Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

“So, I’m sure everybody has seen all the posts we’ve made about this stream, and I’ll admit, it’s kind of scary,” Tanner grins into the camera, stepping back to fix his tie.  “For one, hi everybody, welcome back!  It's been quite the break.  Two, I’m in a suit.  Three, I’m not at home.  Four, well, you guys can read.”

The stream title is an obvious reminder of what they had teased for the past several weeks.

MARRYING MY RIVAL LIVE ON STREAM???  SmallAnt and PointCrow wedding

Okay, maybe not that obvious.

“So, we knew that most of you guys have seen the interview by now, and we saw some rumors that there’s still beef,” Tanner explains.  “So Eric and I figured, that the best way to prove that there is no more bad blood between us, was to get married!  I’m gonna hook my stream up to Eric’s, his is the one with all the production value.”  He looks behind the camera, before nodding and addressing the stream once again.  “Heck, I gotta get ready.  See you on the other side, chat!”

—

There are cameras set up all over the venue, and Eric’s heart is beating out of his chest as he steps up to the altar.  It’s the same place where he hosted his fake funeral, except instead of a coffin, there’s an arch and a priest, well, officiant – it’s CJ.  He is a registered officiant – although Eric isn’t sure why he has to be.  Maybe to convince chat.

“You okay, Eric?”  CJ asks, stepping up and helping him fix his bowtie.

“Just, nervous, I guess.  Just coming back from a holiday, my first holiday after I began streaming, and this is the return stream?”

CJ chuckles.  “You know, it’s gonna be just fine.  We rehearsed this, didn’t we?  Tanner’s gonna walk down the aisle, I’m gonna say some words, your wedding parties are going to say some other words, you two are going to say your vows, and then you can just have fun and relax.”

“Yeah.  Yeah,” Eric nods, letting out a shaky sigh.  “It’ll be fine.”

“And we’re live in ten!”  Abby’s voice comes from behind the cameras before she scutters out into the hall, and Eric smiles as he stands there, CJ stepping back to his position as officiant.  Live, this time.  The funeral had been pre-recorded, but this?  Live on air.  If anything goes wrong, they can’t cut it out.  They’ll just have to handle it.  He clutches the bouquet in his hands, struggling not to wipe his sweaty palms on his white tuxedo pants.  He just has to have faith in the production crew.

Marrying Tanner.  It’d been a joke suggestion at first, from Abby of all people, but now that they’re here, actually having a wedding ceremony?

Not to mention Eric’s the one in a white tux (at Tanner’s suggestion, where he simultaneously had claimed that he himself would be too pale to wear the white fabric well.  Something about looking like a marble statue.  But there was no question that one of them would wear white.  Another color was never an option).  The image of the “bride”, even though he’s not the one walking down the aisle.  Tanner’s mother will be walking her son down the aisle, to ‘hand him over’.

It’s hard to estimate how embarrassed Eric will be by the end of this.  Because how can you get fake married to a guy you’ve been crushing on since you first met him?

Music starts playing, and Eric’s eyes widen for a moment as he recognizes it.  Honeylune Ridge: Escape.   But it’s not the original, no, it’s a slowed, acoustic version of it.  And now it feels like a bad idea that they didn’t coordinate on the music choices.  Because what is the reaction going to be after?

The wedding processional starts, and the first faces that show up as cameras pan across their audience are Ludwig and Dan, their best men.  Eric still can’t believe Dan made it.  He’d told Dan about the wedding, and before he could even explain that it was just a show, Dan had cut him off in the call.

“Ah, you’re moving real fast over there, lads,” Dan told him with a chuckle.  “Just tell me the date and I’ll be there.”

“Oh–” Eric cut himself off, “then, would you be my best man?  I don’t know who Tanner is picking, but–”

“Well, of course!”  Dan exclaimed.

“Than– thank you, Dan,” Eric smiled.  “I’ll send you all the details.  And… don’t take it too seriously, okay?  We don’t want it to be some extra formal ceremony.  It’s gonna be us , you know?”

“Alright, sounds good– oh, I better run, but just send me the details!”

So unless someone has filled him in after – and it was never even mentioned in the Discord server they used to communicate details – Eric isn’t sure that Dan knows it’s not actually a wedding.  Because this is just the type of thing they’d do, and also stream for content.

Behind Dan and Ludwig follow Eric’s groomsmen in one row, and Tanner’s in a second right beside them behind the respective best men.  In pairs, QT and Jacob, and then Doug and Linkus walk behind them.  They didn’t exactly have the largest wedding parties, but most of the rest of their friends are in the audience.  

After the groomsmen (and the lone bridesmaid – groomsmaid?  Eric’s not sure) comes Abby, tossing too many flower petals into the air and onto the floor and Eric starts laughing, he can’t help himself.  The nerves are almost too much.  It’s just a show.  It’s just a show.   Then, there’s Fir, with the rings carefully placed on a satin pillow.

And then, finally, Tanner and his mother.  Even with the height difference, Tanner is holding his mom’s arm as they walk down the aisle to cheers from the crowd, almost overshadowing the music.  And Eric imagines chat going absolutely crazy as well.  He sure is, and the grin on his face is so wide it almost hurts.  Because Tanner looks beautiful as he approaches.  A well-fitting deep blue suit, the mic attached to his dark tie subtle and hidden as he looks down at his mom with a smile.  And she pats his hand and looks up at him fondly.

In that moment, Eric suddenly isn’t sure SmallAntMom knows this is supposed to be a joke either.  He watches Tanner give his mom a hug, lingering for a moment before she takes her seat on the front row with the rest of Tanner’s wedding party.  Tanner walks the steps up onto the stage, and then he’s there, right in front of him, with a red carnation in his breast pocket.  A perfect match to the bouquet Eric is clutching for dear life.  Red carnations.  A smidge untraditional, but honestly, which part of this wedding is traditional?

The music slows and dies around them, and Eric makes sure the mic on his lapel stays secure before looking up at Tanner.  And there’s a smile on his face, one Eric has seen only in a handful of truly intimate moments off-stream.  Reserved, real in a way that never seems to show up on camera.  And it’s aimed at him.

“Hello, hello, everyone, welcome!” CJ announces, fixing his mic as Eric slips one hand away from the bouquet to do the same, reaching behind himself to turn it on.  Flipping his jacket over it to hide it, Eric takes a deep breath.  “As you all are aware, we are gathered here today to witness the holy union of Tanner ‘SmallAnt’ Minecraft and Eric ‘PointCrow’ Morino. We stand here to honor and celebrate the love shared between these two streamers, as they come together to start their new life with a solemn vow, surrounded by their closest family, friends and thousands of random Twitch chatters. Both Tanner and Eric are overjoyed that you are able to join us here today.  Even you, chat, at home, watching us through the freaky cameras everywhere,” he jokes to mixed laughter in the crowd, and Eric has to turn his face away from Tanner to laugh.

“This ceremony celebrates the end of your battles, and the start of your marriage.  It’s a journey of love, understanding, Pokémon challenges, perseverance, and dedication to one another that lasts through time, and through beef.  As we stand here today to mark this occasion, we must remember that what matters most is not the wedding itself, but the love and companionship you will continue to share throughout your life together.”  CJ looks up from his printed-out notes hidden in the non-descript book he’s using in place of a Bible, and he looks at the guests.

“To honor the strength of love and the role it plays in our lives, Tanner and Eric have called upon two of their nearest and dearest to share readings that have moved them.  Dan, why don’t you start?”

Dan stands up and straightens out his suit jacket, fixing his bowtie as he approaches, leaping up onto the stage (with only minimal stumbling) and heading for the stand with the microphone.

“Wow, I never thought I’d see the day these two would get their heads outta their asses and make up,” Dan begins with a laugh.  “But I’m happy to be here when they did.  You guys deserve this.”  He clears his throat.  “Now, I was told to bring a ‘reading’, and I didn’t really know what that meant, but I did some googling on the plane here and I thought I found something that really fit you guys.  It’s from The House at Pooh Corner, by A. A. Milne.”  He pulls out his phone and rests it on the stand as he looks over at Tanner and Eric.

Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind. “Pooh?” he whispered.

“Yes, Piglet?”

“Nothing,” said Piglet, taking Pooh’s hand. “I just wanted to be sure of you.”

“We’ll be Friends Forever, won’t we, Pooh?” asked Piglet.

“Even longer,” Pooh answered. “If ever there is tomorrow when we’re not together… there is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we’re apart… I’ll always be with you.”

