter and he will benefit greatly from it.
His father then casually slides a key over the table towards him. “Happy Graduation.”
“…What, am I getting a bike too?”
“No, but you’re getting an apartment close to school so you won’t have to take public transit. I guess you still have to learn how to drive, though.”
Jaehyun’s jaw drops as he picks up the key. “An actual apartment just for me?”
“We’ll stay there too whenever we’ll visit you,” his mother says. “It’s a two-bedroom apartment, and your grandma spent a lot on it.”
No, his parents can book a hotel room instead. Jaehyun turns to Taeyong, practically bouncing in his seat. “Come with them when they visit me!”
His parents exchange looks. Seems like Taeyong will always be Jaehyun’s first priority.
They talk about the things Jaehyun must prepare before flying to the US. It’s still 6 months away but there’s a lot of documents to process, and he must get to them as soon as possible.
“I’ll miss Korea a lot.”
And all of the memories he made since they moved 11 years ago. The best aspects of his life are here.
“Is it safe to assume you’ll miss me the most?”
There’s not a hint of sadness in Taeyong’s eyes when he looks into them, only mirth. Reaching for his boyfriend’s hand, Jaehyun locks their fingers under the table.
Taeyong knows. Their hearts know.
Taeyong’s fall re-admission schedule coincides with Jaehyun’s departure so they stop by at his university first to let him register. Jaehyun accompanies Taeyong into the building despite Taeyong telling him he should just stay in the car.
Sitting at the waiting area outside the registrar’s office, he waits for Taeyong. Watching his boyfriend speak to the woman behind the glass, taking papers that have been stamped with the university’s seal.
Taeyong is wearing a white button down shirt, jeans, and white sneakers, a stark contrast to his street fashion in high school. It gives him an air of maturity. In that moment, he’s become a man in Jaehyun’s eyes. Gone is the playful boy from SOPA. The man before him right now has been carrying himself differently.
“Yes, probably another copy of that. I think I passed it last week.” Turning to him, Taeyong’s mouth curls to a slight smile. “You okay there?”
“…They have music programs too, right? What if I—”
“Nah, don’t you dare continue that. You’re flying out today, Jaehyun.” Thanking the woman, Taeyong shoves the papers in his envelope before bonking Jaehyun’s head. “You’re not exchanging Berklee College of Music for this. I know this is a good uni too, but the one you’ll be attending in two weeks is on a whole other level.”
Jaehyun holds back a whine as he follows Taeyong back to the car.
“It’s just 4 years, and I’ll come with your parents to visit you.”
There’s nothing he can do now so he just holds on to that. It’ll keep him sane and soothe the crippling yearning.
As his parents talk about some new news he couldn’t care less about, Jaehyun spends the ride to the airport playing with Taeyong’s hands, kissing each knuckle every now and then.
“At the rate you’re going, I’m gonna feel those kisses until you return to Korea. It won’t even feel like we’ll be 14 hours apart everyday.”
“That’s the plan.” Jaehyun rests his head on Taeyong’s shoulder, unseeingly staring at the back of the driver’s seat. “Hey… Since it’ll be hard to catch each other with that huge time gap, don’t be pressured to reply to me right away. Don’t mind my spamming. I’ll also be sending you lots of voice messages.”
Taeyong pokes his forehead. “You’re gonna wake up to my 3 replies per text, and double the length of each voice message.”
“So who’s clingier between us?”
“It’s you, no doubt. I know you’re going to cry as soon as you get on the plane. You’ll probably beg the pilot to pull over and let you off.”
Laughing softly, Jaehyun meets Taeyong’s gaze. “Should I?”
“They might call the cops on you, though. Let’s not risk it. You’re going to a school in Boston, not some random Boston precinct. When I go there I want to see you on campus, not in a jail cell.”
“Fine, fine. I got the memo. Text me right away, though. I wanna talk to you during the flight.” He kisses the back of Taeyong’s hand. “I’ll make time for you.”
When Taeyong smirks, Jaehyun automatically tenses up.
“If we happen to still be up at the same time,” Taeyong whispers, lips brushing the warm shell of his ear, “let’s de-stress together. Phone sex can be amazing, too.”
He keeps his composure. Discreetly, Jaehyun checks if his parents are eavesdropping before pinching the inside of Taeyong’s thigh. “You’re a demon…”
“Your libido is abnormal.”
This is torture at its finest. He will crave Taeyong so much that by the time Taeyong comes to visit him, he’ll likely lock Taeyong in his bedroom for three consecutive days that he’ll be limping as they tour around the state.
When they reach the airport, his father helps him get his luggage out of the trunk. They won’t go in with him anymore so Jaehyun gives his parents a hug, thanking them for all their efforts, and promising to call them as soon as he lands.
Taeyong hands him three paper roses.
“I wasn’t sure if they’d let you take a bouquet on board, and your seatmate might be allergic to pollen. Plus these paper roses won’t wilt.”
Jaehyun smiles, thumbing the petals. “I’ll put one in the living room, one in my bedroom, and use the last one as a bookmark so it’ll be with me in all of my classes. In that way we’ll be—”
Taeyong’s sniffling cuts him off.
“Jaehyun, what am I gonna do without you…?”
Taeyong’s tears break his heart into smithereens, just like when he made Taeyong cry as he played with the other kids. Once again, Jaehyun hates himself. He should’ve known that behind Taeyong’s supportive smiles, his boyfriend is just as devastated as him.
Cupping Taeyong’s cheeks, he thumbs away the droplets of tears. “I’ll call you, okay? Everyday. I will never be too busy for you. I love you.”
Wiping his face, Taeyong nods. “Sorry, I didn’t want to cry but I miss you already.”
Smiling sadly, Jaehyun looks at the paper roses. Counting the petals slowly, heart slamming against his ribcage.
“…Stop making the flowers decide for you. Whatever it is you want to do, just do it.”
Chuckling, Jaehyun glances at his father and receives an encouraging nod.
“I don’t know yet if I’ll be able to fly back after a year, but…as soon as I come back, I’m going to marry you.”
“Jaehyun—”
“I’ll get you a ring. A pretty ring for a pretty boy.” Cradling Taeyong’s face, Jaehyun caresses the tear-stained cheeks. “Will you marry me?”
Taeyong’s eyes brim before he throws his arms around Jaehyun, nodding firmly.
His heart cries from joy. Jaehyun kisses the side of Taeyong’s head, and then his lips as pulls back. “We’ll get married. We’ll choose our suits together, and look for the perfect church to have our wedding.”
“Come back quickly,” Taeyong whimpers, smooching his lips repeatedly.
“I will.” Hesitantly breaking the hug, Jaehyun grabs his luggage and plants a tender kiss on Taeyong’s forehead.
“See you later, future husband.”