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Max wants to know why it’s such a big deal that it’s a Boy/Girl party when, except for Brooke Scott’s disastrous princess-themed tenth birthday, all of their parties have been co-ed.
“It’s because this isn’t gonna be like a kid party, Max,” Chloe says. “No offense.”
The party is thirteen and up only. Chloe had lobbied Juliet as hard as she could while still keeping her own invitation, to no avail. Juliet wouldn’t budge. Teens only. Max is still just twelve, months out from her next birthday.
“What’s gonna be so different about it?” Max asks, bouncing petulantly in place on the trampoline. They’re in the Caulfields’ backyard, waiting for Vanessa to call them in for dinner.
“It’s gonna have, like, kissing and shit,” Chloe says lowly, hauling herself up onto the trampoline. “And maybe booze.”
Max makes a face like ‘yuck’ and Chloe feels annoyed. “Sounds dumb.”
And, honestly, Chloe’s trying to be patient, trying to be a good friend but Max doesn’t make it easy when she’s acting like a complete dweeb. Chloe slides forward on her knees and seizes Max about the ankle, pulling the girl until she slips and falls backwards, jolting them both up in the air with the impact.
“You don’t get it, Max,” she says, lazily rolling away from Max’s half-hearted retaliatory kicks.
It’s been a weird year. Chloe’s going to Hamilton now, her first year of junior high, and Max is still at Douglas Elementary. It’s the first time since she met Max that they’ve been at different schools. Most friendships, Chloe knows, wouldn’t survive being split up like that but she and Max are special. Pirates for life. She’s not about to let anything get in the way of that.
“Explain it to me, then,” Max says at length, stretching out on her back like a starfish until her fingertips brush against Chloe’s.
Chloe opens her mouth to try and promptly shuts it again, feeling suddenly embarrassed. The truth is, she doesn’t really get it either. She knows that this is a big deal, she knows that this is going to be the kind of monumental, life-changing event that finally takes her from awkward kid to cool teenager, but she doesn’t exactly know how yet.
“I will,” Chloe promises with a lazy shrug, casting a mischievous grin Max’s way. “After the party.”
---
So, the party sucks.
First of all, it’s not even real alcohol (for which Chloe is secretly relieved), just virgin margarita mix that Juliet’s mom bought for them. No one tells Logan Robertson, and he spends the first forty minutes of the party stumbling around pretending to be drunk until Hayden pulls him aside to break the news. Logan laughs it off, claims he was in on the joke the whole time, but even Chloe feels a little sympathy. He's a jerk and all, but that was cold.
A little after nine o’clock, Juliet herds them all into her family’s cramped rumpus room and makes the boys slide the pool table over against the wall. Then, she commands them to squeeze themselves into a circle on the floor. They all obey, everyone realizing what this is.
“Spin the bottle,” Juliet announces needlessly, brandishing the empty bottle almost like a weapon. She then recites the rules of of the game, which are predictably simple: you spin and you have to kiss whoever the bottle lands on for five seconds. If you really don’t want to kiss them, you take a dare.
It’s a lot more awkward in real life than it looks in the movies, especially to start. Watching a bunch of other people kiss is… kind of weird and disgusting. But Chloe’s sure as hell not going to be remembered forever as the girl that walked out of the party in the middle of the spin the bottle game, so she stays put.
She goes four times.
First, she gets Zach Riggins, who’s chubby but handsome. He kisses her like he’s scared to do it, a brush of lips so light she barely feels it. His lips are kind of dry.
Next, Dana Ward. More people have gone by then, most of the early tension is gone from the room. It’s the first time two girls have had to go together and some of the boys start to hoot and holler. Dana rolls her eyes at them and just smiles at Chloe like they’re sharing a secret and then she kisses her on the cheek.
On the third time, she gets Logan Robertson. Chloe doesn’t hesitate and immediately cashes in her dare. They send her downstairs to ask Mr. and Mrs. Watson for “TP” for her “bungholio.” They politely direct her to the hall closet. It’s mortifying and so stupid but with everyone crouched at the top of the stairs giggling, it’s still kind of fun.
Her last spin lands on Trevor and she’s kind of relieved. They’re friends at least. They both started skating about the same time and, unlike some of the other boys, Trevor’s never tried to act like a jerk to her about it.
They shuffle in front of each other in the circle for a moment, and Chloe smiles because it’s kind of somehow more embarrassing with someone she knows. Hayden shouts at them to get on with it and she kind of shrugs and then she’s leaning forward and they’re kissing.
It’s awful.
It’s like he’s trying to eat her face. He puts his big sweaty hands on cheeks and then he slides his tongue into her mouth which has only ever happened on accidents with, like, dogs before and this is equally gross. When their five seconds are up and she backs away there’s drool on her chin, and she knows it isn’t hers.
Dana nudges her gently with an elbow when she settles down next to her in the circle and waggles her eyebrows and Chloe musters up a pretty good approximation of a cocky grin in response. Dana prompts her for a congratulatory low-five and Chloe laughs and complies.
The boys get sent home at 11pm and then the night gradually shifts even to an even rowdier slumber party without them.
