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“God, Ed,” Stede gasped, trying to maintain some decorum as he gave in to the need to rut into the swell of Ed’s belly.
Ed, reclined on the couch, pinned down by his belly, whined. He was about twice the size he had been when they’d met and it drove Stede wild. Stede moaned, his face pressing into the pillow beside them.
“What happened…” Ed panted. “To all your words?”
“Words?” Stede asked breathlessly. “Mm, you want me to tell you you’re a glutton, don’t you? Greedy thing. Look at what you’ve done to yourself. You’ve gotten so fat .”
Ed’s cock poked out from under his belly, leaking as he blinked dazedly. He moaned, and his belly gurgled in protest of its fullness.
“Tummy’s grumbling,” Stede said. “God, Ed, are you still hungry? How much can you eat ?”
“I just can’t stop,” Ed whispered.
Stede’s hands flew to Ed’s gut, pressing in, pressure bordering on painful against Ed’s stuffed middle. They both gasped.
“Fuck, Ed, you’re so big . So good, so good, for me, Ed, I— ah— I’m—”
“ Stede, fuck, please, fuck— ”
---
It was going well. It was like a fairytale, like everything Stede could have ever wished for. And Ed, God, he just kept growing, eating, loving Stede. It seemed to drive them both wild.
But there was something… something Stede didn’t know what to do with. A feeling. A want.
Stede was hungry. Well… it was complicated.
They were going so well. Their dynamic didn’t need to be interrupted by Stede’s desires. He didn’t want to ruin it. But sometimes… sometimes Stede wanted… to be full. Not just full, but ever so full. Glutted. Sometimes… Stede wanted to get bigger too. Just like Ed.
But would it ruin it? Would Ed even want to be fed by someone just as focused on feeding himself as Ed? Surely it just… didn’t fit. Puzzle pieces that wouldn’t go together. What if it was terribly unattractive to Ed?
But Stede’s desires were getting stronger. Too strong to contain. From wistful late-night imaginings, daring to dream of his belly rounded out further before him than ever, to now.
Now, Lucius gone home for the day, Stede driving his own fucking car. Parked in the lot behind McDonald’s, devouring two burgers, ten nuggets, chips and a soft drink before going home to meet Ed there for dinner. Hoping nobody notices. Nobody can know.
He’s already full, breathless as he walks to the elevator, ready to confront Ed at home. Fuller than the thought he’d be. Overfull. The feeling fills him with pleasure and electricity as much as it makes him nervous. Could Ed possibly smell it on him? Notice a crumb, or a spot of sauce he missed with the wet wipes and suddenly piece it all together?
It is, as Stede did secretly expect, not as terrifying when he is actually faced with Ed—standing outside the door to Stede’s apartment, a bunch of flowers in his hand and a bag in the other, wearing a crop top and jeans so tight his upper belly pinched in and spilled over the waist of them.
His chubby cheeks and adorable double chin looked especially soft as his eyes lit up and he smiled.
“Stede! I brought snacks!” He lifted the bag proudly.
“Ed, oh, dear, I ho—” Stede felt his cheeks heating as he had to stop to abruptly muffle a burp. Ed didn’t even blink, and Stede tried to stifle his embarrassment too. “I hope you haven’t been waiting long! I got… held up.”
“Aw, I don’t mind, mate. ‘S warm in here, and your neighbour always buzzes me in.”
Oh yes, Sue. She’d never say it to Ed, bless her, but she had started complaining about that to Stede. Which reminded him of something.
“Well, you’ll never have to do that again! Or stand out here waiting,” Stede said, digging around in his satchel for a moment before producing a simple, second set of keys, with a little charm in the shape of an ice cream dangling from them.
Ed’s eyes widened. “Stede, fuck, that’s lovely. But I’d hate to just… invite myself in when you’re not even home, love. I mean…”
“No, please, I want you to have them. That’s what I got them for,” Stede said, shoving them into Ed’s bag full of… chips and ice cream, by the look of it. Ed did love a snack while he waited for dinner. Stede did too, if he was honest.
As a part of the same movement forward, Stede stepped to the door and unlocked it. “Now put that ice cream away before it melts.”
Ed kissed him on the cheek. After all this time, that still gave Stede butterflies. Ed being so close, so warm, so loving. It was like nothing else.
“Hey, what’s this?” Ed said from the kitchen, the sounds of him rustling around in the freezer filling the apartment, sort of… familiar, comforting.
And then there was a sound, of Ed opening something, and whistling. And Stede remembered.
Shrugging his cardigan off quickly, hanging it up, he stepped into the kitchen in a few long strides.
Ed was grinning, freezer open, a tub of ice cream in his hand. Quite a big one. And it was nearly empty. Stede was the culprit, and he’d forgotten it was even there, to be honest. But the kicker was that Stede and Ed both knew that it hadn’t even been there the last time Ed was over, which wasn’t even three days ago.
Stede couldn’t even look Ed in the eyes, suddenly. He didn’t quite know why.
“Got through this quick, hm?” Ed giggled. “Not seeing any other cute gluttons behind my back, are you?” He was teasing. Joking. Stede nearly considered saying yes just to alleviate the sense of shame.