“So, yeah, I think we all know which one of these would be Piglet, and which one prefers to be bottom nude on stream.  Congratulations, boys, for finally manning up and getting things done,” Dan grins and steps away from the stand, taking a bow before he begins moving.  The entire room roars with laughter, and Eric’s knees buckle as he tips his head back to laugh.  Coming back up to face Tanner, Eric blinks away the wetness in his eyes.  But Tanner is grinning at him, shaking his head before turning to look at Dan.  And so, they end up shoulder to shoulder instead of face to face.

As he passes Eric and Tanner on his way back to his seat, Dan pats both their shoulders with an encouraging smile.  “Congratulations,” he whispers before heading down the stairs.

Another mark in the “Dan doesn’t know it’s a bit” docket.

“Right, thank you, Dan,” CJ says, chuckling as Tanner and Eric shift apart to avoid hiding him, like they had after the booming exit to Dan’s reading.  “And then, Ludwig, why don’t you see if you can top that?”

“Oh, I think we all know who the real top is here,” Ludwig jokes, punching Tanner in the shoulder playfully as he passes, to wolf whistles from the crowd that make Eric tuck his chin down against his chest as his cheeks flash hot, turning away from the crowd.  How many times hadn’t he imagined that exact thing, in the depths of the night?

“My mom’s here, Ludwig, behave,” Tanner chides, and Eric coughs.  He’d almost forgotten about the presence of their parents.

Tanner’s hand is there, then, on his cheek, hiding them from the crowd with his torso to shield his face as he curls his fingers under his chin to lift his head to look up at him again.  Ludwig can’t even begin talking, because the movement got everyone’s attention.

“I’m okay,” Eric mouths, and Tanner nods before he lets go of Eric’s chin and pats his cheek.  And he’s not sure if it’s a loving pat, or a patronizing one.  But if he isn’t sure, neither will the people watching be.

“So, right, as soon as I heard there would be a reading, I knew I had to flex my English Literature degree,” Ludwig says, reaching into his inner jacket pocket to pull out a concerningly thick stack of paper.  “So,” he clears his throat and flicks his wrist, and the stack dramatically extends into a several feet long strip that looks more like a scroll or an overcomplicated contract than a script,  “I won’t say much, except that next time we’re doing chess-boxing, you guys better both show up.  Cuz’ you won’t let Eric get beaten in chess again, will you, Tanner?”

“Only if he’s playing against me,” Tanner banters, and Eric laughs.

“I can’t wait to say that I crushed a couple in video games.  Bros versus pros, let’s make it happen,” Ludwig continues with a grin, looking over at them.  “But, let’s not fret and put that English degree to use, hm?” 

“According to all known laws of aviation,” and the entire room fills with groans, including from Eric, Tanner, and CJ up on the stage.  But that doesn’t seem to deter Ludwig.

“There is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway, because bees don't care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Ooh, black and yellow!”

He doesn’t get further, because CJ takes matters into his own hands and snatches the microphone away from Ludwig, retreating quickly as he says “okay, yes, that’s enough, thank you, Ludwig.”

“I’m not done!”  Ludwig announces, wiggling his far-too-long script.

“Yes, you are,” CJ insists, giving him a playful glare.  “I think we’ve all heard more than enough of the Bee Movie for the rest of time.”

“Come on, CJ, please?”  Ludwig pleads.

“I think Ludwig is done,” Tanner muses dryly, and somehow, that’s the final straw for Eric to start laughing again.  His upper body shakes as he tips his head back, eyes squeezing shut.

“Not you too, SmallAnt?”  Ludwig whines.  “You’re the one that told me to go wild!”

“I didn’t think you’d be that predictable, Mister English Lit Degree,” Tanner counters.  

“Now, now, let’s not start a fight in the middle of the ceremony,” CJ mediates.  “Ludwig, sit down, we should get going.  We don’t have all day.”

Ludwig pouts, but does as he’s told and slinks back to his seat, grumbling about not being allowed to do his reading properly.  The rest of his speech trails behind him like a sad tail before he folds it back up.  CJ reattaches the microphone to the stand before leaving back to his place between Tanner and Eric as the laughter and murmurs die down.

“Now, since we don’t have time nor budget for a reception, we decided to do all the speeches now, so we leave the best for last,” CJ continues, taking back over his role as officiant.  “Each of the remaining members of the wedding party have been tasked with writing speeches, so why don’t we start off with one of Smant’s groomsmen?  Linkus, will you do the honor to start us off?”

“Me?”  Linkus asks, surprised as Jacob nudges him upright, and Linkus brushes down his suit jacket as he walks up to the stand to cheers from the crowd.  “Now, I can’t say I expected to be the first one up here, but at least we know we’re starting off strong with the best speech,” he jokes.  “No, everyone in the wedding parties are great and I’m sure they have some wonderful speeches planned.”

“Now, SmallAnt, PointCrow, or I guess I should say Tanner and Eric, I can honestly say I never thought we’d get to this point,” he continues.  “But then again, I never thought I’d move to America either, so what do I know?” Linkus quips, to spread laughter around the room.  “Getting married is a bit further, a bit faster than I expected, but given the way you always bickered like an old married couple, maybe I should have seen it coming.  Tanner, I can’t believe you managed to do the Get Married% speedrun before me, and I’ve been engaged for over a year!”

The crowd roars as Tanner shifts, sliding his hands into his pant pockets.  “I’m just built different.”  And that doesn’t exactly quiet down the room, and even in his profile, Eric can see the way he grins, ever so proud of himself.

“Hey, hey, hey, save that for the wedding night, okay?  We don’t need to see that,” Linkus adds quickly, and Eric doesn’t even try to hide his flushed features.

“And you, PointCrow, Eric, you who dare to wish to venture through life with Tanner by your side, I have only three words for you: Are you sure?”

Eric laughs and nods, but changes his mind and shakes his head, to another bark of laughter from the people around them.  He’s ready, more than, but he knows the headshake will get a better reaction.

“That’s what I thought,” he says dryly.  “Now, I would say I’m sorry for missing your last big occasion, your funeral, but at least we can prove for a fact that this is the better of the two events.  Last time you were dead, this time you’re just getting hitched.”

Eric’s jaw drops, and he looks up at Tanner, but his companion (“groom”, supposedly) only snorts.  

“No, but actually, I wish you both the best in your future, and hope that out of this, the content will just get better and better.  Good luck, both of you.  You’ll need it.”  Linkus steps away from the stand and walks over to them, patting their shoulders before making his way back to his seat.

“Right, thank you, Linkus,” CJ hums to get people’s attention, and to settle the applause.  “Our next speaker will be the one rated ‘least likely to actually show up on the wedding day’, and no, it isn’t SmallAnt.  It’s Doug!”

Eric looks over at the side of the room with his guests, and sees Doug stand up and walk towards the stage.  But instead of taking the stairs like everyone else so far had, he just walks straight forward and jumps onto the stage, seeming unphased as he continues towards the stand.

“I’m homophobic, so I’m not enjoying this.  Congratulations, but I’m out.”  And he moves to leave the stand, to the open-faced disbelief of everyone around him.  Doug is halfway across the stage when he starts laughing and turns around, heading back to the mic.  He pulls out a piece of paper and unfolds it, and unfolds it again, and then a third time, all in the awkward silence of the out of pocket joke.  But Eric really shouldn’t be surprised.  The first time he’d met the guy in real life, he’d been offered up yellow liquid in a urine sample jar and been told to drink it.  Which he had.  

Still, that wasn’t on his bingo card.

“That was a joke, by the way, you know I’m here for all the gays.  As long as they aren’t going for me.”  Doug clears his throat and smoothes out his speech.

“The last time I stood here, I said it was an honor to celebrate the life of Eric PointCrow,” he begins.  “I take that back.  It wasn’t an honor, it was a disgrace, to know that not even a year later, we would be gathered here again, forced to make another speech about how great, and short, Eric is.”

The cheap shot about his height is nothing new, and Eric just rolls his eyes.  It’s Doug.

“And as much as I would love to repeat all the virginity jokes I made at Eric’s expense back then, seeing him stand there alongside the streamer that so obviously screwed him, I take it back.”

Tanner’s face scrunches up, and from this angle, Eric can’t tell if it’s amusement or discontent for the joke.  He hopes it’s amusement, because he wants them to be able to joke about what happened instead of lingering on it, like pressing down on a bruise that refuses to go away.

“So Eric’s no longer a virgin, and he jumped straight into marriage with the first guy that looked at him twice.  It’s like marrying your high school sweetheart, only you’re 10 years too late and your high school sweetheart was so nerdy that he broke both his hands playing video games.  But then again, you got tendonitis playing with a calculator, so I guess you’re a match made at the doctor’s office.”