“So,” Juliet starts, “Trevor.”
The entire room erupts into a fit of giggles and Chloe feels her cheeks flush. She’s pissed that she agreed to let them paint her toenails because now it feels less like a fun slumber party event and more like a nefarious trap.
“What about him?” she asks, trying to sound as cool and bored and nonchalant as possible.
“That kiss was hot,” Dana gushes, so excited her hand slips, leaving a bright pink stripe across Chloe’s big toe. “Oops.”
“Aw, Dana,” Chloe grumbles, sitting up and trying to wipe the paint away with the pad of her thumb.
“Sorry, sorry,” Dana says, swatting Chloe’s hands away and cleaning it up herself.
Juliet rolls her eyes. “So, c’mon, Chloe, dish. You guys have been hanging out a lot lately…”
“Yeah…”
“Stop playing dumb. We all saw that kiss, it was pretty intense. He’s so into you.”
Is he? Chloe wondered.
“I wish I’d gotten a kiss like that,” Stella Hill sighs.
“So romantic,” Dana says.
“I got Logan,” Stella wrinkles her nose. “Twice.”
“Logan’s kinda cute though,” Dana says, cheeks flushing just slightly.
“I guess,” Juliet snorts. “In, like, a way that a really dumb labrador is cute.”
“Hey!”
Juliet just laughs, “So, are you gonna date him?”
“I-I mean, not-” Dana stutters.
“Not you,” Juliet huffs and shifts slightly, pinning Chloe in place with her stare. “Are you and Trevor gonna get together now or what?”
Honestly, the idea has never really seemed more unappealing but they’re all looking at her like the next words out of her mouth are the most important she’ll ever speak.
Chloe laughs and pushes some of her hair behind her ear. “I’m not sure he could handle me.”
They laugh and move on and Juliet takes the opportunity to brag about kissing Hayden.
“It was like… electric,” she declares, dramatically, clearly pleased to have all the other girls so enraptured. “He’s such a good kisser.”
“You’re lucky,” Stella sighs. “Hayden is so hot.”
Juliet actually flips her hair. She preens. The other girls start talking about the boys at the party; which ones are crush-worthy and which ones are totally ick, who was a good kisser, who was a terrible kisser (Chloe holds back, Trevor’s still her friend, and besides the girls seem to have already decided he was a great kisser without her anyway).
They talk about butterflies in your stomach, and skipping heartbeats, and crushes so serious they almost make you queasy. The whole time Chloe listens, chiming in when she thinks she can crack a joke, or responding as appropriately as she can guess to whenever the spotlight falls on her, but mostly she feels lost. None of her kisses had made her feel any of that. She’s never gotten sick over a boy, never dreamily drawn his name in one of her notebooks, never really wondered if anyone liked her.
Either they’re all bullshitting, like she is, just making shit up to go along with the group, or something’s seriously wrong with her.
By the end of the night, she’s feeling lonely and exhausted. She’s known all of these girls for ages and they’re all nice enough but even after tonight she wouldn’t really call any of them friends.
She wishes Max was there.
---
Hamilton students get out at 2:35 which gives Chloe enough time to walk the four blocks it takes to get to Douglas before Max’s school day ends. If she sprints, she even has enough time to stop in at the liquor store and buy a cherry cola they can split on the way home.
She rode her skateboard to school today, so at least she doesn’t have to sprint. But it’s hot as hell, the first vestiges of summer creeping in, hanging heavy and humid in the air. When she finally makes it to Max’s school, there’s sweat trickling from her hairline.
She opens the soda and drinks half of it waiting for Max, glaring at the younger kids as they shuffle by. Max finally picks her way through the crowd, bumping her shoulder against Chloe’s and plucking the drink right out of her hands.
“Knock it off,” she says, noticing Chloe’s campaign of intimidation against her fellow Douglas students. “You remember you were here like a year ago, Ms. Junior Higher, right?”
Chloe rolls her eyes because yeah but that year is, like, so important.
They hang out at the school for another ten minutes to give the rest of the kids walking home a head start. There’s nothing more annoying than trying to skate through a bunch of little kids, and Max hates crowds anyway.
When they finally leave, it’s Max who suggests they drop in on the skatepark on their way home. Chloe’s surprised, she usually has to cajole Max into agreeing to tag along, but she agrees immediately. Anything to put more time between her and homework.
There are about a dozen kids at the park already, most of whom are high schoolers Chloe carefully avoids. Trevor and Justin are there, they skate up to greet Max and Chloe. The four of them chat for a bit and then Chloe, Trevor, and Justin skate off together, leaving Max to sit on a vacant lunch table and watch.
Chloe notices Justin’s acting weird, barely talking to Trevor and not really looking her in the eye.
“What’s up with him?” she asks.
Trevor shrugs, “Still butthurt he didn’t go to the party. He, like, asked me a billion questions about it and then stopped talking to me.”
Chloe nods sympathetically, grateful that Max wasn’t naturally dramatic.
“He’s pissed that I kissed you,” Trevor says a few minutes later. Justin still hasn’t come back, off skating in the far corner of the park by himself. “I guess he likes you.”