“It was given to me,” Stede lied. “Wasn’t full to begin with, but I’ve been… working away at it. Trying to free up the freezer space for you.”
That was a complete and utter fabrication.
“Who gave you half-eaten ice cream? ” Ed asked, and it was a perfectly reasonable question, to be honest.
“Ah, um, well, Lucius!” Stede said. “Cut out dairy! And, ah… freezer broke down! Yes, that’s quite… it.”
Ed snorted. “Could’ve just chucked it, if it wasn’t much. Nice of him to try not to waste it, I s’pose.”
“Well, I too have been… doing my… best,” Stede said. He could feel himself still blushing. Fucking hell.
“Real devoted to the noble cause, love,” Ed said, reaching up with his free hand and ruffling Stede’s curls playfully. “Looks it’s your time to prove yourself with that whole freeing up freezer space mission, babe, ‘cause I can’t fit this thing and my stuff in there.”
Stede swallowed. “Surely… wouldn’t you like it? It’s chocolate flavour, and it’s got these lovely little bits in it. Rather your thing, I’d’ve thought.”
Ed hummed. “Yeah, dairy hasn’t been treating me that well lately,” he said, and shoved the tub into Stede’s hands to pick up one of three Ben & Jerry’s pints. He shook it pointedly. “This stuff’s just as yummy without the cow part,” he said. Stede took note of the green lids and sighed.
“I suppose I could… try ,” he said softly, looking down at the ice cream that had been shoved into his hands.
He glanced around before he stepped to a drawer and pulled out a spoon. He was very aware of the fast food sitting heavy in his full belly, and really, he’d expected to have a break before eating again, a break which would allow him to eat his dinner without seeming… suspiciously full.
But it looks like that break was well and truly off the table. Still, he reckoned he could manage to pull it off.
When he looked back up at Ed, as if he was asking to be given permission to start eating, as if he expected Ed to suddenly say no, stop, don’t, what he found instead—which somehow surprised him—was Ed frowning into the distance.
“Hey, Stede,” Ed was saying in a tone a little too serious for Stede to hear right now without panicking.
“Yeah?” Stede felt, for some reason, like he was about to be accused of some heinous crime, and moreover that whatever it was, he was guilty of it.
“Do you even like ice cream?” Ed asked, and it wasn’t what Stede had expected. He let out a breath he hadn’t realised he’d been holding, and suddenly he felt a lot less like he was going to die.
“Well, doesn’t everyone like ice cream?” Stede answered, a tad shrill and rushed for his liking, but still.
Ed laughed. “You’ve got me there,” he said. “Just realised I’ve barely ever seen you eat it, though.”
Stede hummed. “I suppose I don’t really indulge myself as much as I could.” That had been true for a while now, but not for at least a month. The weight of the lying was settling in his chest as heavy as the food in his belly. In some ways, the two things were one in the same. The soft pleasure of being full was beginning to sour as the guilt tainted it.
“You don’t have to eat it, if you don’t want to…” Ed said, and there was a gentleness in his tone that brought Stede back to life a little, but made him… almost sad, too. “But, fuck, I kinda need the space in the freezer. So it can’t go back in there.”
“No, no, I’ll eat it,” Stede promised. “I just… don’t feel quite myself is all, and… well, that’s all. I’ll finish it. If you want me to, for you.”
Ed smiled, but he shook his head a little. “Nah, finish it if you want to, man,” he said.
“Well, yes, I do, but, just… tell me you want me to, if you would. Ed. Please? I’m just… I’m not quite feeling myself, I… had a strange day, I’m… hm. Hm.”
“Aw, mate. You can eat it, go on. You’ve gotta anyway, or it’ll melt, if you need an excuse. But come on, love—” (Ed gave his exposed belly a little pat-pat ) “—You know I’m not gonna judge you.”
Ed was ever so good at making Stede feel good. In the moment. He knew he’d be terrified later that he’d missed some frown or eye-roll or some hidden dissappointment Ed didn’t want to bother him with. For now, though…
“Yes, dear. And… I rather would like a treat, I think.”
“Cool,” Ed said, shoving his ice cream into the freezer in a… rather precarious-looking, but very effective pile. He pulled a bag of chips out of the bag on the countertop and headed into the living room, Stede following behind him with his spoon and ice cream.
Ed opened the bag and started snacking as Stede put on some random episode of Star Trek on the television in front of them.
Stede was taking his first—delicious, sweet, creamy—mouthful, when Ed asked “What should we have for dinner?”
Stede swallowed. “Ice cream?”
Ed chuckled. “Nah, need to get some proper food in us too, y’know.”
“Oh, definitely,” Stede said, only half paying attention.
“That new burger place is on the delivery app,” Ed said. Stede looked over at him, one hand in his chip bag and the other on his phone. His jeans were unbuttoned. Stede realised with a spark of excitement that that was because the jeans were too tight to wear sitting. He’d just gone up a size last month, God, he was— “Oooh, they have mac’n’cheese croquettes!”
“Thought you weren’t doing dairy lately,” Stede said with a smile.
“Well, I can’t go filling up on dairy products there are perfectly good substitutes for and upset my tummy too much to have something there’s simply no replacement for…” Ed said wistfully.