Eric snorts, even as his left hand shifts from the hold on the flowers to rub his right wrist in painful remembrance.

“SmallAnt is probably best known as the pencil sharpening guy, which is weird, because you’d think that in the three years since, he would have done something else notable enough to be known for,” Doug says, looking over at the pair of streamers, and Eric laughs.  “With a Human Benchmark test score so high that they had to literally make everyone else look bad in the Greatest Gamer competition, you would think Tanner would have gone further than a college dropout.  It’s hard to believe he’s marrying up when he’s being wedded to Eric and his useless engineering degree.”

“I guess Tanner can now be known as the 10th best gamer in the world, who married someone that wasn’t even on the scoreboard.  And, coupled with Eric’s stature, he would therefore be the guy that married both up and down the social ladder at the same time.  An impressive feat, to be sure, but that just shows Eric’s range.”

Doug folds his piece of paper again and tucks it away into his inner jacket pocket.  “It’s an honor to be here on your wedding day, Eric PointCrow, Tanner SmallAnt.  May your streams be ever more successful, and perhaps more original, now that you’re able to knock your two braincells together for something new, as opposed to leeching off each other.  But hey, at least you’ve got practice sucking each other’s dicks.”  And he leaves the stage the same way he came, without approaching them first and instead just jumping down and heading for his seat.

The crowd has flipped between stunned, slack-jawed silence and roaring laughter during Doug’s entire speech, and even CJ seems like he needs some time to compose himself.  When Eric looks back at him, he sees him wiping his face, and he gets it.

—

They’re halfway through the speeches – well, roasts, are what they are – and Tanner’s getting impatient.  He’s never been one for a roast, even though part of him wishes he’d been there during Eric’s “funeral”.  He just doesn’t think he’d do a good job of it.  The weight of his prepared vows weighs heavy on the inside of his jacket.  And he doesn’t know if his vows will be received well at all.  He hopes they will.  Even now, they spin and twirl in his head, pressing against the back of his teeth to come out, but it’s not the time.

“And now, the most white-haired streamer, that somehow doesn’t want to dye his hair to hide his age, everybody, give it up for Jacob!” CJ announces, and Tanner turns his head to check on Eric.  There’s a wide grin on his face and Tanner’s heart flutters.

A wedding.  Marriage for the stream.  Getting married, just for the content.  His mom had walked him down the rows of chairs and asked him to bend down into a hug so she could tell him something.

“I love you so much.  Take care of him, now.  Don’t let him get away again.”

He hadn’t had the heart to tell her it was a bit.  Just for show.  Because she knows.  He’d told her about it right when they fell out.  She knows that he’s in love with Eric.  

And Tanner knows the wedding was a bad idea.

But hey, they’re doing it, and he can’t bail now.  He just hopes that Eric doesn’t notice how nervous he is underneath the calm demeanor.

“I was not made aware that this was a competition to see who could roast PointCrow and SmallAnt the hardest,” Jacob starts dryly, looking over at them as Tanner meets his eye.  He tilts his head a little and gives him a confident grin.  “So I spent like three hours writing out an actual speech for you guys, trying to make it all nice and sweet, but turns out, I could have just spitballed everything!”  He jokes, crumbling up the sheet of paper he’d brought and tossing it over his shoulder, and Tanner huffs out a laugh, shaking his head.

He appreciates the effort.

“Tanner, when you picked me to be in your wedding party, I was thrilled.  I never thought any of my streamer friends would even get close enough to someone to even think about marriage.  No offense, Linkus, but up until you actually got engaged, you were also on that list.”

Tanner looks over at the Swede and smiles when he notices that he’s laughing, even while offended.

“But I was surprised when you told me who the lucky bride– um, groom, was,” Jacob continues, looking beyond Tanner to Eric.  “I’m glad you were able to put your differences aside and put together such an event on short notice – probably thanks to Abby and SmallAntMom, the mothers of the newlyweds.”

Tanner chuckles, looking at Eric with a grin and a shrug.  He knows Eric’s family is there, in the back of the crowd, but only his mom had ever been on camera with him, and the rest didn’t want to be, so Abby had once again taken the role of Eric’s mother in the public eye.

“But I can’t help but notice that Eric seems to be missing part of his outfit, since he seems like he’s trying to cosplay as Wedding Crasher Mario,” Jacob insists, and Tanner’s eyebrows raise as Jacob walks off-stage, only to return with a white top hat with a white ribbon and a Mario-symbol button attached to it.  It even has paper cutouts of Cappy’s eyes attached to the front.  Jacob walks up to Eric, who, bewildered (and adorable) lifts his hands to take the hat from him, only to have the hat promptly placed on his head and adjusted by Jacob, to laughter and cheer from the audience.

Tanner hadn’t made the connection to Wedding Mario when they’d picked the white tuxedo out for Eric.  Not even when he chose to play Honeylune Ridge as his entrance song.  But now, seeing Eric with the Mario top hat, the red bowtie over the white vest, it clicks.  And Tanner laughs, looking down into the eyes of his to-be-groom.  And he gets a smile in return as Eric tips the hat back just enough to see him fully.

“And with that, Eric has finally accomplished his goal of being taller than Tanner,” Jacob jokes, grinning.  “I was supposed to give it to you before we started, but I forgot it in the car,” he excuses teasingly.  “This makes more sense, I think, anyway."

“Thank you, Jacob, but you weren’t even my groomsman?”  Eric asks with a laugh.

“Well, Dan forgot it first, and then QT forgot it, and then Doug forgot it, and then I was the last one to get out of the car, so I think it was my fault,” Jacob muses, chortling.   “Either way, Eric, Tanner, you guys better make the best damn streamer couple out there.  As the kids these days say: get that bag.  I think.  I don’t know what they say.  Uh, anyway, congratulations on tying the knot, boys, we better see more content from the both of you ASAP.  The public demands it.  Probably.  I don’t know what chat is saying right now, but they’re probably looking for me to get off the stage to get a move on,” he jokes.  “Congratulations.  You deserve happiness.”  And with that, he takes his leave and walks back to his seat.

Tanner realizes, then, that all of them so far have not so much as entertained the roast of “faking a wedding for internet points”.  None of them have even joked about Eric and Tanner getting married as a bit, or just for the content.  Which probably doesn’t help his mother’s belief that this is, in fact, a real wedding.  And he can’t tell if they’re avoiding the subject because it’s funnier to keep the bit alive, or if they’re also thinking that this is real.

Then again, he did change his legal name to Tanner Minecraft, so a wedding isn’t really out of the realm of possibility.  There’s not a distance he won’t go if he thinks it’ll make good content.

“Thank you, Jacob, for that, somewhat impromptu, gift and speech,” CJ says, shaking Tanner out of his head.  “The last speaker we have for you today from the wedding party ended up being split from her boyfriend Ludwig in the rows, because Tanner and Eric don’t have enough friends to go around,” he quips.  “Everybody, give a warm welcome to QTCinderella!”

“Thank you, thank you, thank you,” QT nods as she takes her place by the stand, grabbing the microphone and turning to face Eric and Tanner.  “You know, PointCrow, when I stood here last time and called you a virgin, I didn’t think you’d go out of your way to prove me wrong this fast,” she teases.  “I always thought you needed a rebound from your break-up with SmallAnt, but I hadn’t expected the rebound to be SmallAnt.”

Tanner hears Eric’s laugh ring out beside him, the white top hat tipping back dangerously far before he catches himself and it, and Tanner cracks a smile as he turns his head to look at him.  

“I saw someone on X, formerly Twitter, call your falling out a ‘divorce’, which I think is pretty funny, because it was so obviously a high school breakup – public, making all your mutual friends pick sides, and getting back together again making every emotional turmoil ultimately pointless,” she grins, and Tanner’s face heats up as Eric coughs out a laugh.  “Eric, there’s not much I can say about you that I didn’t say a few months ago at your funeral, except that you took a break from content creation.  Your first since you started actually trying for it.  And can I say?  It’s been the best two months since we became friends, since you stopped messaging me about collabs.”

“SmallAnt, Tanner, why the fuck did you change your last name to Minecraft?  Who let you do that?” QT blurts, and Tanner just shrugs his shoulders with an awkward smile.  

“The Canadian government did,” he replies simply, and while the original roast had gotten a guffaw or two, Tanner’s response was apparently just what they needed to break, because the audience roars, and in the corner of his eye, he sees the white top hat disappear as Eric laughs.  And that was the most important thing, wasn’t it?  Making Eric laugh.  And if he can banter with QT, who he really hasn’t interacted with apart from in groups like this, then surely he can do this.