Chloe blinks and shrugs in response, mind racing to figure out what exactly is the right response to that. She slid her back foot to the tail of the board and kicked off into a pop shove-it to buy herself some time.
“Like that’s my fault!” Trevor continues, throwing his hands up in the air. “God, he’s so sensitive.”
“Man, everyone’s making such a big deal out of it,” Chloe complains.
“Ugh, I know.”
“Juliet, like, thinks we’re dating now,” Chloe’s not sure why she says it. She kind of immediately regrets it, because now… what? Trevor asks her out? She’s not sure she would want to say yes, but if she said no things would be weird, right? Or, Trevor thinks it's totally ridiculous and doesn’t ask her out? She might not want to date him but she doesn’t want to be rejected either.
“Juliet Watson is like the nosiest girl on earth!” Trevor laughs. He’s blushing a little, but he doesn’t really look at all nervous. “They all need to seriously get off our backs.”
Chloe agrees and that’s the end of the conversation. They go back to skating and eventually Justin joins them again. Chloe spends some time working on her grinds and really gets into a groove. On the last one, she pops off the rail with flourish, managing a kickfilp before she hits the ground. It’s quite possibly the coolest thing she’s ever done and she looks up, grinning, to see if Max caught it.
Chloe’s smile fades from her face. Max was watching Trevor the entire time.
Her stomach hurts.
---
“So you kissed Zach.”
“Yep.”
“And Dana.”
“Yeah,” Chloe frowns. “I mean, sort of.”
“And… Trevor?”
Chloe sighs. This is like the fifteenth time Max has asked her about it. “Yeah.”
“He frenched you.”
“Yeah.”
“What was it like?” Max’s eyes are wide. They’re up in Chloe’s room. The rule is Max can only stay over on weeknights if they get to sleep by 11pm.
They’re breaking that rule, of course, so they have to be quiet. Chloe’s pretty sure her mom knows what’s up, but she’s also pretty sure that her mom is sick of trying to get them to behave. Either that or dad is running interference for them again.
“I dunno,” Chloe shrugs. She’s getting sick of talking about it. “Slippery, I guess.”
“No, not that. I mean, like, kissing in general, I guess,” Max shrugs, looking a little embarrassed. “I mean, people always make such a big deal out of it. And you’ve finally done it.”
“Yeah,” Chloe repeats. “Max, it really wasn’t that big a deal.”
“You don’t, like, feel any different?”
Chloe grimaces, remembering how clueless and fucked up she felt the night of the slumber party. “No, not really. Why do you keep asking about this stuff?”
Max blushes harder now. “I dunno. I guess I just… I mean, you’re not really good at describing it.”
Chloe rolls her eyes and pushes herself into a sitting position on the bed. Next to her Max looks confused.
“Sit up, dummy,” she commands.
Cautiously, Max obeys. “What?”
“I’m gonna kiss you,” Chloe says.
“What?” Max yelps.
“Shhh,” Chloe hisses, slapping a hand over Max’s mouth. “Shut up, Maxi-pad, do you want my mom to kill us?”
Max licks her palm and Chloe drops her hand, groaning quietly in disgust. “Fucking ew, dude.”
“Don’t call me that,” Max grumbles. “And don’t put your hands on my face.”
Chloe sighs, tucking her hair behind her ear. “Look are we gonna do this or not?”
“Why?” Max frowns, twisting the sheets nervously in her hands.
"Because you won’t quit asking me about it and apparently I’m doing such a bad job explaining,” Chloe shrugs. “It’s probably better if I just show you.”
Max hesitates, probably making a mental pros and cons list a mile long in her head. The dweeb.
“Okay,” she agrees, finally, licking her lips.
Oh, Chloe blinks. She had kind of expected Max to just apologize and back off.
Well.
She’s in too deep now.
“Okay,” Chloe says, voice cracking a little bit. Goddamn puberty. Her heart’s beating a little faster than normal and she feels so dumb because she knows this isn’t a big deal. She actually knows better and she’s still getting worked up. This is just gonna be dumb and Max will be appropriately disappointed and at least she’ll finally shut up about it.
Before she can get any more nervous, Chloe leans in. She sees Max’s eyes widen right before she makes contact and she knows that she’s caught her off guard.
Max’s lips are soft and a little moist and at first they’re just motionless beneath her own. It’s kind of awkward, just both of them leaning forward in the dark, holding their lips together. But then Chloe starts to move her mouth, a little, and Max follows her lead and oh--
Oh.
Her heart stutters. Her stomach flips, but in a good way. She feels her cheeks flood with warmth.
She feels tingly all over, kinda like...
Electricity.
Chloe pulls back first, watches as Max’s eyes slowly open. They’re still close, all of the freckles on Max’s face now as vast and interesting as the constellations in the sky. How come she’s never noticed that before?
“See?” Chloe asks shakily, clenching her hands into tight fists in the fabric of her pajama pants.
“I guess you’re right,” Max says, flopping back onto the bed. She buries her face in the pillow, putting her back to Chloe. “No big deal.”
“Yeah,” Chloe lies. “No big deal.”
Shit.