“Hmm. We could do curry. Or pizza—vegan cheese. You do like that, don’t you?”
“I do…” Ed said, still pouting.
Stede smiled fondly. “Get what you want. You still have my card on your app, don’t you?”
Ed nodded, smiling. Stede found he was far too distracted thinking about finishing the ice cream to smile back.
“Sure you don’t want a vote in what I’m getting filled with tonight?” Ed checked one last time.
“Well, I had some ideas,” Stede said, looking down at his lap.
“Bold of you to assume I’ll have room for that after I’m done with dinner,” Ed teased.
Bold of Stede himself to imagine he’d be up to it after he’d had this ice cream and a second dinner. He’d already be breathless just sitting there… how would he manage to fuck himself into Ed?
“Fuck,” Stede breathed.
Ed winked at him, but little did Ed know that his own words were only half what was driving Stede wild right now.
As they fell into a comfortable silence, screen in front of them, Stede could allow himself to sort of… zone out, a little, and eat.
It really was good ice cream. Just as good as last night, and the night before.
Even as he felt his belly protest a little against more food, felt a slight ache, it was too good not to keep going. With a screen in front of them both he at least felt like his eating could move into the background and Ed might not notice much of it.
Well, that was sort of the idea anyway, until Ed turned to him and asked “Enjoying the ice cream?”
Stede glanced down, spoon in mouth. The tub really was nearly empty now, only a few precious bites left. “You know… I really am,” he confessed.
Surely Ed couldn’t fault him for that.
If he knew that Stede wanted to be so full, stuffed. That Stede fantasised about getting bigger, too. About being fed, sometimes, as well… he didn’t know what would happen, exactly, but he was afraid of it.
But he could at the very least know that Stede liked ice cream. What would the harm be?
Stede hummed, pleased, as he took another bite.
Ed was smiling at him. Stede smiled back, although for some reason he was a little uncomfortable. He realised, suddenly, that it was the waistband of his pants digging in.
Oh, dear.
He’d just have to put up with it. Surely… Ed would know something Stede didn’t want him to if Stede undid his pants while they were eating.
The doorbell interrupted his enjoyment of the very last spoonful of ice cream.
“I’ll get it, babe!” Ed stood.
Stede smiled. Ed’s eager appetite never ceased to delight him.
---
It would have been nothing short of sadism to leave Ed to the mountain of food in front of them both without offering a helping hand.
But Stede had not accounted for the ice cream, or just how much food Ed would get them when left to his own devices with Stede’s credit card and as many menus to have his pick from as he could ever want. Not when he had eaten that fast food like… like he’d needed it. He didn’t, he knew he didn’t.
He was so full.
The fast food, the ice cream, and then he’d managed to work his way through most of a serving of hot creamy soup, vegetables and noodles, together in a blend that was absolutely delicious, but even so… sat so heavy in his overfull stomach with the rest of it all.
And Ed had offered Stede half a pizza, and Stede… well, he couldn’t back down. Couldn’t reveal how much he’d secretly already eaten by tapping out ‘too full’ now. Not that it would be strange of Stede to do so… not that Ed hadn’t seen Stede eat a lot, but Ed probably knew as well as Stede did that one bowl of soup and noodles, no matter how heavy, wasn’t enough to slow Stede down. Despite the ice cream.
So Stede was trying. Powering on. Ed had already eaten a serving of the noodle soup himself, and at least a dozen warm dumplings, his half of the pizza… and one or two other little containers of food that had been devoured while Stede was worrying over his bellyache, before he’d really taken note of what was inside.
And Ed was beautiful, rubbing his full belly with a few smears of sauce around his mouth. Even shifting next to Stede, letting out a satisfied burp, he was beautiful. No, especially like that.
And Stede felt… strange. Satisfied, with a spark of excitement he couldn’t quite begin to explain, so full. Middle heavy with food, it was delightfully indulgent. At the same time, he felt… shameful. As if it were selfish to indulge in these urges, as if Ed wouldn’t want him like this. The vulnerability in it, opening himself to softness. He was supposed to be steady, strong… teasing, praising… providing, feeding.
Not being fed.
It wasn’t as if Stede hadn’t enjoyed this satisfaction before in his time, but when he had met Ed, his attentions had been—for a while—thoroughly diverted onto the other man. And he adored completely everything about feeding Ed, indulging Ed, spoiling Ed and watching him grow with it. But he couldn’t deny that lately, his own… personal urges had returned. That naughty pleasure that came with his own fullness, fat, and jiggle.
Oh, he still wanted those things from Ed. He was just… feeling his weakness for those things in himself rear its head. And, well… that wasn’t the dynamic he’d built with Edward. It never had been. How could it ever work if Stede… imposed his weakest desires? Onto Ed? It wouldn’t be fair.
Still, Stede tipped the last bits of his creamy soup and noodles into his mouth, trying to very very subtly push the waistband of his trousers beneath the swell of his belly so he could just breathe. Tailored as they were, he could admit they were probably too small now. Secret indulgences had been growing more frequent, and it was beginning to show. Which felt strange to acknowledge even in the privacy of his own mind. Good and embarrassing all at once.