“So the Canadian government let you change your name to Minecraft, but you’re still coming here to get married?  What, for the green card?”

“I would have taken Eric to Canada, but it was easier to gather people here,” Tanner answers easily, grinning.  

“Guess that’s true,” QT shrugs, “not to mention that half the people in Eric’s friend group wouldn’t be allowed out of the country.”

Tanner turns his face away from QT to snort as he tries to school his features, but as he does, he meets Eric’s gaze, and his face breaks into a smile anyway.

“Tanner, you and your mom stream together, and she even walked you down the aisle today.  How does it feel to be outdone by your own mother?  She got married earlier, settled down earlier, and she’s funnier than you.”

Tanner looks down at the guests and makes out his mother’s face in the crowd, and she laughs and gives him a thumbs up.  He smiles at her and shakes his head in disgruntled amusement.

“Speaking of being outdone by others, I cannot tell which one of you looks more like Scott the Woz.  And he manages to outdo both of you, when he uploads once a month and you two both stream for more than a regular work week every week.   I guess they really mean it when they say quality over quantity.”

“Ooof,” CJ says behind them, and Tanner closes his eyes as his lips quirk, tilting his head amusedly.

“Hey, don’t you think you’re any better, Cee-Jay-Ya,” QT answers immediately.  “You’re like if Scott the Woz lost his glasses and insisted to keep playing video games he can’t see.”

Turning around, Tanner watches CJ’s jaw drop in real time, his eyes wide as his neck twitches slightly, a subtle sign of him trying not to just burst out in disbelieving laughter.  Instead, he catches himself with a cough, turning away from the audience to gather himself.  And Tanner gives him peace, shifting closer to Eric to give CJ some shade from the cameras that feel like they’re plastered everywhere.

The production team really outdid themselves.  Really, everyone did.

“Hi, chat, by the way, I hope you’re having fun!”  QT begins addressing the camera aimed at the stand.  “Well, I don’t really care what you think, you weirdos.  I thought you were weird enough, tuning in live to a funeral, but a wedding, too?  Don’t you know weddings are supposed to be private events?”  She pauses, as if thinking about it for a moment, and it wasn’t already a planned-out speech.

“But then again, if PointCrow and SmallAnt were private people, they probably would never have gotten this far.  So really, it’s their own undoing.  And they probably wouldn’t be known as a 6 foot ant or a 4 foot crow.  I, for one, cannot tell which is worse.”

“Eric, Tanner, I think we’ve all shit on you enough,” she sighs, smiling at them.  “I’m glad you guys have made up, because now I don’t have to pretend to be friends with Eric just so he’s not lonely when Abby’s mad at him for not doing the dishes.”

Tanner’s jaw clenches and he bites his tongue to avoid snarking back at QT.  She’s just doing her job of roasting them, it’s what she was supposed to do.  But it just doesn’t sit right with him.  And he doesn’t really know why.  It’s just roasts, they’re meant to be on the edge of cruel.  Or stepping over said edge.  Even though they told them that it wasn’t off-limits, it was still making his stomach churn.

Eric’s laughing, though, so Tanner can’t really be too mad.

“There’s not a lot I can say about the two of you that hasn’t already been said, except maybe that it makes sense, Eric, how you fumbled every queen you ever tried your hand at.  Turns out you were the queen all along, and we love that for you,” QT starts her final piece.  Tanner can hear it in the way she says it.  “I'm happy that I got to be here, in front of PointCrow and SmallAnt, their friends, family, and most importantly: chat.  None of us can read chat today, but that doesn't really matter, none of us care what you have to say anyway.  Except Doug, when he asks you to write his jokes for him.”

“Eric, Tanner, congratulations on getting married, meaning the next time you have a public falling out, X, formerly Twitter, would be right in calling it a divorce.”  QT steps away from the stand and goes over to them, and Tanner isn’t sure if she’s going in for a hug or a pat on the shoulder.  Luckily for him, it’s the latter.  He’s not great with hugs, he never knows where to put his hands.

“Thank you, thank you, everyone, for your wonderful roasts and speeches, but I think it’s time we get a move on,” CJ breaks through the crowd’s laughter as QT finds her seat.  “Now, onto the most important part of today:  the vows.  There are no vows more meaningful and powerful than the ones shared here today. Your wedding vows are a declaration of your care for each other, the foundation of your relationship as a married couple, and the life you want to build together.”

Tanner wets his lips with his tongue and looks down and to his left, to the candles between them and CJ.  His eyes lift to look at CJ’s face as he continues.  

“Please turn to face each other.  And, because Tanner and Eric are notorious for one-upping one another, they’ve also decided to write their own vows,” he continues.  “Tanner, you may start.”

Clearing his throat, Tanner swallows as he reaches into his jacket pocket to find the folded piece of flash paper he’d written part of his speech on.  He takes a step back, eyes glancing over the words that are already burned into his brain.  Things he should have said before.  Things he never quite knew how to put to words.  A quip, here or there.

Nothing he could lie about.

“It has to be bad, if you’re walking away from me before you even start,” Eric jokes, and Tanner huffs, shrugging a shoulder.

“Guess it is kind of in bad taste, hold on, just–” and Tanner cuts himself off as he trips himself on his shoes, his hands spreading to try to catch himself, and time feels like it slows down as a corner of the paper is caught on a flame on one of the candles, and the paper with his carefully thought out vows disappear into a flash of fire.  Tanner manages to catch himself as Eric reaches out and grabs his arms, the bouquet he’s been so carefully holding dropping to the floor in an attempt to avoid Tanner sinking to the floor.  He’s so busy trying not to faceplant or drag Eric down with him that he misses the audience’s reaction.

The room is completely silent as Tanner and Eric return to a standing position, Eric making sure Tanner won’t fall over again before bending down to pick up the bouquet.  Tanner smiles apologetically out at the crowd.

“Well, sometimes, even your best rehearsed strats fail,” he comments with a chuckle, clearing his throat, “but that’s why it’s always important to practice your back-up strats too, so you’re not lost if you end up failing your first strat.”  And he produces the real copy of his vows out from his pant pocket, holding it up triumphantly to laughs from the crowd and a choked sound from Eric.  

“You see, that was what I thought would be the funniest part of this entire thing.  To crack the tension, the awkwardness, because I’m not good at this.  Maybe that’s just me, though.”  He unfolds his vows and smoothes out the slip of paper before he looks up at Eric, standing there, still slack-jawed.  “Eric.  Eric…  I think… the first thing I wanted to say, is I’m sorry.”  He pauses, watching him collect himself.  

“We’ve both apologized, but I’ve never felt like I can say it enough.  You deserve a better friend than me, but I will spend the rest of our days making it up to you,” and he smiles softly, looking down at his notes.  “I suppose… I’m just grateful, that you’ve been willing to give me another chance.  To let me embark on this journey by your side.  On this day, I promise to be not only your husband, but your best friend and your biggest supporter.  Something I should have been from day one.”

Tanner pauses, taking a deep breath, because his voice started to wobble just a little, and he can’t let himself cry here.  He doesn’t remember the last time he cried in front of anyone that wasn’t his mom, and he doesn’t want it to be now.  So he swallows, steels himself, and he looks up from his handwritten vows to see a stunned Eric standing in front of him.  And Tanner can’t help the small chuckle.

“You know, Eric, you’re truly the one person that taught me that communication, respect and trust makes us far stronger as a pair than we could ever be on our own,” he says, a stupid smile on his face.  “So here I stand, in front of you and all of these people, and I choose you, to spend the rest of my life with.  So… Thank you.”

“In the laughter and in the silence, you’re not getting rid of me this time,” Tanner jokes, blinking back the wetness in his eyes.  “And just as I need you to catch me when I stumble, I will be there to catch you if you fall.  So let’s shoot for the stars, together, this time, PointCrow.  And, unlike some other streamers,” he coughs, “Dream”, another cough, “I promise to never cheat, neither on you nor in any content we do,” he adds, turning to stare right into the camera with a blank expression for as long as he can muster as the audience laughs.

Eric laughs, too.  And Tanner breaks his staring contest with the camera to look down at him, reaching out to shift the top hat back so he can see his face more clearly.

“I almost can’t believe that I get to stand here, in front of you, instead of just seeing you on the other side of a screen.”  He smiles as he sees Eric’s cheeks flush, and Tanner doesn’t think he could have said this to him, if they were alone.  In a way, the cameras, the lights, the audience, makes it easier.  

“I, Tanner Minecraft, take you, Eric Morino, to be my wedded husband. I promise to stay by your side through good and bad streams, for faster or slower speedruns, in challenges and in collaborations. I vow to stay true to you for the rest of my days.”