He huffed a little as he leaned forward for a slice of the pizza, and before he knew it, a loud burp escaped him, freed from the shift forward. He could feel his face reddening as Ed looked over at him. His eyes searched for anything but Ed to look at, for a moment.
“I’m sorry,” Stede gushed. “That is to say—excuse me, Ed. Hah…” The awkward huff of laughter trailed into an uncertain silence. Stede felt almost as if he were waiting for Ed to scold him, say you’re not excused, you pig! Which didn’t make sense, but Stede was so afraid and he barely knew why. So afraid of Ed knowing how stuffed he was.
“Damn, Stede, didn’t know you had that in you. Hey, have I ever heard you burp before?” Ed seemed… just sort of happy, which was probably a good sign.
“Maybe not,” Stede answered him, only just realising that for the first time.
“Didn’t think about it ‘til now. Well, don’t hold back on my account. Fuck knows I of all people couldn’t ask you to. That would be some hypocrisy.”
Stede nodded, still red, barely registering the words. He was going to at least make an attempt to muffle burps in front of Ed anyway. Surely Ed didn’t want to see that. So whatever Ed said about it didn’t matter. Yeah, that made sense. For sure.
Stede took a bite of the slice he’d picked up, chewed and swallowed, uncomfortably aware of both actions. The mouthful pushed into his belly, practically unwelcome. Well, the pizza was a lot, even though it was quite small and shared between them really if he hadn’t gorged himself earlier he should have been able to get it down, but… fuck.
He managed another bite, but it sat so heavy in his belly. If he was alone, he would rub the swell of his gut and perhaps allow himself to fall into the pleasure of it. But as it was, so embarrassed and uncomfortable and afraid to show it, he swallowed his own spit heavily and couldn’t contain a small groan of discontent.
Ed, sweet as he was—but also, fucking damnit—noticed the sound immediately. “Stede, love?” he said. “You ‘right there?”
Stede took as deep a breath as he could manage. His capacity did not begin to match Ed’s. “Ed, I think…” he felt like crying. But he had to say it. “I don’t think I can finish. I’m a bit too full.” The words tumbled out and Stede closed his eyes
“Already?” Ed blurted. Stede opened his eyes to watch Ed wince and amend himself. “Are you feeling okay? Tummy all good? Doesn’t hurt?”
Stede’s hands flew to his middle before he’d really thought about it. “Maybe I just… had something it didn’t like,” he said, still not meeting Ed’s eyes. And then he struck out and did look right into them, bright and searching and beautiful. “What about you? Impressive helping you got down, can’t imagine you won’t need a belly rub after that.”
Stede could tell he hadn’t managed to keep his tone unaffected by his anxiety by the way Ed looked at him for a few moments after he’d spoken, so he tried for a smile, bit his lip as the way Ed’s eyes began to crinkle at the corners just a little in response.
“What, all that? Nah, normal dinner for me, I’m fine.” Ed was teasing Stede, his fingers slowly pulling up his shirt, tracing softly over the stretch marks Stede’s lavish treatment had left on him.
“Oh my, what an appetite you have,” Stede played the game back. “No wonder you can’t stop getting bigger and bigger and… bigger.”
Stede tried not to pant as he shifted closer to Ed, hands reaching out towards the other man’s bulging middle, eager as ever. He pressed his fingers gently into Ed’s upper belly, felt beneath the hefty layer of softness for the give of his lover’s stomach, and he smiled a little, feeling more at home in this at least. But there was a unique pleasure he couldn’t quite quantify in feeling a similar heavy tightness in himself as he poked and prodded at Ed and felt the same.
“But if that was nothing, then you must still have room for dessert.” Stede watched Ed’s eyes widen and his pupils dilate as Stede mouthed ice cream.
“If you want to feed me more, you go and get it. I don’t want to move,” Ed said with a devious little grin that made Stede want to comb his fingers through Ed’s hair and take hold of a handful, remind Ed how greedy he was being and how cute it was.
But he didn’t know if he could manage the position required. Well, not without pressing his belly into Ed, and he was far too embarrassed to allow Ed to feel his tummy right now.
He huffed as he slowly stood, feeling… off-balance and round, middle-heavy.
“Woah, Stede, mate, are you sure you’re alright? You look… fuck, you look kinda bloated.” Ed’s words had dropped the playful tone now, and Stede could feel Ed’s eyes on him. On his stomach. His stupid, fat, stuffed belly.
“Lunch might not have agreed with me, or any number of things. It’s… a little uncomfortable, but love, I’m fine. It’s your belly we’ve got to worry about!” Stede tried for a wink for emphasis, but he feared he wasn’t very good at those, because Ed didn’t quite look placated.
“Really, Ed, it’s nothing. Minor disturbance. Don’t want to talk about it,” Stede said as he walked out of the room. By the time he was at the fridge, he was a little out of breath, and even as he gathered the ice cream he wanted to feed Ed, he felt himself becoming unsure.
“Ed?” he called from the other room, almost grateful they didn’t need to see each other for just a moment.
“Yeah?” Ed called back.
“I… would you hate if… I… God, I don’t know how to say…” Stede called.
“Please tell me,” Ed called back, and Stede heard the couch creaking as the pillows shifting and knew Ed was getting up. The floorboards creaked, too, and Ed’s footfalls were… satisfyingly heavy, coming towards Stede, despite Stede’s uncertainty. “Please tell me,” Ed repeated again from the doorway behind where Stede stood.
“Ed, I think I want something, but I’m not really sure if I can say,” Stede said. “I feel bad, but I think…”
“What’s wrong, love?” Ed asked, stepping closer.
Stede turned around to look at Ed, his belly rounded with fullness and soft with love and care. Thighs thick, arms thick, face soft. He was beautiful. He was so beautiful, and yet Stede wanted…
“I want to be alone,” Stede said. “For a while.”
Ed went still for a moment. Looked Stede almost up and down. “Is that… is that all?” he asked.
“Ed, I’m… hmm. I’m so sorry. Is it ok? Will you be ok?”
“Will you be ok?” Ed echoed back.
“I’ll be fine,” Stede said, turning away again.
“I’ll be fine, too. Definitely not my first go at getting an uber stuffed,” Ed said, and Stede winced a little as he thought for a moment on times very very early on when they had first started dating, where Stede’s anxiety had lead to Ed needing to return home alone and Stede had really hated himself just a bit, for needing the space. “I’ll be fine, Stede, if you will be.”
“I will,” Stede said, before he noticed himself saying it. Like something else had used his mouth for those words. They came out before he’d agreed to them. Before he trusted them, and he still wasn’t certain.
“If you’re sick, you know I don’t mind staying,” Ed said.
“I’ll be fine,” Stede said again. He wasn’t entirely sure that he would have been able to say anything but those words if Ed had pressed any more, which wouldn’t have been any good at all for the case he was making. It was hard just to say those ones.
But Stede’s tummy hurt, and he was so embarrassed, and he needed Ed to leave so he could privately deal with his guilty pleasure and squash the shame into submission by attempting to ignore it.
“I’m sorry you’re feeling weird,” Ed said. “I love you.”
“Thanks,” Stede replied awkwardly, and smacked himself lightly on the forehead. Thanks? Thanks you love me?
Ed didn’t say anything. And then, Stede realised, Ed’s bag was on the kitchen counter beside Stede, Clumsily, he grabbed it and shoved it towards Ed. Ed took it, looked at Stede again with a question Stede couldn’t place in his eyes, and turned away.
When the door swung closed, Stede sighed. He realised, with a wave of relief, that he had inadvertently been sucking in his tummy to the best of his ability while Ed was there, and he could now peacefully let it out, which gave him so much more room to breathe. That and undoing the button of his pants.
Stede could not lie to himself and say he didn’t like the feeling, the fullness. He wouldn’t subject himself to it if he didn’t. But that enjoyment, in light of Ed’s presence had been clouded with shame worse than the usual passive embarrassment he felt at the weakness of giving in.
He went back over, sat back down on the couch and tried to simply enjoy the pressure in his belly, the heft and size of himself. It would be ok. It needed to be ok.
His phone buzzed. The reminder that a world outside this moment existed was almost jarring. It was Ed.
Ed Teach [8:54 pm]
Hey. Is anything wrong?
Within an instant, Stede found his mind was almost entirely overtaken by a million fast-paced versions of the future that all inevitably lead to doom. Stede and Ed had an established dynamic. Stede was terrified to ruin it and… and ruin them. By being honest about what was wrong: how much he liked to do everything he did to Ed to himself, too. What that might mean.
Stede switched off notifications in settings. He wanted some time to himself with this, just a few moments to calm down. He loved Ed, but he didn’t want Ed right now.
Not when he was so certain Ed wouldn’t want Stede if he knew what Stede wanted.
Stede palmed tentatively at his belly. Slowly hiked up his shirt as if it were forbidden. God, he was full. With Ed encouraging him with the ice cream and everything that had happened before and after, he was probably more full than he’d ever been.
It was lovely to imagine Ed’s encouragement, Ed’s praise, maybe even Ed’s voice whispering about what all this gluttony would do to his body. But Stede knew he shouldn’t.
He shouldn’t…
---
Stede hadn’t texted Ed back for three days. Not that that was that long… it wasn’t like they lived together, Ed thought, Stede’s spare keys heavy in his hands as he looked down at them. Some days they wouldn’t speak… that was ok, right?
But it wasn’t. Stede never went this long without replying to Ed, and it was driving Ed up the fucking wall. But the last time he was there, Stede had seemed so uncomfortable… and with these keys… he didn’t want to go back, he felt like he wouldn’t be able to stop himself from… imposing. Stede had wanted space.
He hadn’t even responded to Ed asking if he was ok that first night. What if something really bad happened to him…
Ed shook off the anxiety as irrational. There’d been plenty of other times Stede had been busy, or had phone troubles or something, and Ed had panicked only for it to be nothing and Stede to be so upset Ed had been worried… but Stede had never been radio silent this long before…
Ed sighed, shoving Stede’s spare keys back into the pocket of his (tight) black jeans. He sighed again, and tipped back the last of his drink, chasing the melancholy brewing in his chest like… like pressing on a bruise.