—

Seeing Tanner stumble and his vows disappear in a flash of light had honestly terrified Eric.  Everything (apart from the Mario top hat, apparently) had gone as well as it could up until that point, but when Tanner stumbled into his own feet because of what he said?  Eric’s heart skipped a beat and he hadn’t been thinking as he lunged forward to catch him.  And he’d heard the audience gasp as the stage lit up for just a second, and it’s like they’re all holding their breaths as they wait for the reaction.

Eric’s own heart was thumping in his ears as Tanner straightened himself back up, and the moment he pulled his ‘back-up strat’ out of his back pocket, Eric had let out a relieved, choked laugh.  It was a bit, Tanner had surprised them all with his own bit.  One he hadn’t even touched on during the rehearsal.  He’d almost set himself on fire, live on stage, in front of everyone.

But now it makes sense that he’d insisted on the candles up there.  Eric hadn’t even questioned it, at the time, thinking that he just wanted to make it more lively or real.  

He looks down at his flowers, and they’re already almost wilting in the sweltering heat of the lights.  Or perhaps that’s just Eric’s imagination.  Because his heart is beating out of his chest as he listens to Tanner’s vows.

And Eric’s imagination must truly be running wild, because Tanner’s words feel like so much more than a roast, a toast, or a declaration of friendship.  It’s a declaration of love, in Eric’s ears.  Perhaps he just wants it to be, intentions twisted by his own feelings.  It wouldn’t be the first time that has happened between them.

The Dream joke makes him laugh, and he looks up at Tanner when he reaches out and adjusts the top hat, and Eric can tell that he’s blinking more than usual.  Blinking back – really?  tears?  Tanner is almost crying? – as he smiles and speaks his vows, Eric’s heart is in his throat as he, if only for a moment, forgets about their audience, about the stream, about the cameras, and he wants to kiss him.  Wants to feel that quivering lower lip against his own, just to ask if he means it.

But the applause and the wolf whistles bring Eric out of Tanner’s mesmerizing gaze, and he looks down into the bouquet as his ears heat up.

“Whoo,” CJ whistles, “now that’s one way to make an entrance,” he comments, to a wave of chuckles from the audience.  “Eric PointCrow, it’s your turn.  Make your vows to Tanner, please.”

Eric rolls his shoulders and lays the bouquet on CJ’s table, making sure it isn’t anywhere near the candles that had swallowed Tanner’s decoy notes.

“Don’t expect me to top that,” Eric jokes as he pulls out his own piece of paper, his hands trembling.

“Don’t worry, Eric, none of us do,” Abby banters from the crowd, and Eric gapes at her before flipping her the middle finger.  At least he isn’t as nervous anymore, as he looks down at his vows and retracts his outstretched arm.

“Tanner, SmallAnt, I’ve always looked up to you for your creativity, your skill, and your determination.  And, now that we’re face to face, finally, I suppose I am also looking up at you literally, you tall freak,” he begins fondly, chortling at his own joke.  “I was so proud to be your friend, and I still am.  Bu– but, today, I’m even more proud to be able to stand here and take your hand in marriage.”  Eric swallows down the heartbeat in his throat, or perhaps it’s bile.  Public speaking had never been his forte, and right now, he feels like he’s laying his heart bare.

Maybe he is.

“We both had a lot of growing to do, both together and apart, and it’s been a pleasure watching your content develop and evolve so differently from my own, even though we started out in the same place.  You’ve got incredible skill, and you can do anything you set your mind to.  Which means I am amazed you even considered doing this.   You could have anyone you wanted, and yet, I’m the one standing in front of you today.”

Eric bites his tongue to physically stop himself from saying the four words that threaten to spill from his lips.  It doesn’t feel real.   But he can’t say that, even when it’s written on the piece of paper he’s clutching like a lifeline.  He’d written it in a blur of emotion and uncertainty, but standing here, in front of Tanner and everyone else, he can’t.

Because, in the end, it isn’t.  

It’s not real, and he can’t let himself entertain that it is.  It may break his heart, but it could save their friendship.  And Eric isn’t going to let Tanner slip from his grasp, now that they’ve gotten to know one another again.

“I, Eric Morino, take you, Tanner Minecraft, to be your wedded husband,” Eric starts, foregoing the rest of his prepared vows to instead look up at him and speak Tanner’s words back to him as best he can repeat them.  “I vow to– to stay by your side through go– good and bad streams, for faster or slower, hah, speedruns, in– in challenges and in collaborations. I promise to stay true to you, as who I am, for the rest of my days.”  His stutter frustrates him, but he can’t stop it, and it’s only when he’s done that he recognizes that he’s crying.  Shit, shit, shit, no, not in front of everyone–

“Now, I would like the ringbearer, Fir, to come join us on stage,” CJ interrupts Eric’s inner panic, and he swallows, taking deep breath after deep breath to settle himself as he watches Fir walk up to them and stand by CJ’s side.  He tries to futilely blink away the tears that are already falling, and he quickly reaches up to wipe his face before CJ speaks again.

“Do you, Tanner ‘SmallAnt’ Minecraft, take the man in front of you to be your wedded husband?”  CJ asks as Tanner is handed one of the rings.

“I do,” Tanner answers, meeting Eric’s gaze.

“And do you, Eric ‘PointCrow’ Morino, take the man in front of you to be your wedded husband?”

Eric takes the ring from Fir and nods.  “I do.”

“Now, you’ve received the rings.  Unfortunately, Sonic didn’t join us today, but these are probably more valuable than his, anyway,” CJ muses teasingly, and the tension rising in Eric’s skull dissipated somewhat as he laughs.  “But these rings do symbolize the commitment you are making to each other, and the never ending circle of Content Creation.  May these rings always remind you of the commitment you are making here today.”

“Tanner, Eric, please repeat after me,” CJ begins.  

“I, Tanner, give you, Eric, this symbol as a commitment to you.”   And Tanner takes Eric’s left hand, sliding the ring onto his ring finger easily, and the skin-warmed metal still sends a chill down his spine.  Tanner’s hands linger as they hold on to his for what feels like an eternity, before he slowly lets go and lowers both hands as Eric curls both of his against his chest.

“I, Eric, give you, Tanner, this symbol as a commitment to you.”   The words fall from his lips easily, without hesitation, and Eric lifts Tanner’s left hand to slip the ring onto the correct finger, but his hands haven’t gotten the memo that he’s not supposed to be nervous, so they tremble almost enough to make him try to place the ring on Tanner’s middle finger instead.  But with another deep breath, the ring practically clicks into place, and Tanner’s right hand comes up to steady his hands.

“By the power vested in me, I pronounce you husbands Mister and Mister Minecraft. You may now kiss, or hug, or… which… ever…”  CJ trails off, because as soon as ‘kiss’ was uttered from his lips, Tanner was leaning in, one hand slipping to cup Eric’s cheek.

“May I?”  Eric prays the words aren’t picked up by their mics as he pushes forward, pressing their lips together as his arms come to wrap around Tanner’s neck.  He feels the top hat slip off his head, but he can’t care when Tanner’s arms wrap around his back and hold him close.

They break apart when the music starts playing, and Eric smiles apologetically as he notices Tanner recognizing the song.  Honeylune Ridge: Escape.   Again.  Except this time with a live singer, a friend of a friend of a friend that jumped on the opportunity to cover the song.  And Tanner laughs and leans in, pressing a dry kiss to his cheek.  “Good choice,” Tanner mumbles against his ear.

Eric reaches behind himself and turns off his mic as Tanner swoops down to pick up Eric’s hat, picking off the weird Cappy eye cutout before placing it back on his head.  Eric laughs, bending his neck and tucking his chin against his chest out of embarrassment, and Tanner hands him the bouquet.

“Shall we?”  Eric is asked, and taking Tanner’s hand in his own, he laces their fingers as they start walking off the stage.

Smash through the blocks that bar your way

No more time for fear, just let it all fall away

“Nobody believed in me and you, just look at the way they stare,” Tanner whispers against his ear, and Eric laughs as his cheeks run hot.  

“Kick up the wall and take the plunge,” Eric responds as they pass row by row of cheering, gobsmacked, or wolf-whistling audience members, and they just grin and walk together, hands held tightly between them.

“We really should have coordinated that better,” Eric mutters, once they’re out of the venue.

“Do you really think we would have gotten this far if we had?”  

Eric huffs and pulls him into the hallway, thankfully not covered by the cameras.  “Tanner, I don’t– I– we–”

“My mom thinks it’s a real wedding,” Tanner tells him, interrupting his stumbling so infuriatingly level-headed.