Ed had more or less resigned himself to a horrible, miserable, lonely night, when he caught sight of a familiar face sitting down across the bar. Just… not the face he wanted to see. Ed was standing before he’d thought about it, making a beeline that left clipped shoulders and scoffs of annoyance in his wake.
“Lucius,” he said, looking at the boy.
“Fuck,” Lucius said, grabbing the drink in front of his… date? And knocking it back in one. “I’m not driving you anywhere tonight!”
“No, man, that’s- that’s not what I was… listen, have you heard from Stede recently?”
Lucius’s demeanour of lighthearted defiance was dropping, and his expression was overtaken by confusion and, unless Ed was imagining it, a little concern.
“Why?” the boy asked. “Have you… not heard from Stede recently?”
“It’s been three days. He hasn’t even read my texts,” Ed found himself confessing. “Have you heard from him or not. I- I’m just… fuck, I don’t know. I don’t get it. I’m worried about it, man.”
Lucius grimaced a little. “Sorry, just- I sold him some bud yesterday? I sorta thought that might’ve had something to do with you, just because… has he ever been high before? I thought he’d want someone with him.”
Stede and Ed had smoked together a few times, Stede’s first few and Ed’s first few since once or twice as a teenager. Ed’s fear spiked at how strange this all was, how concerning. With anxiety thundering through him, Ed couldn’t help but project a little frustration outwards. Old instinct. “Stede doesn’t pay you enough to drive his car, you gotta sell him drugs, too?”
“Well, no? Not really? But it’s kinda hard to introduce dealers to brand new clients that happen to be middle-aged white guys with dad energy, so I just kinda… acted as a middle-man. Have you called him? He was acting pretty normal when I spoke to him, except that he was buying weed off me, but he’s not exactly the most predictable guy, you know?”
Something must’ve been wrong. This wasn’t like Stede, not for ages now. Fuck. Had Ed done something wrong? Something to ruin it?
Last time they were together… Ed’d sorta… done the thing with the ice cream. Maybe… encouraged Stede to eat more than he normally would…
Ed had overstepped. Clearly, Stede didn’t appreciate Ed’s little push to eat just a bit too much. Ed should’ve known, right? This thing, it had only ever gone one way. Why the fuck did he mess with it like that? Fuck, Stede didn’t want that. Stede didn’t want to see Ed anymore…
“Ed? Ed!”
Ed snapped back to reality after a few moments and realised Lucius had been trying to get his attention for longer than he’d been aware of it, like an echo in his brain.
“What?” Ed asked, his mouth dry.
“I don’t know what’s going on in your head, babe, but Stede absolutely adores you. You know that, right? If he’s not reading your texts, it’s gotta be a mistake. Something’s wrong. You need to talk to him.”
The self-loathing that had been eating at Ed’s brain turned back to concern, suddenly. Stede wasn’t reading any of Ed’s texts, or answering any of Ed’s calls, but he was buying drugs and not telling anyone about it?
Fuck. Something was wrong.
Maybe it was Ed. Maybe it wasn’t. Ed stepped back from the table with a huff, embarrassed of the jiggle of his tummy for the first time in months . He needed a drink.
He picked up the cocktail menu as he leant on the bar, batting his lashes at the bartender.
---
Stede narrowed his eyes in concentration, rolling the paper a tad unsteadily around its green contents. He should have asked Lucius to help him with this part, really, but he hadn’t wanted to seem like a complete square, or whatever.
The only reason he had any ability to do this whatsoever was because he often did it for Ed and him. Ed, at least, had some experience rolling from when he smoked cigarettes, and he used that skill to attempt to teach Stede this, but Ed had fallen out of practice, and Stede found he quite liked fiddling about trying to roll joints. Though he and Ed had only done it a few times, he rather considered it had become one of his jobs, between the two of them.
Stede loved watching how much Ed could put away when he wasn’t completely aware of just how much he was eating. He also loved the excuse… to just… gorge himself, by Ed’s side, without having to bring up that he was a failure of a feeder with his own stupid little urges that—
He just needed to relax. And eat. He wanted to. He just felt… weird about it. Could he keep this secret forever? Maybe he did need to just bite the bullet and talk to Ed. Ed… he hadn’t spoken to Ed in a while. He hadn’t been checking the chat, but then, no notifications had come through prompting him to.
Stede darted his tongue out to seal the joint, and sighed as he picked up the blue lighter Ed had bought for him the first time they’d smoked together, and headed towards the balcony.
---
Ed felt the warm buzz of the liquor easing over him. But no matter how many drinks he got in him, he was still thinking about Stede.
He needed to see Stede. Needed to talk to him. But Stede wasn’t answering his stupid texts! He needed to see Stede.
Stede had given Ed a key. Maybe Ed should pay a visit. Maybe he should just make sure Stede was ok. He wouldn’t have given Ed a key if he hated him, would he?
---
Stede was… Stede was high. He was thinking more in a twirl than a straight line, and if he knew anything at all, it was that the food in front of him tasted so ridiculously good it was criminal Ed wasn’t here to share it with him. God knew there was enough for two.
Or, there had been, a while ago… hmm… Stede must have eaten more than he realised. Still, he wasn’t quite ready to slow down. Floating on a fucking cloud, he only noticed the pressure in his tummy as he leant forward to pull more of his feast towards him and keep eating.
The television was playing reruns of Yes Minister, and Stede couldn’t make heads nor tails of the jokes, but for some reason, it was hilarious anyway. He sort of preferred that he wasn’t taking it in, though, because he wasn’t thinking about it hard enough, or seeing it clearly enough, for it to distract him from that pleasant hot feeling inside him. That electric liquid arousal at his own gluttony.
He wasn’t full yet. He hardly felt full. He was only reminded of the bodily sensation of fullness when he moved, or breathed too deeply. He was catching his breath after losing himself for a moment to a rather fervent bout of eating—it all just tasted so good, he couldn’t help himself, and oh what a thought that was—when a burp escaped him, catching him off guard. Fuck, that was loud.
As a force of habit, he took the empty box strewn with grease stains and crumbs and made to place it beside the pile of other containers and packaging, empty and licked clean, that he’d already accumulated. It just so happened then that he started to blink back a little more awareness. That pile of empty containers was… a lot. He’d eaten a lot. Oh, wow.
His mouth was a bit dry, now, and he struggled to his feet, feeling a bit like a flipped turtle for a moment before he managed it. It jostled another burp out of him, which distracted him for a moment before… oh, God. He felt off-balance, his stomach felt like it was positively bulging out before him, packed stupidly full. His shirt was clinging to it.
“Oh, God…” Stede found himself muttering aloud.
The movement of getting up seemed to have disturbed his stomach, and he hiccuped loudly, clutching his belly with a wince.
As the moments passed, Stede found the world around him becoming clearer as the muffled haze eased off, but the sharpness that starting to sober up brought the ache of his overfull stomach left him missing the full effects of the drug.
Luckily, he’d rolled a few before he started, so it wouldn’t be too much trouble now to go for a second round.
Carefully, near-cradling his stomach, Stede made his way to the back door again and took a seat outside with a huff. He had an automatic spike of anxiety at the sound of another presence on the balcony below, but he found he didn’t care enough about that to stop himself slipping the joint between his lips and clicking the lighter.
As the cool breeze carried away clouds of bitter smoke from his lips, Stede started to lose his grasp on what had been on his mind lately. And the fullness of his stomach, the discomfort in his sides and above his navel from the tightness of it, began to escape him also.
He squirmed a little where he sat as he realised his appetite had returned and he knew he could coax even more into his stuffed gut. Somehow the thought was so hot.
He swayed a little as he stood, turning as he suddenly remembered to put out the joint on the purple ashtray Ed’d got them a while back. Ed… Stede couldn’t help but feel as if there was something he was forgetting.
Oh well, it was probably nothing. He was just… stoned.
His mouth was already watering in anticipation of filling his belly even more than he already had.
---
So he was drunk. So what? He was a grown man, he could have a fucking drink when he wanted. He just hoped Stede wouldn’t worry, seeing him like this. “Fucking lock!! Take it already you— there!” Ed finally managed to slip the spare key into the lock of Stede’s apartment.
He snuck, as much as he could sneak in this state, into the front corridor, closing the door quietly behind him and pausing to take in his surroundings. There was no immediate response to his entry, and he cringed at the thought that Stede could be asleep, and he’d just let himself into the man’s home.
But then- a noise. A muffled, halting whine. A lot of thoughts went through Ed’s head at once. Was Stede hurt? Fuck, had Ed just walked in on him jerking off? Did Stede do that? Was he crying? Did he smoke too much and green out on his living room floor all alone?
Ed poked his head around the doorframe, looking for Stede. “Stede—Holy fuck .”
Stede was on the couch, gloriously dishevelled, encircled by a medley of… of… fucking binge debris. Packaging, boxes, and containers; empty, except for dregs, grease, crumbs…
The horny hit before anything else. The worry came second, wondering why this was all happening, but then… Stede turned a little, and Ed got a proper view of him. Pants undone, buttons of his shirt straining—
Stede’s belly was too big for his shirt, and Ed could even see glimpses of pink freckles flesh between the buttons.
Fuuuuck. That was hot. That was too fucking hot for Ed to handle.
“Ed? Oh, this is so emb— ouurp —embarrassing…” Stede lifted his arms clumsily, as if they could ever hope to cover the bulge of his middle.
“No the fuck it isn’t. Stede, mate, this’s the hot- hottest fuckin’ thing I’ve ever seen,” Ed managed to get out, stumbling toward the couch and sitting down heavily, the alcohol in his belly making an audible little slosh as he hit the cushions.
“Hot? You… you think I’m hot like this ?” Stede asked.
“Jesus, Stede, you couldn’t— hic —be fuckin’ hotter…”
“I thought you’d… I thought you’d think I was silly. ‘M sposed to feed you, like… how are you going to take me seriously when I’m…” Stede trailed off as Ed’s hands found his belly and started to unbutton the tight shirt.
Ed groaned as Stede’s belly rushed forward into the free space with the button pinching around his bellybutton unclasped. He ground his hips uselessly into nothing as Stede’s belly gurgled softly and Stede moaned involuntarily.