“Wha– why?”  Eric asks, breath coming in short pants as he looks up at him with wide eyes.

“She knows what you mean to me.”

“Tanner?”

“You kissed me back.”

“I did, a– and–”

“Did it mean anything?”

“Everything.”

“Everything?”

“It– it was supposed to just be for– for the bit, for the– the stream, to prove to everyone that we were friends– but that kiss…  Smant, why?”

“Tanner.”

“What?”

“Call me Tanner, Eric, please,” Tanner pleads.  “God, we’ve been so stupid, haven’t we?”

“We wasted so– so much time,” Eric whimpers.  

“We don’t have to waste any more,” Tanner tells him, and Eric nods with a shaky breath.

“Kiss me again,” Eric demands, his hands moving up to cup Tanner’s chin and pull him in.

—

CJ is the only one that sees Eric pull Tanner into the side hallway, but as the stream focuses away from the crowd and the credits roll to the live performance of Dawn of the Third Day, one of Nate’s originals, he can’t bring himself to disturb them.  Not when everyone is gathered up by the stage, laughing and talking to each other.

“I didn’t expect them to actually, y’know, touch lips,” Ludwig comments to CJ as they work on moving the chairs out of the way to make room for the catering.

CJ shrugs as he stacks the chairs.  “I dunno, it didn’t seem impossible.”

“Where’d they even go?”

“Fresh air, probably.  The camera’s focused on Nate, so we didn’t have to do the whole procession thing back out.  How far were you going to drag out the Bee Movie?”  

Ludwig grimaces.  “Until someone stopped me,” he reveals with a chuckle.  

“So you really had the entire script on that scroll?”  CJ laughs.

“Most of it,” he admits.

“God, now I’m glad I stopped you when I did.”

They help set up the tables for the catering, and CJ slips away to head to the stage to blow out the candles.  And he thinks back to Tanner burning his vows.  You could have heard a pin drop in the silence that followed, and he hopes the moment was captured well on the cameras.

“You guys all went so hard on them,” he hears Dan laugh.  

“You said that Smant doesn’t wear pants on stream,” QT reminds him with a chuckle of her own as CJ approaches the group.

“Well, yeah, but I’m Eric’s best man, I’m supposed to make fun of them!”

“I was under the impression that they were doing, like, a friend marriage just to squash the rumors,” QT muses.

“Are you joking?”  Dan asks, flabbergasted.  “The way Eric was after he cut SmallAnt off?  There was way more than just friendly feelings there.”

“I dunno, Dan,” CJ interjects, hands in his pockets, “I know Tanner’s normally a pretty private person, but I never got any vibes from him about Eric,” he lies.  He lies right to their faces, because he’d been on the receiving end of a string of drunk messages from Tanner not long after the friendship broke about how he’d ruined everything with Eric.  The morning after, the messages had been deleted, but CJ doesn’t forget.  “I’m not even sure he swings that way.”

“CJ!”  Dan yelps.  “Wha– how can you say that?  We all saw them, didn’t we?  You were standing right in front of them, there’s no way you didn’t see that.”

CJ laughs.  “SmallAnt commits to everything.”

“I dunno, CJ,” Fir shrugs.  “That seemed pretty real to me.  Eric almost dropped Smant’s ring,” he notes amusedly.

“For a streamer, Eric’s never been good at public speaking.  The guy was so nervous while we were preparing everything, I’m not surprised his hands were shaking,” Abby explains.  “I don’t know, I don’t think we should speculate.  It seemed to me like there were a lot of feelings between them.  Whatever kind of feelings they may be.”

“Abby’s right,” CJ sighs.  “They’ll say what they need to when they’re ready.”

—

“That went way better than I thought it would.”

“What if we actually got married?”  Eric asks, out of breath as he leans on the wall, his hat under his arm as he pulls the microphone off of himself, letting it carefully drop to the floor behind his feet.

“Wasn’t that what we just did?”  Tanner counters teasingly, leaning on the wall beside him with his head turned towards Eric as he detaches himself from his own microphone.

“I– I mean legally.  It wouldn’t take long, it’s just a trip down to the courthouse, shouldn’t take more than an hour.”

Tanner laughs.  “Seems a bit rash, don’t you think?”  He asks, reaching out to rest his hand on Eric’s arm.

“We wasted so much time.”  It’s a repetition from earlier, but Eric doesn’t mean it any less.

“Twitter would eat it up,” Tanner muses with a grin.

“X,” Eric corrects, chuckling.  “But what about you?”

“I changed my name to Minecraft for an award I didn’t get,” Tanner reminds him.  “Think we can sneak out of here without anyone noticing?”

“Nobody’s come looking for us,” Eric shrugs, feeling like a teenager sneaking out of the house again.  And there’s a giddy excitement bouncing in his bones that he can’t seem to shake.

“Then let’s go.”  Tanner grabs Eric’s hand and pulls him out of the location they’d rented, and they share a laugh all the way to the car.

—

“Has anyone seen the boys?  The food is going to get cold if they don’t come back soon,”  Tanner’s mom muses worriedly, not having seen her son since he walked out of the room almost two hours ago.

“I’ll go outside, see if I can find them,” CJ offers, and Doug goes with him.  The first place CJ checks is the hallway he’d seen Eric drag Tanner into, and he notices two discarded microphones and the red carnation from Tanner’s breast pocket on the floor.  He crouches down to pick up the flower, showing it to Doug.  “They must’ve been here.”  With his other hand, he grabs the two microphones, gathering the wires by wrapping them around his fingers.   He’ll detangle them later.

“Yeah, well, where’d they go after, then?” Doug asks pointedly, right as the front doors burst open, Eric and Tanner stumbling in, giggling together not unlike girls CJ knew in high school.  CJ straightens up and looks at them.

“Where the hell have you been?”   CJ asks, “Tanner, your mom is this close to calling the cops to report you missing.”

“We’re fine, CJ,” Eric says, clearing his throat.  “Sorry we just disappeared, we had… something to do.”

“Something?”  Doug echoes, raising his eyebrows.

“We got married,” Tanner tells him with a grin, his arm slung around Eric’s shoulders.

“Are you two drunk?”  CJ questions, because his friends seem delirious and out of it, and he doesn’t know what to think.

“God, I wish I was,” Eric sighs dramatically.

“No, seriously, are you two okay?”  CJ presses.

“I just told you, CJ, we went and got married,” Tanner insists.  And he pulls his right arm from around Eric’s shoulders to pull a sheet of paper from his jacket.  “We’ve got copies in the car,” he adds as he passes it to Doug.  Taking it, he unfolds it as CJ leans over to look at it over his shoulder.

“A marriage license…?”  Doug asks.  “You guys actually, legally, got hitched?”

“Yep, sure did!”  Eric hums.  “Eric Morino Minecraft, pleased to meet ya,” he teases, holding out his hand to shake.

Neither CJ nor Doug move to shake his hand.  CJ because his hands are wrapped in wire, and Doug because he’s Doug.

“It took us an extra half-hour just to convince the clerk that Minecraft is my last name,” Tanner apologizes without meaning it.

“Go back in and tell your mom you’re fine!”  CJ orders, walking around them and starting to push Tanner towards the inner entrance.  “You too, Eric.”  He shoves them in front of himself before turning to look at Doug, shaking his head.

“They’re idiots,” Doug agrees.

—

“There you are, Tanner!”  

Tanner hadn’t thought about it, but when CJ told him that his mom had been worried about him, he began to feel bad about not telling anyone they were leaving.

“Heyyyy, mom,” Tanner says awkwardly, giving her a stilted, apologetic grin.

“Where have you been?”  She asks, walking up to him and reaching up to grab his cheeks.

“We went to the courthouse, mom.  To sign the papers.”

“Well, surely you could have let your mother know that,” she chides playfully, patting his cheek.  “Instead of just disappearing.”

“Yeah, you two were the stars of the show!”  Dan adds.  “You can’t just up and leave on us.  We’ve been waiting for you guys to get back before we started to eat.”

Tanner’s stomach grumbles, and he grimaces.  “Well, we’re here now.”

“Time for food!”  Eric announces, popping up beside his new husband.  “Everybody, dig in!”

They’re shuffled to the front of the line, and with an apologetic look at the catering staff, they both help themselves to solid heaping servings before retreating to sit on the edge of the stage.

Not long after, both wedding parties come up to them to settle around them.  Doug and CJ had each brought a stack of chairs and dispersed them so they were sitting in a ring, and Tanner raises his eyebrows.

“Seems like something’s missing,” he comments, nodding to the empty space in the middle.

“A campfire,” Eric jokes, and Tanner snorts.

“You two just snuck off,” Dan accuses playfully.

“Where did you go?”  Ludwig asks, leering at them.  “You do look a little disheveled,” he comments.

“I blame LA traffic,” Tanner huffs.

“May I?”  Doug asks, and Tanner glances at Eric, who gives him a shrug, before he nods at Doug.

“Go ahead.”

Doug takes out the wedding license he’d been given earlier and passes it around the circle of friends, and each person who gets it either gapes, gasps, chokes on their food, or just stares at it in disbelief before passing it on.  Until it’s back with Doug and he hands it to Tanner, who sets down his plate to take it and tuck it back in his pocket.

“That’s a really good fake,” Ludwig comments.

“It’s not fake,” Dan argues.  “It was stamped and certified and everything!”

“Is it fake?”  Ludwig asks Tanner, who shakes his head.  

“All real.  Spent an hour with a clerk, most of said time going to showing her all my available ID to prove my surname,” Tanner says dryly, picking back up his food and continuing to eat.

“She really wasn’t keen on letting me change my name either,” Eric comments plainly, waving his fork dismissively.

“Oh my god, you took Tanner’s last name,” Linkus mutters.  “I didn’t even see that!”

“CJ did introduce us as ‘Mister and Mister Minecraft’,” Eric muses.  “I figured we shouldn’t make a liar out of him,” he jokes.

“So, Smant, is Eric a good kisser?”  Fir asks Tanner, nudging him with his elbow from his place next to him.

“Why do you want to know, Fir?  Are you jealous or something?”  CJ teases.

“What?!  No,” Fir denies.

“He’s pretty good at it,” Tanner nods appreciatively before taking another bite of his food.

“So…  How long have you guys been together?”  Jacob asks, and Tanner almost chokes on his food.  Swallowing, Tanner hits himself in the chest to clear out the cough threatening to take over him, with only a medium amount of success.

“I’d say… around two and a half, close to three–” Eric begins.

“Weeks?  Months?”

“Hours,” Tanner rasps, clearing his throat as he reaches for his water bottle.

“HOURS?”  the group echoes in disbelief, several of them pulling out their phones to check the time.

“You’re telling us that you two got married on stream, in front of over ten thousand people, and only after realized you were into each other?”  Ludwig asks.

“Ten thousand?”  Eric repeats, and Tanner’s eyes widen as he swallows his gulp of water, trying not to cough again.

“Stream peaked at twelve thousand around the vows, but steady viewership was between nine and ten thousand,” QT confirms.

“Now, hold on,” Dan interrupts.  “So this wasn’t a real wedding?”

“Well… it wasn’t, but then it kind of was?” Eric explains.  

“Okay, I have to know.  How long have you been pining?”

“Since the first Breath of the Wild Bingo,” Tanner replies, almost immediately.

“Oh, my god,” Eric breathes out.  “That was our first stream together!”

“You made an impression,” Tanner shrugs, giving him a grin.  But he thinks back to when he realized he’d had a crush on Eric, and his eyes lose the brightness, but he keeps up the pretense of the smile.  “What about you?”

“Man…” Eric mumbles, looking down at his lap.  “I don’t even know anymore.  I don’t think there was, like, this one moment, when things changed.  Just… it took me a long time to realize.”

“Yeah,” Tanner breathes out, running a hand through his hair.  “Too long,” he muses.

“Whose idea was the Wedding Mario hat?”  Eric asks, changing the subject as he balances said top hat on one knee.

“It was a team effort,” Tanner admits, chuckling.  

“Tanner told me one of you would be wearing a white tux,” Dan explains, “he didn’t say which, but we figured it out,” he teases.

“Then it was just a matter of making sure the wedding colors lined up so you’d have a red bowtie, and the stage was set,” Abby adds with a wide grin.

“Tanner, can I just say: what the fuck?”  CJ huffs.  “I swear I thought the entire stage was going to be set on fire.”

“Yeah, what was that?” Fir presses.  “I was close to running off to get the fire extinguisher.”

“I tested it beforehand,” Tanner dismisses.  “It was just flash paper, it wasn’t going to light anything else on fire.”

“How on earth did you know I was going to nag you about stepping back?”  Eric asks.

“It was going to be either you or CJ,” Tanner shrugs.  “One step back to line myself up, and then I could trip myself to lose the paper.”

“What if I’d let you tumble to the floor?”  

“I’d have caught myself.  I tested the fall more than once.”

“You’re an idiot.”

Tanner laughs.  “I needed something to make myself loosen up,” he adds.  

“So you almost caused a fire hazard,” Linkus says plainly.

“No, I strategized and gave myself an opportunity to embarrass myself in a controlled environment so I wouldn’t screw up what I wanted to say.”

“Would you have done it if I’d said my vows first?”  Eric tucks his leg under him as he turns to face him.

“I mean, I had no other plan.”

“What about your ‘backup strats’?”  Eric jokes, pointing his fork Tanner’s way.

“One can only be so prepared,” Tanner teases back easily, snatching Eric’s fork out of his hand to steal food from Eric’s plate.  As he takes the piece of pasta between his teeth, he watches Eric’s disbelieving dropped jaw.  Swallowing it down, Tanner reaches out with his other hand, gently cupping Eric’s cheek to bring him into a slow, careful kiss.

Pulling back, Eric’s cheeks are hot and his slack-jawed expression has shifted to an embarrassed smile.

“You guys are going to be so annoying for the rest of Tanner’s stay, aren’t you?”  Doug teases.

“Would you have us any other way?”  

—

It’s hours later, and Abby, Tanner, Eric and Tanner’s mom have made it back to their house.  SmallAntMom had almost immediately excused herself to “rewatch the wedding”, and Abby had left to unwind on her own after the day, leaving the newlyweds to their own devices.

They end up in Eric’s bedroom, shedding their jackets and vests, and the top hat finds itself a place on an empty nail on his wall.  It fits there, but in a flash, Eric wishes his walls weren’t white, so he’d see it better.

“Wanna know what my mom told me?” Tanner asks in the dim light coming from the TV screen.  

“Sure, I guess,” Eric shrugs, unbuttoning the stiff shirt and feeling like a weight is off his shoulders as it slips off his torso.  As if he isn’t nerve-wrackingly curious about what his mother had told him as they walked down the aisle.

“Don’t let him get away again,” Tanner huffs.

“Again?”  Eric asks, even though he has a pretty good idea of what she meant.

“I was drunk when I told her.”  Tanner plays with his fingers, looking down.  “It was just a week after we’d cut contact.  I’d only realized after, that I loved you.  Love, you.  But she came in to find me crying and drunk and I just… laid my heart bare to her.”

“You told everyone you’d been pining since the bingo stream,” Eric says quietly, sitting down on the bed next to him.

“Hindsight,” Tanner sighs.  “I think… part of that was why I went so hard on the rivalry.  I tried to ignore whatever I thought I might feel, if we just kept butting heads, kept challenging each other.  And it was fun, until it wasn’t.  And I should have seen it, I should have stopped them–”

“Tanner, stop,” Eric interrupts, covering Tanner’s hands with his own when he sees the picking turn harsher, rougher, and he knows he’s going to hurt himself if he keeps that up.  “We’ve talked it out, yeah?  You don’t have to keep apologizing for it.”

“It was my fault.”

“No, it was chat’s fault,” Eric corrects, lacing their fingers together so Tanner can’t pick at his nails.  “Right?  You were keeping up your persona and the chat fed into it.  And then I read into it too much.  I thought I did, today too, with the vows.  But– but then you kissed me.”

“It was terrifying,” Tanner admits, clutching Eric’s hand.  “But… somehow, it was easier to say the things I wanted to say to you, in front of all of them.”

“So I wouldn’t freak out on you?”  Eric jokes lightly, squeezing his hand.  “I get it,” he adds quickly before Tanner can deny it.  

“I don’t know if CJ knew,” Tanner sighs.  “That same night I told my mom, I’d sent him a bunch of DMs about you.  I deleted them the next morning, but he never mentioned it.”

“So you think he played cupid?”

“Did you tell anyone?”

“Not– not explicitly, but Dan and Abby definitely had suspicions,” Eric says quietly, wetting his lips with his tongue.  “I don’t think QT or any of the others knew.”

Tanner lets out a heavy breath, the hand not trapped in Eric’s grip reaching up to his face, first running through his hair before taking off his glasses.  “I meant everything I said.”  Lifting his head, Tanner looks at him and Eric wants to kiss him.