“How d’you feel when I’m fuckin’ full or… getting bigger…?” Ed slurred, flopping towards Stede and making a clumsy attempt to climb on top of him.
Stede moaned. “Good, so good,” he whimpered. Another little burp escaped his lips as Ed pushed him backwards.
“Stede, love, I feel the same. When we swap? Mate, I feel the same.”
Stede grabbed Ed’s wrists and pulled the other man’s hands back to his tummy again. “Sorry I sent you home… I was embarrassed… I was full and I liked it and I thought- I thought you wouldn’t.”
“You can be a bit dense sometimes, man. Fuuuck, Stede. You’re so hot…” Ed had finally found something to grind into. Knee either side of Stede’s torso, his rapidly filling cock pressed into Stede’s flushed belly as he undid the rest of the buttons of Stede’s shirt one by one, barely resisting the urge just to rip it open and forgo his numb fumbling fingers the trouble.
Stede groaned as he made a pathetic, overstuffed attempt to rut into Ed’s ample arse.
Ed moaned, needy, embarrassingly unrestrained, his tongue peeking out over his lower lip and his eyes unfocused as he pulled his jeans open and forced them down, nearly toppling off Stede with how his head spun as he moved. In the end, he left them around his ankles.
“Ahh… Ed… so full…” Stede whimpered beneath him.
Ed found himself tossing his shirt across the room, and it hit something, but he didn’t care. He leant down into Stede, sitting on Stede’s lap, nose nearly touching his. Ed’s cock was between their bellies, and it felt sooo good there… but he was aching to put it somewhere else, too. Shit, he didn’t know if he was gonna last.
Shimming down just a tiny bit, trying to decide how to position himself and how to manoeuvre his lover, realising he needed to remove the prison he’d put around his own ankles, his eyes were still transfixed on Stede’s flushed, fat belly, distended from an obscenely huge feast.
There was a shift in his arousal and he sat back up on Stede’s lap, closing his eyes and clenching his fists. Fuck. He could make it, he could. He could fuck Stede. He just needed to focus. But he couldn’t unsee what was beneath him, the sight from before he’d screwed his eyes shut. Stede’s cock was pink and leaking against the blond’s belly, and so was Ed’s.
Fuck it. He opened his eyes and looked again. It took all thoughts from Ed’s brain, and he couldn’t help but lean forward again. Cock beneath his own belly and against Stede’s, pressed into softness… fuck… Stede was so hot… so full… so big…
“Ed, ple— uuhrp —please.”
Ed couldn’t help it. He tensed, before he could stop it. A halting moan tumbled from his open mouth and he grabbed a fistful of couch cushion, and he tried to pull back. But he was already spilling across Stede’s bulging middle.
“Fuck,” he squeaked.
Stede moaned and wriggled beneath Ed’s softening cock. “ Ed, ” he whined, blinking up at Ed with a pout.
“I-I-m sorry, I thought I’d last long enough to- to- fuck, Stede, sorry.”
“It’s… it’ll be ok… don’t worry about it…” Stede mumbled.
Ed frowned. “No, love… let me take care of you.”
“You don’t have to…”
Ed licked from his palm to his ring finger and wrapped his hand around the base of Stede’s cock, sweeping up as Stede shuddered and writhed. Stede bit his lip as Ed ran his thumb over the tip, smearing Stede’s precome before sliding back down to the base, drawing out a needy petulant whine from the other man as his hand came to a standstill there.
“Ate good tonight, didn’t you, sweetheart?” Ed found himself saying, cadence a little clumsy from drink, but the sound Stede made convinced him they’d been the right choice.
“Maybe I did…” Stede panted.
“Did so fuckin’ good, by the looks of it. Ate sooo much for me, didn’t you, love?” Ed grinned as Stede whined. Ed started moving again, up and down over the length of Stede’s arousal. “Good boy, that’s it… you just lie back and digest, and I’ll take care of you. Make you feel so good, hmm? You deserve it, after eating so well for me.”
Stede’s breath came harder and sharper, Ed watched Stede’s hands fly to his own belly as he shuddered and moved his hips up as if he could push himself further into Ed’s moving hand. It was adorable, and it was so fucking hot.
Ed was moving faster as Stede moaned louder. Ed felt it coming, and Stede tensed and shivered. “That’s it, love. Theeere you go,” Ed said as Stede spilled over his fingers with a gasp.
They sat there, sticky and panting, for a few moments.
Then, “Fuck,” Stede groaned. “My belly…”
“Mmm, yes, your belly,” Ed said, his hands smearing through their come as they ran across the curve of it. At Stede’s expression, he glanced around and found a stray napkin to begin making an attempt at cleaning Stede up. They’d both need a shower, and Ed was very much looking forward to that. But this would do for the moment.
“What- um, what do you think of it?” Stede asked.
Ed’s jaw dropped. As if Stede couldn’t fucking tell, after all that? He patted it fondly. “I think it’s got some catching up to do.”
Stede looked Ed right in the eyes, a bewildered expression etched into his adorable features. For a moment, Ed began to wonder if this was all a mistake, but then, Stede interrupted his worry. “Is that a promise?”