And he does.  Because he can, now.  He leans in and presses their lips together briefly before pulling back and looking at him.

“Me too,” Eric replies softly, before tipping his head back tiredly.  He’d been running on anxious fumes and delirium all day, and it was finally draining out of him.  “God, I could sleep for a day.”

“I’ll–” Tanner moves to stand up when Eric’s head shoots back up.  “I’ll head to–”

“Are you leaving?”  Eric asks.

“I– I didn’t want to assume you’d want me to share the bed,” Tanner admits, swallowing as his eyes shift.

“On our wedding night?”  Eric teases, and it breaks Tanner’s tense shoulders.  “If– if you want to, I’d like you to stay,” he adds, just in case.

Tanner smiles and lets out a small huff.  “Yeah, okay then.  Since it’s our ‘wedding night’, and all,” he teases back, and Eric grins as his stomach is filled with butterflies.  “I’ll just go get changed, then.”

Eric nods, and once the door to his bedroom is left ajar, he takes the opportunity to pull out his phone.  The marriage license is on his desk, and after some adjustments, he takes a picture of it.  A few redacts to avoid doxxing them later, and Eric is ready to post it to Twitter with a fairly special caption.

But it’s been a very special day.

“What are you doing?”  Tanner asks curiously when he returns in loose gray sweatpants and a plain dark t-shirt.

“Thanking everyone for tuning in today,” Eric hums and lets Tanner see the posted tweet.

“Thank you to everyone who showed up on our wedding day!  We have one more surprise for you tonight,” Tanner quotes, interrupting himself with a chuckle when he sees the attached image.  “We should have gotten the license before and signed it on stage,” he jokes.  “Don’t you think?”

Eric laughs and sets his phone down on the nightstand before he grabs sweatpants and a clean t-shirt.  “Maybe we should,” he agrees, nodding.  “I’ll be right back.”  Holding up the fresh clothes as an explanation, he slips out of the room.  It’s odd, wanting to change without being watched by your legally wedded husband, but Eric argues with himself that it’s fresh.  They’re not used to it.

He wonders, while brushing his teeth, how they’ll get used to it.  It’s not like Tanner is just going to move in with him, nor is he willing to uproot his life and move to Canada.

“Long distance marriage.  It’s like a bad TLC show,” Eric tells himself, looking in the mirror.  “As if any of them are good,” he mutters under his breath.  But he doesn’t look like a married man.  Apart from the ring on his finger.

It’s skin-warm now, and he stops to really look at it for the first time.  Taking it off, Eric eyes the simple gold band in the bright light above the sink, and he squints to look at the inscription on the inside.

So let’s shoot for the stars

Eric doesn’t recognize it as he reads it, but it feels familiar.  Like he’s heard it somewhere.  But it’s so innocuous, it could’ve been from anywhere.

He hopes it isn’t some other Mario Odyssey reference – the Cappy Eyes will haunt his dreams.

Sliding the ring back onto his finger, Eric is surprised how well it settles against the base of his finger.  How comfortable it is.  He’s never been a guy that wears jewelry – he’s never looked the type – but it isn’t foreign, like he thought it might be.  He could easily get used to wearing it, he thinks, as he pulls the t-shirt over his head and makes his way back to his bedroom.

Somehow, he’s surprised when there’s someone else in there.  But of course there is, Tanner’s there.  He’s sat himself up against the headboard, on top of the sheets, looking at his phone.  The shifting light of the screen lights up his face, and Eric sees the outline of an earbud in the ear facing him.

“What are you watching?”  Eric asks, sitting next to him and feeling the mattress bounce lightly under both of their weights.

“I’m watching back the end of the stream,” Tanner explains, pausing the video and taking out one earbud.  “Wanna see?  We’re just about to kiss.”  He offers him the bud, and Eric takes it, settling with his head against Tanner’s shoulder as he watches the screen.  He blocks out his own words, instead looking at how fast chat is moving and how the production team really outdid themselves with the live editing and camera changes.  They were worth every dime.

“I now pronounce you husbands Mister and Mister Minecraft. You may now kiss, or hug, or… which… ever…”

And Eric watches Tanner lean down towards him, and he holds his breath.  His eyes are on chat, seconds later going wild like he’s never seen it.  Everyone’s cheering them on, celebrating, waving pride flags everywhere, and Eric feels like an idiot for ever trying to pretend it wasn’t a real wedding.  It obviously was.

It was just… their wedding.  If Eric had a choice to redo it, he wouldn’t have done it any differently.

Except maybe the song choices.  Playing the same song at the start and the end was a bit much.

Speaking of– Nate starts singing as the camera zooms out to capture their escape, and that’s when it hits Eric.

“Oh, my god,” he groans.

“What?”  Tanner asks, pausing the stream to look at him.  Eric takes Tanner’s left hand and pulls the ring off his finger.  “Eric, what are you doing?”

“It was Fir that got the rings engraved, wasn’t it?”

“It was me,” Tanner admits.  “Awkward to get through security and be asked about,” he chuckles.

And as he angles the ring correctly, Eric reads Tanner’s inscription.

And make this love really shine

“What if I didn’t feel the same?”  Eric asks, sliding the ring back onto Tanner’s finger gently.

“Why do you think I kept the one with ‘love’ on it?”  Tanner muses.

Eric huffs and shifts so his shoulder is against the headboard and he can look at Tanner more fully.  The other’s eyebrows raise as he meets Eric’s gaze.  “For two streamers that first competed in a zelda game, our wedding was strangely overwhelmingly Mario-themed,” he teases.

“Would you rather I’d have walked in to the guardian alert music?”  Tanner jokes.

Eric pretends to consider it for a moment, before he snorts.  “No, no, not at all.  But c’mon, it’s weird, isn’t it?  Honeylune Ridge three times, the Mario hat… –”

“The second song Nate sung was, like, a Majora’s Mask song, I think?”

Eric chuckles.  “Really?”  He puts the earbud back in, and Tanner wraps his arm around his shoulders to pull him close, skipping through them walking out of the venue and the end of the song.  And they watch as Nate pulls out his guitar and starts playing, sitting on the edge of the stage with the camera’s focus on him.

The lyrics don’t seem to register immediately, but it’s definitely a Zelda song.  “Gives me courage, gives me wisdom, gives me strength” isn’t exactly a subtle line.

“Wow,” Eric breathes out, listening to the rest of the song as the credits scroll on screen and chat settles down.  Some are noticeably recognizing the artist, but most seem to still just waving both of their pride emotes as well as the smolBlushes, the smolFlirts, the pcrowCutes and the pcrowCrys.  It’s making Eric’s heart swell, to see so many members of their chat celebrate them.

“Maybe chat isn’t that bad, after all,” Tanner says, stopping the stream and picking out his earbud.

“Maybe not,” Eric agrees, handing Tanner back the earbud he’d borrowed, and he watches him slide them into the charging case.  “I’m beat.”

“Yeah, me too,” Tanner shifts to pull back the sheets and lay down, and Eric follows suit, his knees knocking against Tanner’s awkwardly.

“Oh!  Sorry,” Eric apologizes as he straightens out his legs.

“It– it’s fine,” Tanner chuckles, “guess that’ll take some getting used to, huh?”

Nodding, Eric shifts closer and kisses him softly.  Tanner’s hand cups his cheek as he returns the kiss gently.  “This’ll take some getting used to, too,” he mumbles against his lips, and Tanner’s leg wraps around the back of Eric’s thighs to pull him closer.

“I think we’ll pick it up easily,” Tanner mutters in response, breaking the kiss to roll onto his back, bringing Eric with him, and he has to catch himself with his arms on either side of Tanner’s head and his knees between Tanner’s legs.

“Tease,” Eric grunts, carefully shifting so he’s straddling Tanner’s hips instead.  Leaning down, he kisses him again.

“You love that about me.”

“I love everything about you,” Eric replies.

“Sap.”

Eric chuckles lightly and moves off of him, pulling the blankets with him on accident.

“Oh, I see how it is.  You’re a blanket stealer,” Tanner teases, reaching out and pulling the blanket back towards himself.

Eric huffs and lays down next to him on his stomach.  “No I’m not,” he mutters defiantly.  But he doesn’t really know if he is.  He hasn’t been called out for it by others he’s spent the night with, at least.

“Sure you aren’t,” Tanner hums, snuggling into the pillow he’d claimed.  “G’night, Eric.”

“Good night, Tanner,” Eric mumbles, eyes already closed.

—

The next morning, their DMs are full of congratulations, their discords are full of cheers and laughs, and the two men decide to take a slow day.  It’s not every day you marry your former rival on stream, after all.